When people you don't know get really mean

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I have had a small amount of success in my chosen field, am slightly well known in my little wee scene, and care a lot about what I do and hope I am always honest. That being said, is it utterly stupid to have my feelings hurt when a total stranger spends at least the equivilant of an hour personally berating me on a message board? Mind you, I have had things happen to me that were VERY lucky breaks, without specifically trying for them, and I have never taken myself very seriously at what I do, so maybe this is frustrating for others. I would like to also mention, I am not 'cool'; I am not mean to people. I am mostly goofy and occassionally sweaty. I think the things that have happened to me are goddamn lucky breaks and flukes. I don't know why they've happened, so it is hard to be resented for them. What is the best way to weather the vitrolic hate of strangers for that which you put your whole heart into?

― not cool, Friday, 4 March 2005 18:54 (twenty years ago)

Remember that a) you don't know theml b) they don't know you; c) you got the breaks and they didn't, so tough titty for them.

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Friday, 4 March 2005 18:56 (twenty years ago)

Send them a vagina rejuvenation gift token.

― Penelope_111 (Penelope_111), Friday, 4 March 2005 18:57 (twenty years ago)

Christ, I always forget that. Penelope OTM.

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Friday, 4 March 2005 18:58 (twenty years ago)

go with the assumption that there are no lucky breaks, only people who are smart enough and work hard enough and stick around long enough to put themselves in the right position to get breaks, and the people who don't do that and then fail have no reason to whine. They're really bitching at themselves more than they're bitching at you. Remember that it's not you, it could be anyone that has more success than they do who they'd let loose on.

― Gear! (can Jung shill it, Mu?) (Gear!), Friday, 4 March 2005 18:59 (twenty years ago)

Does the institute do vaginal sand removal? (xxpost)

― Curious George Rides a Republican (Rock Hardy), Friday, 4 March 2005 18:59 (twenty years ago)

also, mix laxatives in the "olive branch" brownies you make for them.

― Gear! (can Jung shill it, Mu?) (Gear!), Friday, 4 March 2005 19:00 (twenty years ago)

If you find out, not cool, let me know. My feelings get hurt a little too easily by these types of things as well.

― Leon the Fatboy (Ex Leon), Friday, 4 March 2005 19:05 (twenty years ago)

Calum?

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 4 March 2005 19:06 (twenty years ago)

Thanks for the advice. I guess the thing to keep in mind is that no band I have ever liked and no writer I have ever liked hasn't been mocked, scorned and generally been unappreciated by someone. I guess if I get off on strangers liking what I do, I have to suck it up and put my nose to the grindstone when they hate it. Lesson: when people hate you, get back to work and then work harder and then work harder.

― not cool, Friday, 4 March 2005 19:38 (twenty years ago)

hey, at least they didn't send you pizza.

― g-kit (g-kit), Saturday, 5 March 2005 09:31 (twenty years ago)

You gotta understand that the vitriolic hate that was being aimed at you did not originate in anything you did or said, or failed to do or say. That hate was born in another place and another time for another reason and rightly belongs to another person you never met. You just happened to resemble the target it wanted to hit. That is just a piece of unavoidable bad luck.

Emotions are not highly discriminating, delicately calibrated instruments. They operate in a fuzzy world of broad generalizations and superficial resemblances - they live in the land of of "act now and ask questions later." As such, you just set off this guy's emotional trigger by matching some vague pattern he keeps stored in his brain. Maybe it's that cologne you wear. Who knows? Anyway, it ain't your fault.

― Aimless (Aimless), Saturday, 5 March 2005 19:06 (twenty years ago)

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