WORLD CUP DOOM: Make pessimistic predictions in the hope that by making them, they won't then actually happen

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Never believed in the "don't tempt fate" line myself. Whenever I make a quite specific prediction, it never happens.

So:

1. Owen will get sent off for diving.

― Alba (Alba), Monday, 5 June 2006 11:43 (nineteen years ago)

2. Totti will be banned for spitting.

― Crimea River (Mark C), Monday, 5 June 2006 11:46 (nineteen years ago)

England will not win the world cup

― Dave B (daveb), Monday, 5 June 2006 11:46 (nineteen years ago)

3. England winning.

Hah I beat you dadaismus!

― Brigadier Lethbridge-Pfunkboy (Kerr), Monday, 5 June 2006 11:47 (nineteen years ago)

4. England win the world cup. (runs away)

― mark grout (mark grout), Monday, 5 June 2006 11:47 (nineteen years ago)

5. Beer in stadiums will be as bad an idea in practice as it sounds in theory.

(astonishingly, I knew 3/4 was coming)

― Alba (Alba), Monday, 5 June 2006 11:50 (nineteen years ago)

6. Lippi decides that Toni and Gilardino don't have enough "big tournament experience", and instead plays a frontline of Inzaghi and Del Piero.

― Dom Passantino (Dom Passantino), Monday, 5 June 2006 11:52 (nineteen years ago)

Oh god Dom it couldn't happen, really, could it? *shoots self*

― Crimea River (Mark C), Monday, 5 June 2006 11:55 (nineteen years ago)

England makes it through the first round.

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Monday, 5 June 2006 11:56 (nineteen years ago)

are people missing the point to this question? or do a lot of ilxors hate england?

8. the usual barny of going out on penalties in the second round - losing to Germany.

― Ste (Fuzzy), Monday, 5 June 2006 12:02 (nineteen years ago)

9. Kenwyne Jones spends the entire tournament on the bench.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Monday, 5 June 2006 12:06 (nineteen years ago)

10. Losing our first game, i think this could be the most depressing thing ever.

― Ste (Fuzzy), Monday, 5 June 2006 12:08 (nineteen years ago)

Predictable of course but the absolute worst thing for me would be England losing to Germany in the second round on penalties. Worse than going out to Poland, Argentina, Brazil etc.

― Konal Doddz (blueski), Monday, 5 June 2006 12:11 (nineteen years ago)

are people missing the point to this question? or do a lot of ilxors hate england?

A "lot" of Ilxors are fucking Guineas.

― Dom Passantino (Dom Passantino), Monday, 5 June 2006 12:16 (nineteen years ago)

Chance'd be a fine thing.

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Monday, 5 June 2006 12:18 (nineteen years ago)

Peter Crouch breaks his meta-tarsal doing the robot dance.

― Ronan (Ronan), Monday, 5 June 2006 12:26 (nineteen years ago)

Mentions of 1966.

― Brigadier Lethbridge-Pfunkboy (Kerr), Monday, 5 June 2006 12:28 (nineteen years ago)

There's a lot of people who really don't want England to win. Or 'celts' as they are sometimes known.

― Dave B (daveb), Monday, 5 June 2006 12:30 (nineteen years ago)

Dom's slash-fic prediction for the U.S. from the other thread will be OTM.

― Haikunym (Haikunym), Monday, 5 June 2006 12:47 (nineteen years ago)

Ukraine play at the top of their game and beat Spain...
And then go on to lose to Tunisia and Saudi Arabia.

― pleased to mitya (mitya), Monday, 5 June 2006 15:09 (nineteen years ago)

Germany qualify second from their group, so England and Sweden play a farce of a match, each trying to lose to avoid the hosts in the last 16. FIFA chucks both teams out, Paraguay and T&T go thru, riots on the streets, etc, etc.

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Monday, 5 June 2006 15:28 (nineteen years ago)

The entire ~~National~~ english media is unbearable.

― Brigadier Lethbridge-Pfunkboy (Kerr), Monday, 5 June 2006 15:43 (nineteen years ago)

There's a lot of people who really don't want England to win. Or 'celts' as they are sometimes known.

See also Americans, Italians, Spaniards etc. Difficult a concept as it is for some to visualise, some other countries that aren't England are (1) represented on ILX and (2) playing in the World Cup.

My predictions: Henrik Larsson will be rubbish, completely fail to find the form that turned around the Champions League final and will move back home to Sweden in the summer a complete and utter abject failure and a figure of public ridicule. Majiec Zurawski won't score at all for Poland, and Artur Boruc will let in about 20 at the other end. Oh, yeah, and England will actually win a penalty shootout.

― ailsa (ailsa), Monday, 5 June 2006 15:54 (nineteen years ago)

Murphy's Law is recursive. Washing your car to make it rain doesn't make it work.

― Courtney Gidts (ex machina), Monday, 5 June 2006 16:00 (nineteen years ago)

It's only a bit of fun, jon.

― Alba (Alba), Monday, 5 June 2006 16:26 (nineteen years ago)

Another Brazil v. Germany final.

― M. White (Miguelito), Monday, 5 June 2006 16:55 (nineteen years ago)

The world cup will last forever.

― DV (dirtyvicar), Monday, 5 June 2006 17:33 (nineteen years ago)

England will win the world cup

― DV (dirtyvicar), Monday, 5 June 2006 17:36 (nineteen years ago)

Holland will fukk upp again...

― tiit (tiit), Monday, 5 June 2006 18:22 (nineteen years ago)

Big Brother and the World Cup will somehow merge into each other.

― DV (dirtyvicar), Monday, 5 June 2006 18:31 (nineteen years ago)

...into the Big Brother World Cup?
(o the abhorrorverse)

― tiit (tiit), Monday, 5 June 2006 18:34 (nineteen years ago)

Too late:
http://www.mobilemag.com/content/100/104/C8117/

― schwantz (schwantz), Monday, 5 June 2006 22:17 (nineteen years ago)

Nazis take over.
I start cheering on England's every opponent, just because. Riquelme does what I suspect he might do.
Zidane dies of a heart attack in the first game.

― Ally C (Ally C), Monday, 5 June 2006 22:36 (nineteen years ago)

Well, not the FIRST game, obviously. Although that would be terrible, too.

― Ally C (Ally C), Monday, 5 June 2006 22:37 (nineteen years ago)

ian wright remains a regular pundit on the beeb for the duration of the tournament.

― weasel diesel (K1l14n), Monday, 5 June 2006 22:41 (nineteen years ago)

Scotland win the World Cup.

Oh, hang on...

Brazil win the World Cup (that's better).

― David Orton (scarlet), Monday, 5 June 2006 22:55 (nineteen years ago)

them Germ''s, them be winnin' & winnin' & winnin'

― tiit (tiit), Tuesday, 6 June 2006 09:53 (nineteen years ago)

Re: 1. You can't be sent off just for diving. It's a caution for unsporting behaviour (simulation). It's a red card for spitting though.

― caek (caek), Tuesday, 6 June 2006 10:25 (nineteen years ago)

I was thinking of it being a "second bookable offence". Two dives in quick succession, perhaps.

― Alba (Alba), Tuesday, 6 June 2006 11:10 (nineteen years ago)

http://www.picturetrunk.com/uploads/1cfe5fc67d.jpg

they will act like they were on holiday, and drink, and sex it up, and be too tired to even make it out of their group

― nicky lo-fi (nicky lo-fi), Tuesday, 6 June 2006 23:57 (nineteen years ago)

ACTUALLY - I have started hoping that England win, because it will annoy all the football fans here.

― DV (dirtyvicar), Wednesday, 7 June 2006 12:22 (nineteen years ago)

OH YEAH POOR ENGLAND NATL TEAM, SO PERSECUTED ON ILX, HI DERE

― Haikunym (Haikunym), Wednesday, 7 June 2006 12:27 (nineteen years ago)

I think he meant here in the 'actually here' sense rather than the ILX sense.

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Wednesday, 7 June 2006 12:31 (nineteen years ago)

OKAY THEN SORRY FOR BEING ANOTHER AMERICAN JERKOFF

― Haikunym (Haikunym), Wednesday, 7 June 2006 13:42 (nineteen years ago)

englaterra will also fukk upp again

― tiit (tiit), Wednesday, 7 June 2006 13:55 (nineteen years ago)

I think he meant here in the 'actually here' sense rather than the ILX sense.

SRIGHT. In the non-virtual physical locality in which I spend much of my time.

― DV (dirtyvicar), Wednesday, 7 June 2006 14:09 (nineteen years ago)

Harry Kewell and Tim Cahill will both limp off in separate, innocuous incidents within half an hour of kick-off in game 1 not to be seen again.

― Fred Nerk (Fred Nerk), Thursday, 8 June 2006 01:45 (nineteen years ago)

Harry Kewell leaving the pitch with an ill-defined injury within 30 minutes of a major match kicking off? What kinda crazy talk is that?

― Dom Passantino (Dom Passantino), Thursday, 8 June 2006 01:48 (nineteen years ago)

"Peter Crouch breaks his meta-tarsal doing the robot dance."

Some kind of grief happening to PC preventing him from wasting space on the pitch would improve England's chances, surely?

― Fred Nerk (Fred Nerk), Thursday, 8 June 2006 03:04 (nineteen years ago)

Iran Vs. Angola is the game of the tournament.

― MitchellStirling (MitchellStirling), Thursday, 8 June 2006 07:15 (nineteen years ago)

Someone stamps on Rooney's foot.

― Alba (Alba), Thursday, 8 June 2006 08:14 (nineteen years ago)

two weeks pass...

Ecuador becomes a byword for English failure at football.

― Alba (Alba), Sunday, 25 June 2006 12:30 (nineteen years ago)

Scarily enough, most of my predictions actually did come true. Bah.

― ailsa (ailsa), Sunday, 25 June 2006 12:36 (nineteen years ago)

1. Owen will get sent off for diving.

Oh, the ironing.

― Half loaf, half pompadour (noodle vague), Sunday, 25 June 2006 12:38 (nineteen years ago)

Michael Carrick gets mugged for Ecuador's winner.

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Sunday, 25 June 2006 13:06 (nineteen years ago)

EVERYONE WILL BE KILLED!

http://blog.wfmu.org/freeform/2006/06/world_cup_death_3.html

― Dr Morbius (Dr Morbius), Monday, 26 June 2006 19:42 (nineteen years ago)

England 0 Portugal 1 (Ronaldo '20)

― Konal Doddz (blueski), Tuesday, 27 June 2006 22:12 (nineteen years ago)

England will play really well and lose.

― Alba (Alba), Tuesday, 27 June 2006 22:15 (nineteen years ago)

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