Questions you've asked or been asked in interviews?

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Job interviews are hell they always ask "do you have any questions?"...So, once I said "how much time do you get off for Christmas?"...and another time I was asked "who is your favourite guitar player?", a question I was totally unprepaired for and mumbled something like "J Mascis or Dave Mustaine".

― james e l, Monday, 16 July 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

What's your work style? My work style? Fucking brilliant, innit?

― Mike Hanle y, Monday, 16 July 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

I've never had a weird job interview, honestly. The closest was I had to assure everyone involved that I didn't normally look so shit.

― Ally, Monday, 16 July 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Did a phone interview with someone from worldpop once and he asked each question from a pack of lovehearts sweets. So the first question was "Who's Your Perfect Love?" and then the second question was "Who's got an angel face?". Sinking into confused desperation I said "er.. Stephen Fry?"

I love the SVS questionnaire where they asked "What's your favourite kitchen utensil" and my bassist Tim wrote "girlfriend". Kate was gonna kick his butt.

― chris, Monday, 16 July 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

The SVS questionaire was collected from the stupidest questions that we ever got asked in interviews, that was sort of the point of it. ;-)

I don't actually think "What is your favourite kitchen utensil" was even the silliest... gah, sorry, brain eaten, I'll have to check the Lollies website to tell what the stupidest was, because my memory is the size of a pea. The question we get asked the most *often* is always "Do you encounter much sexism?" to which I *always* want to reply "Do you ask bands made of boys this question? So surely, the fact that everyone asks *us* this means it's a sexist question?"

Oh, yes! "What are the current odds being given by British tabloids that Prince Charles will marry a black woman?" That was definitely the most off the wall and just plain "WTF?" weird question. Our whole Discorder interview was pretty high on the WTF? quotient.

(Side note: You could tell which bands were the coolest at the SVS by how they reacted to the Smash Hits Questionaire. Three guesses who gave us the most trouble about them.)

― masonic boom, Monday, 16 July 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

No... no... I take that back... the question that lead to Jane sputtering "Are you saying Steps are smarter than me?" I don't remember the exact question, it was something about... "If your bandmates were prizes on a gameshow, what would they be?" and we just couldn't understand it. So the interviewer was telling us that they asked Steps in Smash Hits, and they got it no problem... we felt very stupid indeed after that.

― masonic boom, Monday, 16 July 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

If you were to be robbed how would you handle it.

― anthony, Monday, 16 July 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

What is your least favorite state?

― Sterling Clover, Monday, 16 July 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

I haven't gotten any weird ones -- unless detailed library policy questions are implicitly weird.

― Ned Raggett, Monday, 16 July 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Being interviewed by Creative Director in his office, CEO barges in, no apologies, whispers something in CD's ear, straightens up as if noticing me for first time. Sizes me up. Looking at me, but addressing CD, asks "so what's he do?" Perfect answer comes immediately to mind - "I work for you." 2 years later company folds under CEO's incompetent management.

― Tracer Hand, Monday, 16 July 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

being interviewed for my initial job at my current company, i don't remember anything, except we talked about wimbledon all the way through the interview. no way had i got that job, or so i thought...

― gareth, Monday, 16 July 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

"Would you describe your self as a hard worker?"

― Mike Hanle y, Monday, 16 July 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Band interviews: asked Supergrass the favourite kitchen appliance question (they were toaster men). But no way is that a dumb question. Dumb questions are "what are your influences?" and "tell us about your new album" and basically anything at all to do w/ music.

Job interviews: umm, nothing leaps to mind. I am impossibly laid back and nerve-free at job interviews. I totally give a "I don't give a fuck whether I get this" vibe and mebbe that explains ones I miss out on (that and lack of appropriate experience, and etc).

― AP, Monday, 16 July 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Job interviews where they ask, "Why do you want to work here?" They know you'd rather do anything else in the world than work at some stupid fucking job, so they just throw that in to remind you of the hopelessness of your position.

― tarden, Tuesday, 17 July 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

I once went for an interview at the offices of the paper mill here in Oxford (a friend was very disappointed that I didn't get the job coz she wanted to ask "Trouble at mill?" each time she saw me, which would never have grated of course). I was asked "How do you deal with people who make idiocy an art form?" I was totally unprepared for this one.

― MarkH, Tuesday, 17 July 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

I've had some disastrous interviews. One job interview went:

Them: So, have you ever experimented with drugs? Me: Errr... What do you mean? Them: Well, we worry about our employees' exposure to drugs. You said you're exams were hard: did you use anything to get through them? Me: Oh, heavens no. The only thing I relied on was vast amounts of Coke. Them: What? Me: Diet Coke! Caffeine! Err....

Didn't get that job, obviously.

Then I was interviewed for an Oxford music magazine and asked something like 'Do you feel Strange Fruit's success is due to the overwhelming dissatisfaction with today's music scene, both in Oxford and nationwide, and that people are now showing their contempt at this hegemony by embracing new and exciting forms of music?'

To which I replied: 'I think we get lots of people because it's free to get in...' Doh!

― Paul Strange, Tuesday, 17 July 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Having prepared rigorously for my last interview, and having discovered that if anyone asks you 'Where do you see yourself in five year's time' this is almost certainly somewhere you don't want to work if they can't think up less lame questions, I was horrified to be asked it. Having learnt that the correct response is not 'I want to be manager / executive / in your job' but something more wanky along the lines of 'well I want to see how I get on in this post and which of my skills can most be developed through exposure to new opportunities so I couldn't tell you' I gave such an answer. Glancing around the seven (count them) people interviewing me, I quickly realised this was not what they wanted... So I smiled and added that well obviously I also wanted to turn my thesis into three best- selling books, write regularly for the TLS and the LRB, and be flying in and out of Harvard as a visiting Professor. Everyone laughed, but I still don't know whether this was a 'what a card, he'd be great to work with' or a 'what a twat this man is' kind of way. Luckily the committee then decided to hire somewhere who didn't fit any of the major requirements for the job to do a completely different job. So I obviously didn't want to work for them anyway.

― alex thomson, Wednesday, 18 July 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

"What is the most unacceptable thing to come out of your ass?"

― mark s, Wednesday, 18 July 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

"How do you deal with people who make idiocy an art form?"

That's so completely brilliant. I want to be that person's bestest friend. What on earth did you reply?

I can't remember any interesting questions at interview since a Cambridge professor asked me to define the difference between ideology and philosophy. I gave a boss answer, but didn't get in because I was not quite smart enough get three As at A level without doing actually any work.

Sometimes I interview myself in my head at night. I ask all sorts of interesting things then, but I'm afraid I can't remember them now.

― Nick, Wednesday, 18 July 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

In (the v.hilarious) KITCHEN CONFIDENTIAL, [author z] is interviewed for a top chef job by charming panel of mobsters.
Key question: "What d'you know about me?"
Well, all he knows is that he's a mobster — so [author z] goes safe: "Absolutely nothing"
Till then the interview has gone well. Now a chill descends. This question is circled w/o being repeated. A joke? What was meant? "WHAT do you KNOW ABOUT me?"
"I'm sorry. Nothing. What can I say? Is it important?"
Politeness is maintained but the interview is over. After smalltalk, [author z] leaves. In the street outside he suddenly twigs — a lifetime too late — his idiotic error. Mobster was not some low-esteem egomaniac, or worried crim probing for hidden bad agendas, not at all. He was asking quite anothetr kind of question: "What d'you know about meat?"

― mark s, Wednesday, 18 July 2001 00:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

two years pass...

"What is your dream job?"
"If you could do anything, what would it be?"
"Wouldn't you really rather be doing X?"
"Why aren't you doing Y?"

― Mary (Mary), Friday, 20 February 2004 18:08 (twenty years ago) link

and the answers you gave?

― stevem (blueski), Friday, 20 February 2004 18:18 (twenty years ago) link

I hope your answer to "Why aren't you doing Y?" was "Y has the clap something fierce."

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Friday, 20 February 2004 18:19 (twenty years ago) link

or you could have shouted back "because your not doing the MCA bitch!"

― Chris V (Chris V), Friday, 20 February 2004 18:21 (twenty years ago) link

my answers:

Skycaptain in the world of tomorrow
be Skycaptain, in the world of tomorrow
no, X is not as good as being Skycaptain in the world of tomorrow
why all the whys?

― stevem (blueski), Friday, 20 February 2004 18:24 (twenty years ago) link

"Why would you make a good leader", asked when I was applying for a menial stare-at-a-computer-all-day-and-never-have-human-interaction job. wtf?

― oops (Oops), Friday, 20 February 2004 18:26 (twenty years ago) link

"So... Have you ever killed a man?"

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Friday, 20 February 2004 18:33 (twenty years ago) link

"You've been working freelance for a long time. Are you sure you're ready to re-enter the job force?"

― Mary (Mary), Friday, 20 February 2004 18:37 (twenty years ago) link

"Why did you give up your teaching career?"

Oh, thanks, I didn't know I ever had one!

― Mary (Mary), Friday, 20 February 2004 18:39 (twenty years ago) link

two months pass...

Revive!! I had a telephone interview for a Job in Portland, OR today. I live in MA. Everything was going fantastic until.... "So What are your plans for moving cross country if we offer you this position?" I'm positive that the interviewers know I don't make that much money and that it would be a big burden for me to move. At that point I wanted to rip my eyes out. I said something along the lines of " Oh I'm looking at the NE section of Portland because I hear the cost of living is cheaper, keep checking the newspapers and Craig's List". I really wasn't prepared for that question and I pulled the answer out of my ass. Not being able to see the interviewers reaction made it much more frustrating..sigh

― brg30 (brg30), Saturday, 15 May 2004 00:04 (twenty years ago) link

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