screenwriting cliches (search and destroy)

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destroy: making your characters do your expository grunt work for you, e.g. when a character reveals a key piece of backstory we wouldn't have known otherwise and follows it up by asking the scene partner "remember?"

"my mother died three years ago... REMEMBER?"

every time i hear that, i myself die, inside, a little.

― mimi in st. louis (Jody Beth Rosen), Friday, 18 November 2005 06:57 (twenty years ago)

… "we can escape the neonazis soon as the fucking file finishes loading onto my flash drive."

― pretentioRemy (x Jeremy), Friday, 18 November 2005 07:02 (twenty years ago)

Your only valid beef is with the "remember" part. Characters providing exposition is completely normal.

― Paunchy Stratego (kenan), Friday, 18 November 2005 07:02 (twenty years ago)

Sam Mendes.

― Remy (x Jeremy), Friday, 18 November 2005 07:03 (twenty years ago)

Characters providing exposition is completely normal.

well DUH, but it's how they do it that matters.

― mimi in st. louis (Jody Beth Rosen), Friday, 18 November 2005 07:05 (twenty years ago)

OK... what were you watching when you thought of this?

― Paunchy Stratego (kenan), Friday, 18 November 2005 07:05 (twenty years ago)

If it was David Lynch's "Dune", I'm totally with you.

― Paunchy Stratego (kenan), Friday, 18 November 2005 07:06 (twenty years ago)

i'm not watching anything at the moment, but it's something that's bugged me for a while.

― mimi in st. louis (Jody Beth Rosen), Friday, 18 November 2005 07:07 (twenty years ago)

what i meant with my first sentence ("grunt work" etc) was that writers think that this very lazy device gets them off the hook from having to do any actual thinking about how to craft a well-wrought script.

― mimi in st. louis (Jody Beth Rosen), Friday, 18 November 2005 07:12 (twenty years ago)

Perky blonde women dancing "badly" to show that their quirky sides. See also: Chicken Little.

― Remy (x Jeremy), Friday, 18 November 2005 07:14 (twenty years ago)

~~that~~

― Remy (x Jeremy), Friday, 18 November 2005 07:14 (twenty years ago)

oof

― mimi in st. louis (Jody Beth Rosen), Friday, 18 November 2005 07:14 (twenty years ago)

Kevin Klein (or a Kevin Klein-like character) crying at the discovery of how wonderful / lucky / precious life is.

― Remy (x Jeremy), Friday, 18 November 2005 07:17 (twenty years ago)

Using an asian dude to immediate communicate "foreign & incomprehensible" bugs me a lot

also, employing high school social mechanics at a college

― kingfish hobo juckie (kingfish 2.0), Friday, 18 November 2005 07:17 (twenty years ago)

the "THAT NIGHT" narrative voiceover on sex and the city.

― mimi in st. louis (Jody Beth Rosen), Friday, 18 November 2005 07:17 (twenty years ago)

Fans of screenwriting cliches need to see Equus.

― 'Twan (miccio), Friday, 18 November 2005 07:18 (twenty years ago)

this doesn't happen so much anymore but i HATE HATE HATE when a scene starts with a character saying "so let me get this straight: [exposition here]" or "so that's the whole story. [exposition here, repeated for no reason]."

― J.D. (Justyn Dillingham), Friday, 18 November 2005 07:19 (twenty years ago)

Using an asian dude to immediate communicate "foreign & incomprehensible" bugs me a lot

i have no fucking idea why asians are still picked on in pop culture as much as they are. but that's outside the parameters of the thread, so i'll shut up.

― mimi in st. louis (Jody Beth Rosen), Friday, 18 November 2005 07:21 (twenty years ago)

I have a lot of rules involving narration. Narration at the end of a movie is like shitting at the table you were eating at.

― 'Twan (miccio), Friday, 18 November 2005 07:22 (twenty years ago)

i kind of like it when movies start off with narration, then just sort of forget about it, like in "the third man" or every billy wilder movie.

― J.D. (Justyn Dillingham), Friday, 18 November 2005 07:23 (twenty years ago)

i want to hear some "search" answers! what are your favorite screenwriting cliches from the world of good badfilm?

― mimi in st. louis (Jody Beth Rosen), Friday, 18 November 2005 07:23 (twenty years ago)

i kind of like it when movies start off with narration, then just sort of forget about it, like in "the third man" or every billy wilder movie.

haha yes! wes anderson to thread.

― mimi in st. louis (Jody Beth Rosen), Friday, 18 November 2005 07:24 (twenty years ago)

destroy: characters wandering around aimlessly as a gentle pretty pop tune plays to signify their alienation! thanks a lot, mike nichols!

HAHA x-post!

― J.D. (Justyn Dillingham), Friday, 18 November 2005 07:24 (twenty years ago)

search: mental turmoil = downstage turn!

― gem (trisk), Friday, 18 November 2005 07:25 (twenty years ago)

I'm not the biggest Wilder fan, but he was right when he said that narration is a logical device to introduce a story, but totally extraneous when ending one. It's usually the sign of a writer who can't shut up.

one thing I'll give Tarantino is that it never feels like the movie has stopped so we can listen to a pop song. Few other directors pull it off.

― 'Twan (miccio), Friday, 18 November 2005 07:26 (twenty years ago)

search: Robert Towne having someone tell a long joke whose only point is to make us like the character.

― 'Twan (miccio), Friday, 18 November 2005 07:27 (twenty years ago)

the only end-of-movie narration i remember really liking was at the end of "band of outsiders." "stay tuned for the tropical adventures of odile and franz!!"

― J.D. (Justyn Dillingham), Friday, 18 November 2005 07:29 (twenty years ago)

i have to go to bed now. make me proud, ilx!

― mimi in st. louis (Jody Beth Rosen), Friday, 18 November 2005 07:29 (twenty years ago)

search: ending an ensemble comedy with a free-for-all brawl. not to be mistaken for a car pile-up. I'm talking about faces mugging and punches (and pies) hitting the wrong person, not long shots of wreckage.

― 'Twan (miccio), Friday, 18 November 2005 07:30 (twenty years ago)

search: when the heroine has a little sister who makes morbid comments all the time ("meet me in st louis," "the philadelphia story")

destroy: cranky old man with a heart of gold

― J.D. (Justyn Dillingham), Friday, 18 November 2005 07:34 (twenty years ago)

relating to what remy said, a group of women singing into various household items (usually a hairbrush) as though they were microphones and dancing around and such, to the accompaniment of a '60s pop tune

― joseph (joseph), Friday, 18 November 2005 07:34 (twenty years ago)

oh i guess that's a destroy.

― joseph (joseph), Friday, 18 November 2005 07:35 (twenty years ago)

supposedly there's a Freddie Prinze Jr./Julia Stiles movie that's full of that shit.

― 'Twan (miccio), Friday, 18 November 2005 07:35 (twenty years ago)

oh dear god.

xpost: fuck, any (fill in position here) with a "heart of gold": DESTROY

― joseph (joseph), Friday, 18 November 2005 07:37 (twenty years ago)

Kevin Klein (or a Kevin Klein-like character) crying at the discovery of how wonderful / lucky / precious life is.

Don't pick on Kevin Klein. This is way more Tom Hanks territory.

― Paunchy Stratego (kenan), Friday, 18 November 2005 07:39 (twenty years ago)

ihttp://tecfa.unige.ch/perso/staf/lattion/blog/images/thumb-GrandCanyon.jpg http://www.webwombat.com.au/entertainment/dvds/images/lifeas.jpg

kline is worth picking on

― 'Twan (miccio), Friday, 18 November 2005 07:42 (twenty years ago)

I like that movie! Steve Martin: "Where's the money shot?!"

― Paunchy Stratego (kenan), Friday, 18 November 2005 07:43 (twenty years ago)

OK, life as a house is a bit much.

― Paunchy Stratego (kenan), Friday, 18 November 2005 07:44 (twenty years ago)

Life as a House!
The Emperor's Club!
The Ice Storm! (but I like this one…)
Grand Canyon!

(Also… I think that voice-over narrations take a lot more heat then they deserve. It's like at some point it was decided that they were Bad writing, and so they've become a really soft target.)

― pretentioRemy (x Jeremy), Friday, 18 November 2005 07:45 (twenty years ago)

(plus people are really bad at it these days - see Wonder Boys)

destroy: bad divorced dad redeems himself with the help of magic and/or criminal activity.

― 'Twan (miccio), Friday, 18 November 2005 07:47 (twenty years ago)

voice-over narrations aren't so bad, if used effectively. it does sort of jar when it's used like in seven, where it appears practically out of nowhere.

― joseph (joseph), Friday, 18 November 2005 07:48 (twenty years ago)

xpost

the "THAT NIGHT" narrative voiceover on sex and the city.

I hadn't thought of it, but yeah. "That night, Samantha FINALLY found someone to have really satisfying boob sex with."

― Paunchy Stratego (kenan), Friday, 18 November 2005 07:48 (twenty years ago)

The Ice Storm! (but I like this one…)
Grand Canyon!

I will defend Grand Canyon, but understand that I'm schmaltzy that way.

― Paunchy Stratego (kenan), Friday, 18 November 2005 07:50 (twenty years ago)

actually, I like Grand Canyon a little too…

― Remy (x Jeremy), Friday, 18 November 2005 08:03 (twenty years ago)

The Magical Negro without a doubt is the most annoying for me. I turned off "In America" about ten minutes after the offending character was introduced.

Related to that, I guess, would be the super-religious zealot black person, the freaky voodoo black person (who can tell the future/foreshadow), the Forrest Gump retard with wise and insightful things to say at just the right times, and last but not least the noble savage.

― recovering optimist (Royal Bed Bouncer), Friday, 18 November 2005 08:03 (twenty years ago)

I hate the female characters who are married to men with important jobs who get really mad when their husbands are called into work and who, invariably failing to realise that this is the most crucial day of his job ever, throw the kids and the dog and some soft duffle bags of clothes into the car and take off for their mother's.

― estela (estela), Friday, 18 November 2005 08:12 (twenty years ago)

Ooo! I hate that, too. That's one where I would really enjoy seeing a gender swap. The workaholic female attorney working on the biggest case ever, and the stay-at-home dad...

― recovering optimist (Royal Bed Bouncer), Friday, 18 November 2005 08:21 (twenty years ago)

like a star is born?

― mimi in st. louis (Jody Beth Rosen), Friday, 18 November 2005 08:23 (twenty years ago)

Screenwriting cliche #1

First scene: protagonist wakes up and crawls out of bed.

― Good Dog (Good Dog), Friday, 18 November 2005 08:29 (twenty years ago)

Partially-obstructed views that give rise to miscomprehensions of various sub-sit-com situations. See "Sam Mendes" above.

― remy (x Jeremy), Friday, 18 November 2005 08:37 (twenty years ago)

Skipping 172 messages at this point... Click here if you want to load them all.

And then it could go through a tunnel!

― 'Twan (miccio), Sunday, 20 November 2005 14:53 (twenty years ago)

HAHAHAHA Awesome

― Abbadabba Berman (Hurting), Sunday, 20 November 2005 15:00 (twenty years ago)

How about anything involving looking into a kaleidescope/snow globe/prism/aquarium/lava lamp or whatever to invoke wonderment and awe.

― Abbadabba Berman (Hurting), Sunday, 20 November 2005 15:56 (twenty years ago)

I hate it when there's too much gazing and eye-contact without dialogue between characters. In real life, people chatter and try to establish commonalities, even if with complete falsehoods. If someone gazed at you without speaking they way they do in every other movie you'd get the creeps. And when characters DO talk, it's often some stupid actor-ish monologue, while the other character is totally silent, rather than holding up their end with small responses and interruptions the way real people do.

― Beth Parker (Beth Parker), Sunday, 20 November 2005 16:30 (twenty years ago)

what i hate is the way tv/radio talk show hosts are always cutting off their guests. i know time is at a premium and they have to keep the shows entertaining, but sheesh, if you're going to have guests at all, don't keep interrupting them mid-sentence, don't ask them to hurry up and get to the point, don't second-guess all their answers before they've opened their mouths.

yeah people suck, but be honest with yourself about it.

― j b goddamnfucking r (Jody Beth Rosen), Sunday, 20 November 2005 16:45 (twenty years ago)

It's true. Sometimes I transcribe taped interviews, and it's amazing to see how dogged interviewers can be about sticking to their list of questions. They'll interrupt the interviewee right when they're getting into the zone—really telling a good story—in order to ask something dopey like "who would you say were your biggest influences?" Makes me crazy. You resort to your question list if the interview is DRAGGING. Duh!

― Beth Parker (Beth Parker), Sunday, 20 November 2005 16:57 (twenty years ago)

How is that a screenwriting cliche?

― Abbadabba Berman (Hurting), Sunday, 20 November 2005 22:50 (twenty years ago)

uh, it's not, it's called the thread going momentarily off-topic.

― j b goddamnfucking r (Jody Beth Rosen), Sunday, 20 November 2005 22:51 (twenty years ago)

my all-time favourite bit of "remember" exposition EVER is in the first dr who movie, where it is given to two DALEKS to explain the history of their own planet to one another!!

― mark s (mark s), Sunday, 20 November 2005 23:07 (twenty years ago)

also you forgot the worst bit of film-phone business = when the other guy hangs up and the one our end LOOKS AT THE RECEIVER!

this has never happened in the history of real life ever

(sistrah becky always gets annoyed when ppl deeply dreathe in the scent of is it carnations? anyway a famously non-smelling flower except in films)

― mark s (mark s), Sunday, 20 November 2005 23:12 (twenty years ago)

beth parker… I don't think most screenwriters worth their (waldo) salt have any interest in approximating the inarticulate verbal minutuae that makes up 'real' speech.

― remy (x Jeremy), Sunday, 20 November 2005 23:20 (twenty years ago)

i watched "john q" on tv last night -- it's hokey really but it ratchets up the "social message" business like sam fuller (kinda) (ie absurdly melodramatic and shouty in a a good way) and is v.watchable generally

but it has the MOTHER of all "carefully prepared forgotten elements", which i hesitate to mention as it feelks like a spoiler even though it TOTALLY isn't (it's obvious right from the moment the kid collapses what this earlier scene will come to mean, an hour and 20 mins later), but the way it's dpone is so extreme it's kinda spooky and disorientating

it is also fun bcz you can play the game of calling him "dave q" thoughout

― mark s (mark s), Sunday, 20 November 2005 23:33 (twenty years ago)

the important thing to remember abt voiceovers is that they = unreliable narrator always

http://fladnag.free.free.fr/cercledefaeries/galeries/dune/alia8.jpg

― mark s (mark s), Sunday, 20 November 2005 23:36 (twenty years ago)

Destroy: Happy endings

― beanz (beanz), Monday, 21 November 2005 12:01 (twenty years ago)

One irritating screenwriting cliché is when characters illustrate a point by telling a story. Like someone asks a character some important question, and whether he's a cop, a professor, a boxer, or a janitor, he's always able to come up out of the blue with an eloquent, metaphoric story (which usually concerns something about his childhood - "When I was a kid, my dad used to...") that'll in the end answer the question. And the other character always stays silent through the whole monologue. Can you imagine what this'd be like in real life...?

"Hey Jack, why do you always act like an asshole around women?"

"You see Bruce, when I was a child I had a dog that I loved profoundly. He's name was Beppo. Now Beppo, he loved digging up the worms in our backyard, his black nose always deep in the soil. But one day, one dreadful day that I'll never forget..."

"Hey! HEY!"

"What?"

"I asked why you're acting like a jerk, I don't want to hear a story about a fucking dog called Zeppo eating fucking worms!"

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Monday, 21 November 2005 12:18 (twenty years ago)

Morgan Freeman always gets these parts.

"Oftentimes..."

"When a man..."

"You know, some say..."

― beanz (beanz), Monday, 21 November 2005 12:23 (twenty years ago)

even worse is when a whole movie is based on that premise. I hate you I hate you, wait, I LOVE YOU!

In fairness, Jane Austen to thread.

― Come Back Johnny B (Johnney B), Monday, 21 November 2005 12:31 (twenty years ago)

Yeah, I actually had an image of Morgan Freeman in my head while writing the previous post. The storyteller thing can often intertwine with the "magical negro" persona mentioned utphread, of which Freeman is the best present-day example.

(x-post)

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Monday, 21 November 2005 12:32 (twenty years ago)

I think I might skip the penguin film purely because of him. Even though I, like everyone else, love penguins.

― beanz (beanz), Monday, 21 November 2005 12:36 (twenty years ago)

what i hate is the way tv/radio talk show hosts are always cutting off their guests.

I love when radio hosts who do this get phone callers who are even worse.

― tokyo nursery school: afternoon session (rosemary), Monday, 21 November 2005 14:37 (twenty years ago)

beth parker… I don't think most screenwriters worth their (waldo) salt have any interest in approximating the inarticulate verbal minutuae that makes up 'real' speech. Yeah, I know, accept the artifice inherent in the form, but sometimes screenwriters DO try, and it's alway cool. Or sometimes cool. The Altmanesque hubbub effect can be confusing. God forbid I get more confused than I already am.

― Beth Parker (Beth Parker), Monday, 21 November 2005 14:58 (twenty years ago)

Destroy - sideline conversations about the minutae of popular culture, two blokes in a submarine arguing about who drew Silver Surfer the best or which Aerosmith album rocks hardest or the origins of smurfs etc:

Stand up Kevin Smith/Tarantino & loads of others...

― mzui (mzui), Monday, 21 November 2005 16:11 (twenty years ago)

Why should that be destroyed?

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Monday, 21 November 2005 16:35 (twenty years ago)

That kind of thing was fresh and fun in the early 90s, but is so overplayed now.

― chap who would dare to tell uninteresting celeb spotting stories (chap), Monday, 21 November 2005 16:52 (twenty years ago)

Hack the computer. DAMN! It's asking for a password. I know:

Types: "OVERRIDE"

― dog latin (dog latin), Monday, 21 November 2005 17:08 (twenty years ago)

More tension = faster typing

― beanz (beanz), Monday, 21 November 2005 17:16 (twenty years ago)

That kind of thing was fresh and fun in the early 90s, but is so overplayed now.

Exactly!

― mzui (mzui), Monday, 21 November 2005 17:23 (twenty years ago)

The whole guessing someone's password on a computer in 30 seconds deal.

'Hang on! What was the professor's dead daughter's pet gerbil called?'
'Stinky'
*types STINKY, still no luck*
'Damn!'
*moments pause*
'Wait, what age was Stinky when he died?'
'Umm, 5'
*types STINKY5*
'WERE IN!'

― mzui (mzui), Monday, 21 November 2005 17:27 (twenty years ago)

Plus, no-one uses anything close to Windows, Linux or any other kind of platform in movies - it always looks like some kind of weird Powerpoint based interface or something done on a BBC Micro.

― dog latin (dog latin), Monday, 21 November 2005 17:37 (twenty years ago)

Yeah, big green letters on a black screen.

― chap who would dare to tell uninteresting celeb spotting stories (chap), Monday, 21 November 2005 17:39 (twenty years ago)

I remember 'Contact' in particular being hilarious for it's computer based shenanigans, all that stuff about sidebands and isolating frequencies.

― mzui (mzui), Monday, 21 November 2005 17:40 (twenty years ago)

The finale approaches and everyone is wondering, whodunit? Omigod, it was the protagonist's best buddy!! Now who would've though that?!

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Wednesday, 23 November 2005 12:21 (twenty years ago)

xxpost
in flashing text:
"ACCESS GRANTED"
or
"MATCH FOUND"

come ON! we're in a hurry here!

― D.I.Y. U.N.K.L.E. (dave225.3), Wednesday, 23 November 2005 13:01 (twenty years ago)

"Now there are 7 locks on this safe. The first 6 I can do, but it'll take time. The 7th is going to be a real badass."

― beanz (beanz), Wednesday, 23 November 2005 13:16 (twenty years ago)

My least favourite line of dialogue ever : "I'm so, so sorry". Said mawkishly when someone's wife dies or whatever. Piss off.

― Matt #2 (Matt #2), Wednesday, 23 November 2005 14:33 (twenty years ago)

WHITE DETECTIVE: Look, I'm just tryin' to do my job here. I can't help it if you people keep getting in my way.
BLACK POLICE OFFICER: "You people"? You tryin' to bring race into this?
WHITE DETECTIVE: You got me all wrong. I just know when to call a spade a spade.

― Pleasant Plains /// (Pleasant Plains ///), Wednesday, 23 November 2005 19:54 (twenty years ago)

In Veronica Mars, everyone uses OS X.

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Wednesday, 23 November 2005 20:20 (twenty years ago)

Destroy: conversations in dramatic TV shows that end with character 1 walking away, then char2 saying char1's name to get them to turn back around, and then char2 saying "good luck" or "thanks".

There's also "be careful"

Destroy: When a guy thinks his girlfriend is getting sexual with him (he can never see/is asleep or something) but it's really her pet dog/cat/monkey etc., then he sees it's a pet, thinks for a second, and "goes with it". eeewwww! it's not funny!

Search: Harold wakes up to Kumar licking him

― alex in montreal (alex in montreal), Wednesday, 23 November 2005 20:28 (twenty years ago)

Search: thousands of films from the Forties and Fifties that contain the line "Saaaay, whats the big idea?"

― mzui (mzui), Wednesday, 23 November 2005 22:49 (twenty years ago)

also: "oh, a wise guy, eh?"

― J.D. (Justyn Dillingham), Thursday, 24 November 2005 02:28 (twenty years ago)

two weeks pass...

Set-up: Oh no, ghosts!
Pay-Off: Oh NO! I'M A GHOST!

(ghost can be replaced by psycho killer, alien, brainwashed assassin etc.)

― Fritz Wollner (Fritz), Friday, 9 December 2005 15:37 (twenty years ago)

two years pass...

destroy: wickedly funny side character

― Autumn Almanac, Sunday, 1 June 2008 00:37 (seventeen years ago)

Has anyone here ever shouted "Nnooo!" when somethingf bad happens, or even seen anyone else do it?

Hahaha the movies have gotten me to do this. I end up making the NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO face in a lot of photos.

― Abbott, Sunday, 1 June 2008 03:45 (seventeen years ago)

fourteen years pass...

my current least favorite - someone who can't solve a mystery or piece something together....

UNTIL THEY HAVE A CONVENIENTLY LUCID DREAM THAT REVEALS THE ELUSIVE ANSWER.

exception: Sopranos season 2, Tony re: Big Pussy.

― We were clothed, except for Caan, who was naked. Don't know why. (Neanderthal), Wednesday, 13 July 2022 02:25 (three years ago)

God I hated the dream sequences in the Sopranos.

― Antifa Sandwich Artist (Boring, Maryland), Wednesday, 13 July 2022 13:56 (three years ago)

Yeah, big green letters on a black screen.

welcome to my notepad++ settings

― Ste, Wednesday, 13 July 2022 14:01 (three years ago)

I once passed James Gandolfini on the sidewalk of a Soho sidestreet sitting in front of a science project volcano, talking to another, standing man while the presumed creator or co-creator of the volcano as well as offspring of Gandolfini stood there as well. All I could think was “I’m in Tony Soprano’s dream sequence!”

― L.H.O.O.Q. Jones (James Redd and the Blecchs), Wednesday, 13 July 2022 16:13 (three years ago)

one year passes...

making defeating the ultimate villain near-impossible to the point where when it does happen, the way it happens has to be disappointing.

like the finale of Bodies

― a very very unfair (Neanderthal), Monday, 13 November 2023 19:22 (two years ago)

two middle aged men playing squash/raquetball in the white indoor court... one is happily married (George Segal), the other a divorced swinging single (Elliot Gould)

― Andy the Grasshopper, Monday, 13 November 2023 19:34 (two years ago)

Anything where two characters meet for the first time and one of them says something like “got to say - I’m a huge fan of yours”. Was cute when Christopher Eccleston said it to Charles Dickens - repeated to death now

― Chuck_Tatum, Monday, 13 November 2023 20:48 (two years ago)

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