my dad is on myspace and he's friends with a BABE

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my dad joined myspace. currently, his friends are me, my sister, and a CELEBRITY MASSEUSE WHOSE DEFAULT PICTURE IS FROM HER FHM SHOOT.

should this make me uncomfortable?! it DOES. but should it? what the fuck, dad...

― killy (baby lenin pin), Saturday, 14 January 2006 22:24 (nineteen years ago)

it's well dodgy.

Is this meant for ILE

― adamrl (nordicskilla), Saturday, 14 January 2006 22:29 (nineteen years ago)

never mind

― adamrl (nordicskilla), Saturday, 14 January 2006 22:29 (nineteen years ago)

Forty, fifty years ago the equivalent would have been him reading his Playboys in front of you. Middle aged dads thinking that way un-shockah.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Saturday, 14 January 2006 22:30 (nineteen years ago)

you know we need to see this to pass appropriate judgement but your dad doesn't seem to be a fan of your band

― kyle (akmonday), Saturday, 14 January 2006 22:40 (nineteen years ago)

your dad doesn't seem to be a fan of your band

eh? why don't i get that?

― killy (baby lenin pin), Saturday, 14 January 2006 22:43 (nineteen years ago)

Those babes send "Add me" requests to everyone. Your dad probably thought it was a nice gesture and accepted, as MySpace n00bs are prone to do.

Or maybe you have another sister that he never told you about.

― naus (Robert T), Saturday, 14 January 2006 23:19 (nineteen years ago)

your dad doesn't seem to be a fan of your band

eh? why don't i get that?

It's because he looked up your email address on myspace and it came up as a band and there were no middle-aged male friends of that band.

― naus (Robert T), Saturday, 14 January 2006 23:28 (nineteen years ago)

Doesn't "Celebrity" imply "somebody other than your family has heard of you"?

― Sinister Oink Kingpin (noodle vague), Saturday, 14 January 2006 23:30 (nineteen years ago)

pix plz

― alex t (bato), Sunday, 15 January 2006 01:39 (nineteen years ago)

he just called to tell me the story. apparently, he was looking up pictures of "strep throat" (because he's sick with that) and came across a link to something involving Project Object (he's really into Frank Zappa). the link was on this babe's site, he emailed her to say he was really into Frank Zappa and had never seen him live, had she? and she sent him a link to some live music clips, which happened to be on her myspace profile. he asked to be friends with her on myspace b/c it would "freak my daughters out!"

mission accomplished, daddy!

― killy (baby lenin pin), Sunday, 15 January 2006 02:20 (nineteen years ago)

this is what happens when one doesn't properly instill Fear of the Internet into one's parents

― kingfish kuribo's shoe (kingfish 2.0), Sunday, 15 January 2006 02:35 (nineteen years ago)

http://img233.imageshack.us/img233/7273/poweredbysargassodotnl0kh.gif

― Doogie Howser, Sunday, 15 January 2006 02:39 (nineteen years ago)

Relax! Your father's reference to freaking you out was just Zappa-insider-speak, incorporating an allusion to what is perhaps his best known album, and thereby showing off his bona fides to another fan - hopefully allowing him to wiggle his way into her pants at some future date. Nothing to worry about.

― Aimless (Aimless), Sunday, 15 January 2006 02:59 (nineteen years ago)

I was hope that she got to go home early.

― Pleasant Plains /// (Pleasant Plains ///), Sunday, 15 January 2006 03:00 (nineteen years ago)

What I'm wondering is why does Ned think that it was normal for dads to read their Playboys in front of their kids? Forty, fifty years ago or like, EVER? dude.

― Kim (Kim), Sunday, 15 January 2006 22:32 (nineteen years ago)

if you define "normal" as "most commonly seen", then I can totally see why Ned said that.. because, from my experience as well, it's true! Maybe the Playboys were put in a closet more often than on the coffeetable, but every kid whose house I went to would always go to "the stash" and bring them out for all of us to look at and wonder.. way to go, dad!

― Dom iNut (donut), Sunday, 15 January 2006 22:54 (nineteen years ago)

pardon me, yes that's a normal dad, but that's an ubsubtle difference from "him reading his Playboys in front of you". whuhhh.

― Kim (Kim), Sunday, 15 January 2006 23:29 (nineteen years ago)

Possibly it all had to do with the strength of his afterwork martini.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Sunday, 15 January 2006 23:30 (nineteen years ago)

My dad had no Playboy stash, and god knows I looked for it.

― DV (dirtyvicar), Sunday, 15 January 2006 23:35 (nineteen years ago)

I've had several female friends who went to their boyfriend's family parties only to have her boyfriend's stepdad ask her if "he really gave it to her really good at night"

I mean, maybe I grew up in a land of psychos, but crazy family stories are normal.. and this area is no exception. Is is acceptable? No.. but is it common? Hell yes.

― Dom iNut (donut), Monday, 16 January 2006 00:02 (nineteen years ago)

were they all asked by the same stepdad?

― Sym Sym (sym), Monday, 16 January 2006 00:40 (nineteen years ago)

only if!

― Dom iNut (donut), Monday, 16 January 2006 09:30 (nineteen years ago)

pardon me, yes that's a normal dad, but that's an ubsubtle difference from "him reading his Playboys in front of you". whuhhh.

I can still remember watching my dad sort his entire collection of Playboy and Oui into piles all over my bedroom when I was about seven years old. (He was selling a few things off to raise cash, the collection was rather sizable so he needed the space, and the covers were very puzzling to me at the time.) His reading the Playboys openly at home when I was a wee child was so common (like, we're talking at least once a month when the new issue came in the mail) that I can't even really remember specific instances. (Plus, he would read my comics while eating in front of the TV and roll their spines. Dammit, Dad...) And for years, the closet that "the stash" was in was the closet of my little brother's bedroom!

Shit, my grandmother still has a rather sizable oil painting of a topless Playmate hanging in her bedroom, even though my grandpa's been dead for twenty years! (This was my dad's dad, natch.) My dad may have been a trifle more clueless in his handling of this stuff than most, but Ned and donut bitch are OTFM as far as I'm concerned.

― Chris F. (servoret), Monday, 16 January 2006 10:03 (nineteen years ago)

DV OTM!

― Kv_nol (Kv_nol), Monday, 16 January 2006 12:41 (nineteen years ago)

...

It wasn't quite like that where I grew up. Dirty magazines were hidden away. I'm surprised that the smell of mildew doesn't give me a hard-on anymore.

― Pleasant Plains /// (Pleasant Plains ///), Monday, 16 January 2006 18:12 (nineteen years ago)

Bah, Playboys are not "dirty magazines"! Hugh Hefner says so!

― Chris F. (servoret), Monday, 16 January 2006 19:28 (nineteen years ago)

At least your dad didn't buy a poster of Britney Spears specifically in time for your visit, or send you cards when you were little that said, "you're almost as cute as Anna Clumsky and Christina Ricci"

― emilys. (emilys.), Monday, 16 January 2006 22:55 (nineteen years ago)

also I'm a little surprised Tuomas hasn't chimed in in defense of pervy dads

― emilys. (emilys.), Monday, 16 January 2006 22:58 (nineteen years ago)

DV TOTALLY OTM

― Dan (Fie On Puritan Dads) Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 16 January 2006 23:04 (nineteen years ago)

That's what schoolmates are for.. going to their houses so they can unleash their dads' stashes of dirty magazines when your folks don't have any.

― Dom iNut (donut), Monday, 16 January 2006 23:39 (nineteen years ago)

i knew the guitar player from project object from the #ween dalnet chat room back in the day

― howell huser (chaki), Monday, 16 January 2006 23:54 (nineteen years ago)

I think i went to school with all the guys from project object; at least, they were all floating around the University of Michigan or Ann Arbor for a while in the mid-late 90's

― kingfish kuribo's shoe (kingfish 2.0), Tuesday, 17 January 2006 00:10 (nineteen years ago)

also I'm a little surprised Tuomas hasn't chimed in in defense of pervy dads
-- emilys. (slob.gobli...), January 16th, 2006 10:58 PM. (emilys.) (later) (link)

because in a colossal twist in this tale tuomas shall emerge on this thread REVEALED AS KILLY'S DAD!

― ken c (ken c), Tuesday, 17 January 2006 00:31 (nineteen years ago)

i found my dad's stash of Penthouse FORUM magazines a couple years ago. i guess he's more into written porn than pictures. interesting, b/c i'm sort of the same way! the one issue of regular Penthouse that i found of his was the SAME EXACT ISSUE of the single Penthouse magazine that i myself own. CREEPY!!

― killy (baby lenin pin), Tuesday, 17 January 2006 19:11 (nineteen years ago)

Hey, I prefer written porn too.

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Tuesday, 17 January 2006 19:18 (nineteen years ago)

DADDY?

― killy (baby lenin pin), Tuesday, 17 January 2006 19:21 (nineteen years ago)

Proud of ya, kiddo!

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Tuesday, 17 January 2006 19:22 (nineteen years ago)

"Dear Penthouse: I never thought this would happen to me, but my daughter was going through my porn stash the other night....."

― Stephen X (Stephen X), Wednesday, 18 January 2006 04:26 (nineteen years ago)

Eww. I am kinda curious why killy owns any issues of Penthouse at all though.

― Chris F. (servoret), Wednesday, 18 January 2006 05:19 (nineteen years ago)

vagina.

― cancer prone fat guy (dubplatestyle), Wednesday, 18 January 2006 05:20 (nineteen years ago)

I've always been told that there's really good articles in Playboy.

A porn mag called "Oui" deserves a knighthood.

― adamrl (nordicskilla), Wednesday, 18 January 2006 05:23 (nineteen years ago)

Eww. I am kinda curious why killy owns any issues of Penthouse at all though.

Wait, what? Aren't us girls allowed to like porn mags? Or are you disparaging on the quality or otherwise of Penthouse in partic? ;)

― Trayce (trayce), Wednesday, 18 January 2006 05:29 (nineteen years ago)

just masturbate to nude celebrity websites like the rest of us

― cancer prone fat guy (dubplatestyle), Wednesday, 18 January 2006 05:32 (nineteen years ago)

Sory Jess, you can keep yer Fred Durst videos, I dont want em.

― Trayce (trayce), Wednesday, 18 January 2006 05:34 (nineteen years ago)

night vision porn hasn't let me down yet

― cancer prone fat guy (dubplatestyle), Wednesday, 18 January 2006 05:35 (nineteen years ago)

nellcarter.mov

― cancer prone fat guy (dubplatestyle), Wednesday, 18 January 2006 05:35 (nineteen years ago)

Yah, Trayce-- the singleton especially made it kind of weird! (I was going to ask if they were still running Milo Manara comics in the back of Penthouse but deleted it-- I can't think of any use for that mag otherwise. (Yeah yeah, I know, "vagina".)).

― Chris F. (servoret), Wednesday, 18 January 2006 05:54 (nineteen years ago)

So, Kim, you were thinking that kinda stuff wasn't normal...

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 18 January 2006 06:52 (nineteen years ago)

Eww. I am kinda curious why killy owns any issues of Penthouse at all though.

most of my porn mags are stolen from exboyfriends or guys in general, which i guess is pretty gross. i can't remember ever BUYING one. i have an old issue of High Society from the mid-90s, with an A-Z spread of nude celeb pics, including TRACY ULLMAN for U...wtf?

anyway, i'm more likely to be doin it with a laptop next to me than a magazine.

― killy (baby lenin pin), Wednesday, 18 January 2006 14:49 (nineteen years ago)

This could be the opportunity for an important bonding experience of some kind with your dad...? Perhaps you could go fishing together with a copy of the penthouse, find a nice spot, and get out the tackle.

― ratty, Wednesday, 18 January 2006 21:44 (nineteen years ago)

i think that was an afterschool special

― cancer prone fat guy (dubplatestyle), Wednesday, 18 January 2006 21:45 (nineteen years ago)

Starring Bob Crane and Dana Plato.

― Pleasant Plains /// (Pleasant Plains ///), Wednesday, 18 January 2006 22:17 (nineteen years ago)

"the opportunity for an important bonding experience of some kind with your dad..."

― ken c (ken c), Wednesday, 18 January 2006 23:24 (nineteen years ago)

oh wait i just saw the tackle bit

― ken c (ken c), Wednesday, 18 January 2006 23:24 (nineteen years ago)

one month passes...

massage is a totally legitimate and medically recognized form of prostitution

― Mr Jones (Mr Jones), Saturday, 4 March 2006 21:38 (nineteen years ago)

that gif is hypnotic. i keep hoping she'll catch the top of the door.

― mark p (Mark P), Saturday, 4 March 2006 22:13 (nineteen years ago)

massage is a totally legitimate and medically recognized form of prostitution

Do you have penises all over your body or something?

― Da Na Not! (donut), Saturday, 4 March 2006 23:30 (nineteen years ago)

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