BEHOLD... THE ATHEIST'S NIGHTMARE

WE'RE THE FUNGUS, MAN. WE'RE the fungus.

I think I know what RJG means about mangos. There's something recalcitrant about them.

xpost perhaps they are agents of Satan because they are so delicious?

xpost hahaha.

Sometimes I will pull the tab on a banana and the thing just bends backwards. So I keep pulling, and a seam pops open on the opposite side, and when I finally get in there it's mush city. On those days I say, "God is truly dead."

xpost yes that happens to me quite regularly, the mush banana thing.

- mike hanley

it's just the right shape for the human mouth!

completely otm

Benny Hinn: "Adam was a superbeing when God created him. I don’t know whether people even know this, but he was the first superman that ever lived. First of all, the Scriptures declare clearly that he had dominion over the fowls of the air, the fish of the sea, which means he used to fly."

Jan Crouch: "Wow!"

Benny Hinn: "Of course, how can you have dominion over the birds and not be able to do what they do?"

Jan Crouch: "Whoa, I mean, wait a minute. Benny, wait a minute."

Benny Hinn: "I’ll prove it to you. The word dominion in the Hebrew clearly declares that, if you have dominion over a subject, you can do everything that subject does. In other words, that subject, if it does something that you cannot do, you don’t have dominion over it. I’ll prove it further. Adam not only flew, he flew to space. With one thought, he’d be on the moon."

that really is the gayest shit I've seen since I caught a glimpse of my belly while getting out of the shower this morning

-- like murderinging (modestmickey), Monday, May 8, 2006 5:07 PM (1 year ago) Bookmark Link

A world dictator is coming on the scene. My! He's a short man. He's a short man. I see a short man who's a perfect incarnation of Satan. (Tongues)

But here's first what I see for TBN. You're going to have people raised from the dead watching this network. You're going to have people raised from the dead watching TBN. Programs -- just plain programs -- programs that haven't done much when it comes to supernatural manifestations -- teaching programs!"

- Benny Hinn, October 19, 1999 Praise The Lord, Trinity Broadcasting Network

Okay that Benny Hinn bit is gold. I don't think even Jack Chick's gone that far.

oh there's way more to that last one i guess

Benny Hinn: But here's first what I see for TBN. You're going to have people raised from the dead watching this network. You're going to have people raised from the dead watching TBN. Programs - just plain programs - programs that haven't done much when it comes to supernatural manifestations - teaching programs. It's not going to be a Benny Hinn saying, "Stretch your hands." It's going to be your average teaching program, your normal Christian program, that's blessing the church. There's going to be such power on these programs people will be raised from the dead worldwide. I'm telling you, I see this in the Spirit. It's going to be so awesome - Jesus I give you praise for this - that people around the world - maybe not so much in America - people around the world who will lose loved ones, will say to undertakers "Not yet. I want to take my dead loved one and place him in front of that TV set for 24 hours."

Paul Crouch: Benny Hinn! Jesus!

Benny Hinn: I'm telling you. People will be - people - I'm telling you, I feel the anointing talking here. People are going to be canceling funeral services and bringing their dead in their caskets, placing them - my God! I feel the anointing here - placing them before a television set, waiting for God's power to come through and touch them. And it's going to happen time and time - so much it's going to spread. You're going to hear it from Kenya to Mexico to Europe to South America, where people will be raised from the - so much so that the word will spread that if some dead person be put in front of this TV screen, they will be raised from the dead and they will be by the thousands. You wait. Now the Lord just told me - and I don't know whether this is true or not - as I'm saying this, the Lord said He gave you that word many, many years ago.

Paul Crouch: I have said that, yes.

Benny Hinn: I don't remember you saying that to me ever.

Paul Crouch: No, I didn't.

Benny Hinn: [He said] 'I've told him this already.'

Paul Crouch: Yeah, the Lord spoke that to me in the very beginning of TBN and I didn't really -

Jan Crouch: And I had a dream.

Benny Hinn: You had a dream.

Paul Crouch: Yeah, tell him about that little -

Jan Crouch: That's just a dream - people were being raised from the dead. Years ago.

Paul Crouch: It's on tape. I said the day is coming -

Benny Hinn: I see quite something amazing. I see rows of caskets lining up in front of this TV set and I see them bringing them closer to the TV set and as people are coming closer I see actually loved ones picking up the hands of the dead and letting them touch the screen and people are getting raised as their hands are touching that screen.

...With this program - I'm not talking about my program - I'm talking programs, plain programs aired - the glory of God will be so on TBN that there's going to be divine resurrection happening as people bring their loved ones to the TV set.

Paul Crouch: Just because it's His time.

Benny Hinn: It's His time. Now here's something else I see. Jesus, I give You praise for this, I give You praise for this, I give You praise for this - the day will come, Paul - and I pray you'll be here. I pray the Lord will allow you to be here and see it. I mean, physically be here. You're in your 60s now. But the day is going to come when the gifts of the Holy Spirit will so intensify in the church that young children will be watching TBN and signs and wonders will begin to take place through them. Impartations of the Spirit will come to them. A little child that knows nothing about the gifts, knows nothing about the anointing, knows nothing about the power of God, will be imbued with power from on high as a child, as that TV set comes on, and will go out like fire torches to their schools and their playgrounds and their families. I see children, I see children, what looks like fire in their lips spreading - but I see these kids touching the TV set, receiving it, and going out and spreading it. And it's going to happen with children in the U.S., Canada, all over the world. And I do see people being raised from the dead here, but I see masses of them overseas. (Praise The Lord, Trinity Broadcasting Network, October 19, 1999)

Paul Crouch: Benny Hinn! Jesus!

http://www.americanfundamentalists.com/cast/images/crouch.jpg

http://www.tbn.org/about/newsletter/0006/000609.jpg

I have allways Liked G.W. Bush.
ANd thats because I do not burry my head in the sand and just join the mindless blame Bush croud.
President Bush is up against alot more than just those who appose him in Washington.
Why do you think the Worldly of the World and the Muslims and libs and everyone including the Devil hates him so much?
Isnt it clear that George W Bush stands for Something That the prince of this world hates.
George Bush is all alone at the top like a lightning Rod to take the heat for everything going wrong in the world.
ANd everyone who uses common sence knows that all these things began Long before Bush became preasident.

People who go around blaming Bush and Hating Bush make me sick bacause they are so non thinking that it would be useless to try to reason with them.

FIrst of all Bush is one man.
He is president of the United states wich is a very very limited position of power.
He is very powerful yes but you would be very surprised to stand in his shoes and see just how limited his power actually is.

I have allway's known that the ones who hold the power on this planet are not even human.
They are sentiant beings that are thousands of years old and The Bible has many things to say about their leader.
they know all to well how to exploit human fear and how to redirect blame for all the ill's of the world right back on the Lord himself and anyone who Stands
for what's rite.

In the Human realm their has allways been a secret group of old men that control the worlds currencies and they do things like start wars by shifting large amounts of currency from one place to the next.
ANd they put up dictators and thay buy presidencies.

call them the Illuminatie or whatever ...they are real.

I want everyone reading this to know that anyone who Hates G.W. Bush is
rite in line with the Devil himself.

so try to think and use some common sence before your to quike to place the blame on Bush.

Ephesians 6:12 For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.

I like that you mention the Illuminati because your text reads like a portion of the Principia Discordia.

exploit human fear, start wars, put up dictators... very mysterious who this group might be.

Benny Hinn is a truly vacuous farmer of cock. I rather hate the fact that I have done work for TBN.

wasn't Benny Hinn one of the dudes who got exposed by some Dateline style show for throwing away prayer requests & having a radio earpiece in so he could get information about people in the crowd from his ushers?

Benny Hinn is a truly vacuous farmer of cock. I rather hate the fact that I have done work for TBN.

-- Ed, Friday, June 8, 2007 4:28 PM (5 minutes ago) Bookmark Link

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Only technical stuff for some of their TV channels, the company i work for sold them some stuff.

http://raycomfortfood.blogspot.com/2008/05/heres-dirt.html

fuck this idiot

those that fail to give the name “God” or “Jesus” capitals, will be automatically deleted

Aside from the god* bollocks, he actually makes a reasonable point in that post.

*note lower case g.

dunno if anyone has mentioned this yet, but wild bananas that haven't been cultivated by people are all fat and lumpy looking. so the bananas you buy at the shop ARE designed!

Aside from the god* bollocks, he actually makes a reasonable point in that post.

*note lower case g.

-- chap, Friday, May 30, 2008 12:11 PM (10 minutes ago) Bookmark Link

and that point is? NASA's half a percent of the federal budget is a waste of money because we already know that god made mars from dirt? never mind that phoenix is there to learn if there's water & if we can establish colonies on mars, not to learn 'what mars is made of'

I'm not against space exploration per se, and I get as excited as anyone when new space pictures and info comes in. And yeah, there are much bigger wastes of money going on all the time. But I can see where the guy's coming from - if you're going to call him out on something, he's said way more ludicrous stuff.

what did he say that you agreed with?

That maybe we should put more time and effort into sorting out our own shit before looking outwards. I'm not saying I agree with him 100%, but, like I say, it's not an unreasonable point.

He show gets a lot of action on his blog.

What amazes me about the atheist is that most of them are into science fiction. They watch Star Trek, Star Wars ( C3PO ), and others which promote superior intelligent design among the stars.

Promote?

I think he's confusing 'most atheists' with 'most athetists who are into wasting time posting crap on internet message boards'.

this will give us pretty good scientific insight into "our own shit"

kinda reminds me of this: