COFFEE RAID ON MORTGAGE SALES!!!!

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I can't believe it. Our coffee machine is broken. DEAD!!! Don't they understand that IT and MI NEED coffee like most people need to ... like ... breathe?!?!?

But the coffee machine for those fat bastard mortgage brokers upstairs still works. So I did a raid. Just waiting for someone to have the nerve to ask me where the reports were. Several people looked at me askance. But I got my mochaccino.

So tell me about the vending machines and caffeine arrangements at your work. And any weird office politics that may have grown up around them.

― MIS Information (kate), Friday, 15 July 2005 07:22 (twenty years ago)

we have little automats with sandwiches & cups of ramen. the sandwiches are good.

― kingfish (Kingfish), Friday, 15 July 2005 07:24 (twenty years ago)

We have a dribbly filter thingy, but we haven't had any coffee for it for ages. My colleagues who arrive at ten, bring me a coffee from outside, by which time I'm due a second one.

― Ed (dali), Friday, 15 July 2005 07:24 (twenty years ago)

ours is always broken because idiot coworkers don't follow the very simple printed instructions next to it. luckily i only drink tea at work now.

― shine headlights on me (electricsound), Friday, 15 July 2005 07:25 (twenty years ago)

It's really good, as far as automated coffee goes. Plus, it's free.

I also discovered that the Mortgage Bastards are all so fat because they have better vending machines up there. We just have a coffee machine and a coke machine. They have vending machines with SWEETS and CRISPS and actual food in them. Humph.

― MIS Information (kate), Friday, 15 July 2005 07:26 (twenty years ago)

At what point should I start being worried about my coffee consumption?

I've cut down at home - or at least, switched the strength of my morning pot from 5 to 3. But with free, yummy coffee at the click of a button, should I start keeping track of how many I have during the day? I tend not to reallly think about mochaccino as being coffee but just a hot drink.

― MIS Information (kate), Friday, 15 July 2005 07:39 (twenty years ago)

my work starts at 11 so i don't usually need coffee. then again, it's almost 5 am, and i haven't slept yet...

― hstencil (hstencil), Friday, 15 July 2005 07:41 (twenty years ago)

http://www.pots-and-pans.co.uk/acatalog/titaniums.jpg

the above spent about 3 weeks floating around various airports before finally being delivered. it's noisy enough to drown out conversations on the other side of the office when it's working. i avoid it like the legionaire's disease it will invariable strike us all down with and stick to oxfam instant coffee made using a kettle.

― koogs (koogs), Friday, 15 July 2005 07:57 (twenty years ago)

It looks like an idol. I would bow down to it like the great and omnipotent Mocha Java!

― MIS Information (kate), Friday, 15 July 2005 07:58 (twenty years ago)

we've got a horrible little machine that charges you money but doesn't give you change, never gives you what you asked for... "erm thats soup not coffee"... everything tastes awful and looks like it was derived from carboard soaked in water- tea from a machine is not tea!

so i go and use HR's kitchen, great. real cups, real spoons, real tea and coffee... and it's free... that ain't seen me yet.....*dashes away*

― battlingspacemonkey (battlingspacemonkey), Friday, 15 July 2005 10:52 (twenty years ago)

the Gaggia Titanium (for that is His name) is currently demanding that we 'Decalcify'. which is slightly more pleasant than the usual 'Empty Dreg Drawer'.

― koogs (koogs), Friday, 15 July 2005 11:39 (twenty years ago)

Sigh. Due to there being no coffee, my entire department has gone down the pub.

I intially demured, because I thought I had a whole heap of work... but it turns out that I can't do the report that they want due to a server error.

I'm not sure I feel like lunchtime drinks, tho. I would REALLY just like more coffee.

― MIS Information (kate), Friday, 15 July 2005 11:45 (twenty years ago)

I just went for my third coffee raid today.

I feel like such a pirate when I have to sneak upstairs!

Ha-ha, maybe grizzled Navy captains will have to capture me then, and subject me to rum, sodomy and the lash, yes, yes! YES!!!!

― MIS Information (kate), Friday, 15 July 2005 13:08 (twenty years ago)

We have a Mr. Coffee in our office kitchen but I seem to be the only one who drinks coffee regularly, so if I want coffee I have to try and make like two cups of coffee so that there isn't a lot of extra coffee to throw out. Also, they got the wrong size coffee filters so before you put the filter in the machine you have to trim it down with scissors, or it will fold over and all the grounds end up in the coffee pot. So I've started pretty much just drinking coffee at home before I come to work. It's an ordeal, I tell you.

― n/a (Nick A.), Friday, 15 July 2005 13:12 (twenty years ago)

When I'm not working, two cups of coffee in the morning is more than enough to keep me going all day.

When I have to work, and get up early, and be alert, I need at least 3 extra cups during the day.

― MIS Information (kate), Friday, 15 July 2005 13:14 (twenty years ago)

drink instant coffee, and convince your brain that you have a cold. that way it won't ask so many questions about lack of flavour.

genius!

― g-kit (g-kit), Friday, 15 July 2005 13:16 (twenty years ago)

If I were a pirate, I wouldn't be drinking coffee at all. I'd be drinking grog. Whatever that is. What *is* grog, anyway?

― MIS Information (kate), Friday, 15 July 2005 13:16 (twenty years ago)

yummy. what's all this about pirates? you've flummoxized me.

― g-kit (g-kit), Friday, 15 July 2005 13:17 (twenty years ago)

Rum, Kate. Which you'll need if next up is sodomy and/or the lash.

― Markelby (Mark C), Friday, 15 July 2005 13:18 (twenty years ago)

oh wait, i see it now. arrrr.

― g-kit (g-kit), Friday, 15 July 2005 13:18 (twenty years ago)

1 pint of rum a day, to be watered 3:1, lemon or lime juice and sugar added to make grog

I'll have some of that! Oh yeah!

(Sodomy and lash to follow.)

― MIS Information (kate), Friday, 15 July 2005 13:19 (twenty years ago)

First sign that my employer was going under: they stopped buying coffee for the office coffeemaker.

― Rock Hardy (Rock Hardy), Friday, 15 July 2005 13:37 (twenty years ago)

at a previous job, the owner of the company refused to pay for coffee. "i don't drink coffee, why does anyone need to drink coffee?" he'd say in his hyper-psychopathic way whilst twitching his head this way and that. it was ridiculous. we took up a monthly collection of $5 per coffee drinker and arrange for our own machine. he was fine with this, since he didn't have to pay, of course. cheap ass.

we also had play coffee cop, cuz people who didn't pay would take from the decanter. not that we wanted to bust people, but it was like, "hey, coffee's not free, ya know."

xpost:
that's the thing, this company was literally cleaning up. growing like weeds.

― teh Nü and Impröved john n chicago (frankE), Friday, 15 July 2005 13:41 (twenty years ago)

there are numerous soda machines throughout the building, also a store and a huge cafe. you have to pay for everything though, there is nothing for free at this place.

― Lupton Pitman (Chris V), Friday, 15 July 2005 13:43 (twenty years ago)

They have vending machines with SWEETS and CRISPS and actual food in them. Humph.
-- MIS Information (masonicboo...) (webmail), July 15th, 2005 4:26 AM. (kate) (later) (link)

STOP PRETENDING

― Jon, remind me again why you haven't drowned in your own vomit (ex machina), Saturday, 16 July 2005 04:24 (twenty years ago)

AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!

The man has come to fix the coffee machine! Praise be!

No more pirated coffee.

― Rum, Sodomy and the LAN (kate), Tuesday, 19 July 2005 13:08 (twenty years ago)

Pirated tastes better.

― Truckdrivin' Buddha (Rock Hardy), Tuesday, 19 July 2005 13:12 (twenty years ago)

I bought Pirate cookies on Friday. After catching a wiff of our breath, management left us alone.

I've got a coffee machine from hell in the corner, people don't even trust it's hot chocolate making capabilities. I'd rather walk through the PATH to Tim Hortons. Or if I'm extra lazy I pull out the Metropass so I can take the short cut through the subway station.

― Rufus 3000 (Mr Noodles), Tuesday, 19 July 2005 13:19 (twenty years ago)

Kate - I was hoping you'd carry on the pirate them for the camfap!

― PinXorchiXoR (Pinkpanther), Tuesday, 19 July 2005 13:36 (twenty years ago)

I for one will be bringing a skull and crossbones if we go punting

― tissp! (the impossible shortest specia), Tuesday, 19 July 2005 13:37 (twenty years ago)

Jonathan Davis of Korn Named His Kid 'Pirate' (14 new answers)

― Dadaismus (Dada), Tuesday, 19 July 2005 13:38 (twenty years ago)

I will of course bring my pirate cap. (Not as good as Captain Anderson's hat, but still.)

I was the first person to get to the coffeemachine after it was fixed. I'm surprised there's not a queue around the office!

― Rum, Sodomy and the LAN (kate), Tuesday, 19 July 2005 13:38 (twenty years ago)

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