Do others' opinions affect your enjoyment of a thing?

xpost, but that's just being made aware of your own opinions, isn't it? That doesn't count.

What was it exactly that made you change your mind about Man Bites Dog?

I tend to be influenced by other people if what they are saying indicates allusions or ramifications that I would not otherwise have thought about but are valid, but usually I will fight to the death to defend something (though I suppose if I don't like it enough initially to do this I may be swayed from 'oh, it's okay' to 'hmm, maybe it is a bit crappy').

I don't think there's anything wrong with that; in fact, I think I could really do with adapting that kind of attitude in my own life. I mean, I let other people's opinions affect me way too much sometimes -- not to where I'd give up liking something, but rather that I'd either try to keep that liking under wraps or I'd constantly deliver apologies for liking whatever it is that I like. Like... ok, those of you who keep up with TITTWIS might find this repetitive, but I'm constantly feeling like I should feel some shame or sheepishness about liking Howard Jones' music. Which I do. I don't consider myself a "fan" because I haven't (in my opinion) listened to enough of his music to do that, but I know I like the singles and at least two full-length albums of his (Human's Lib and Dream Into Action). And right now, it is taking me all my might not to deliver an immediate apology for that.

So -- how does one get to a point where other people's opinions don't seem to really matter? Especially when one is craving outside approval from others because of the dire lack of same in the past? Like, for example, I felt ridiculed and despised from every corner I turned for well over ten years of my Duran fanhood, so now every single negative review or negative opinion really stings, really sticks to me, because it got to a point where I felt like I would have to be in a constant state of battle with The Outside to get my fanhood accepted. And I really don't feel like I've gotten enough of the positivity in the last couple of years to even begin to make up for the decade-plus stretch of negativity and complete dismissals and being shut out from feeling vital and respected, or at least understood.

But anyway, I think I'm getting back to relying an incredible lot on others' opinions, but not in a way that would change my OWN opinion about whatever aspect of pop culture is being focused in upon. Rather, other peoples' opinions affect and change the way I view/feel about MYSELF. Because as hard as I try to immerse myself in the already-established-to-be-cool, the things that get rave reviews and AREN'T looked down upon, I always return to what others might consider embarrassing or "bad", because that to me is like returning home, being my own authentic self. And after wearing the thick, armor-like costume of someone who might actually be considered "cool" because she likes cool stuff, my tired being craves that return to the light, airy nightgown of what is my authentic self.

Is it intellectually mature to hate a band's fans?