i made a man redundant

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and this is the story of how it happened

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:18 (nineteen years ago)

i have lived a fairly uneventful life

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:19 (nineteen years ago)

i grew up in a small town

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:19 (nineteen years ago)

and then we moved to a large town

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:19 (nineteen years ago)

and then i moved to the big city

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:19 (nineteen years ago)

intellectually i was indifferent

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:20 (nineteen years ago)

physically i was bland

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:20 (nineteen years ago)

i costumed myself in last year's fashions

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:21 (nineteen years ago)

and perfumed myself in the scent of celebrities

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:21 (nineteen years ago)

i went to college and earned a degree

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:21 (nineteen years ago)

i got a job and did what i had to

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:22 (nineteen years ago)

i met a woman and fell in love

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:22 (nineteen years ago)

i met another woman and got married

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:22 (nineteen years ago)

i met a third woman and got divorced

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:23 (nineteen years ago)

i had my hobbies and my passing interests to occupy me

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:23 (nineteen years ago)

and generally i was happy

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:23 (nineteen years ago)

until one day i got a letter in the mail

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:24 (nineteen years ago)

which read:

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:24 (nineteen years ago)

"let me introduce myself:

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:24 (nineteen years ago)

i have lived a fairly uneventful life

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:24 (nineteen years ago)

i grew up in a small town

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:24 (nineteen years ago)

and then we moved to a large town

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:25 (nineteen years ago)

and then i moved to the big city

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:25 (nineteen years ago)

intellectually i was indifferent

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:25 (nineteen years ago)

physically i was bland

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:25 (nineteen years ago)

i costumed myself in last year's fashions

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:26 (nineteen years ago)

and perfumed myself in the scent of celebrities

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:26 (nineteen years ago)

i went to college and earned a degree

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:26 (nineteen years ago)

i got a job and did what i had to

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:26 (nineteen years ago)

i met a woman and fell in love

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:27 (nineteen years ago)

i met another woman and got married

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:27 (nineteen years ago)

i met a third woman and got divorced

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:27 (nineteen years ago)

i had my hobbies and my passing interests to occupy me

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:27 (nineteen years ago)

and generally i was happy

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:27 (nineteen years ago)

until one day i got a letter in the mail

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:28 (nineteen years ago)

which read:

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:28 (nineteen years ago)

'let me introduce myself:

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:28 (nineteen years ago)

i am a private investigator

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:28 (nineteen years ago)

my name is irrelevant

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:28 (nineteen years ago)

john p. irrelevant

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:29 (nineteen years ago)

and in the process of investigating an unrelated crime

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:29 (nineteen years ago)

i appear to have uncovered a fascinating phenomenon:

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:29 (nineteen years ago)

Is there a scene in a titty bar at any point?

Frogm@n Henry, Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:29 (nineteen years ago)

two men living the exact same life, exactly one day apart

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:29 (nineteen years ago)

you, my friend, are not living your own life

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:30 (nineteen years ago)

but are instead following in the footsteps of another'

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:30 (nineteen years ago)

i was astounded

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:30 (nineteen years ago)

i balled up the letter and threw it on the floor

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:31 (nineteen years ago)

i spent days wondering what to do

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:31 (nineteen years ago)

until i decided to make contact and hope that we can resolve this issue"

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:32 (nineteen years ago)

and in the process of investigating an unrelated crime

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:34 (nineteen years ago)

i appear to have uncovered a fascinating phenomenon:

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:34 (nineteen years ago)

two men living the exact same life, exactly one day apart

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:34 (nineteen years ago)

Frogman Henry wins so far.

Pashmina (Pashmina), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:35 (nineteen years ago)

O'so Krispie is jealous. Take a pot shot at anything different because you didn't think of it first.

O'so Krispie = Jealous, Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:35 (nineteen years ago)

you, my friend, are not living your own life

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:35 (nineteen years ago)

but are instead predicting the footsteps of another"

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:35 (nineteen years ago)

i was astounded then

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:35 (nineteen years ago)

and then i was astounded later

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:35 (nineteen years ago)

when i received the epistle from the man that i had made redundant

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:36 (nineteen years ago)

Take a pot shot at anything different because you didn't think of it first.

If different = tedious then yes.

O'so Krispie (Ex Leon), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:38 (nineteen years ago)

If different = tedious then yes.
You would not like Finnegan's Wake.

Psft, Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:47 (nineteen years ago)

It was done well, not overdone.

O'so Krispie (Ex Leon), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:47 (nineteen years ago)

Come on, come on! I'm waiting for the epistle!!!!!!! I think this is cool. Please don't stop. (this is NOT sarcasm)

Cool, Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:48 (nineteen years ago)

I liked this story too, but I think it already ended (the epistle was the one he already received). A clever twist in the middle.

Tuomas (Tuomas), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:51 (nineteen years ago)

It was done well, not overdone.

Give me a break. This is already overdone, huh? Maybe you are having an emotional reaction to the multiple one-liner posts. Please adjust your underwear.

Psft, Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:52 (nineteen years ago)

I'm just bored.

I'm not emotional about it, if I was I would take the time to log out to make accusastions.

O'so Krispie (Ex Leon), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:53 (nineteen years ago)

I liked this story too, but I think it already ended (the epistle was the one he already received). A clever twist in the middle.

Oh, that's cool! And completely bonkers! I love it!!! Would make a great short film / cartoon.

Cool!, Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:53 (nineteen years ago)

I'm not emotional about it, if I was I would take the time to log out to make accusastions.

That could be a meaningful insult, but you see I never ever log in. If you're so bored, you wouldn't be here attempting to snark.

Psft, Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:55 (nineteen years ago)

Cool, the story continues! Who will be made redundant next?

Tuomas (Tuomas), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 15:03 (nineteen years ago)

Who? Is there more of him?

Cool, Tuesday, 20 September 2005 15:16 (nineteen years ago)

It's not a famine, it's a post-food society.

The Oracle of Somewhere, Tuesday, 20 September 2005 15:29 (nineteen years ago)

This was great!

Daniel_Rf (Daniel_Rf), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 15:41 (nineteen years ago)

Nicole forced to defend her nastiness for once. Huzzah!

yeah i'm logged out., Tuesday, 20 September 2005 15:44 (nineteen years ago)

wow, this is like paul auster or somehting!!!!!

RJG (RJG), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 15:47 (nineteen years ago)

If it is an original, I would actually be worried about it being "stolen." Or even just circulated via email, which I already did!

Cool, Tuesday, 20 September 2005 15:52 (nineteen years ago)

the end.

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 16:03 (nineteen years ago)

You got it in an email? Did I make my emailees redundant?

Cool, Tuesday, 20 September 2005 16:07 (nineteen years ago)

There's nothing to defend, really.

O'so Krispie (Ex Leon), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 16:08 (nineteen years ago)

There's nothing to defend, really.

Don't put yourself down, sport.

Psft, Tuesday, 20 September 2005 16:13 (nineteen years ago)

one month passes...
xpost rjg
yeah it definitely reminded me of 'city of glass'

archipelago (archipelago), Sunday, 6 November 2005 22:46 (nineteen years ago)

i liked that story.

dog latin (dog latin), Monday, 7 November 2005 00:12 (nineteen years ago)

one month passes...
18 people got made redundant yesterday, that keeps me in work for three months if things don't improve. I now have to make recommendations as to which two get new positions within the company. I feel particularly shitty about it.

Ed (dali), Friday, 16 December 2005 08:50 (nineteen years ago)

19 as of this morning.

Ed (dali), Friday, 16 December 2005 12:02 (nineteen years ago)

Argh, that's horrible. What's going on? Do you still have your job, at least?

Kate Classic (kate), Friday, 16 December 2005 12:03 (nineteen years ago)

:-((( Oh god. I hate having to sack a person. I did it once and it was totally crap.

Nathalie (stevie nixed), Friday, 16 December 2005 12:15 (nineteen years ago)

for the time being, I still have a job.

Ed (dali), Friday, 16 December 2005 12:27 (nineteen years ago)

Oh Ed, that's horrible. We had this happen at our company & I had to watch a stream of ppl being called to the MD's office. :-(

Panther Pink (Pinkpanther), Friday, 16 December 2005 12:30 (nineteen years ago)

The made one guy make his team redundant having been told that he was redundant.

Ed (dali), Friday, 16 December 2005 12:48 (nineteen years ago)

That's awful - but at least he knows that they're all in the same boat. It would be worse if he had to make them redundant thinking that he wasn't... I think. :-(

Kate Classic (kate), Friday, 16 December 2005 12:51 (nineteen years ago)

That's such a shitty situation to be in. Especially now. :-((

Nathalie (stevie nixed), Friday, 16 December 2005 13:16 (nineteen years ago)

the only time that can be worse is red nose day

ken c (ken c), Friday, 16 December 2005 13:18 (nineteen years ago)

four months pass...
http://s49.yousendit.com/d.aspx?id=1KKYE4W6JLP533KEMSA8TAFQPH

live with music. it's a big file though

sorry to hear of your troubles, ed

Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Wednesday, 3 May 2006 22:31 (nineteen years ago)

k

Confounded (Confounded), Wednesday, 3 May 2006 23:03 (nineteen years ago)

three years pass...

this is a long shot, but does anyone have the recording that was linked to here?

http://s49.yousendit.com/d.aspx?id=1KKYE4W6JLP533KEMSA8TAFQPH

live with music. it's a big file though

sorry to hear of your troubles, ed

― Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Wednesday, May 3, 2006 5:31 PM (3 years ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

congratulations (n/a), Thursday, 17 December 2009 17:10 (fifteen years ago)

this is great! also wtf @ the berks interrupting staticelectricity, that's really bad form, also annoying

like having an eternal kazoo in your underwear (acoleuthic), Thursday, 17 December 2009 17:15 (fifteen years ago)

shhh

mdskltr (blueski), Thursday, 17 December 2009 17:19 (fifteen years ago)

i never saw this thread before now.

Tracer Hand, Thursday, 17 December 2009 23:39 (fifteen years ago)

that's really bad form, also annoying

Frogman Henry's titty bar comment makes the whole thing, as far as I'm concerned.

What do you want? This ain't an egg shop (grimly fiendish), Thursday, 17 December 2009 23:41 (fifteen years ago)

my name is irrelevant

― Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Wednesday, 21 September 2005 00:28 (4 years ago)

john p. irrelevant

― Static Electricity (staticelectricity), Wednesday, 21 September 2005 00:29 (4 years ago)

my favourite ilx posts of all time

blarinet (electricsound), Thursday, 17 December 2009 23:48 (fifteen years ago)


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