What do you do? WHAT DO YOU DO?

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So you've really got to crap, and your walking down the street and run into a Borders to take care of business. You make it to the bathroom in time, and sit down and let'er rip. Then, you notice that there is not TP in the stall, and there is no one in the adjacent stall to pass some squares over. And there are no paper towels, just a stupid hand dryer, so you can't crab walk to the sink. WHAT DO YOU DO?

Face with this situation a few weeks ago, I went through my bag to see if I had anything resembling TP. The only thing I had was copies of my resume on that super nice resume paper. It would have to do. It wasn't the best wipe I've ever had, but it got the job done. And I sort of enjoyed the symbolism of it all.

― Jeff-PTTL (Jeff), Wednesday, 6 July 2005 16:23 (twenty years ago)

there is no one in the adjacent stall to pass some squares over.

you lost me here, you sick fuck.

― eat my replacement (nordicskilla), Wednesday, 6 July 2005 16:28 (twenty years ago)

I would possibly consider washing up, going to the coffee area, grabbing about 90 napkins, and returning to the commode to Finish The Job.

― David R. (popshots75`), Wednesday, 6 July 2005 16:29 (twenty years ago)

Nordicskilla needs to chilla.

― David R. (popshots75`), Wednesday, 6 July 2005 16:29 (twenty years ago)

I call someone on my cellphone.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Wednesday, 6 July 2005 16:32 (twenty years ago)

Not to chat, but, you know, for reinforcements.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Wednesday, 6 July 2005 16:32 (twenty years ago)

Wait, assuming there's no one else in the bathroom, why couldn't you flush, zip up, and then slip into the next stall?

― jaymc (jaymc), Wednesday, 6 July 2005 16:36 (twenty years ago)

Possibility. This is why I like having you around j, you think outside the stall.

― Jeff-PTTL (Jeff), Wednesday, 6 July 2005 16:37 (twenty years ago)

haha

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Wednesday, 6 July 2005 16:37 (twenty years ago)

Hell, why zip up? Get some dangle time in there while you're at it.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Wednesday, 6 July 2005 16:38 (twenty years ago)

See, if you were a girl you could have left your knickers round your thighs, but higher than the hem of your skirt, and casually walked into the next cubicle and nobody would have been any the wiser.

― Mädchen (Madchen), Wednesday, 6 July 2005 16:39 (twenty years ago)

http://badgas.co.uk/misc/toothbrush.jpg

― YOU DO THISSSSSS, Wednesday, 6 July 2005 16:42 (twenty years ago)

that photo is DISGUSTUNG. That said, use a seat cover for paper - it does the trick nicely & also, NO MATTER HOW BAD YOU HAVE TO GO...ALWAYS - I REPEAT - A L W A Y S !!! check the roll before you sit! Rule #1 of the bathroom. Duh!

― Wiggy (Wiggy), Wednesday, 6 July 2005 16:57 (twenty years ago)

this happened to me once in a porcelain-hole-in-the-ground type bathroom, there was really no other option. i ripped pages out of my journal.

― Maria (Maria), Wednesday, 6 July 2005 17:03 (twenty years ago)

Wait, assuming there's no one else in the bathroom, why couldn't you flush, zip up, and then slip into the next stall?

This is the obvious solution.

― giboyeux (skowly), Wednesday, 6 July 2005 17:04 (twenty years ago)

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