the world's greatest drunk sandwich

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it's a toss-up for me.
last night i used my recently resurrected breville sandwich toaster, took a banana and some very good leftover homemade vanilla custard from sunday's apple crumble.
boy was this great. 1 slight reservation in that it was HOTTER THAN MOLTEN LAVA when it came out and thus quite painful.
tonight i am planning on a turkish cherry preserve and ambrosia creamed rice variant.
sadly, i think the award has to go to the very drunk friend of mine who i saw placing a steak and kidney pie between two pieces of bread a couple of years ago, though.

― stelfox, Wednesday, 13 April 2005 14:13 (twenty years ago)

Fairly bold, that last option.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 14:20 (twenty years ago)

I used to leave a club in Milan (whose name, thankfully, escapes me now) years ago and order the following sandwich from a guy who had what we Americans call a roach coach and who made a small fortune from all the drunk club kids who were starving at 3 am.

Panino Primavera

French Roll seasoned with oil, vinegar, salt, pepper
Ham or prosciutto
Tomato (He always used lovely ripe, red ones) seasoned with oregano and celery seed
Mozarella di buffala

This was grilled on a sandwich grill for what felt like an eternity but when you finally got it and took a bite, it was heaven. I have ahd more exotic and more interesting but I remember this because it was so simple and yet the ingredients were always excellent, the preparation had been perfected and in the throes of late night hunger, it was exactly what I desired. I actually still dream about this sandwich sometimes and I mean dream as in I have dreams where I am at his truck ordering it. This leads to the some very sad awakenings.

― M. White (Miguelito), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 14:28 (twenty years ago)

that sounds nice michael, but crucially nice at pretty much any time. drunk sandwiches need to be the kind of think you would only ever think of concocting while bladdered.

― stelfox, Wednesday, 13 April 2005 14:31 (twenty years ago)

Two slices of leftover pizza, hot or cold, slapped together, toppings-side inwards.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 14:37 (twenty years ago)

I used to make 'mexican porridge' when drunk -- a quart of blueberries in extra-hot salsa. Much, much, much better than it sounds.

― Remy (x Jeremy), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 14:41 (twenty years ago)

Queso Fresco + Salsa Fresca + Flour Tortilla + a quick trip to the fry pan = Quesadilla de AWESOME

― Dan M. (OutDatWay), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 14:44 (twenty years ago)

One time when I was borderline sickly drunk, wobbly and deathly pale, my then-girlfriend presented me with a great sick-taking-away surprise: a grilled peanut butter and bacon sandwich. It pretty much SAVED MY LIFE that night.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 14:48 (twenty years ago)

Qusadillas are exactly the kind of thing that I would only make drunk. Especially the ones where, for lack of anything else, you spread goat cheese and sprinkle parmesan on the tortilla, inexpertly slice up some salami, and dig out the last of the sun dried tomatoes in oil. Incidentally, the one good thing I have to say about electric ranges is that they are ideal for making quesadillas as my younger brother pointed out once when we had a mammoth case of the munchies.

― M. White (Miguelito), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 14:55 (twenty years ago)

Has anyone else ever made a quesadilla with PB instead of cheese? A peanutbutterdilla? I did. With banana slices in it. It was good. I wasn't drunk though, but rather, extremely high. Like, giggletits high.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 15:02 (twenty years ago)

M. White, you are so posh. My drunk quesadillas typically include cheddar, maybe some pepperjack if we have some, green olives, vegetarian ham if we have some, and hot sauce. COOKED IN THE BROILER and then folded over.

― n/a (Nick A.), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 15:05 (twenty years ago)

chunks of brazilian spiced steak meat (yoinked from roommate's work) heated up in the skillet and put on thick buttery focaccia-like bread spread with cream cheese. it was damn good.

― andrew m. (andrewmorgan), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 15:05 (twenty years ago)

Note: my drunk quesadillas are very similar to my sober quesadillas.

― n/a (Nick A.), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 15:06 (twenty years ago)

i'm usually too lazy/worried about injury to operate the stove or a knife or even the bread box when i'm very drunk.

― lauren (laurenp), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 15:08 (twenty years ago)

I'm with lauren. And when/if I order food (assuming I'm capable of making myself understood), I often 'fall asleep' while waiting for it, and am woken by the doorbell when they get there, whereupon I deposit said food on the counter and go back to sleep.

― luna (luna.c), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 15:10 (twenty years ago)

forcing yourself to cook up something decent is sometimes a good way to sober up a bit for bed. but yes, it can also be a very dangerous undertaking.

― andrew m. (andrewmorgan), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 15:10 (twenty years ago)

i've passed out so many times waiting for food to arrive, and once i didn't remember waking up and collecting it. the next day, i was like "wtf, why are there san loco nachos on the coffee table".

xpost - my friend burned up half his apt building in an ill-advised late-night hash brown adventure.

― lauren (laurenp), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 15:13 (twenty years ago)

so far the meat pie between two pieces of bread is still way out in front

― stelfox, Wednesday, 13 April 2005 15:13 (twenty years ago)

I'm actually more likely to pass on late night eating since it messes up my sleep or keep it to a pickle or fruit. I once finished a jar of tom olives and had to explain myself in the morning.

Vegetarian Ham!? Definitely against my religion.

― M. White (Miguelito), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 15:16 (twenty years ago)

Oh I wouldn't cook if I were seriously fucked up, but I don't typically get that drunk, just drunk enough to get that booze-hunger and make some drunk quesadillas.

― n/a (Nick A.), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 15:16 (twenty years ago)

from 2 nights ago:
hot dogs on buns but we had no condiments but my roommate had cooked up a pot of shells-n-cheese so on the hot dogs it went.

― andrew m. (andrewmorgan), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 15:19 (twenty years ago)

The mixed kebab platter I had at the Zaytoon's in Temple Bar in Dublin hit the spot rather nicely, though I was more tipsy than drunk.

― o. nate (onate), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 15:22 (twenty years ago)

leftover bolognese sauce grilled with melted cheese on top is pretty amazing, too, but i'd eat that sober. in actual fact it's only a bit like a classier sloppy joe, so not even slightly mental for americans.

― stelfox, Wednesday, 13 April 2005 15:33 (twenty years ago)

I think I might have had a drunk Mars Bar and cheese toastie once. Definitely Mars Bar, peanut butter and banana.

― Archel (Archel), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 15:36 (twenty years ago)

i think the award has to go to the very drunk friend of mine who i saw placing a steak and kidney pie between two pieces of bread

You've not heard of the pie sarnie?

― David Merryweather (DavidM), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 15:46 (twenty years ago)

If you wrapped the pie sarnie in a tortilla, covered it in bolognese sauce and cheese, popped that in the broiler, and served it with salsa then I might respect it as crazy drunk sandwiches go.

― M. White (Miguelito), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 15:51 (twenty years ago)

Definitely Mars Bar, peanut butter and banana.

that actually sounds good

― stelfox, Wednesday, 13 April 2005 16:12 (twenty years ago)

I often wonder if the guy/lady who invented the reuben was pissed when he/she did so.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 16:17 (twenty years ago)

It just seems like one of those desperate "well, what all is there in the kitchen? slap it together!" sandwich notions that just happened to work.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 16:17 (twenty years ago)

please explain reuben

― stelfox, Wednesday, 13 April 2005 16:18 (twenty years ago)

Oh okay! A reuben is sliced corned beef, swiss cheese, sauerkraut, and 1000 island dressing on rye bread. Hot.

I'm hoping 1000 island dressing is something vaguely familiar, because it's not something I can easily explain. It's pink and a little too sweet.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 16:26 (twenty years ago)

the reuben is such a waste of a perfectly good corned beef & swiss on rye.

― jody the country girl doll (Jody Beth Rosen), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 16:32 (twenty years ago)

(and if the corned beef is juicy enough you don't even NEED the swiss!)

― jody the country girl doll (Jody Beth Rosen), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 16:33 (twenty years ago)

corned beef + swiss = severely goyish.

― lauren (laurenp), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 16:35 (twenty years ago)

yup

― jody the country girl doll (Jody Beth Rosen), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 16:37 (twenty years ago)

Reubens are great. My favorite drunk sandwiches are from Cooter Brown's in NOLA--the Radiator Special (fried shrimp, fried oysters, a huge amount of melted cheddar cheese on a po boy loaf) and the Cooter Dog (giant hot dog, grilled, with chili, cheese and sauerkraut on a po boy loaf).

Homemade, I'll do an everything quesadilla. The key to drunken goodness however, is using Thai sweet chili sauce (the kind used for spring rolls) all over it, along with either Sriracha or Crystal hot sauce.

― adam (adam), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 16:40 (twenty years ago)

Good thing I too am severely goyish.

― adam (adam), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 16:40 (twenty years ago)

Cheddar, onion and black pepper between two corn tortillas, toasted to make a quesadilla, eaten with Indian sweet mango pickle on the side.

― Jay Vee (Manon_70), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 16:42 (twenty years ago)

there's that scene in fast times... when judge reinhold and the other fast food guy are comparing "secret sauce" recipes.
what's yours?
thousand island. what's yours?
mayonnaise and ketchup.

something like that.

― andrew m. (andrewmorgan), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 16:43 (twenty years ago)

all the classic drunik sammiches i have made are distant memories.

i like a bag of combos, ice-tea and a bong load at the end of my drunik nights

― kephm, Wednesday, 13 April 2005 16:43 (twenty years ago)

I am a fan of the french dip when I'm hammered. I dunno why, but the salt is u&k.

― luna (luna.c), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 16:51 (twenty years ago)

oh man a french dip sounds U&K right now

― jody the country girl doll (Jody Beth Rosen), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 16:54 (twenty years ago)

picture of guy in helmet eating big hamburger

― charleston charge (chaki), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 16:58 (twenty years ago)

my dad ate ketchup sandwhiches as a kid and made me try one when i was a kid. 2 pieces of white bread. liberal with the ketchup between. he didn't get drunk and eat them though. i think it was just his country boy upbringing. he also ate tomatoes off the vine like an apple.

― andrew m. (andrewmorgan), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 16:58 (twenty years ago)

i like plain tomato sandwiches on pepperidge farm sandwich white. not when drunk, though.

― lauren (laurenp), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 17:00 (twenty years ago)

he also ate tomatoes off the vine like an apple.

Oh, I do this. How can you NOT?

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 17:04 (twenty years ago)

Nutella + Ham = IT WORKS!!!1

― dog latin (dog latin), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 17:46 (twenty years ago)

I still eat ketchup sandwiches sometimes.

― luna (luna.c), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 17:54 (twenty years ago)

tomato + cheddar cheese + thyme + salt + pepper + english muffin + broiler + mustard

2 things must be sliced, 1 thing must be fork-split, but that's it.

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 17:55 (twenty years ago)

he also ate tomatoes off the vine like an apple.

Nothing makes me happier than this. Especially if there's basil growing nearby.

― M. White (Miguelito), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 17:58 (twenty years ago)

FALAFEL SANDWICH

― Zebra, Alpha Go! (cprek), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 18:00 (twenty years ago)

LA ppl, where is the love for TOMMYBURGERS?

― jody the country girl doll (Jody Beth Rosen), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 18:39 (twenty years ago)

My roommate and I often grill salami, cheese, and jalapeno sandwishes on the George Foreman when we get home drunk, but I still think the winner my be the highly delicious and inauthentic Ruben at Jimmy's Woodlawn Tap in Chicago. Especially when served to you by one of the surlier bartenders.

― Fa Fa fa FA, Fa fa Fa fa FA Fa (poop), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 19:01 (twenty years ago)

Um, "sandwiches," not "sandwishes." Actually, scratch that. "Sandwishes." They're awesome.

― Fa Fa fa FA, Fa fa Fa fa FA Fa (poop), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 19:01 (twenty years ago)

Um, "Reuben." It's been a bad day for typing.

― Fa Fa fa FA, Fa fa Fa fa FA Fa (poop), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 19:02 (twenty years ago)

The love for Tommy's is right here in the extra 10 pounds I've gained in the last two months, jbr. So. Fucking. GOOD.

― luna (luna.c), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 19:23 (twenty years ago)

Yay the burger of Tommy!

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 19:23 (twenty years ago)

STARTER FOR TEN: Which prominent ilxer once ate a 'sandwich' comprised of mashed potato between two steaks?

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 20:37 (twenty years ago)

I approve wholeheartedly of the steak and kidney pie between two slices of bread thing. The problem with pies is that they are generally pretty tricky to eat with your hands and the bread might actually make that easier.

Steak and kidney pie in a BAP... now you're talking.

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 20:41 (twenty years ago)

my dad ate ketchup sandwhiches as a kid and made me try one when i was a kid. 2 pieces of white bread. liberal with the ketchup between.

Ketchup sandwiches, yeah of course. As kids this was the snack we would (could) make for ourselves. During long hot summer holidays - and nobody's parents ever ever seemed to be around - we would pile into someone's kitchen and get the white sliced loaf and sauce out, bosh bash, wash 'em down with orange cordial. Once we went for the HP Sauce option but it was a step too far, so back to ketchup it was.

― David Merryweather (DavidM), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 20:45 (twenty years ago)

Oh man, the charlton lido turned me on to bacon sandwiches with HP sauce on white bread. this has got to reign supreme. it does involve a token Actual Cooking component which may disqualify it, but i defy anyone to find something more satisfying to a drunk stomach, especially if accompanied by a brewed PG Tip.

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 20:53 (twenty years ago)

You're right there.

― David Merryweather (DavidM), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 20:56 (twenty years ago)

Luna, a french dip is just a less tasty version of italian beef. Come to Chicago already.

― ()ops (()()ps), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 21:38 (twenty years ago)

tracer OTM

― cozen (Cozen), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 21:39 (twenty years ago)

I have eaten a cheese and onion pie in a bap before,that's some good eats.

We just had simple cream cheese on bagel, but then we're not drunk, merely high on a glorious red wave.

Back in college I always used to do microwave jacket potatoes when getting in from clubbing, loads of butter, cheese and baked beans

― Porkpie (porkpie), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 21:45 (twenty years ago)

I know the thread title has sandwich in it, but the best drunk food I made was some sort of frozen Chinese dish on potato waffles. mmmmmmm

― cavern (cavern1), Thursday, 14 April 2005 14:22 (twenty years ago)

Which prominent ilxer once ate a 'sandwich' comprised of mashed potato between two steaks?

I'm guessing J. Bl0unt.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Thursday, 14 April 2005 14:30 (twenty years ago)

one month passes...

when i woke up this morning (still drunk), i thought it was a very good idea to put wasabi peas on my peanut butter sandwich

― strng hlkngtn, Saturday, 21 May 2005 20:45 (twenty years ago)

jesus lord.

― s1ocki (slutsky), Saturday, 21 May 2005 21:19 (twenty years ago)

no wonder you have that nuevo cuisine show.

― s1ocki (slutsky), Saturday, 21 May 2005 21:19 (twenty years ago)

how i made it through a full work day today is quite the mystery

― strng hlkngtn, Saturday, 21 May 2005 21:45 (twenty years ago)

eight months pass...

Tortilla + cheese + chilli sauce + microwave = high-speed quesadilla = drunk sandwich heaven

― Colonel Poo (Colonel Poo), Sunday, 5 February 2006 03:02 (twenty years ago)

Chocolate spread on one slice of bread. Lemon Curd on t'other. Place in Sandwich Toaster. Badda bing badda boom: the world becomes a better place.

― uptoeleven (uptoeleven), Sunday, 5 February 2006 22:19 (twenty years ago)

i later made a variation on the peanut butter + wasabi peas with bacon. the outcome was...not pleasant.

― james van der beek (dubplatestyle), Sunday, 5 February 2006 22:30 (twenty years ago)

The greatest drunk cheese on toast in the world is achieved by spreading a generous ammount of encona hot pepper sauce on the lightly toasted bread before grilling commences. I once ate six of them in a sitting.

― chap who would dare to be slightly tipsy on the internet (chap), Sunday, 5 February 2006 23:06 (twenty years ago)

Friday night I had mustard, cold haggis and roast taters, mayo, rocket. It rocked.

― East from the city and down to the cave (noodle vague), Sunday, 5 February 2006 23:15 (twenty years ago)

The banana and custard breville sammich in the first post sounds so omg delish, and I dont even like sweet foods much.

― Trayce (trayce), Sunday, 5 February 2006 23:23 (twenty years ago)

The answer is obviously a souvlaki.

― S- (sgh), Monday, 6 February 2006 00:50 (twenty years ago)

Is that technically a sammich tho? ;)

― Trayce (trayce), Monday, 6 February 2006 00:57 (twenty years ago)

from NY Times today:

"Mr. Meyers segued into "the morning-after sandwich," best described as going to bed with a half-eaten sandwich that's still in your hands when you wake up."

― Thea (Thea), Monday, 6 February 2006 01:12 (twenty years ago)

two weeks pass...

In about twenty minutes I will be eating a wrap filled with french fries, mozzarella cheese, and ketchup. I will grill the wrap in a George Foreman grill until the tortilla gets crispy.

― fields of salmon (fieldsofsalmon), Sunday, 26 February 2006 07:37 (twenty years ago)

that sounds completely amazing.

i usually stick to a grilled cheese and fries. there's something kinda bland, normal and wholesome about it that gets me out of the "drunk" frame of mind.

― J.D. (Justyn Dillingham), Sunday, 26 February 2006 08:07 (twenty years ago)

It was. And now I know that french fries can be used instead of chicken in most recipes.

― fields of salmon (fieldsofsalmon), Sunday, 26 February 2006 08:35 (twenty years ago)

The answer is obviously a souvlaki.
-- S- (gen.nuisanc...), February 6th, 2006 11:50 AM.
Is that technically a sammich tho? ;)

-- Trayce (spamspanke...), February 6th, 2006 11:57 AM.

As Americans refer to the burgers at McDonalds and the like as 'sandwiches', I think I'm well within my right to big up the humble souva as the greatest drunk sandwich ever. 'Cause honestly, how often would you eat it unless not hammered?

Also it was called a 'lamb sandwich' on that fairly recent Carlton Draught advert.

― S- (sgh), Monday, 27 February 2006 03:12 (twenty years ago)

i definitely support the classification of souvlaki as the premier drunken sanger. i would certainly not eat one were i not legless. and there really is nothing classier than waking up with a roaring hangover and looking at last night's attire (which potentially is still on your person) to find that it has sour cream/garlic sauce dribbled all over the front of it.

― gem (trisk), Monday, 27 February 2006 03:22 (twenty years ago)

awesome.

― electric sound of jim (and why not) (electricsound), Monday, 27 February 2006 03:40 (twenty years ago)

My alma mater's one true gift to the world:

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,129425,00.html

― Abbadavid Berman (Hurting), Monday, 27 February 2006 03:54 (twenty years ago)

grease trucks in new brunswick, fat sammiches.
fries, mozzarella sticks, bacon, chicken fingers and more in endless variations. (including hamburgers, pizza sauce, jalapenos, etc etc.)

― Special Agent Gene Krupa (orion), Monday, 27 February 2006 03:58 (twenty years ago)

my jersey friends have made me well aware of the rutgers grease trucks.

― Autonomous University of Zacatecas (Jody Beth Rosen), Monday, 27 February 2006 03:59 (twenty years ago)

they are holy objects, for use in certain sacred late-night rituals.

― Special Agent Gene Krupa (orion), Monday, 27 February 2006 04:36 (twenty years ago)

I admit to having really liked the Fat Darrell at one time. The Grease Trucks also made a mean Chicken Kebab sandwich (all of the owners being Lebanese and whatnot), which is really my favorite drunk/non-drunk sandwich.

― Abbadavid Berman (Hurting), Monday, 27 February 2006 04:40 (twenty years ago)

This photo is mildly disturbing and I'm not sure why:

http://www.foxnews.com/images/135373/0_21_fat_darrell.jpg

― Abbadavid Berman (Hurting), Monday, 27 February 2006 05:05 (twenty years ago)

I just ate a spaghetti and pesto sauce filled wrap, grilled in the George Foreman grill until crispy and THEN garlic butter applied to the outside of the wrap.

It was like garlic toast with the pasta entrée neatly arranged inside!

― fields of salmon (fieldsofsalmon), Tuesday, 28 February 2006 23:01 (twenty years ago)

one year passes...

I just made the biggest drunk sandwich.

Cheese, tomato, lettuce, jalapenos, gherkins, crisps and tomato ketchup. I went to the fridge to get some salad cream and, only when I was holding it upside down over the sandwich, did I realize it was, in fact, milk. Ruined. I now go to bed hungry.

― melton mowbray, Tuesday, 27 November 2007 02:49 (eighteen years ago)

Just rounds and rounds and rounds of toast with tons, tons of butter and tons, tons of marmite. More toast, butter and marmite than you have eaten in the two months preceding the drunken episode.

― ljubljana, Tuesday, 27 November 2007 02:56 (eighteen years ago)

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