Have you done anything that should have gotten you murdered?

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There sure be a whole lot of motherfuckers out there that deserve to but capped in the ass!

― Korkie, Thursday, 28 July 2005 23:38 (twenty-one years ago)

i was once threatened by an employer. asked where i lived and said he was gonna come and get me

― plain ol' jaxon (jaxon), Thursday, 28 July 2005 23:42 (twenty-one years ago)

Shit. I'm as nice as pie to everyone.

― Aimless (Aimless), Thursday, 28 July 2005 23:43 (twenty-one years ago)

I received a death threat while in Jamaica in 1992. Apparently I was snorkeling a bit too close to a certain Mr. C****'s property.

― MindInRewind (Barry Bruner), Friday, 29 July 2005 00:54 (twenty-one years ago)

I wandered around Deep Ellum (club area of Dallas) for a night with $1600 in cash on me.

― milozauckerman (miloaukerman), Friday, 29 July 2005 00:56 (twenty-one years ago)

When I was in 7th grade, I stepped on a giant 9th grade skinhead's foot on my way out of the bus. I don't know how I got out of that prelude to my murder.

― Eric H. (Eric H.), Friday, 29 July 2005 00:57 (twenty-one years ago)

Dateline, college: while at a party in the middle of the woods at some guy's house who I did not know (girl x, who i had a crush on, talked me into driving to guy y's party; she had a crush on him, I discovered) I ended up getting harrassed by some really fucked up guys who were doing some sort of psychedelics. I was grabbed and repeatedly threatened with a knife and then told to walk away and never look back.
Somehow I ended up playing with these goons on a tire swing about an hour later, but at the moment (and still), I think it could've very easily have gotten out of hand quickly.

― Forksclovetofu (Forksclovetofu), Friday, 29 July 2005 01:13 (twenty-one years ago)

I pushed into someone on the subway once (making room for others) and he threatened to drag me off the train with him at his stop. If it hadn't been a full train with lots of witnesses, I'd have been a lot more worried -- it's not a neighborhood I'd want to be alone in, much less at the mercy of a big angry man. So I didn't deserve it, per se, but it could have happened.

― Laurel, Friday, 29 July 2005 03:28 (twenty-one years ago)

I was sitting in the first-floor apartment of a female friend whose physically abusive, estranged husband was banging on the door. He had recently been kicked out of the navy for fighting with his superior officer. At the time I was holding his baby girl. There was also a racial dynamic that I don't want to get into. I've never been so scared, and I have no doubt that, had he known I was there, he would have at least beaten me up. The police came and refused to do anything. It took a mutual friend to usher him home.

I have no idea what I was thinking getting involved in that situation, so in that sense I kind of deserved to be murdered. Definitely the most terrifying experience of my life.

― Super Cub (Debito), Friday, 29 July 2005 03:53 (twenty-one years ago)

a pizza delivery driver threatened me, he couldn't find my place (even though i patiently explained to them exactly how to get to my place) and left saying 'i know where you live'. Well like duh of course you know where i live, it just may take you 2 hours to find the place.

― mentalist (mentalist), Friday, 29 July 2005 04:54 (twenty-one years ago)

Eleven years ago I heard a very frightening domestic-violence-type-thing happening in the apartment next to mine, the occupants of which were unknown to me except that they listened to Ice Cube and Onyx at top volume a lot. I called 911. It turned out to be a Crips initiation gang rape. Nine people were arrested. I had to testify. I received a garbled but unmistakably threatening answering machine message, and a "get well soon" mylar party balloon was left outside my door, but nothing ever happened to me. (I also moved immediately.)

― dusted, Friday, 29 July 2005 05:01 (twenty-one years ago)

i've told panhandling crackheads in NYC, philadelphia, and newark to "get lost," "go to hell," and to "fuck off." a few of them threatened me and some even charged at me. i'm lucky that i'm alive, i think.

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Friday, 29 July 2005 05:11 (twenty-one years ago)

When I was about 13, my friends and I found a case of beer in a stream. We grabbed it and started to have a swell time with it when a bunch of bikers showed up and began looking for their stash. We hightailed it outta there without a sound.

― jim wentworth (wench), Friday, 29 July 2005 05:18 (twenty-one years ago)

lucky you didn't sneeze-fart

― gem (trisk), Friday, 29 July 2005 05:24 (twenty-one years ago)

Indeed. But maybe it could have been used as a weapon.

― jim wentworth (wench), Friday, 29 July 2005 05:28 (twenty-one years ago)

Dusted's is scariest, I think.

― paulhw (paulhw), Friday, 29 July 2005 15:11 (twenty-one years ago)

TS: Get well balloon or Grim Reaper "I'm Just Here For the Cake"

― Pleasant Plains /// (Pleasant Plains ///), Friday, 29 July 2005 16:03 (twenty-one years ago)

dusted's is way scariest. All I've done is started a couple bar fights.

― pullapartgirl (pullapartgirl), Friday, 29 July 2005 20:13 (twenty-one years ago)

i once had an unwanted prison pen pal. apparently he grew quite fond of me after we were locked in a small room together for two hours during an interview i was doing about heroin. luckily, he was in prison, and i moved to greece shortly thereafter.

― dahlin (dahlin), Friday, 29 July 2005 23:19 (twenty-one years ago)

wait a sec, dusted's thing may have been the scariest contextually, but you've got to imagine me sitting in that apartment with the angry, abusive, anger-management deficient husband banging on the door. It was palm sweating, heartbeat racing kind of scary. Real-time, suspense movie intense.

― Super Cub (Debito), Saturday, 30 July 2005 00:46 (twenty-one years ago)

NO. CRIPS GANG RAPE INITIATION = TOP 10 SCURRY THINGS THE END.

― DMB Googleplex (Matt Chesnut), Saturday, 30 July 2005 00:54 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm surprised my father never murdered me for just existing. I was always sure he would as soon as he got drunk enough and got angry over something as trivial as me dropping a fork while eating a meal.

― When an eel hits your eye like a big pizza pie, that's a moray! (Eastern Mantra), Saturday, 30 July 2005 01:38 (twenty-one years ago)

I once told a stupid bitch che couldn't drive worth a shit and she tried karate-chopping me in the throat while whe was driving horribly.

― hortence, Saturday, 30 July 2005 02:43 (twenty-one years ago)

I agree that gang-raping crips are just about the scariest thing imaginable, but dusted just heard this. he wasn't directly involved. and he didn't know it was a crip gang rape thing until well after the fact.

so i still maintain that my story is more scary in a real time sense.

(note: I recognize that this is a pathetic argument I'm making, and I don't take any pride in my unfortunate story.)

― Super Cub (Debito), Saturday, 30 July 2005 02:52 (twenty-one years ago)

after seeing Erase Errata at The End in London, walking many blocks at midnight to my sister's apt next to King's Cross. sketchy man looking vaguely like Lee Perry accosts me at King's X and follows me after i refuse to give him money, threatening me and saying "how do you know I don't have a knife? i could fucking kill you, man!" inexplicably, the best rejoinder i could come up with at the time was "no, you won't" and keeping on walking. he didn't give chase, but to this day i have never bought a single Lee Perry album.

― yuengling participle (rotten03), Saturday, 30 July 2005 02:54 (twenty-one years ago)

you should have said "how do you know i dont?"

― charltonlido (gareth), Saturday, 30 July 2005 04:02 (twenty-one years ago)

I have a general policy that if anybody asks me for my money, I'll give it to him - no matter the circumstances. But this approach may be more appropriate in the land of firearms.

― Super Cub (Debito), Saturday, 30 July 2005 04:11 (twenty-one years ago)

One time when I was really, really drunk, I made out with the girlfriend of a member of the yakuza. In front of him. He probably could've had me killed, but it turned out he was really into it.

Later I left my purse in his car with all my money and train tickets and credit cards and cell phone, but AMAZING he was really nice and the next day he drove two hours back from "working" in Tokyo to return it to me. And refused to accept any reward for this.

― Laura H. (laurah), Saturday, 30 July 2005 04:44 (twenty-one years ago)

i was with a group of people heading down to chambers st. on the N, but due to some technical problems, the train had to stop at canal st. this one dude starts FLIPPING, and when we emerge from the subway, i see him huffing up and down the street, angrily hailing a taxi, finger pointing skyward, practically GROWLING the word "TAXI!!!!" i decided that this was one of those Great New York Moments, and i'd had my camera with me, so naturally, i clicked a photo of the guy, being sure to turn the flash off so as not to draw unwanted attention to ourselves. however, we're reasonably sure that the guy saw me anyway, and he kept continuing in our direction. we all frantically pick up our pace until we hear the guy yell "SEE THAT?!! THE PEOPLE ARE WITH ME!!!" in retrospect, i probably would've slugged me if i were him. and the photo didn't even come out well.

― joseph (joseph), Saturday, 30 July 2005 06:31 (twenty-one years ago)

Got drunk, had to walk 6 miles to get home from a nightclub because I drunk my taxi fair and lost contat with all my mates. Passing through a dodgy scheme I met a bloke I remembered from school. He demanded money and cigarettes off me and I told him to fuck off. He then threatened to "weigh me in" (Scottish version of "beat me up") and I said "You think I don't remember you from school ya wee cunt? Trying to reinvent yourself as a hardman?" Next thing I'm against a wall with twin stanley blades against my throat (it was popular at the time to tape two blades together separated by a coin so that it was more difficult to stitch up any wounds). In my drunken idiocy I was still slagging the guy and he really was ready for cutting my throat, then some other guy turned up who remembered me from school and said "Leave him alone he's St3ph3n W4tt's cousin" - and that was the end of it, apologies all round. I've never been so happy to be related to a total bampot.

― Onimo (GerryNemo), Saturday, 30 July 2005 07:14 (twenty-one years ago)

Got drunk in a pub in South East London, came back from toilet to discover some local numpty had head butted my mate's girlfriend. Took it upon myself to sort everything out. I've told this guy to fuck off away from V1ck1 because she doesn't want an apology, and I was even calm enough to kep myself from getting into a fight with him. I turn round to speak to V1ck1 and next thing there's this bright flash - the guy punched me in the side of the head while my back was turned. I lost the plot and went for the guy, and ended up giving him a bit of a doing.
A few days later I went for a pint and was "summoned" to the back of the pub by this scarred up scary Irish guy who allegedly had some kind of unspeciified connections to the IRA. He was under the impression that his mate had been attacked by me and four of my mates for no reason. I put him right with what actually happened and he accepted this and said there would be no problem and even bought me a drink - I though everything was fine until he casually said "where is it you live again" and didn't seem happy with "over the far end of the town". I was followed halfway home that night and several other times over the following few weeks. I ended up taking bizarre routes home every time I went out just to shake off these guys (and the paranoia).
It all died down after a while but it was pretty scary at the time. THe guy I beat up got jailed shortly afterwards for stabbing someone six times.

― Onimo (GerryNemo), Saturday, 30 July 2005 07:24 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm against a wall with twin stanley blades against my throat

Christ. You win.

― dusted, Saturday, 30 July 2005 07:54 (twenty-one years ago)

Tripping on LSD in the wilds of southern Indiana circa 1976. As my friends and I gambol down a dusty country road, a pickup truck pulls up and stops alongside us. "What the hell are you doing on our property" asks one of the clearly perturbed dudes inside. Since these guys look to be older hippies, I start waxing rhapsodic: "hey man we're just here communing with mother nature, etc., just like you guys" and so on. After awhile the brooding longhairs grunt shake their heads and drive off into the sunset. My buddies, who've been oddly silent this whole time, explode in freakedout disbelief: "shit mark didn't you see THE SHOTGUN in that guy's lap?" well, no...

*bikers who were secretly growing teh weed on their "farm."

― m coleman (lovebug starski), Saturday, 30 July 2005 10:45 (twenty-one years ago)

being gay, and sometimes quite obviously so, i was once driving across country with a friend, had to get gas in sketchy eastern TN, a trucker called me a faggot and yelled at me, we hopped in the car and sped off, only to discover, he was following us, what ensued was about 20 minutes of the truck ON OUR ASS, brights in our face in the middle of the night in rural TN, we got off exits, he followed, we got back on, he followed, finally I guess he got bored and he left us alone but jesus if I wasn't freaked the fuck out....

― breezy, Saturday, 30 July 2005 13:02 (twenty-one years ago)

guess i didnt 'do' anything that 'shouldve' gotten me killed, but i've been mugged twice, once at huge-fucking-fisherman's-knifepoint, once at what-i-suspect-was-a-fake-gunpoint

― jermaine (jnoble), Saturday, 30 July 2005 13:03 (twenty-one years ago)

i guess i didn't really do anything other than be gay, but that seems to get people murdured all the time, both in Iran and here...(see news story of teens murdered by gov for being gay recently), we just don't get it issued by the gov here...

― breezy, Saturday, 30 July 2005 13:03 (twenty-one years ago)

yeah, Onimo wins.

― Super Cub (Debito), Saturday, 30 July 2005 13:08 (twenty-one years ago)

I have a general policy that if anybody asks me for my money, I'll give it to him - no matter the circumstances.

Did you learn nothing from Batman Begins?

― Alba (Alba), Saturday, 30 July 2005 13:14 (twenty-one years ago)

didn't see it. what should I have learned?

― Super Cub (Debito), Saturday, 30 July 2005 13:27 (twenty-one years ago)

I sort of regret saying that Onimo wins. Nobody "wins" with any of this except by not dying, and we've all gotten away alive from gay-bashers, hippie-bashers, Crips, yakuza, horrible fathers, abusive ex-husbands, and miscellanous violent shitheads. Onimo's situation sounded like the most *immediate* threat in a narrow sense. Incidentally I am female.

― dusted, Saturday, 30 July 2005 13:34 (twenty-one years ago)

Uh, I didn't mean that all of us have gotten away alive from all of those perpetrators. I can't write.

― dusted, Saturday, 30 July 2005 13:39 (twenty-one years ago)

I often think about that night, and I wonder how I got myself into that. I was pretty naive, I suppose. I can't imagine myself ending up in that situation again, as I'm in a different place in life now.

― Super Cub (Debito), Saturday, 30 July 2005 13:44 (twenty-one years ago)

gerry! i never took you for a hardman! wow

― dahlin (dahlin), Saturday, 30 July 2005 14:07 (twenty-one years ago)

several friends and i were robbed by masked intruders w/ shotguns. i'll never forget seeing that first dude come in and point the double-barrel at my face while screaming "get down on the floor." thought we were goners, just closed my eyes and waited for the bang.

― ghetty green (eman), Saturday, 30 July 2005 14:39 (twenty-one years ago)

I married a stupid bitch for which I should be shot.

― kinder, Saturday, 30 July 2005 15:38 (twenty-one years ago)

― ghetty green (eman), Saturday, 30 July 2005 16:19 (twenty-one years ago)

I sort of regret saying that Onimo wins. Nobody "wins" with any of this except by not dying,

Hey, this is the first ilx thread I've won, and all I did was get drunk and stupid and not get my throat cut!

gerry! i never took you for a hardman! wow

I'm not, one swallow doesn't make a summer and all that. Winning a fight and being followed home by crazy gangster types kind of puts you off winning any more.

― Onimo (GerryNemo), Saturday, 30 July 2005 21:32 (twenty-one years ago)

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