A Funny Thing Happened On The Way To The Canteen

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So I'm going up to the Nielsen canteen as per usual and buying my sandwiches and suddenly a bloke taps me on the shoulder. He is the casting director for a commercial to be shot in Oxford, working with Nielsen to recruit 'real people' who look like "scientists" or "boffins".

This commercial is for Adidas' world cup campaign. I apparently look "just right" (ITS THE BEARD!) and so he photographs me and does some quick camcorder shots. If they decide to use me I could end up with:

i. The notoriety and mockery of the entire nation.

ii. Fifteen grand.

Blimey eh.

― Tom, Thursday, 3 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Even if I was 'selected' I am in two minds though, since I suspect - sports commercials not being known for their firm stand against cultural stereotypes - that they're just looking for a few geeky fat blokes to look like twats next to Beckham etc.

― Tom, Thursday, 3 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

cor blimey! TAKE THE 15 GRAND. then shave the beard off so you'll not be recognised. that way everyone's a winner!

― katie, Thursday, 3 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

heh i once appeared in an internal ad for a bank and/or building soc, courtesy good fwend who went on to be prop buyer for spice world & nil by mouth hurrah and snatch chiz chiz.

i forget which bank tho. i was (culturally stereotyped as) a.n.other rubbish banXoR manager who did not allow yr dosh to work for you. My oppo wuz a nice man who worked in Smithfield: he wuz all "why oh why" abt the decline in popularity of red meat (this = early 80s).

― mark s, Thursday, 3 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Adidas was the company responsible for those memorable "Lose the belly" ads, right?

Perhaps the follow-up is "Lose the beard".

BBT of the day - ironically, that commercial where the massive disembodied beer belly plunges into the river was shot at..... Romford Brewery.

― Trevor, Thursday, 3 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Not sure that Adidas was responsible for the lose the belly ads but I could be wrong (was it Reebok?). But the chance to star in an Adidas world cup ad is surely to grand to pass up. Their last couple of major football ads have, I think, been pretty enjoyable - especially the one filmed in Amsterdam with all the footballs and people jerking about with Becks, Zizou, Kluivert et al.

― Jonnie, Thursday, 3 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Yep, Reebok it was. There's my theory out the window!

― Trevor, Thursday, 3 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Take the money. Buy me beer! It would be AMAZING. WOWSERS!

On our way to PRET this lunchtime GOSH we were accosted by posh "Jay-C" (JC = J3an Chr15t0ph3 our BOSS) who talked at us in a posh accent and told us about his Munich trip @ New Years. WHERE HE USED EUROS! Gosh. Take the 15k as payback after eating those Taste! sammiches for AEONS.

― Sarah, Thursday, 3 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Incidentally, "bellys gonna getcha" was ULARIOUS, especially after seeing a bunch of 8yr old boys singing it UPROARIOUSLY at Raynes Park station. Yaaay!

― Sarah, Thursday, 3 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Nice one, Tom! I look forward to seeing the Beard on billboards across the country. Maybe the 'I kiss football' guy will attempt to snog you. I think that's the Adidas World Cup campaign?

― Will, Thursday, 3 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

heh! maybe with all this CGI stuff they'll get you all togged up in blue EXCEPT 4 BEARD, then they can re-use it for the famed Walking With Beards we've heard so much about.

― Alan Trewartha, Thursday, 3 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Maybe its only the beard they want! SOB!

I stress that the operative words in my post are "if" and "could". It's livened up the day anyway.

― Tom, Thursday, 3 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

I liked the I Kiss Football campaign. I saw a programme on Sonny from the ads the other week and he's a cool guy. He is a coach or something in South Africa who is trying to raise the profile of the game there. He got on extremely well with Alessandro Del Piero who seemed to be a lovely chap as well as an absolute football genius. Patrick Kluivert came across well too.

― Jonnie, Thursday, 3 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

1. bellys gonna get ya filmed near my horrible work (the car park - canal bit)

2. take the dollars

3. i was approached by a girl in spitalfields market who wanted to take pictures of me for a "japanese fashion magazine".

― gareth, Thursday, 3 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

WHEN I WAS TOO LICKLE TO EVEN SPEAK and my mother was pushing me about in a pushchair, apparently a LADY outside MOTHERCARE asked her if I could do some baby modelling because I was so cute! My mother said no. What if she had said yes! I could have been flung into the high life jet set world of supermodels! I could have got anorexia and actually got THIN from an eating disorder instead of just bad bile reflux! I could be on a jet now! Refusing food but welcoming cocaine! I coulda been a CONTENDAH!!!

Oh I was a cute baby. Whot happened o whot happened....

― Sarah, Thursday, 3 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

some girl took a photo of my bag on a central line train once. Not me, just me bag.

if I were you Tom...i'd be shouting "show me the money" and preparing for a life as a media star :)

― jel, Thursday, 3 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

you'll be on Parkinson before you know it.

― jel, Thursday, 3 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

I was too short to be an Ewok.

― Pete, Thursday, 3 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

I was on the Old Grey Whistle Test once.

― Dr. C, Thursday, 3 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

i read the weather on Tyne Tees once.

― Alan Trewartha, Thursday, 3 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

i was on the East Anglia Regional News dancing dressed as an Indian Squaw on the back of a float! to the strains of "cotton eye Joe". the shame of it all... but it was for charity your honour!

― katie, Thursday, 3 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Hell, for fifteen grand I would try growing a beard. Hope you get it Tom, that would be excellent.

― Nicole, Thursday, 3 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Tom, if this works out for you, I will be a seething ball of bitter jealousy. Then I will drink some tea.

― Dan Perry, Thursday, 3 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

I was on an episode of _Captain Kangaroo_ -- a full segment all to myself, practically! The joys of nationwide TV dominance at a young age.

To Tom -- invest the money in making FT the megaultrakickass site of the gods. Or something. Hire Simon R. as permanent commentator, etc.

― Ned Raggett, Thursday, 3 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

My mate Dave played a Volvonian in "Busty Blond and Keen", a cheap (in every sense of the word) soft porn sci-fi crime solving drama series on the now defunct Live TV channel.

I recall he was paid substantially less than fifteen gees for notoriety and mockery.

― Trevor, Thursday, 3 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

I was almost in Cry Freedom as one of Kevin Klein's amusingly unruly kids.

― Sam, Thursday, 3 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Oooh I'd almost forgotten, I was on my way to college today and i remembered I needed petrol so I turned into a (big new million pound type) housing estate to swing around and go back to the petrol station. I drove onto the kerb and was reversing back when a large jeep turned the corner and had to brake suddenly nearly hitting me, and the driver was RONAN KEATING. Of course it makes sense because he lives there, but still RONAN KEATING. NEARLY HITTING ME. its not as good as your stories admittedly.

― Ronan, Thursday, 3 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

I was an extra sitting just out of shot in "Waterland" with jermey Irons (?). I also featured in almost every episode of Sky One's "Games World", as I was the audience co-ordinator and when the Peckham borstal kids we had to get in didn't bother turning up, I had to mobilise all the make-up girls, runners etc. to cheer frantically and try and make it look like there were more than 23 people (our record low).

― Mark C, Thursday, 3 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Waterland is really good movie. Kind of a harder edged Dead Poet's Society. The backwoods abortion scene is just brutal.

― bnw, Thursday, 3 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

I tried out for extra work in Sid and Nancy but I didn't look punk enough anymore.

A friend of mine appeared in a Yellow Pages ad. I believe they came up to him in a health food store and asked him to look up something ridiculous in the phone book. He made over $30,000 off of the commercial over a couple of years. I love real people casting. Good luck, Tom!

― Arthur, Thursday, 3 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Errr... I was on 'Hold Tight' - the mid 80s, Alton Towers set, kiddie game show hosted by Bob Carolgees. I saw Toyah.
A few years back I got a letter telling me to attend an audition for a 'Major Hollywood Movie' as an extra. Bloody thing was the next morning in fancy London City and I lived miles away! So, I didn't go.

― DavidM, Thursday, 3 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

You should probably make sure that Adidas don't use sweatshops etc. first, no?

― Robin, Friday, 4 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

yes cos if you turn them down they'll never find anyone else, you'll cripple their whole company, and the moral rush will be far better than any 15 grand.

― Ronan, Friday, 4 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

*sigh* ronan, you should bottle and sell your youthful cynicism. ppl like me who are going soft in their old age would be queueing to purchase it!

― katie, Friday, 4 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

three months pass...

Did anything come of this?

― Graham, Sunday, 7 April 2002 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

No.

― Tom, Monday, 8 April 2002 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

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