Look what god did to us...man

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So though the infinite wisdom of a failing IT government contracting organization, Ive been transferred to a support "war room". In brief, its what I would picture hell to be like; large room with plasma screens scrolling trouble ticket data and productivity numbers, 50+ waist-high cubicles with associated monkeys in headsets, and a pit of managment conveniently possitioned next to the only entrance/exit in the room.

At what point did my life spin wildly out of control?

Ive been thinking a lot about a career change. Something in the neighborhood of possibly a cook or an assassin. But even then, i already give up. My apathy has already engaged in a preemptive assault on the inevitable headaches of cooking. And I know im not motivated enough to kill people...Id probably get assigned a hit and end up just watching the History channel.

Blah blah blah. Im confused.

― Spinktor the Unmerciful (mawill5), Wednesday, 9 November 2005 15:55 (twenty years ago)

And I know im not motivated enough to kill people...

Being here long enough should change that problem.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 9 November 2005 15:57 (twenty years ago)

You'd think so. But very bad things have happened to my inner child. Shit thats not even legal in Kentucky.

― Spinktor the Unmerciful (mawill5), Wednesday, 9 November 2005 15:59 (twenty years ago)

I feel your pain. If abstractly.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 9 November 2005 16:03 (twenty years ago)

hi dere welcome to my life

― terry lennox. (gareth), Wednesday, 9 November 2005 16:04 (twenty years ago)

You could always combine the two (cook & assassin), it's probably a lot easier than you'd think.

― Huk-L (Huk-L), Wednesday, 9 November 2005 16:08 (twenty years ago)

The guy next to me has a steady mix of random house music and a butt-numbing assortment of "KRUNK!" going on, and has for the last 2 weeks.

And I swear the guy who sat here before shat himself and stuffed his undies under the floor tiles somewhere. Every time the A/C kicks up, the smell gets blasted up from under my desk. Shit intervals.

― Spinktor the Unmerciful (mawill5), Wednesday, 9 November 2005 16:09 (twenty years ago)

Stop complaining. You could've died in an earthquake or something.

(Sorry)

― Sociah T Azzahole (blueski), Wednesday, 9 November 2005 16:09 (twenty years ago)

I mean, in these situations it helps to think of those less fortunate than yourself

AND THEN LAUGH AT THEM.

― Sociah T Azzahole (blueski), Wednesday, 9 November 2005 16:10 (twenty years ago)

Im venting. And if internet message boards (including the wonderful world of ilx) were not meant for such a thing, then I guess I should just go back to sleep and re-evaluate the world as I understand it.

― Spinktor the Unmerciful (mawill5), Wednesday, 9 November 2005 16:11 (twenty years ago)

The cook/assassin idea is good. I mean you must combine the two.

― Sociah T Azzahole (blueski), Wednesday, 9 November 2005 16:12 (twenty years ago)

As a point of professional pride, don't ever kill with poisoned cuisine.

― I do feel guilty for getting any perverse amusement out of it (Rock Hardy), Wednesday, 9 November 2005 16:16 (twenty years ago)

Well, Id probably use the cooking job as a front. I would only combine the two if the situation presented itself in which I was cooking for the mark.

― Spinktor the Unmerciful (mawill5), Wednesday, 9 November 2005 16:25 (twenty years ago)

Which would go first on my business cards? Assassin or Cook?

Assassin because its place in the alphabet?
or
Cook to emphasize discretion?

― Spinktor the Unmerciful (mawill5), Wednesday, 9 November 2005 16:30 (twenty years ago)

FUGU CHEF

― Markelby (Mark C), Wednesday, 9 November 2005 16:44 (twenty years ago)

You could just poison all the people you cater for.

― Allyzay must fight Zolton herself. (allyzay), Wednesday, 9 November 2005 16:49 (twenty years ago)

That wouldnt leave me much for testimonials.

― Spinktor the Unmerciful (mawill5), Wednesday, 9 November 2005 16:54 (twenty years ago)

or cannibalism?

― A Nairn (moretap), Wednesday, 9 November 2005 16:54 (twenty years ago)

No, no, Nairn, you want to wear the skins of your enemies, not eat them. We've been over this before.

― kingfish orange creamsicle (kingfish 2.0), Wednesday, 9 November 2005 17:02 (twenty years ago)

Ass Cook

― Sociah T Azzahole (blueski), Wednesday, 9 November 2005 17:04 (twenty years ago)

I feel the pain of the office job with horrible working environment. I hope that I will never have to do that again.

I hope that it improves for you, man.

― Big Loud Mountain Ape (Big Loud Mountain Ape), Wednesday, 9 November 2005 17:28 (twenty years ago)

Dude come work in the ESOC!!! It's GREAT!!!!!!

I will say at least security work is better most of the time than handling trouble tickets at a fucking helpdesk. Fuck that.

If you could bring yourself to put up with the commute I'd have you a job in a week, serious.

Also, email me your goddamned contact info, and Dan's too, because I lost all of it.

― TOMBOT, Wednesday, 9 November 2005 17:55 (twenty years ago)

Maybe if you'd stop breaking your phones you'd still have Matt's #. Didn't Anthony get back to you or is he not allowed to talk to you now?

― Allyzay must fight Zolton herself. (allyzay), Wednesday, 9 November 2005 18:05 (twenty years ago)

No Anthony is not allowed to talk to me I guess.

Man this guy I am interviewing right now on the phone is a total no-go. Oh my god. No more referrals from f1txg3rald. Holy shit.

― TOMBOT, Wednesday, 9 November 2005 18:19 (twenty years ago)

STOP TALKING TO ME ABOUT DEPARTMENT OF DEFENSE STANDARD OPERATING PROCEDURES AND ANSWER THE GODDAMN QUESTIONS

― TOMBOT, Wednesday, 9 November 2005 18:20 (twenty years ago)

I lost your info as well. My phone decided to quit working. Seriously...just one day out of the blue. The only thing it would allow me to do is turn the volume down. Every button on the phone turned the volume down, and thats it.

Dont know what dan is up to. Saw him the other night for his birthday...his hair is long.

Im not driving to DC.

― Spinktor the Unmerciful (mawill5), Wednesday, 9 November 2005 18:23 (twenty years ago)

Well if you logged in you could see my email address. I don't log in from work. Oh, fuck it.

[nickname]64@[google's free email service]

― TOMBOT, Wednesday, 9 November 2005 18:27 (twenty years ago)

for fuck's sake there aren't any spamspiders trolling this board, what is the matter with you?

― Allyzay must fight Zolton herself. (allyzay), Wednesday, 9 November 2005 18:28 (twenty years ago)

Nobody drives to DC unless they're insane anyway. You do like all my other coworkers in MD, you park at the MARC, ride into Union Station and then take the red line two stops to the left. It's so simple.

Why do people who log in not realize why they never get spammed on this board? Do you know what your addresses look like to unregistered users?

― TOMBOT, Wednesday, 9 November 2005 18:34 (twenty years ago)

I've had my full email address posted on this board in posts before. No spam. The only spam I get is inexplicable shit from Military.com and I blame your bank account for that, somehow.

― Allyzay must fight Zolton herself. (allyzay), Wednesday, 9 November 2005 18:36 (twenty years ago)

At least you arent blaming the Jews this time.

― Spinktor the Unmerciful (mawill5), Wednesday, 9 November 2005 18:38 (twenty years ago)

I never get anything from that. WTF is a military.com, that sounds ludicrous and terrible and stupid, like that guy I just interviewed.

no spam YET, you mean.

― TOMBOT, Wednesday, 9 November 2005 18:39 (twenty years ago)

I only blame Jews when I get Jewish spam mail. That hasn't happened in years though.

― Allyzay must fight Zolton herself. (allyzay), Wednesday, 9 November 2005 18:50 (twenty years ago)

That sounds unkosher.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 9 November 2005 18:51 (twenty years ago)

Have you guys ever played Jaws on the NES? That shit is ridiculous.

― Spinktor the Unmerciful (mawill5), Wednesday, 9 November 2005 18:53 (twenty years ago)

I didn't know that Jaws existed for NES

― Allyzay must fight Zolton herself. (allyzay), Wednesday, 9 November 2005 18:54 (twenty years ago)

ihttp://www.tomheroes.com/images/nes%20jaws.jpg

― Spinktor the Unmerciful (mawill5), Wednesday, 9 November 2005 18:58 (twenty years ago)

I have to start working weekends soon, I've kinda decided I'm going to just download a SNES emulator and be a horrible leech on the taxpayer for 12 hours.

― DEFINITELY NOT TOMBOT, Wednesday, 9 November 2005 19:02 (twenty years ago)

The only SNES game I can stomach anymore is Earthbound. Thats about it.

― Spinktor the Unmerciful (mawill5), Wednesday, 9 November 2005 19:05 (twenty years ago)

You could always combine the two (cook & assassin), it's probably a lot easier than you'd think.

-- Huk-L (handsomishbo...) (webmail), November 9th, 2005 11:08 AM. (Huk-L) (later) (link)

http://www.cinelove.com/cinelove/main/pds/poster/u/Under_Siege.jpg

WHAT IS WRONG WITH JAWS ON NES?

― Jdubz (ex machina), Wednesday, 9 November 2005 19:16 (twenty years ago)

You collect conch shells. Lots of shells. Then you kill jaws. Thats absurd.

― Spinktor the Unmerciful (mawill5), Wednesday, 9 November 2005 19:17 (twenty years ago)

Do you have to pretend to be Roy Scheider the whole time?

― Allyzay must fight Zolton herself. (allyzay), Wednesday, 9 November 2005 19:39 (twenty years ago)

Thats not in the guidlines of the game, but I cant stop you from doing that if thats what you want to do.

― Spinktor the Unmerciful (mawill5), Wednesday, 9 November 2005 19:41 (twenty years ago)

I'm doing it right now. FYI.

― Allyzay must fight Zolton herself. (allyzay), Wednesday, 9 November 2005 19:44 (twenty years ago)

for fuck's sake there aren't any spamspiders trolling this board

There almost certainly are, given that the only spam I get to my domain as yet is always to the address that I only use on ILX.

― Forest Pines (ForestPines), Wednesday, 9 November 2005 20:31 (twenty years ago)

I kind of hope Dr Morbius, Scaredy Cat, and Scott McClellan are all the same person, so that I only get sent up for 20 years instead of life

― TOMBOT, Wednesday, 9 November 2005 20:34 (twenty years ago)

Forest, did you actually post your email address in a post? Ie not in your name sign off down there but actually in the body of the post. Cos as Tom says that's pretty much physically impossible because of how ILX codes the email addresses, unless there is a logged in spam spider here.

― Allyzay must fight Zolton herself. (allyzay), Wednesday, 9 November 2005 21:54 (twenty years ago)

No, I don't think I've ever posted this address in the body of a post. I've only been using it for a couple of months, and it's only appeared in the usual place.

― Forest Pines (ForestPines), Thursday, 10 November 2005 07:14 (twenty years ago)

Most likely coincidence.

― Allyzay must fight Zolton herself. (allyzay), Thursday, 10 November 2005 14:38 (twenty years ago)

I just realized that tomorrow is a holiday.

― Spinktor the Unmerciful (mawill5), Thursday, 10 November 2005 14:41 (twenty years ago)

It's hardly going to be coincidence that spammers should start sending emails to "ilx at my domain" but not to anything else at that domain. The *only* spam I get to anything on that domain is to the ilx address, which I've *never* posted anywhere else.

― Forest Pines (ForestPines), Thursday, 10 November 2005 15:47 (twenty years ago)

It's not a holiday for Lockhead Mantis employees.
Fuck off with your holidays.

― TOMBOT, Thursday, 10 November 2005 17:18 (twenty years ago)

Anyway Spinktor you're a wuss, we have an engineer who comes here every day from WILMINGTON, DE.

― TOMBOT, Thursday, 10 November 2005 17:19 (twenty years ago)

Lockheed Martin = one of the largest DoD contractors in the world.

Yet they dont recognize Armistice/Veterans day as a holiday. It makes my head hurt. Thinking. About it.

― Spinktor the Unmerciful (mawill5), Thursday, 10 November 2005 17:22 (twenty years ago)

Dont compare me to an engineer. Most of those dudes are "different" and are not meant for a basis of comparison.

― Spinktor the Unmerciful (mawill5), Thursday, 10 November 2005 17:23 (twenty years ago)

Prepare a scale of difference.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 10 November 2005 17:25 (twenty years ago)

dammit, i still want an engineer job again

― kingfish orange creamsicle (kingfish 2.0), Thursday, 10 November 2005 17:46 (twenty years ago)

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