FOOD JOEKS

Message Bookmarked

Bookmark Removed

"would you like some cheese?"

"no thanks, havarti had some."

― danielle the animal steel (Jody Beth Rosen), Sunday, 15 January 2006 22:56 (twenty years ago)

(my new new year's resolution is to only post to joek threads)

― danielle the animal steel (Jody Beth Rosen), Sunday, 15 January 2006 23:02 (twenty years ago)

"do you like coffee?"

"it's not my cup of tea"

― Slumpman (Slump Man), Sunday, 15 January 2006 23:07 (twenty years ago)

"Would you like a saltana?"

"Not at the current moment."

"Would you like a current?"

"I see no raisin why not."

― chap who would dare to work for the man (chap), Sunday, 15 January 2006 23:14 (twenty years ago)

Q. What's a vampire's favorite fruit?

A. A neck-tarine!

― Abbott (Abbott), Sunday, 15 January 2006 23:55 (twenty years ago)

"Two peanuts vere valking down the Strasse, und vone of the was ---assaulted!"

― Abbott (Abbott), Monday, 16 January 2006 00:05 (twenty years ago)

And the cabbage says "Lettuce entertain you" and the carrot's all like OH NO YOU DI'INT!

― Forksclovetofu (Forksclovetofu), Monday, 16 January 2006 06:08 (twenty years ago)

An egg and a sausage are on a frying pan. The egg says, "It sure is hot in here!", and the sausage replies, "Fuck me, a talking egg!".

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Monday, 16 January 2006 06:17 (twenty years ago)

What is green and goes up?
The anti-gravity cucumber.

― Mestema (davidcorp), Monday, 16 January 2006 13:08 (twenty years ago)

You'll have to use all caps, I'm a trifle deaf.

― Sinister Oink Kingpin (noodle vague), Monday, 16 January 2006 13:09 (twenty years ago)

what am i, CHOPPED LIVER?!

not a joke, i know, but what does this even mean?

― andrew m. (andrewmorgan), Monday, 16 January 2006 20:13 (twenty years ago)

Is that a cake or a meringue?
No, right enough, it's a cake.

― Mädchen (Madchen), Monday, 16 January 2006 20:19 (twenty years ago)

What's dangerous and yellow?
Shark-infested custard.

― Mädchen (Madchen), Monday, 16 January 2006 20:20 (twenty years ago)

How do you know an elephant's been in the fridge?
Footprints in the custard.

― Mädchen (Madchen), Monday, 16 January 2006 20:20 (twenty years ago)

What's the world's fastest cake?
Scone.

― Mädchen (Madchen), Monday, 16 January 2006 20:21 (twenty years ago)

Why did the tomato blush?
Because it saw the salad dressing.

― Mädchen (Madchen), Monday, 16 January 2006 20:21 (twenty years ago)

A duck walks into a vegetarian restaurant and sits down. The waiter comes over and asks him to leave.

"Why should I leave?"

"We don't serve duck"

― laurence kansas (lawrence kansas), Monday, 16 January 2006 20:22 (twenty years ago)

What’s the hardest part of eating your vegetables?
Getting the wheelchair down.

― Thermo Thinwall (Thermo Thinwall), Monday, 16 January 2006 20:23 (twenty years ago)

What do swiss cheese and Jesus have in common?
They are both holy.

― Mädchen (Madchen), Monday, 16 January 2006 20:26 (twenty years ago)

My little brother made this joke up when he was four:

Why did the ice cream sit on top of the refrigerator?
Because it wanted to melt.

― Abbott (Abbott), Monday, 16 January 2006 20:42 (twenty years ago)

You must be logged in to post. Please either login here, or if you are not registered, you may register here.