a friend of mine always talks nastily about other friends of ours to me and i now know she talks about me to other mutual friends

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just wondering - obv everyone talks about their friends to other friends, and about others in peer groups, but this time of thing, where its kinda moaning, but kinda spiteful really, and a bit mean, isnt really on. or is it? this friend who says the not nice things has a habit of kinda being really chummy with someone for a certain period of time then suddenly kinda 'dropping' them - not totally stopping contact but suddenly keeping contact really really minimal, which is kinda weird itself. i know shes a nice person underneath, but im not sure i wanna be friends with someone who i know has said cruel things about to me to others. and i dont know why another friend of mine, who she has said these things to, still wants to be friends with her. hope this isnt too confusing.

― sexless, Sunday, 3 July 2005 18:49 (nineteen years ago)

yes

― dahlin (dahlin), Sunday, 3 July 2005 18:51 (nineteen years ago)

Seconded.

― C J (C J), Sunday, 3 July 2005 18:52 (nineteen years ago)

don't ever try living in ireland

― fcuss3n, Sunday, 3 July 2005 19:05 (nineteen years ago)

no. stay friends, just beware of how they are, and dont expect too much

its ok to have friends of differing levels

― charltonlido (gareth), Sunday, 3 July 2005 19:38 (nineteen years ago)

this friend who says the not nice things has a habit of kinda being really chummy with someone for a certain period of time then suddenly kinda 'dropping' them

very very red flag

― rogermexico (rogermexico), Sunday, 3 July 2005 19:42 (nineteen years ago)

does she also dip dirty tampons in your mayonnaise?
crimson flag, that

― dahlin (dahlin), Sunday, 3 July 2005 19:59 (nineteen years ago)

Keep her and continue being cordial with them, then spread all of her business in the street like unwanted laundry.

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Sunday, 3 July 2005 20:27 (nineteen years ago)

There are a few people like this at work that I stay "friendly" with, so that when I want to tell other people stuff without saying it to their face, I can just tell someone "confidentially", knowing that they'll pass it on within minutes.

Morally, this is probably a bit dubious. I figure I'm not getting into heaven anyway.

― Tech Support Droid (ForestPines), Sunday, 3 July 2005 20:35 (nineteen years ago)

i know shes a nice person underneath

No, she's not.

― Rock Hardy (Rock Hardy), Sunday, 3 July 2005 21:07 (nineteen years ago)

A) Grow some nads.
B) Tell her to choke on 'em.

― Je4nne ƒur¥ (Je4nne Fury), Sunday, 3 July 2005 21:11 (nineteen years ago)

This is why I want to buy Je4nne a drink someday.

― Rock Hardy (Rock Hardy), Sunday, 3 July 2005 21:14 (nineteen years ago)

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a friend of mine always talks nastily about other friends of ours to me and i now know she talks about me to other mutual friends - should i part ways?