morning breath.

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Right! Beer, smoke and kebabs all contribute to that morning breath phenomenon.

We’ve all had it, the dehydrated phlegmy feeling 1st thing in the morning but my question is, do you make your girlfriend/partner/one night stand brush their teeth before that inevitable morning snog?

― cavern (cavern1), Thursday, 7 April 2005 11:20 (twenty years ago)

inevitable morning song?

― Dadrock, Meshach and Abednego (Dada), Thursday, 7 April 2005 11:22 (twenty years ago)

Inevitable?

No fucking way. I sleep with a pillow between to create a baby-stink-breath blockade.

― Kate's evil twin (papa november), Thursday, 7 April 2005 11:22 (twenty years ago)

How do you make someone brush their teeth without sounding like their mum (who they would presumably not really fancy having an inevitable morning snog with)? Just get up first, make a cup of tea or coffee, and wait to snog until cleansing saliva/hot drink has been flowing and removed the worst of the badness from the mouth.

― Liz :x (Liz :x), Thursday, 7 April 2005 11:25 (twenty years ago)

that sounds like it would take the fun out of the just-woken-up shag though

― gem (trisk), Thursday, 7 April 2005 11:26 (twenty years ago)

Yeah well if you're feeling that rampant it's not like you care about stinkiness is it? Sweat and other bodily substances all add to the mix.

― Liz :x (Liz :x), Thursday, 7 April 2005 11:27 (twenty years ago)

This is why god invented oral sex.

― Jarlr'mai (jarlrmai), Thursday, 7 April 2005 11:29 (twenty years ago)

hello Hack Journalist du jour, how are you?

I personally think you are responsible for your OWN oral hygeine, and your sexual partner for theirs. So, no. Also, BRUSH YOUR TONGUE TOO. This is key.

― Archel (Archel), Thursday, 7 April 2005 11:31 (twenty years ago)

this is why god invented the spoon position

― gem (trisk), Thursday, 7 April 2005 11:35 (twenty years ago)

Casually offering a polo or chewing gum works sometimes and hasn’t offended anyone yet to my knowledge.

If I did this to you how would you feel/react?

― cavern (cavern1), Thursday, 7 April 2005 11:43 (twenty years ago)

In BED? No, do not offer people freshening products when you have been intimate with them.

― Liz :x (Liz :x), Thursday, 7 April 2005 11:45 (twenty years ago)

First thing in the AM, I'd probably say "hell, I haven't had the chance to brush teeth/mouthwash yet."

Axtually this is an "issue" for me at present and I've been skipping the morning snog rather than getting all diplomatic/confrontational.

― m coleman (lovebug starski), Thursday, 7 April 2005 11:47 (twenty years ago)

haha i would probably piss myself laughing if someone offered me a pre-shag minty

― gem (trisk), Thursday, 7 April 2005 11:49 (twenty years ago)

Talk about spoiling the moment. "Err you're hot and that, but would you mind having a breathmint and maybe a swipe with this feminine freshener before we actually get jiggy?"

― Liz :x (Liz :x), Thursday, 7 April 2005 11:51 (twenty years ago)

If someone offered me a mint when I was miles from my toothbrush after a one-night stand, I’d be grateful to say the least.

― cavern (cavern1), Thursday, 7 April 2005 11:53 (twenty years ago)

"Do you mind gargling before you do that?"

― Dadrock, Meshach and Abednego (Dada), Thursday, 7 April 2005 11:53 (twenty years ago)

Which is preferable I suppose to: "Do you mind gargling while you do that?"

― Dadrock, Meshach and Abednego (Dada), Thursday, 7 April 2005 11:54 (twenty years ago)

I sort of like the fact that kissing on the lips isn't really an option. Forces you to explore other places to kiss/touch/etc. and come up with new fun things.

― Yejoon Koh (Yejoon), Thursday, 7 April 2005 12:11 (twenty years ago)

"that sounds like it would take the fun out of the just-woken-up shag though"

Still fun, but the kissing part's bearable.

― cavern (cavern1), Thursday, 7 April 2005 12:49 (twenty years ago)

Partner's morning breath is reeking?
Don't want to get too close while speaking?
LYSOL MOUTHWASH

― beanz (beanz), Thursday, 7 April 2005 13:06 (twenty years ago)

Partner's breath
Like month-old mince?
Say "good morning" with
LYSOL RINSE.

― Curious George (1/6 Scale Model) (Rock Hardy), Thursday, 7 April 2005 13:18 (twenty years ago)

much better

― beanz (beanz), Thursday, 7 April 2005 13:20 (twenty years ago)

I've told people in no uncertain terms: "If you think you're touching the fun without washing your hands, you're wrong." This is after a night of bars, subways, and cabs. There is no sexing until both parties are clean, no matter what time of the day or night.

― Je4nne ƒury (Jeanne Fury), Thursday, 7 April 2005 13:20 (twenty years ago)

I wouldn't ask anyone to brush, but I might avoid excess kissing.

― Sarah McLusky (coco), Thursday, 7 April 2005 13:22 (twenty years ago)

Also, showering fun! And two clean bodies = no self-consciousness about sweta/odour etc. = classic.

If you're so horny that you can ignore morning breath, then that's pretty cool.

― Markelby (Mark C), Thursday, 7 April 2005 13:24 (twenty years ago)

Also, I don't know why, but if you do plunge into teh snogging after waking up, after a couple of minutes both your breaths will have sweetened up a lot anyway - presumably you've flushed/swallowed the bacteria that have been lurking on your tongue and teeth all night. You're producing enough saliva, fo sho.

― Markelby (Mark C), Thursday, 7 April 2005 13:25 (twenty years ago)

Eskimo kiss. Job done. Erm. Perhaps not.

― Alix with an I ? (alix), Thursday, 7 April 2005 13:26 (twenty years ago)

Just get up first, make a cup of tea or coffee

this is the part which takes the fun out of the wake up shag, not the minty thing.

― gem (trisk), Thursday, 7 April 2005 14:12 (twenty years ago)

Do people really start making out when they wake up? For real? Is your morning routine, like, wake up, make out, make coffee, shower, go to work?

― Jordan (Jordan), Thursday, 7 April 2005 14:24 (twenty years ago)

Also, showering fun!

Showering together = definitely fun

― caitlin (caitlin), Thursday, 7 April 2005 14:24 (twenty years ago)

i don't know what people do when 'they' wake up, i haven't woken up unalone for over a year. when i have been coupled, i have definitely been a fan of the sleepy shag, but i would have a preference for the spoon position. then you avoid the whole morning breath dilemma.

― gem (trisk), Thursday, 7 April 2005 14:27 (twenty years ago)

In BED? No, do not offer people freshening products when you have been intimate with them.

"A mint for your vagina, darling?"

― ken c (ken c), Thursday, 7 April 2005 14:30 (twenty years ago)

ahahahaaaaa. seriously, i hope someone one day offers me a minty in bed. that is gold!

― gem (trisk), Thursday, 7 April 2005 14:31 (twenty years ago)

At my place, the most pressing concerns of mornings are coffee, e-mail, and morning crankiness. :>

― Jordan (Jordan), Thursday, 7 April 2005 14:33 (twenty years ago)

my most pressing concern is my CRUCIAL cup of tea! email, coffee and crankiness can wait till i get to work/uni

― gem (trisk), Thursday, 7 April 2005 14:34 (twenty years ago)

I try to get up.

― RJG (RJG), Thursday, 7 April 2005 14:35 (twenty years ago)

I am a complete bitch when I wake up. I don't even want to be bothered with masturbation.

― Je4nne ƒury (Jeanne Fury), Thursday, 7 April 2005 14:36 (twenty years ago)

i'm a morning person. i am usually in a tops mood when i get up! pretty much everyone i know loathes me for it.

― gem (trisk), Thursday, 7 April 2005 14:37 (twenty years ago)

a gf from several years ago had morning breath that smelled like grape jelly. which was strange, but certainly better than my own breath.

― andrew m. (andrewmorgan), Thursday, 7 April 2005 14:39 (twenty years ago)

I am usually trying to work out what was dreams and what was actually happening during the night. I'm awful for lucid dreams and a bit of sleep industry (ie wandering to the kitchen to fetch a glass and bit of paper with which to catch the spiders I've dreamed are in my room).

― Alix with an I ? (alix), Thursday, 7 April 2005 14:40 (twenty years ago)

EETA
LOTTA
PENA
BATTA
EETA
LOTTA
PENA
BATTA
EETA
LOTTA
PENA
BATTA
WOOOO

― N. ANALHOWDY, Thursday, 7 April 2005 23:57 (twenty years ago)

"This is the least of your concerns."

― Eyeball Kicks (Eyeball Kicks), Friday, 8 April 2005 01:13 (twenty years ago)

Showering together is obviously the best solution here.

I suppose you could also get a coupla packs of those Listerine strip thingies, keep them by the bed and pop one first thing to be on the safe side.

― sugarpants: bea arthur's secret lover (sugarpants), Friday, 8 April 2005 03:26 (twenty years ago)

To carry on from where you left off, try garlic bread & a couple of mouthfuls of white lighting.

Hey presto, you’re back to the end of the night breath!

― cavern (cavern1), Friday, 8 April 2005 10:54 (twenty years ago)

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