That's not for children! Things you weren't allowed to play with

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A workmate has just recounted a story about her fiances grandparents. They had a swimming pool in their garden but didn't allow the four grandsons to use it. The grandfather went as far as to put chemicals in the pool so that if the boys sneaked a swim when he wasn't about they developed an itchy rash. The old codger was a sergeant major type and pretty strict with it, but imagine going to those lengths!

It made me remember my great aunt Irene, who had a huge rocking horse at the bottom of the stairs in her house. It was just screaming out for a kid to hop up onto the saddle and have a shot but Aunt Irene was a crabbit old bitch and we weren't allowed. Ever.

Aunt Margaret had a brass gong in her hallway. Can you imagine the temptation? Again, I never got the chance to bash it. Not even the once.

Great Granny Morgan was the opposite - she allowed me to bring all of her delicate china ornaments out of the display cabinet and spend hours playing with them 'while the grown ups talked'.

I grudge never having a shot of that bloody horse though, I feel that part of my childhood has been irretrievably lost!

Anyone else have relatives like that?

― Rumpie, Monday, 11 July 2005 15:15 (twenty years ago)

I was allowed to play with just about anything, but we did have a grown up living room that kids weren't allowed to enter.

My mom, however, loved telling us stories from her horrible childhood. She only had one doll, but wasn't allowed to play with it. It was literally tied to a tiny rocking chair so she couldn't pick it up!

― Sarah McLusky (coco), Monday, 11 July 2005 15:19 (twenty years ago)

You could have so easily hit the gong and said you'd tripped.

― tissp! (the impossible shortest specia), Monday, 11 July 2005 15:20 (twenty years ago)

i was fascinated by the big bulky calculator and by the electric typewriter, but in both cases "it's not a toy."

― lauren (laurenp), Monday, 11 July 2005 15:27 (twenty years ago)

The record player. This had something to do with me being suspected of eating the lead counterweight when i was quite small and having to be taken to the doctors to find out if i had. I can't remember if i had or not. Anyway, after that my father made sure i didn't touch the record player, though sometimes I would stand very near it and watch the orange light and enjoy it spinning, whilst making sure that no part of me touched it. To this day I am very nervous around a stylus.

― Raston Warrior Robot (alix), Monday, 11 July 2005 15:33 (twenty years ago)

My Dad wouldn't let me put the needle on the record, either. As he couldn't be arsed getting up to do this for me every three minutes I was only allowed to by albums and not singles until I was 11. This is sad, but true.

― Teh HoBB (the pirate king), Monday, 11 July 2005 15:35 (twenty years ago)

My folks' house used to have a dark room. Needless to say, the photo developing chemicals were off limits to us thirsty tots.

― matlewis (matlewis), Monday, 11 July 2005 15:36 (twenty years ago)

http://homepage.mac.com/alexinnyc/.Pictures/Photo%20Album%20Pictures/2005-06-21%2016.35.09%20-0700/Image-99FE8298E2AB11D9.jpg

It's very hard keeping my little one (see above) away from the stereo, the dvd player (despite a plastic cover...which she has already infultrated), Daddy's prized CD's, the wine rack, a myriad items in both the bathroom and the kitchen. If our stereo survives this year, it'll be a miracle.

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Monday, 11 July 2005 15:38 (twenty years ago)

i was obsessed with the chunky black plastic 45 adapter for the record player, which for some reason my father let me play with. to his credit, he only blamed himself when it was no longer functional.

― lauren (laurenp), Monday, 11 July 2005 15:40 (twenty years ago)

My dad's handguns (that's okay, never had any interest) and the deck of pornographic playing cards I found one day (those were much more interesting).

― Rock Hardy (Rock Hardy), Monday, 11 July 2005 15:42 (twenty years ago)

I was't allowed to use the camera(s), which I desperately wanted to do.

― luna (luna.c), Monday, 11 July 2005 15:43 (twenty years ago)

http://photos1.blogger.com/img/199/1149/640/dan.jpg

― jaymc (jaymc), Monday, 11 July 2005 15:46 (twenty years ago)

i wasn't allowed to play with TOY guns cuz my mom was a pacifist so i had to buy one on the black market from a neighborhood toughie!! it cost 10 cents.

― jones (actual), Monday, 11 July 2005 15:49 (twenty years ago)

I wasn't allowed to play with toy guns either, until I started building my own out of Legos, at which point my parents realized it was hopeless and got me an awesome space gun that made noises.

― n/a (Nick A.), Monday, 11 July 2005 15:50 (twenty years ago)

Porn

― Candicissima (candicissima), Monday, 11 July 2005 15:55 (twenty years ago)

Do you realize, given the title, how difficult it is for me to resist ruining this thread???????????

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 11 July 2005 16:40 (twenty years ago)

I was not allowed to play with thine gentalia lest one be spanked by ye maidens of thee county.

― Esteban P. Buttez Esq., Monday, 11 July 2005 16:42 (twenty years ago)

I was never allowed to play with the neat flashlight in my mom's bedside table, either.

THANK THE GODS.

― luna (luna.c), Monday, 11 July 2005 16:43 (twenty years ago)

Lunette - "Mom? How come the flashlight in your drawer doesn't make any light? And why does it jiggle like that?"

― M. White (Miguelito), Monday, 11 July 2005 16:57 (twenty years ago)

"I think this flashlight is broken, Mama, it only makes a zzzzz noise"

― luna (luna.c), Monday, 11 July 2005 16:59 (twenty years ago)

When used properly, the light comes out of mom's eyes.

― Rock Hardy (Rock Hardy), Monday, 11 July 2005 17:02 (twenty years ago)

I was't allowed to use the camera(s), which I desperately wanted to do.

I wonder what you were planning to use them for... *giggle*

― Ian Riese-Moraine: that obscure object of desire. (Eastern Mantra), Monday, 11 July 2005 18:25 (twenty years ago)

I couldn't play with that dildo under my cousin's -- oh wait, that never happened.

― Ian Riese-Moraine: that obscure object of desire. (Eastern Mantra), Monday, 11 July 2005 18:26 (twenty years ago)

I kept getting told off for taking things apart, I used to take the motors out of cassette players, my favourite was carriage clocks, I went through loads. Oh and I managed to get the back off the washing machine.

I was only interested in seeing how stuff worked; I should have been encouraged rather than shouted at.

― not-goodwin (not-goodwin), Tuesday, 12 July 2005 13:20 (twenty years ago)

yeah, it's all fun and encouragement til yr parents come home and you've unbuilt the house, you tearaway.

― g-kit (g-kit), Tuesday, 12 July 2005 13:22 (twenty years ago)

When I was a nipper, living in the Laygate area of South Shields, I remember going into the sweet shop and picking up one of the pea shooters that were positioned on the counter, only to be told that "No you cannot have one! And I know your grandma!"

So, who did they sell them to exactly?

― mark grout (mark grout), Tuesday, 12 July 2005 13:28 (twenty years ago)

I wasn't even allowed to eat bubblegum.

― ailsa (ailsa), Tuesday, 12 July 2005 13:29 (twenty years ago)

My dad is so anal and protective of all material things in his orbit that I still am not trusted to properly handle many things. Only recently has he let me use his stereo.

― oops (Oops), Tuesday, 12 July 2005 17:16 (twenty years ago)

My grandparents were the opposite of this. My grandad had a workshop out the back of his house that contained such delights as a big vice (the kind you can put your head in), awls and knives, and weedkiller in lemonade bottles. None of it was off limits. Not even his catapult, with which we used to shoot stones at cats (or "geezers", as my grandad called them) in order to keep them off the potato plants.

The only thing he was precious about was his Encyclopedia Britannica, which was one of those ones with the exciting human anatomy pages in it. We had to wash our hands before we were allowed to take it down off the shelf.

― accentmonkey (accentmonkey), Tuesday, 12 July 2005 18:22 (twenty years ago)

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