Tonight a cat attempted to gouge my right eye out

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I visited a friend of mine this evening at to borrow a couple of records for this party tomorrow night. Whilst waiting in her living room as she gets the LPs from the bedroom, I noticed her black cat sitting on the couch, watching me intently. Which wasn't surprising, it is a cat after all. So I go over and look at a couple of books on her shelf, leaf through them, and put them back.

I turn around and her cat is atop the door, somehow having climbed up, balancing precariously. Before I can react, the cat hisses and LEAPS at me! I move out of the way but this cat takes a SWIPE at me and its paw catches me in my eye! I stagger back, clutching my eye, as the cat runs towards me, leaps up, and CLAWS at my leg. I kick it away and make a beeline for the kitchen!

The cat has at this point run into the bedroom. My friend, having heard my cries of alarm, has come back into the living room. My eyelid is scratched, and since I'm slightly allergic to cats, already it's a little puffy too. She gets me a bottle of Sapporo and I hold it against my eye, which helps. The puffiness has now subsided.

I was there another 15 minutes, but the cat made several efforts at attacking me again, and my stabs at petting it in a friendly manner were rebuffed with paws across my fingers.

I'm at a loss to explain this random act of violence. Maybe it could tell I prefer dogs? No idea.

― Gear! (can Jung shill it, Mu?) (Gear!), Saturday, 5 March 2005 08:55 (twenty years ago)

I feel your pain. You should meet my little demon sometime. Others here can vouch for this animal's pure ferocity and evil.

― Fish fingers all in a line (kenan), Saturday, 5 March 2005 08:58 (twenty years ago)

http://www.promotega.org/asu00004/images/Evil%20cat.jpg

― Remy (null) (x Jeremy), Saturday, 5 March 2005 08:59 (twenty years ago)

xpost And fuzzyness! Oh, she's so FUZZY AND CUTE! Oh, c'mere you horrible thing from hell, I can never stay mad at you...

― Fish fingers all in a line (kenan), Saturday, 5 March 2005 09:00 (twenty years ago)

the fucker wanted me dead, and I've never been anything but friendly to it.

― Gear! (can Jung shill it, Mu?) (Gear!), Saturday, 5 March 2005 09:03 (twenty years ago)

Cat's do not take that into consideration. Either they like you or they don't. There is no explaining it.

Making a cat who's mean to you into a cat who's nice to you requires becoming the bring of food for a month or two.

― Fish fingers all in a line (kenan), Saturday, 5 March 2005 09:05 (twenty years ago)

This is like women, too.

― Remy (null) (x Jeremy), Saturday, 5 March 2005 09:05 (twenty years ago)

Only less fuzzy.

― Fish fingers all in a line (kenan), Saturday, 5 March 2005 09:06 (twenty years ago)

If I was a monk I could learn to control it

http://www.xs4all.nl/~vpmedia/travelpics/myanmar/myan0019.jpg

― Gear! (can Jung shill it, Mu?) (Gear!), Saturday, 5 March 2005 09:12 (twenty years ago)

My friend used to have a cat with a nervous nature. It chewed off all the fur it could reach on its own body, and in the end basically was covered in stubble apart from one thin line of fur down the top of its back, which it couldn't reach to chew.

It would sit on your lap, be nice as pie, fool you into touching it, then go for you and bite and claw your hands. I love cats, but there's only so much sympathy you can have for something like that.

If this cat attacks you on a regular basis, ask your friend to give it rescue remedy before you call round. Or you could bring it little bits of chicken.

Or you could kick it up the hole when your friend is out of the room, so at least it'll stay out of your way in future.
(NB, you probably shouldn't do that last one)

― accentmonkey (accentmonkey), Saturday, 5 March 2005 11:48 (twenty years ago)

The picture of the monk with his jumping cats makes me incredibly happy.

― sugarpants (sugarpants), Saturday, 5 March 2005 16:07 (twenty years ago)

OH FOR FUCKS SAKE: Ontario bans Pit Bulls

Can we ban the cats, too?

― peepee (peepee), Saturday, 5 March 2005 16:25 (twenty years ago)

The picture of the monk with his jumping cats makes me incredibly happy.

-- sugarpants (signalsfadin...), March 5th, 2005.

he looks really intense and into it too, like he's thinking, "dammit kitty you better get the damned trick right this time or i'm gonna use my YOGA FLAME!"

― latebloomer: Klicken für Details (latebloomer), Saturday, 5 March 2005 16:47 (twenty years ago)

No, but cats can ban us.

― Mr Noodles (Mr Noodles), Saturday, 5 March 2005 16:49 (twenty years ago)

The picture of the monk with his jumping cats makes me incredibly happy.
-- sugarpants (signalsfadin...), March 5th, 2005.

he looks really intense and into it too, like he's thinking, "dammit kitty you better get the damned trick right this time or i'm gonna use my YOGA FLAME!"

It's not that at all... he is using his hypnotic stare to actually make the cats do what he wants.

― Jimmy Mod Has Returned With Spices And Silks (ModJ), Saturday, 5 March 2005 16:52 (twenty years ago)

People are way too soft on cats. I have known so many people who own cats: "Oh, ha ha, my cat scratched my face up this morning to wake me up."

― RS £aRue (rockist_scientist), Saturday, 5 March 2005 16:56 (twenty years ago)

THEY ARE EVIL LITTLE TIGERS!

siegfield and roy to thread.

― cutty (mcutt), Saturday, 5 March 2005 16:59 (twenty years ago)

SIEGFRIED.

― cutty (mcutt), Saturday, 5 March 2005 16:59 (twenty years ago)

Cats can tell when you're allergic to them. I've seen them make a beeline for the only allergic person in the room.

― mike h. (mike h.), Saturday, 5 March 2005 17:02 (twenty years ago)

HELLO ROY!

xpost

― Jimmy Mod Has Returned With Spices And Silks (ModJ), Saturday, 5 March 2005 17:05 (twenty years ago)

People are way too soft on cats. I have known so many people who own cats: "Oh, ha ha, my cat scratched my face up this morning to wake me up."

-- RS £aRue (oumtransmission...), March 5th, 2005.

unlike dogs however, cats can't kill you!

― latebloomer: Klicken für Details (latebloomer), Saturday, 5 March 2005 17:12 (twenty years ago)

...but a cat put me in the hospital (true)

― peepee (peepee), Saturday, 5 March 2005 17:22 (twenty years ago)

meow

― latebloomer: Klicken für Details (latebloomer), Saturday, 5 March 2005 17:23 (twenty years ago)

My sister always swears that black cats are the nastiest (I haven't found that to be the case) and orange cats the gentlest.

― j.lu (j.lu), Saturday, 5 March 2005 17:24 (twenty years ago)

Lots of cats are the nastiest. Calicos and Siamese are also the nastiest.

― Fish fingers all in a line (kenan), Saturday, 5 March 2005 17:26 (twenty years ago)

But yes -- my orange cat is the most docile thing in the world. Cute and wittle and FUZZY! Did I mention fuzzy?

― Fish fingers all in a line (kenan), Saturday, 5 March 2005 17:28 (twenty years ago)

my cats are wobderful.

― latebloomer: Klicken für Details (latebloomer), Saturday, 5 March 2005 18:35 (twenty years ago)

I did know owning a cat affects one's ability to spell.

― peepee (peepee), Saturday, 5 March 2005 20:27 (twenty years ago)

i knew two twin black cats(one fat and one skinny) and they were cool, sometimes they even sat on the sides of the entrance to my neighbors driveway like those lions in front of libraries.

― tremendoid (tremendoid), Saturday, 5 March 2005 21:15 (twenty years ago)

I did know owning a cat affects one's ability to spell.

-- peepee (citywideva...), March 5th, 2005.

no, its the lack of sleep caused by the BARKING OF THE NEIGHBOR'S FUCKING DOG!

― latebloomer: my cats are wobderful (latebloomer), Saturday, 5 March 2005 21:43 (twenty years ago)

goddamn pee pee animals just don't like you, I guess?

― hstencil (hstencil), Saturday, 5 March 2005 21:48 (twenty years ago)

I won't mention the racoons that were in our walls.

― peepee (peepee), Saturday, 5 March 2005 22:19 (twenty years ago)

There have been cases of people suffocated to death whilst sleeping, because their cat has decided to sleep on their face.

My hands are usually covered in scratches from when I've tried to stroke the cat, and he's decided to try to eat my hand. Another trick, if he gets in a hunting mood: pouncing on legs as they walk past.

(but he's lovely cute and friendly really, and loves to sit on top of people and purr when they're trying to sleep)

― caitlin (caitlin), Saturday, 5 March 2005 22:39 (twenty years ago)

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