Enter your Mum NOW!

(Should have quite while you were ahead i.e the first one)

i was expecting something a little more juicier.

ps you sorted you hair out yet ;-)

no i haven't. it's still shit.

Dry cleaner on the LES with sign in window that sez "Dry cleaning done on premise." On what premise, I wonder -- that I'll be able to pay for it afterwards? (Debateable.) On the premise that they'll totally shrink/rip/fade my glad rags? (Likely.)

The big daily paper in N.E. Miss pissed off one of its biggest advertisers so bad that the advertiser pumped money into the creation of a rival newspaper to compete with it. The advertiser's slogan was "GOOD STUFF CHEAP!!"... at some point it put together a big ad for swimwear and beachwear using local high school girls as models. So the ad runs with the finest local examples of taut virginal local femininity all wearing bikinis and short-shorts and suchlike, under the enormous banner "GOOD STUFF CHEAP!!" The advertiser was pissed at the paper for failing to anticipate how stupid they'd look, even though the ad was the company's idea.

In the window of a local Indian grocery: "Free Goat With Purchase 1 Gallon Milk"