Is this the twattiest website ever?

"A new school year at a new school started back for me yesterday. Fresh new pussy and asses to beat all around. My first day didn't start off too bad. But after I finished eating lunch in the cafeteria I notice this fat, ugly guy eating alone. The guy has no friends to talk to, he barely fits in the seat, and I see a few people pointing and making jokes. The fatboy tries to hide his pain, but I notice a few tears rolling down the side of his face. As he begins to leave I decide to follow. We both get outside and I begin to follow him. I hear him begin to talk to himself "Those mother fuckers, they'll see someday. When I'm making all the money and they're low life scum, we'll see who's laughing." So I get a right next to him and I say "Why don't you cry about it LARDASS!!!!" And he gets a bit bewildered and keeps walking. So now I'm up behind him saying "Fat ass! Chug a lug, chug a lug. Fat ass! Chug a lug, chug a lug." And this goes on for at least 10 minutes, when out of no where he swings around and puts all his weight into this punch, hits me in the face and I go straight to the ground. I didn't know fat people could be so quick. And now he's sprinting to get away from me. His punch may have been quick, but his feet sure weren't. I begin to jog to catch up to him and when I do catch him he tries his swing punch again. I say "No, no, no fat boy. Not this time." I dunk under the punch, he tries to run again, so I trip him and his fat ass goes flying into a pop machine head first. And I decide since we're so close to the pop machines I might as well get me a nice refreshment for my buddy and me. I get myself a New Mountain Dew Code Red and for my fat friend a Diet Pepsi. I open his up and begin to pour it all over his face. He begins to cry and say he's sorry for whatever it is he's done. Then I just begin to wail on him. Then I say "Listen fatboy! You're a worthless piece of shit, you'll always be a worthless piece of shit and I don't want you thinking other wise. GOT IT?" He says "Yes sir." Then when he gets up I tell him to go home and play his faggot ass GameCube and that I never want to see his lardass around campus again. Beat that ass!"

Jesus.

Hi Chris Lyons... You are a poor exuse for a person. I hope you smarten up with age!I am all for everyone sharing his/her opinions but not when it downright hurts a person in the process. You are the most ignorant person here and I am ashamed of you!

chris isn't the most ignorant person here! thats ridiculuous. he's the second most ignorant person. after me.

Garreth are you really that horrid????? I doubt it very much.

Gale, you're confused. Chris is quoting a very silly site.

I thought he was quoting Jesus.

I thought he owned the site. :( I apologize Chris Lyons.

Surely this is a joke?

That's okay, Gale.

It's very possible it is a joke. There's a bit where one of the blokes who writes it claims that he has to use two hands to wank. And the pictures of the main writers look like Photoshopped versions of those two brothers in UB40.

Perhaps it's another Smokehammer or something. Chris Morris' or Armando Ianuucci's satirical comment on the state of American yoof.

Can't be a joke. It's too banal to be a joke.

These guys should realize that no matter how much cutesily "politically incorrect" stories they write, and no matter how many women they've slept with (or claim to have slept with), posting half-naked pictures of themselves and bragging about having anal sex with women just isn't gonna convince any sexually- experienced adult that these fellers are 100% certain which as to which holes their dicks prefer.

Poor dopes.

Closer inspection reveals the site to be either a troll (as in trolling for angry responses) or some 13 year old boy's sick fantasies. Some of the more unlikely stories (warning: disturbing, depressing stuff):

"I told my girlfriend to come into the bathroom real quick.  I was like "Baby, I love you" And she got this big smile on her face and leaned over to kiss me.  And I just pissed right all over the side of her face.  Piss was all over the bitch.  Her hair, face, shoulders, everywhere.  She got pretty pissed.  I just laughed it up and told her to get the fuck out.  But she thought she'd be funny too.  Since she knew I'd be in there for a while longer, she decided to pinch a loaf off into the shitter. . ."

"My little brother comes up to me today (he's 13) and he asks what pussy tastes like. I thought long and hard about this one because I've never really put much thought into it. Finally I was like, "Strawberry Yogurt." And then he asks me how you eat pussy, if you're supposed to suck on it or chew it. I was like, "No man, you just lick it." But he still didn't understand. So I went to the kitchen and grabbed a cup of Kroger brand Strawberry Yogurt (fruit at the bottom) and smeared a couple teaspoons on my asshole. . ."

"Chad and I were driving down the street earlier, lookin to get our grub on, when a dirty, ugly, white trash fat girl wearing a mumu starts to flag us down.  So we're thinking, "Alright, let's see what this fat bitch wants." We hang a quick U-turn and pulled up to the curb next to the fat sea heffer.  Chad was closest to heard and said to her "What you need fat ass?" And she replies "I just wanted to see what those ugly, mother fuckers from powerpain really looked like up close."  Not the best answer to give 2 bad asses who can definitely run faster than some fat bitch. . ."

All this besides the fact that they talk about their date raping experiences and various other crimes they commited on a public website...

After hearing the Raunchy Young Lepers, nothing surprises me any more when it comes to what bored teenage fuckups will do given the right tools.

Good God, this is the funniest fucking thing I've ever seen! Come on, admit it! Even if it is true, you'd be laughing if somebody was relating these stories to you.

These people are thee biggest lamerz on this earth. How I wish I actually could hax0r, they would ph33l tha ph34r! Note that they have a guestbook, tho' I didn't feel like contributing to it.

It is funny, cos it's a joke!

Even if it is true, you'd be laughing if somebody was relating these stories to you.

Hmm...

PP guy: "So...yeah...I ended up smearing some strawberry yogurt on my shitter and you just would NOT BELIEVE what my little brother did. He, uh...yo, you want some more beer?"

Me: "Oh FUCK OFF, you fucking NAMBLA retard."

Nah. Can't see it.

that is some of the most homerotic stuff i've seen since gummo.

I don't think I like humour any more. Thank god, I was sick of jokes anyway!

I think people from America really are like this. I've read several books about them.

The funniest website I have ever seen. I wish they had website awards for shit like that. Although I can understand why some people would take offense to PowerPain.com... Not everyone has a sense of humor, which is sad, because then they wouldn't take silly shit like this so seriously. PowerPain tries to target two types of audiences: People who enjoy raunchy and obscene jokes/storytelling, and people with no sense of humor who are insulted by their arrogance and hatred. Anyone who spends more than 30 seconds at the website will soon learn it's all a joke, evident by the all the photos and entries about rubbin' strawberry yogurt on their assholes. C'mon guys, it's laugh-out-loud funny shit.

It's not offensive, it's just not funny to anyone with a mental age of more than 11.

Along the same kind of lines, but less disturbing and more plain weird. http://www.xilef.ltd.uk/story_archive/decision/jillshc.htm Hairdresser erotica?

it's not funny 'cause it's real.