A crazy woman is screaming at me from outside my kitchen window demanding money for a taxi

Message Bookmarked

Bookmark Removed

Just just shrieked, "I'm calling the police! You have two minutes! (pause) One and a half minutes! (pause) You have one minute! Where's my money?"

I appeared at the kitchen window and she peered in at me, muttering, "You, you're the one who brought me here." I just shook my head and poured myself some OJ, since sleep isn't happening the rest of the morning now. She's pacing the sidewalk, muttering, "Fucking money for taxi, asshole."

― Gear! (Gear!), Saturday, 16 July 2005 14:46 (twenty years ago)

Was she good? You can tell us.

― Jimmy Mod Is Sick of Being The Best At Everything (ModJ), Saturday, 16 July 2005 14:48 (twenty years ago)

An alternate-universe you must have screwed this woman over as part of his mission to exterminate you. YOU'RE IN DANGER, RUN.

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Saturday, 16 July 2005 14:49 (twenty years ago)

she just shouted, "I'll be leaving soon, but I'll be back for your AND your wife! And that's a terrorist threat!"

― Gear! (Gear!), Saturday, 16 July 2005 14:50 (twenty years ago)

note: I am not married

― Gear! (Gear!), Saturday, 16 July 2005 14:50 (twenty years ago)

note: the crazy woman is about 4'11", 90 lbs, and 70 years old

― Gear! (Gear!), Saturday, 16 July 2005 14:50 (twenty years ago)

She could be an alien hiding in a crazy woman's body! Quick, hide the Concrete Blonde cds!!

― Scream! Scrovula, Scream! (noodle vague), Saturday, 16 July 2005 14:51 (twenty years ago)

YOUR ALTERNATE UNIVERSE WIFE IS HIDING IN THE CLOSET (her name is Roberta Kelly)

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Saturday, 16 July 2005 14:52 (twenty years ago)

DOn't open the closet... closet... closet...

― Jimmy Mod Is Sick of Being The Best At Everything (ModJ), Saturday, 16 July 2005 14:53 (twenty years ago)

How do people drink orange juice in the morning?

xpost

― carbon (carbon), Saturday, 16 July 2005 14:53 (twenty years ago)

Maybe you should report her?

― Ian Riese-Moraine: the crown prince of understatement. (Eastern Mantra), Saturday, 16 July 2005 14:53 (twenty years ago)

christ! for a second I thought you said Roberto Kelly, meaning the ex major league ballplayer. either way, now I'm paranoid and am actually going to check my closet

― Gear! (Gear!), Saturday, 16 July 2005 14:53 (twenty years ago)

brb

― Gear! (Gear!), Saturday, 16 July 2005 14:54 (twenty years ago)

How do people drink orange juice in the morning?

I prepare for it by drinking my own body-weight in booze the night before.

― Scream! Scrovula, Scream! (noodle vague), Saturday, 16 July 2005 14:54 (twenty years ago)

I'm Trapped in the Closet!! DON'T OPEN THE CLOSET!!!

― Scream! Scrovula, Scream! (noodle vague), Saturday, 16 July 2005 14:57 (twenty years ago)

well the crazy woman just screeched, "John, I know you're in there!" And my closet is empty, other than a silverfish or two.

― Gear! (Gear!), Saturday, 16 July 2005 14:57 (twenty years ago)

omg she knows your name!

― roxymuzak (roxymuzak), Saturday, 16 July 2005 15:00 (twenty years ago)

hit that shit, gear

― miccio (miccio), Saturday, 16 July 2005 15:00 (twenty years ago)

maybe she'll let you call her sophia

― miccio (miccio), Saturday, 16 July 2005 15:01 (twenty years ago)

to drown out the shrieks i'm going to play an Eno LP

― Gear! (Gear!), Saturday, 16 July 2005 15:03 (twenty years ago)

that's just what she wants you to do

― roxymuzak (roxymuzak), Saturday, 16 July 2005 15:07 (twenty years ago)

just give her the money

― kyle (akmonday), Saturday, 16 July 2005 15:21 (twenty years ago)

i'm sneakin out the back

― Gear! (Gear!), Saturday, 16 July 2005 15:22 (twenty years ago)

give her monopoly money

― sunny successor (he hates my guts, we had a fight) (katharine), Saturday, 16 July 2005 16:17 (twenty years ago)

give her your old room-mate's new address

― Sociah T Azzahole (blueski), Saturday, 16 July 2005 17:10 (twenty years ago)

You must be logged in to post. Please either login here, or if you are not registered, you may register here.