How do you personally respond to pictures of men with an erect penis?

Message Bookmarked

Bookmark Removed

I'm guessing almost all straight men and probably a lot of women too find the image of a naked, beautiful woman in some way sexually arousing. But a naked guy with an erection? It almost always looks silly to me, not sexy. There's just something ridiculous about it. It might look sexy if there's a woman involved too, but then the focus automatically shifts to the woman and her relationship to the man's presence.

Yes, I'm a straight male but when I see a photo of a (clothed) man who really has it, who really exudes sex appeal, I can sense it well enough, I can get the vibe. A photo of a naked guy with an erection never does that, though. I'm interested to know how people respond to such images, and why they almost always come across as ridiculous. Is ridicule some sort of way of warding off the threat of the phallus, which remains pretty taboo? Is self-exposure for the gaze of the other something we subconconsciously associate with the feminine therefore when we see it in a man it's always cheesy, unmasculine?

(This is a serious thread and although I know it'll get countless inane 'comedy' responses, I'd be grateful if you'd refrain from posting NSFW pics, or if you do want to illustrate your point post the URL rather than the pic itself.)

― Keith Lacan, Thursday, 9 February 2006 12:20 (nineteen years ago)

I feel disgust, but I have my own weird issues probably not shared by the general population.

― She's been known to sleep on piles of dry leaves... (papa november), Thursday, 9 February 2006 12:24 (nineteen years ago)

You feel disgust? But do you also feel disgust when you see a guy's erect penis before or during sex? Or is it just a pictorial thing? (Of course, I'm assuming you're straight, which may not be the case...)

― Keith Lacan, Thursday, 9 February 2006 12:31 (nineteen years ago)

Well, firstly, I'm a straight woman, and generally not turned on by pictures of "naked beautiful women" - mostly I just think "she looks cold, put some clothes on!" but it depends on the atmosphere and the setting of the picture, rather than the nudity.

WRT pictures of naked men, it depends on who the man is, the situation, the atmosphere, a million different things. I don't object to erect penises, or find them unsexy in principle or example, but sexiness, for me, depends on things other than simple medically explicit photos of body parts.

― She's In Parties (kate), Thursday, 9 February 2006 12:32 (nineteen years ago)

I'd assume this has something to do with how our culture constructs the idea's of what is attractive and what is not - the image of a naked woman is common as a signifier of erotic appeal, whereas a picture of a guy with an erect penis is so rarely seen that, outside the gay subcultures, people don't know how to handle it. I don't think there's anything implicitly unappealing about the image of an erect penis, but our culture teaches us to respond to it in adifferent way than to a female image. Also, it has to do with the different levels of visibility of the penis and the vagina. Those close-up shots of pussies in pron flicks don't look that appealing to me either, because they're sort of too crude, too bodily. On the other hand, I do find stylized pics of erect penises, like the ones drawn by Tom of Finland, to be aesthetically pleasing, but that's probably because I've familiar with such gay iconography, so I've gone through this sort of cultural decoding process. When I first saw Tom of Finland's art around the age of 12 or 13 I did find it kinda ridiculous.

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Thursday, 9 February 2006 12:38 (nineteen years ago)

In other words, our patriarchal societies have traditionally come to value women's attractiveness on the basis of her body, whereas men's appeal had been constructed through other means, though with women's lib the body has become more and more important. But it's still a different thíng.

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Thursday, 9 February 2006 12:40 (nineteen years ago)

xpost
Well I'm not really thinking of cold and clinical photos of body parts. I'm thinking of photos that are meant to be sexy, that might be artful etc. And yes I know the clichÃ© (which may well be true as well) that women are less sexually aroused by the visual than men. That said, there's still a reaction that people - both men and women have - to pictures of naked men and it tends to be derision. I wonder why that is.

(Actually I might have thought of a counter example, classical Greek imagery, those sexually explicit images on pots, often with men with erections. They don't necessarily look ridiculous.)

― Keith Lacan, Thursday, 9 February 2006 12:40 (nineteen years ago)

Also, the image of naked human being strips away most signifiers of power, and therefore makes the person look more vulnerable, but because vulnerability is something already associated with feminity it is easier to depict a naked woman, whereas to a man vulnerability is a different thing because of how masculinity is constructed.

(x-post)

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Thursday, 9 February 2006 12:43 (nineteen years ago)

I think you have a point vis-a-vis vulnerability as a female signifier.

― Keith Lacan, Thursday, 9 February 2006 12:45 (nineteen years ago)

The first time I saw Tom of Finland, I thought "oh my lord, I'm a gay man, trapped in a woman's body!" It was shocking because I'd never seen anything like it before, but at the same time I found it very attractive.

There's so little pr0n for women ... that isn't rubbish. Gay pr0n knows how to make naked, erect men actually look... enticing and, well, sexy.

― She's In Parties (kate), Thursday, 9 February 2006 12:45 (nineteen years ago)

xpost
... although the erect phallus can also be seen as threatening (although pictorially, it doesn't seem to be in our culture). Didn't Greek warriors fight in the nude?

― Keith Lacan, Thursday, 9 February 2006 12:47 (nineteen years ago)

Oh, I see. This is going to be another thread of men discussing the "mascline" and "feminine" roles, and no attention whatsoever will be paid to the actual experiences and opinion of actual women.

Carry on, then...

― She's In Parties (kate), Thursday, 9 February 2006 12:49 (nineteen years ago)

I'm sure I've seen Japanese woodcuts of men "swordfighting" with priapic penises, that did look rather sexy to my eyes.

― Forest Pines (ForestPines), Thursday, 9 February 2006 12:50 (nineteen years ago)

Yeah, I guess there could be an implicit fear of rape associated with erection pics, but I guess that depends on how the rest of the man in the pic is represented (does he look threatening?). Also, even though I don't really believe in Freud, I think some cases at least men's aversion towards such pics have to with the denial of homoerotic feelings in themselves.

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Thursday, 9 February 2006 12:52 (nineteen years ago)

(x-post)

Oh, I see. This is going to be another thread of men discussing the "mascline" and "feminine" roles, and no attention whatsoever will be paid to the actual experiences and opinion of actual women.
Carry on, then...

Who said so? I'm certainly interested in people's personal experiences, but I think these things are interesting in a general culture level as well. It's kinda hard to differentiate the two.

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Thursday, 9 February 2006 12:54 (nineteen years ago)

Oh, I see. This is going to be another thread of men discussing the "mascline" and "feminine" roles, and no attention whatsoever will be paid to the actual experiences and opinion of actual women.

Hey, I did respond to your initial post.

There's so little pr0n for women ... that isn't rubbish. Gay pr0n knows how to make naked, erect men actually look... enticing and, well, sexy.

But if women really wanted lots of pr0n with naked, erect men, wouldn't it already exist (in our market-driven world)?

― Keith Lacan, Thursday, 9 February 2006 12:55 (nineteen years ago)

I know there is porn meant for straight women too, but I've never seen it, so I'd like to know how it differs from gay porn? Are the men and their erections depicted differently?

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Thursday, 9 February 2006 12:57 (nineteen years ago)

Does anyone have a link for pr0n for straight women? I'd like to know what it looks like, and whether any women (or men) here actually find it sexy.

― Keith Lacan, Thursday, 9 February 2006 13:00 (nineteen years ago)

But that's the point - pr0n for women ISN'T necessarily photos of naked men, with erect penises. It's more situational, it's not about nudity or body parts, it's about fantasy, provoking emotions.

― She's In Parties (kate), Thursday, 9 February 2006 13:02 (nineteen years ago)

Okay, maybe I misworded that, I was just wondering about the general difference between gay porn and straight. What makes the former more enticing to you?

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Thursday, 9 February 2006 13:09 (nineteen years ago)

I know porn for straight men is pretty much about the physical act and nothing more, but I'd assume porn for straight women would be more about fantasy, emotionality, or am I wrong?

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Thursday, 9 February 2006 13:10 (nineteen years ago)

Straight porn is almost exclusively for men, it is aimed at the visual objectification of women. I don't find women sexually arousing. Gay porn is aimed at the visual objectificiation of men. I find men sexually arousing, therefore gay porn, on a purely physical level, is better than straight porn.

Porn *for* women... well, a great deal of it is traditionally just all that Mills and Boon stuff. That generally just doesn't do it for me. I've read some newer womens erotica/porn - Black Lace and that kind of thing - and it's generally too focused purely on the act, and not on the atmosphere. To *my* tastes, it seems too modelled on male porn.

― She's In Parties (kate), Thursday, 9 February 2006 13:13 (nineteen years ago)

I'm sorry if I'm being ignorant, but what's "Mills & Boon"?

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Thursday, 9 February 2006 13:16 (nineteen years ago)

x-post, yeah, that's pretty much the idea. Lots of "womens porn" I've read is just a poor copy of male porn, the physical act. Which I find as boring as a clinician's manual.

Lots of what actually gets women off, is not what men would consider porn at all. Boybands, fan fiction - there's a whole subgenre of womens' porn which is just about angst. It has next to no sex at all, but it's pure emotional pornography, men being vulnerable *emotionally*, being distraught or upset - which is much more erotic to women than the traditional "here is a person (male) being vulnerable by being nekkid" aspect of straight porn.

(Mills and Boone (probably mispelled) is womens romance novels - soft porn at best, bodice rippers, that sort of thing.)

― She's In Parties (kate), Thursday, 9 February 2006 13:17 (nineteen years ago)

what porn do lesibians read?

― ken c (ken c), Thursday, 9 February 2006 13:18 (nineteen years ago)

'read'

― Sororah T Massacre (blueski), Thursday, 9 February 2006 13:18 (nineteen years ago)

maybe some erotic novelists would be offended at being classed as 'porn', ha.

― Sororah T Massacre (blueski), Thursday, 9 February 2006 13:19 (nineteen years ago)

men being vulnerable *emotionally*, being distraught or upset - which is much more erotic to women

and presumably this can be completely detached from any notion of maternalism.

― Sororah T Massacre (blueski), Thursday, 9 February 2006 13:20 (nineteen years ago)

not only novels get "read"

― ken c (ken c), Thursday, 9 February 2006 13:20 (nineteen years ago)

(For purposes of this discussion, I am classifying porn as "anything that gets you sexually excited" - perhaps I should use different terminology.)

((Lesbian porn is a completely different kettle of fish. I read quite a lot when I was younger, it tended to either be astonishingly perverted or indecipherable))

― She's In Parties (kate), Thursday, 9 February 2006 13:21 (nineteen years ago)

x-post - Vulnerable = AVAILABLE. I don't think it's anything to do with maternalism. I mean, why do men want their nekkid women porn to be vulnerable? It's not like they're going to mother them.

― She's In Parties (kate), Thursday, 9 February 2006 13:21 (nineteen years ago)

I wish the other Kate would come back because I am just one woman, and, unlike Momus, I feel very uncomfortable making broad sweeping generalisations for ALL womankind based on my personal experiences.

― She's In Parties (kate), Thursday, 9 February 2006 13:23 (nineteen years ago)

'pornography' and 'emotions' seem like a very odd mix to me - but that could easily be dismissed as 'being a man'!

― Sororah T Massacre (blueski), Thursday, 9 February 2006 13:23 (nineteen years ago)

you seem to be doing quite well at it though!

xpoost

― ken c (ken c), Thursday, 9 February 2006 13:24 (nineteen years ago)

I mean, why do men want their nekkid women porn to be vulnerable? It's not like they're going to mother them.

I wouldn't completely rule out some kind of equivalent if perhaps warped paternal aspect though.

― Sororah T Massacre (blueski), Thursday, 9 February 2006 13:25 (nineteen years ago)

There's a Mapplethorpe picture of a black guy with a synthetic suit (I think) and his penis on the table. Something like that. I find it quite beautiful.

This is semi-apropos of nothing, right?

― Nathalie (stevie nixed), Thursday, 9 February 2006 13:26 (nineteen years ago)

There's the idea that naked = vulnerable by default, for both men and women. But I suppose it really depends what sort of position they're in, environment and facial expression too. These can be set so that vulnerability is overshadowed by courage, bravery, pride etc. - which are all seen as arousing too, often.

― Sororah T Massacre (blueski), Thursday, 9 February 2006 13:27 (nineteen years ago)

lol @ "semi"!!!

― ken c (ken c), Thursday, 9 February 2006 13:28 (nineteen years ago)

i didn't think you'd get a lol on a thread about erect penises.

― Sororah T Massacre (blueski), Thursday, 9 February 2006 13:28 (nineteen years ago)

These can be set so that vulnerability is overshadowed by courage, bravery, pride etc.

can i borrow some of this porn you have? it sounds ace!

― ken c (ken c), Thursday, 9 February 2006 13:29 (nineteen years ago)

xpost no i just get a semi!

― ken c (ken c), Thursday, 9 February 2006 13:30 (nineteen years ago)

in the cold light of day, on a screen or on paper, the majority of vaginas are rather grotesque too. its only when it really matters, so to speak, that genitalia looks yummy.

― mint, Thursday, 9 February 2006 13:32 (nineteen years ago)

the thing i never really understood about a lot of porn is the focus on the genitals. if that makes sense.

― Sororah T Massacre (blueski), Thursday, 9 February 2006 13:33 (nineteen years ago)

it's where the money is innit. it's like explosions in an action movie

― ken c (ken c), Thursday, 9 February 2006 13:35 (nineteen years ago)

more like the corpses.

― mint, Thursday, 9 February 2006 13:37 (nineteen years ago)

in a zombie movie yes

― ken c (ken c), Thursday, 9 February 2006 13:38 (nineteen years ago)

No-one has made any mention of making comparisons yet?

― Markelby (Mark C), Thursday, 9 February 2006 13:41 (nineteen years ago)

PHWOAR

http://www.aboutbritain.com/images/towns/CerneAbbas1.jpg

― Sororah T Massacre (blueski), Thursday, 9 February 2006 13:45 (nineteen years ago)

i wouldn't try to compare yourself to him, btw

― Sororah T Massacre (blueski), Thursday, 9 February 2006 13:45 (nineteen years ago)

How do you personally respond to pictures of men with an erect penis?

dash off an angry letter to the editor, usually. never does any good though

― Thomas Tallis (Tommy), Thursday, 9 February 2006 13:47 (nineteen years ago)

Is that a hookah he's waving?

― mark grout (mark grout), Thursday, 9 February 2006 13:50 (nineteen years ago)

How do you personally respond to pictures of men with an erect penis?

Quite happily. I'm a straight female, and have always enjoyed looking at naked/semi-naked guys (also naked/semi-naked women who aren't too artificial). Don't send me any though, I'll find my own, thanks.

― Jaq (Jaq), Thursday, 9 February 2006 13:53 (nineteen years ago)

PHWOAR

Archaeologists' porn!!!!!

― Forest Pines (ForestPines), Thursday, 9 February 2006 13:58 (nineteen years ago)

lol @ "semi"!!!

I don't understand what's funny about my semi comment. :-(

― Nathalie (stevie nixed), Thursday, 9 February 2006 14:05 (nineteen years ago)

half-mast yo.

― mint, Thursday, 9 February 2006 14:27 (nineteen years ago)

I'm tempted to write "straight guy in thinking hardon pics kinda weird and unsexy SHOCKAH" and leave it at that. But if you want more hypothesis than that:

The phallus has many faces: powerful or vulnerable; "cool'n'sexy" or ridiculous. The potential for silliness here comes from the fact that erections are somewhat involuntary changes in a body part --a body part that, more than others, seems to "have a mind of its own", and at full mast especially seems like an accessory that is not of one piece with the rest of the body. In that sense, the hardon is like a garish flag signalling various internal states (horniness, the need to go pee in the morning, etc...), whether the custodian of that flag wishes to make such announcements or not.

Now, naked guys with hardons can look v. sexy to many, but if you're not particularly attracted to men (or feel shame about the genitals) in the first place, this potential sexiness can get overshadowed by the absurdity potential.

― Collardio Gelatinous (collardio), Thursday, 9 February 2006 16:09 (nineteen years ago)

Indeed.

http://de.fishki.net/picsn/podbor15_40.jpg

― StanM (StanM), Thursday, 9 February 2006 17:53 (nineteen years ago)

classic: professional portrait of ripped guy with large, but mostly flaccid schlong.

dud: picture of some pasty guy sitting in a computer chair gripping his unimpressive erection.

― straight, believe it or not, Thursday, 9 February 2006 17:59 (nineteen years ago)

As a straight married man in his 50s, my reaction holds the least interest of any that will be offered, but since you asked... My main response is "Oh. A naked guy with an erect penis. Again."

― Aimless (Aimless), Thursday, 9 February 2006 18:16 (nineteen years ago)

you mean mirrors : c/d??

xpost

― ken c (ken c), Thursday, 9 February 2006 18:16 (nineteen years ago)

"Oh. A naked guy with an erect penis. Again."

"Why, back in the navy used to see them all the time..."

Sorry.

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Thursday, 9 February 2006 18:18 (nineteen years ago)

See ken c's xpost.

― Aimless (Aimless), Thursday, 9 February 2006 18:19 (nineteen years ago)

Am I the only one who thinks that sometimes seeing yourself in the mirror with a boner can be a turn-on?

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Thursday, 9 February 2006 18:22 (nineteen years ago)

Oh wait, this is ILX, I know the answer I'll get...

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Thursday, 9 February 2006 18:23 (nineteen years ago)

Depends whose boner, I suppose.

― StanM (StanM), Thursday, 9 February 2006 18:28 (nineteen years ago)

(something like that?)

― StanM (StanM), Thursday, 9 February 2006 18:28 (nineteen years ago)

HOW DO I INSTALL TURNING-ON WOMEN XP, PLEASE EMAIL THANK YOU

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Thursday, 9 February 2006 18:31 (nineteen years ago)

the funny thing about this question is that straight porn is chockablock (cockablock?) with erect penises, and that there's a preference for big ones. the standard explanation is that the big dicks in porn serve as a surrogate for the viewer, but the bottom line is still that straight guys who watch porn are jacking off to an awful lot of images of erect penises. it's taken to its most absurd extreme with bukkake, where the penis-to-vagina ratio is ridiculously high, but as long as there's one woman in the room it still counts as "straight porn."

― gypsy mothra (gypsy mothra), Thursday, 9 February 2006 18:58 (nineteen years ago)

ihttps://www.fleshlight.com/main/images/482x321/lg_limpy.jpg

Cocks are Teh Cuet!

Mr Limpy! : https://www.fleshlight.com/main/product_info.php?products_id=36?ref=54586

― Merryweather (scarlet), Thursday, 9 February 2006 19:01 (nineteen years ago)

aw.

― Merryweather (scarlet), Thursday, 9 February 2006 19:02 (nineteen years ago)

they look like a bunch of multicolored maggots.

― AaronK (AaronK), Thursday, 9 February 2006 19:04 (nineteen years ago)

the question made me think of day two of my greek drama class freshman year: slide after slide of statues of men and mythical creatures with erect penises as long as their thighs and a lecture on costuming in lysistrata and comedy in general (thigh-length strap-ons for all actors). so in that case, there's clearly a cultural basis (and tradition, even) for exaggerating it and making it funny rather than threatening or sexy or whatever.

― Maria (Maria), Thursday, 9 February 2006 19:05 (nineteen years ago)

But that's the point - pr0n for women ISN'T necessarily photos of naked men, with erect penises. It's more situational, it's not about nudity or body parts, it's about fantasy, provoking emotions.

I can't relate to this at all. I like to see naked people having sex. I can't be bothered thinking up some emotional fantasy every time I want a quick orgasm.

― a female ilxor, Thursday, 9 February 2006 19:36 (nineteen years ago)

I like erect penises.

― jaymc (jaymc), Thursday, 9 February 2006 19:43 (nineteen years ago)

http://home.earthlink.net/~suzaplants/suzaimages/clownblooms.jpg

― StanM (StanM), Thursday, 9 February 2006 19:45 (nineteen years ago)

Am I the only one who thinks that sometimes seeing yourself in the mirror with a boner can be a turn-on?

but surely when you already have a boner...

― ken c (ken c), Thursday, 9 February 2006 19:48 (nineteen years ago)

Anyway, you're not, Tuomas.

― jaymc (jaymc), Thursday, 9 February 2006 19:52 (nineteen years ago)

No indeed.

― Collardio Gelatinous (collardio), Thursday, 9 February 2006 20:09 (nineteen years ago)

I'm straight and I'd much rather look at naked women/lesbian couplings than anything else. Not remotely interested in homoerotic porn, not at all (to the point that I am baffled by many older female friends' love of things like potter slash fanfic etc). I think wangs are kinda unattractive, truth be told.

I dont imagine I'm the usual, however.

― tr4yce (trayce), Friday, 10 February 2006 02:44 (nineteen years ago)

I say "thanks for these pics of men with erect penises!" and then go home and masturbate.

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Friday, 10 February 2006 04:11 (nineteen years ago)

But you say that to everything, Alex.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 10 February 2006 04:25 (nineteen years ago)

I'm polite, what can I say.

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Friday, 10 February 2006 04:49 (nineteen years ago)

BERLIN (Reuters) - Hundreds of fans of German soccer club Borussia Dortmund
waved huge inflatable penises at local rivals Schalke 04 on Saturday above an
abusive message for their hosts.

The pink blow-ups and a huge banner in Dortmund's yellow and black suggesting
Schalke fans should procreate with themselves added a splash of color to the
dour 0-0 draw between the two Bundesliga sides.

Schalke's stadium in the Ruhr Valley city of Gelsenkirchen will host four
group matches and a quarter-final at the World Cup in Germany in June and July.

― Sl (sgh), Friday, 10 February 2006 07:34 (nineteen years ago)

You must be logged in to post. Please either login here, or if you are not registered, you may register here.