Work "Retreats"

A bong and a nudie mag?

I PREFER

1a.____Making decisions after finding out what others think.
1b.____Making decisions without consulting others.

2a.____Being called imaginative or intuitive.
2b.____Being called factual and accurate.

3a.____Making decisions about people in organizations based on available data and systematic analysis of situations.
3b.____Making decisions about people in organizations based on empathy, feelings and understanding of their needs and values.

4a.____Allowing commitments to occur if others want to make them.
4b.____Pushing for definite commitments to ensure they are made.

5a.____Quiet,thoughtful time alone.
5b.____Active, energetic time with people.

6a.____Using methods I know well that are effective to get the job done.
6b.____Trying to think of new methods of doing tasks when confronted with them.

7a.____Drawing conclusions based on unemotional logic and careful step-by-step analysis.
7b.____Drawing conclusions based on what I feel about life and people from past experiences.

8a.____Avoiding making deadlines.
8b.____Setting a schedule and sticking to it.

9a.____Talking awhile and then thinking to myself about the subject.
9b.____Talking freely for an extended period and thinking to myself at a later time.

10a.____Thinking about possibilities.
10b.____Dealing with actualities.

11a.____Being thought of as a thinking person.
11b.____Being thought of as a feeling person.

12a.____Considering every possible angle for a long time before and after making a decision.
12b.____Getting the information I need, considering it for a while, and then making fairly quick, firm decisions.

13a.____Inner thoughts and feelings others cannot see.
13b.____Activities and occurrences in which other join.

14a.____The abstract or theoretical.
14b.____The concrete or real.

15a.____Helping others explore their feelings.
15b.____Helping others make logical decisions.

16a.____Change and keeping options open.
16b.____Predictability and knowing in advance.

17a.____Communicating little of my inner thinking and feelings.
17b.____Communicating freely my inner thinking and feelings.

18a.____Starting with the whole picture.
18b.____Starting with the factual details available.

19a.____Using common sense and conviction to make decisions.
19b.____Using data, analysis and reason to make decisions.

20a.____Planning ahead based on projections.
20b.____Planning as necessities arise, just before carrying out the plans.

21a.____Meeting new people.
21b.____Being alone or with one person I know well.

22a.____Ideas.
22b.____Facts.

23a.____Convictions.
23b.____Verifiable conclusions.

24a.____Keeping appointments and notes about commitments in notebooks or in appointment books (including computer options) as much as possible.
24b.____Using appointment books and notebooks(including computer options) as minimally as possible (although I may use them).

25a.____Discussing a new, unconsidered issue at length in a group.
25b.____Puzzling out issues in my mind, then sharing the results with another person.

26a.____Carrying out carefully laid, detailed plans with precision.
26b.____Designing plans and structures without necessarily carrying them out.

27a.____Logical people.
27b.____Feeling people.
.
28a.____Being free to do things on the spur of the moment.
28b.____Knowing well in advance what I am expected to do.

29a.____Being the center of attention.
29b.____Being reserved.

30a.____Imagining the nonexistent.
30b.____Examining the details of the actual.

31a.____Experiencing emotional situations, discussions, movies.
31b.____Using my ability to analyze situations.

32a.____Starting meetings at a prearranged time.
32b.____Starting meetings when all are comfortable or ready.

There was a good New Yorker article about personality tests a while back that addressed this problem. I'm pretty sure it was a Malcolm Gladwell piece.

...

Yup.

I had to do this and I couldn't think what to take so I didn't. It was horrible we had to base a speech to the group about them. I picked some leaves and used those.

The best people were those who just bought something relevant to what they do at work, an aspect of their professional life which they really cared about or were interested in, like the man who talked about birds and why he decided to spend his life studying them, not jewellery left them by their dead mother or photos of children or other cringingly personal stuff. It wasn't a close enough group for all the emotion those things released. Honestly, people were crying and sobbing full out and you feel terribly upset and sorry for them but there's nothing you can do because you don;t actually know them at all.

Heh, I just used that very same picture of David Berkowitz somewhere on here just the other day.

I'm heading out to my first company retreat tomorrow. It's being held on a mountaintop about an hour's drive west of town. For the past month, I've answered "wacky" surveys with questions like "Who would play you in a movie?" (Answer: Ellen DeGeneres) and "What is your mother's maiden name?" (Answer: Really? Is this Mastercard web security or my employer?")

I'm a little fearful of the unknown. Everyone's been real vague about what goes on at these things. "We'll do some workshops. There'll be plenty of free time."

"Last year there was karoke."

Fortunately, for once, my job requires me to be partially on duty so I get to cart a laptop around. "Sorry, I can't play your rope games right now. I'm too busy uploading."

Any of you been on these retreats before? What else should I expect?

waterboarding

this sounds like hell

(xp: ref to this)

lol

Some woman I've never talked to before stopped me in the kitchen today.

"This is going to be your first retreat, right?"
"haha, Yeah. I hope there's not going to be any hazing."
"Not really."

Not really?

Have to give a presentation to the company tomorrow on how we can maximize our goals and build a better website for clients... while wearing pajamas.

waht

I keep thinking waterboarding is like boogie boarding

this has resulted in some really bad summers

Wear XXXL PJs over a suit.

what kind of consent form did you have to sign before this event?

you'll be wearing pajamas during the presentation, or during building the website? If the latter, is it akin to the crack making factory in New Jack City?

The theme of the retreat is "Election '08" and the company got divided up into ten political parties. There's Toga, Tupperware, Birthday, and mine which is, you guessed it, Pajama.

Everyone's telling me that I'm a good sport. I just have to remember to wear two pairs of underwear tomorrow. Talk about your potential power point presentations.

I mean, I guess I should be grateful that I wasn't placed on the lemon team.

does the birthday team have to be naked?
that would really enhance teambuilding.

The partners in my firm (and their spouses) went on a retreat two years ago to the Turks & Caicos. No organized activities. Just hanging out on the beach, far away from the office. It was a blast.

No spouses allowed on this trip. One of the sucky things about this.

This patio is going to look like Jonestown tomorrow m orning.

Help me.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ytuld7tRpVQ

Dance, corporate monkey! Dance, damn you! Entertain your CEO!

And you regret sometimes having to work from home....

He retreats at home... into the shower, I understand.

See if I ever photoshop anything for you again.

http://www.dvdbeaver.com/film2/DVDReviews32/a%20deliverance%20burt%20reynolds/old%20deliverance%204344.jpg

You closed the photoshop for a long time now, Rock.

Awwww. I thought the thread title was Work "Retards"... I was really curious as to what that meant and why in the world it was in quotation marks. Resolution on my monitor is too high, I should use the ctrl-+ command more often.

Sorry, *steps out*

PP didnt mention that his work retreat ended up on the news that night!!

Myers-Briggs Three-Legged Race