How does someone end up that close to your car anyway? I mean, assuming I'm parked correctly, how does someone pull in that close and not notice, "Hey, that guy's not going to be able to get into his car? Oh well!"
― phil d. (Phil D.), Thursday, 2 March 2006 23:10 (nineteen years ago)
(Always a truck, it seemed.)
― Pleasant Plains /// (Pleasant Plains ///), Thursday, 2 March 2006 23:14 (nineteen years ago)
― ryan (ryan), Thursday, 2 March 2006 23:16 (nineteen years ago)
― phil d. (Phil D.), Thursday, 2 March 2006 23:19 (nineteen years ago)
― Jaq (Jaq), Thursday, 2 March 2006 23:32 (nineteen years ago)
― naus (Robert T), Thursday, 2 March 2006 23:40 (nineteen years ago)
― gear (gear), Thursday, 2 March 2006 23:42 (nineteen years ago)
HAHAHAHAHAH!
i've done this a couple of times. best one - which i stole - is "thanks. next time you park next to me i'll bring a fucking can-opener, shall i?"
i also left a supremely snotty note for some dick in a BMW who parked across two bays in a car park that was all but full. "you might drive a BMW, but you don't have to be a cunt", i think it said.
(apologies to any BMW owners out there.)
― grimly fiendish (grimlord), Thursday, 2 March 2006 23:51 (nineteen years ago)
― Adam Rice Lacucaracha (nordicskilla), Thursday, 2 March 2006 23:53 (nineteen years ago)
― Adam Rice Lacucaracha (nordicskilla), Thursday, 2 March 2006 23:59 (nineteen years ago)
― Jaq (Jaq), Friday, 3 March 2006 00:02 (nineteen years ago)
I wrote them a note that said only GO YELLOWJACKETS. Oh, it was so hilarious.
― Pleasant Plains /// (Pleasant Plains ///), Friday, 3 March 2006 00:13 (nineteen years ago)
― grimly fiendish (grimlord), Friday, 3 March 2006 00:18 (nineteen years ago)
― viborgu, Friday, 3 March 2006 00:32 (nineteen years ago)
OTOH, a housemate of mine left a nasty note on some woman's car for "taking up two space" -- on the street. We tried to explain to him that our street was not actually divided into "spaces," that cars vary in size, and that the woman probably parked the way she did because of the way the other cars were parked at the time.
― Abbadavid Berman (Hurting), Friday, 3 March 2006 00:39 (nineteen years ago)
Dear Car User:
You have parked your vehicle in a manner that frivolously misuses the very limited amount of street parking space that we have to share in the Stevens neighborhood, and/or fails to respect the needs of other car owners. It would be wonderful if we could all park however we wanted; however, that is not the reality we are living in.
In the future, please make the following adjustments to your parking style when in this area: [space for handwritten notes]
Your vehicle make, model and license number have been recorded for our reference.
Sincerely,Stevens Community Awareness and Resource Education
― xero (xero), Friday, 3 March 2006 05:45 (nineteen years ago)
― oops (Oops), Friday, 3 March 2006 05:53 (nineteen years ago)
she was none too pleased. this is another thread really, but still. i've gotten to the point where if people are standing in hallways or doorways in crowds i simply say "excuse me" while actually gently moving them aside. if they get offended, i mean fuck it, this is new york goddamn city not mayberry.
― Sterling Clover (s_clover), Friday, 3 March 2006 06:10 (nineteen years ago)
Love it! But I'm judicious about it, to be close enough to get the treatment you'd have to
a) Be double-parked, over the line and into the space where my car already is;b) Have attempted to park an SUV in a space marked "Compact"; orc) Be right on the line, but with more than enough space on your other side that you could have corrected it AND have bumper stickers which endorse beliefs or sentiments that I do not agree with.
― naus (Robert T), Friday, 3 March 2006 07:58 (nineteen years ago)
they both stop dead, she turns around, sort of mutters something like "huh?" i figure, whatever, there's no more than a few scratches, i'll let it alone. so i duck back inside my car to finish my phone conversation. but in my rear-view mirror i see the couple still standing in the middle of the parking lot, talking to each other. i believe i can make out the guy saying something like, "what did he say to you? WHAT DID HE SAY TO YOU?" and the woman being like, "oh, bart*, honey, don't worry--" (*it was a middle-aged person's name like bart). then i notice the guy sort of adopting this macho posture and starting to walk over to my car. "WHAT DID YOU SAY TO MY WIFE?!" so i put the phone down again, begin to turn around with a strange look on my face, stick my head slightly out of the window, and say something like, "you guys hit my car, but nevermind.... it's OK." "DID YOU SAY SOMETHING TO MY WIFE?!" from afar: "bart, just c'mon."
he just sort of stands a few feet from my car attempting this sort of "you insulted my wife's honor!" look on his face for about 20 seconds, then finally walks away. all this from a gray-haired couple in a BMW!
i hate driving.
― amateurist0, Friday, 3 March 2006 08:27 (nineteen years ago)
― amateurist0, Friday, 3 March 2006 08:29 (nineteen years ago)
No, this was in Arlington, VA, in the garage beneath my office.
I can't decide what's better: The deliciously profane notes or the witheringly sarcastic ones. I'm not there to see either reaction, and the profane ones feel viscerally better, but still. In the aforementioned double-parking-after-the-blizzard incident, I left one that said, "Oh, parking spaces have suddenly become so plentiful here that you can take up as many as you like, have they?"
And YES YES YES about the escalators.
― phil d. (Phil D.), Friday, 3 March 2006 12:38 (nineteen years ago)
― Dave will do (dave225.3), Friday, 3 March 2006 14:24 (nineteen years ago)
― o. nate (onate), Friday, 3 March 2006 15:19 (nineteen years ago)
― Abbadavid Berman (Hurting), Friday, 3 March 2006 15:23 (nineteen years ago)
― the kit! (g-kit), Friday, 3 March 2006 15:25 (nineteen years ago)
I'd throw in the insincere "Apologies to any BMW and Lexus drivers on ILX" caveat except I really doubt any of you are driving beemers or Lexuses.
I don't have a driver's licence so I have never ever had to worry about this car parking bonzanza but I do remember my mother always getting infuriated with people in AZ who would buy brandy new trucks and then park them SIDEWAYS in a parking lot. WTF is that??? Also good: old people in giant mobile homes who seem to feel it is appropriate to park them in the front of the supermarket blocking the entire driving lane much less 3 parking spots.
― Allyzay Rofflesberger (allyzay), Friday, 3 March 2006 15:30 (nineteen years ago)
Sadly, not true!
― R.I.P. Concrete Octopus ]-`: (ex machina), Friday, 3 March 2006 15:33 (nineteen years ago)
One day I did this, on a street with plenty of empty parking spaces (seeing as the houses all had garages, and it was the middle of a weekday), and returned to find that the woman who'd been unloading her car near me while I'd parked had left me a note: "[Street name] is NOT parking for DU students!!!!! PARK SOMEWHERE ELSE!!!!!" that last bit all triple underlined, and the ballpoint had almost torn the paper, she must've been so incensed at my legal 2-hour-long parking. I saved it, since it made me laugh and I'd been having a shitty day.
― sgs (sgs), Friday, 3 March 2006 15:46 (nineteen years ago)
Anyway. I've got a buddy who takes the most perverse thrill in parking right next to these guys, just to fuck with 'em.
― Pleasant Plains /// (Pleasant Plains ///), Friday, 3 March 2006 17:22 (nineteen years ago)
― Laurel (Laurel), Friday, 3 March 2006 17:26 (nineteen years ago)
To be fair, my dad should be locked up, the way he drives.
― Adam Rice Lacucaracha (nordicskilla), Friday, 3 March 2006 17:32 (nineteen years ago)
― Abbott (Abbott), Friday, 3 March 2006 18:16 (nineteen years ago)
― Allyzay Rofflesberger (allyzay), Friday, 3 March 2006 18:17 (nineteen years ago)
― Colin Meeder (Mert), Friday, 3 March 2006 18:33 (nineteen years ago)
In many European countries (notably Italy) this is how you create a parking space, not leave one :)
― Si.C@rter (SiC@rter), Friday, 3 March 2006 18:46 (nineteen years ago)
in the very crowded panera parking lot in alexandria, every parking space is marked compact. yet every single person who parks there is driving an suv.
― Mary (Mary), Friday, 3 March 2006 23:09 (nineteen years ago)
― art school vandal (f. hazel), Saturday, 4 March 2006 00:01 (nineteen years ago)
― Jaq (Jaq), Saturday, 4 March 2006 00:42 (nineteen years ago)
― Pleasant Plains /// (Pleasant Plains ///), Saturday, 4 March 2006 00:56 (nineteen years ago)
"Hey there, this isn't a common parking space, Thanks. PS - nice car"
Also, for a while years ago, I would see on other cars (I have never received a "note") a business card with Mickey Mouse giving the finger followed by the text "nice parking job assh*le." I wondered at the time where I could get a stack.
― I'm from Hollywood, Saturday, 4 March 2006 01:15 (nineteen years ago)
― Beth Parker (Beth Parker), Saturday, 4 March 2006 01:49 (nineteen years ago)
― art school vandal (f. hazel), Saturday, 4 March 2006 03:30 (nineteen years ago)
― Jaq (Jaq), Saturday, 4 March 2006 04:33 (nineteen years ago)
― jayden, Saturday, 4 March 2006 08:07 (nineteen years ago)
― caitlin oh no (caitxa1), Sunday, 5 March 2006 04:12 (nineteen years ago)
― Mickey (modestmickey), Sunday, 5 March 2006 05:05 (nineteen years ago)
when i was in high school (back in the late 80s), these things were pretty common! though i may be aware of them b/c i may have been the asshole who got one of them for my teenaged parking.
― Eisbär (llamasfur), Sunday, 5 March 2006 05:28 (nineteen years ago)
http://www.evolvefish.com/fish/media/E-Darwin5.gif
always cheers me up.
― grimly fiendish (grimlord), Sunday, 5 March 2006 12:34 (nineteen years ago)
― Beth Parker (Beth Parker), Sunday, 5 March 2006 13:54 (nineteen years ago)
This is pretty much wrong. BMWs are consistently rated as outstanding performance luxury cars (emphasis on the word performance), but the fit and finish is somewhat lacking. Lexus are thought of as extremely well made, quiet, near perfect fit and finish, but boring. Mercedes have been dogged with quality issues in the last five years and don't offer much on the performance side.
If you want a peformance luxury sedan, BMW is the best choice. The 3 series has been on Car & Drivers Ten Best List for like 15 years running.
― Super Cub (Debito), Sunday, 5 March 2006 14:19 (nineteen years ago)
― Beth Parker (Beth Parker), Sunday, 5 March 2006 14:32 (nineteen years ago)
― Jeff Wright (JeffW1858), Monday, 6 March 2006 03:51 (nineteen years ago)
― Trayce (trayce), Monday, 6 March 2006 06:31 (nineteen years ago)
People who complain about blocked driveways almost always can easily and effortlessly get out out of their driveways, but feel the need to write a note anyway.
― polyphonic (polyphonic), Monday, 6 March 2006 06:35 (nineteen years ago)
Yes, most of us realize that it follows the local auto traffic patterns IDIOT.
― R.I.P. Concrete Octopus ]-`: (ex machina), Monday, 6 March 2006 06:56 (nineteen years ago)
― Beth Parker (Beth Parker), Tuesday, 7 March 2006 02:57 (nineteen years ago)
― Sterling Clover (s_clover), Tuesday, 7 March 2006 03:01 (nineteen years ago)
― account settings (account), Tuesday, 7 March 2006 03:25 (nineteen years ago)
uh, not true?
― ~wj, Tuesday, 7 March 2006 04:58 (nineteen years ago)
― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Tuesday, 7 March 2006 06:10 (nineteen years ago)
― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Tuesday, 7 March 2006 06:27 (nineteen years ago)
Um. I believe one stands on the right on escalators in the UK, where they drive on the left. But thanks for playing, nobface.
― Trayce (trayce), Tuesday, 7 March 2006 07:00 (nineteen years ago)
― Forest Pines (ForestPines), Tuesday, 7 March 2006 08:57 (nineteen years ago)
― Gerard (Gerard), Tuesday, 7 March 2006 11:13 (nineteen years ago)
― Markelby (Mark C), Tuesday, 7 March 2006 11:22 (nineteen years ago)
― Dave will do (dave225.3), Tuesday, 7 March 2006 12:49 (nineteen years ago)
"[Street name] is NOT parking for DU students!!!!! PARK SOMEWHERE ELSE!!!!!" that last bit all triple underlined, and the ballpoint had almost torn the paper, she must've been so incensed at my legal 2-hour-long parking.
Almost exactly the same thing happened to me once. I was visiting a friend in her apartment, which had no visitor parking, so I parked, perfectly legally, on a street which contained very few cars. When I arrived back to my car later that night (and it was 9pm when I parked, so I reckon anyone coming home from work would have been home already, and I didn't even park near the houses, but at an empty green space towards the end of the street) there was a note on my car that told me in no uncertain terms that I was being watched and that if I ever parked my car there again, there would be CONSEQUENCES!!!!! I was really embarrassed about it and got quite upset that I had pissed someone off so badly, but then I realised it was a public roadway and I had done absolutely nothing wrong at all. They even put the note into a clear plastic wrapper, in case it got rained on. Fucking loons.
― accentmonkey (accentmonkey), Tuesday, 7 March 2006 14:02 (nineteen years ago)
In Boston there was a neighborhood controversy over people leaving lawn chairs and such in parking spaces they had shoveled out. They figured that once they'd put in that amount of work, the parking space was THEIRS. They would be wrong. The city collected all the lawn chairs and gave them to charity.
― Beth Parker (Beth Parker), Tuesday, 7 March 2006 14:43 (nineteen years ago)
My friend in highschool shat in a sportscar (driver's seat) that belonged to a narc.
― steve ketchup (steve ketchup), Tuesday, 7 March 2006 17:01 (nineteen years ago)
this has made me smile for the first time in two hours.
― grimly fiendish (grimlord), Tuesday, 7 March 2006 21:28 (nineteen years ago)
― Eisbär (llamasfur), Tuesday, 7 March 2006 22:09 (nineteen years ago)
― Mary (Mary), Tuesday, 7 March 2006 22:41 (nineteen years ago)
ANd be sure to carefully re-read that last sentence. lives down the street vs next-door neighbor. THEY DON'T EVEN LIVE IN THE HOUSE THAT [allegedly] GETS "HIT".
The next door neighbor has said not one word to me since I moved in nearly five years ago.
― Pleasant Plains /// (Pleasant Plains ///), Tuesday, 7 March 2006 22:58 (nineteen years ago)
Accentmonkey, pardon. Not that Trayce isn't an excellent ilxor to be confused with. And not that she, too, shouldn't lie in wait for them.
― Beth Parker (Beth Parker), Tuesday, 7 March 2006 23:07 (nineteen years ago)
― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Tuesday, 7 March 2006 23:08 (nineteen years ago)
I accept your pardon. I did seriously consider lying in wait for them, but guess what? Not only is my life too short to leave plastic-wrapped notes on the cars of people who are not in any way inconveniencing me, I am also too bustling and full-lived to argue with such people.
Perhaps I am too nice. I am one of those people who would tell my friends not to park in other people's "spaces" on a public road if I was having visitors. If I'm going to my parents house for a big occasion and I know that lots of older and less able people will be following on later, I'll park further away from the house to give them more room.
Jesus, I'm Laura Ingalls.
― accentmonkey (accentmonkey), Tuesday, 7 March 2006 23:18 (nineteen years ago)
amateurist, i cant believe you let bart get away with that.
― phil-two (phil-two), Wednesday, 8 March 2006 01:08 (nineteen years ago)
― Pork Cheops (willpie), Wednesday, 8 March 2006 01:59 (nineteen years ago)