How camp is your MP3 player?

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Here's what you do... put the player on random and rate the first 20 songs that come up out of 10 for campness. With explanations if you like. No cheating. Winner gets the title of "Campest ILXOR" and an aura of unassailable smugness.

1. Dario G - Carnival de Paris - err...can I cheat? I'm almost ashamed to admit this one. I put it on because I was going to Paris and it seemed appropriate. Camp? Its quite flouncy, I guess. 6 camp points

2. The Field Mice - Let's Kiss and Make Up. Well, nice and bouncy but only camp? Feyness only counts a certain amount 5 camp points

3. Royksopp - 49 per cent. I thought of this idea because yesterday it all seemed to be Sister Sledge and Donna Summer. This is the techno version, though, so 5 camp points

4.John Holt - The Tide Is High. Debbie Harry saw fit to cover it, so that gets some points I suppose 2 points

5.Aislers Set - Not too young to get married. Hmmm.. 5 points

6. Freda Payne - Band Of Gold Now this is more like it 9 points

7. Mogollar - Eastern Love. I got this off Slsk, from a CD called Turkish Delights. It deserves points just for that. 5 points

8.Jens Lenkman - the opposite of Hallelujah. I thought I'd taken this off actually...err.. 6 points

9. Air -Sexy boy Oh yeah. 9 points

10. Ann Peebles - I can't stand the rain. Ranting soul GODDESS talks to pillows, windows. Claustrophobic marvellousness. 8 points

Actually, I'm only going to do 10, in case this falls to the bottom of new answers and vanishes. Do 20 if you can be arsed. Or don't.

― hobart paving (hobart paving), Friday, 9 June 2006 17:22 (nineteen years ago)

Blimey, that punctuation is poor.

― hobart paving (hobart paving), Friday, 9 June 2006 17:24 (nineteen years ago)

1. Juliana Hatfield, "Bad Day" - I've never actually heard this before, I never make it that far on Bed. Not overly dramatic, pretty rocking: 1 point

2. Green Day, "Tight Wad Hill" - he does wear a bit of eyeliner? 3 points

3. The Velvet Underground, "Femme Fatale" - Warhol, Nico, chambery 7 points

4. Modern Lovers, "Pablo Picasso" - Pablo was way too macho to be camp. 1 point

5. Bruce Springsteen, "Thunder Road" - denim jackets, tinkling pianos, 3 points

6. Raveonettes, "Heartbreak Stroll" - one of their noisier songs, but the Buddy Holly/surf fetish earns a few, 3 points

7. The Streets, "Could Well Be In" - 2 points for singing the hook

8. Black Rebel Motorcycle Club, "Red Eyes & Tears" - is it camp to shamelessly rip off JAMC? kinda gothy, so it gets some - 5 points

9. The Kiss-Offs, "The Kiss That Kills" - jokey Austin garage band, all about smell the glove and leather pants - 5 points

10. Geto Boys, "Geto Fantasy" - lines about buying mama a house - 1 point

11. Elvis Costello, "Sneaky Feelings" - not one of the stronger early outings - 4 points

12. Joy Division, "Transmission" (live, Preston) - too hectic to be camp - 0 points

13. Minor Threat, "No Reason" - straight-edge was so over the top - 4 points

14. Nouvelle Vague, "Friday Night, Saturday Morning" - French lounge covers? 9 points

15. Eartha Kitt, "Santa Baby" - this one not so campy, maybe, but every high school talent show performance of it = mega-camp. 8 points

16. The Smiths, "I Know It's Over" - I don't even know why this is on here, I hate the Smiths. 7 points

17. Black Flag, "Room 13" - not one of the better Damaged tracks. Gets camp points for Henry Rollins - 4 points

18. Uncle Tupelo, "No Depression" - middle-class modern Americans posing as dirt-farming gospel group? 6 points

19. Missy Elliott, "Hit 'Em Wit Da Hee" - nothing to say, 6 points

20. The Coup, "Lazy Muthafucka" - The Revolution Will Not Be Camp, 0 points

― milo z (mlp), Friday, 9 June 2006 17:47 (nineteen years ago)

I think I over-rated jens lenkman.

― hobart paving (hobart paving), Friday, 9 June 2006 18:16 (nineteen years ago)

1. The Root, D'Angelo (2)
2. Fire, Rebirth Br4ss B4nd (0)
3. Joe Camel, New B1rth Brass Band (3)
4. Goodies (Richard X Remix) (2)
5. Like I Love You, Justin Timberlake (8)
6. With Teeth, Nine Inch Nails (8)
7. Don't Move, Keith Hudson (2)
8. Weed Drought, St00ges Brass Band (1)
9. We Rock the Party, S0ul Rebels (1)
10. Slow, Kylie Minogue (7)

― Jordan (Jordan), Friday, 9 June 2006 18:26 (nineteen years ago)

Stooges - 1969 (4) rawk, barely glam
Broadcast - Evil Is Coming (5) techy chick
Kraftwerk - Planet of Visions (5) techy dudes
Boredoms - Jungle Tatei (3) noise creds
Gist - Embrace the Herd (6) tweeness
Faust - Unititled (2) dirty hippies
The Fall - Container Drivers (1) Mark E Smithness
Bo Diddley - Down Home Special (6) The 1950s
Parliament - Funkentelechy (4) bell bottoms?
Chuck Berry - My Ding a Ling (6) about cock

― Washable School Paste (sexyDancer), Friday, 9 June 2006 19:11 (nineteen years ago)

1. Zuleika Dobson (10)
2. Tiffany lamps (10)
3. Scopitone films (10)
4. The Brown Derby restaurant on Sunset Boulevard in LA (8)
5. The Enquirer, headlines and stories (9)
6. Aubrey Beardsley drawings (10)
7. Swan Lake (10)
8. Bellini's operas (10)
9. Visconti's direction of Salome and 'Tis Pity She's a Whore (10)
10. certain turn-of-the-century picture postcards (4)
11. Schoedsack's King Kong (7)
12. the Cuban pop singer La Lupe (10)
13. Lynn Ward's novel in woodcuts, God's Man (6)
14. the old Flash Gordon comics (5)
15. women's clothes of the twenties (feather boas, fringed and beaded dresses, etc.) (8)
16. the novels of Ronald Firbank and Ivy Compton-Burnett (9)
17. stag movies seen without lust (3)

― nabisco (nabisco), Friday, 9 June 2006 20:03 (nineteen years ago)

jordan why did you googleproof those band names?

― s1ocki (slutsky), Friday, 9 June 2006 20:05 (nineteen years ago)

Because they're all dudes I know, and I'd rather not have them read me rating their level of camp.

― Jordan (Jordan), Friday, 9 June 2006 20:10 (nineteen years ago)

In what universe is Ciara less campy than Nine Inch Nails? ESPECIALLY that Richard X remix? (That is the one with MIA on it, yes? If not, then okay I kind of see where you were going.)

― Dan (Not That "With Teeth" Deserves Less Than 8) Perry (Dan Perry), Friday, 9 June 2006 20:19 (nineteen years ago)

1. Bauhaus - "The Passion of Lovers" (8 artsy goth/glam, passion, lovers, melodrama)
2. Culture Club - "Karma Chameleon" (10 - I hit camp gold!)
3. Lycia - "The Last Winter" (3 a few points for goth & a bit cheeky but I wouldn't call them camp, especially this album)
4. Bauhaus - "Muscle in Plastic" (6, more Bauhaus but not as much melodrama)
5. Aphex Twin - "Girl/Boy Song" (5 campy for an IDM track. also it has bells, strings, cute dinky synth noises. +1 twee point since he wrote it for his girlfriend.)
6. Kraftwerk - "Trans Europe Express" (5 for talking about Europe (esp. Paris))
7. The Smiths - "This Charming Man" (10 see: every single lyric in this song)
8. Echo & the Bunnymen - "The Cutter" (6 angsty '80s Brit boys)
9. Depeche Mode - "World in My Eyes" (7, which is 1.75 points for each member of Depeche Mode. It adds up.)
10. Nick Drake - "River Man" (3 Dreamy English schoolboy who influenced Belle & Sebastian. Something from Bryter Layter would have been more campy, but "River Man" not so much.)
11. Dead or Alive - "Lover Come Back to Me" (10. And if I could give myself 11 I would.)
12. The Chameleons - "Pleasure and Pain" (2. angsty '80s Brit boys, but -4 pts for anti-fashion.)
13. Carl Orff - "O Fortuna" (1 campy when used in proper context but not so much on its own)
14. Yasunori Mitsuda - "The Day the World Revived" (5 for: http://www.rpgplanet.com/chrono/images/ct_Flea.gif)
15. Tears for Fears - "Shout [U.S. Bonus Beats Remix]" (7. TFF were ugly, but in an endearing campy way. And bonus beats are always camp.)
16. Frankie Goes to Hollywood - "Two Tribes" (10 :D)
17. Tones on Tail - "Christian Says" (4 goth but in a not-so-campy way kinda)
18. Kraftwerk - "Computer Love" (7. awwww.)
19. Electronic - "Try All You Want" (7 Johnny Marr + Barney Sumner make dance music)
20. Depeche Mode - "The Meaning of Love" (8 another cute synth pop song)

8 + 10 + 3 + 6 + 5 + 5 + 10 + 6 + 7 + 3 + 10 + 2 + 1 + 5 + 7 + 10 + 4 + 7 + 7 + 8 = 124 pts total

― Curt1s St3ph3ns, Friday, 9 June 2006 20:52 (nineteen years ago)

1. Electric Six - Pleasing Interlude No.2 Jesus, like a 9. You couldn't be camper without actually being gay.
2. UMASS Front Percussion Ensemble - Paranoid Android Um, maybe a 6 for kitchiness?
3. bernard hermann - nocturne Melodramatic theme to a Hitchcock film? Better believe that's an 8.
4. Fiery Furnaces - Guns Under the Counter 4?
5. Hem - Stupid Mouth Shut 2 for the hostility.
6. Diplo - Gold Digger remix 4, it is sort of a dance song.

Oops, gotta go drink.

― Eppy (Eppy), Friday, 9 June 2006 20:56 (nineteen years ago)

In what universe is Ciara less campy than Nine Inch Nails? ESPECIALLY that Richard X remix? (That is the one with MIA on it, yes? If not, then okay I kind of see where you were going.)

With Teeth is campy as fuck. I probably would have rated the Ciara original higher, but the remix (which is basically an M.I.A. track) is more hipstery than campy.

― Jordan (Jordan), Friday, 9 June 2006 21:01 (nineteen years ago)

1) Placebo - Meat Beat Manifesto (7)
2) Summertime - The Fake Fictions (6)
3) You Just Can't Win - Them (2)
4) The Log Train - Hank Williams (0)
5) Destroyer - European Oils (8)
6) Gary Numan - Conversation (7)
7) Kaskade - This Rhythm (9)
8) Say It (Overand Over Again) - John Coltrane (0)
9) You're Looking At Me - Nat King Cole Trio (4)
10) Nirvana - About a Girl (4)

― sinful caesar sipped his snifter (kenan), Friday, 9 June 2006 21:31 (nineteen years ago)

11) The Black Keys Work - Erlend Oye/Phonique (9)
12) Fifty-Fifty Clown - Cocteau Twins (7)
13) Blues in Bob Minor - Robert Wyatt (5?)
14) The Big Chair - Tears for Fears (8)
15) Mother Whale Eyeless - Brian Eno (6)
16) Harmonique - John Coltrane (0)
17) Howlin' a Gale - Howe Gelb (4)
18) Death at One's Elbow - The Smiths (9)
19) I Could Never Take the Place Of Your Man - Prince (7)
20) Damaged I - Black Flag (0)

― sinful caesar sipped his snifter (kenan), Friday, 9 June 2006 21:39 (nineteen years ago)

I was thinking this would be about flaming pink iPods or the like.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 9 June 2006 21:44 (nineteen years ago)

May as well do 11-20

11. Esther Williams - Last Night Changed It All - Song about going out, dancing and discovering yerself. And talky bits 8

12. The Chiffons - I have a Boyfriend. Nowhere near as camp as the Ronettes, but not exactly macho. 7

13. The Jacksons - Can you feel it... It looks like I'm fixing this 9

14. Scissor Sisters - Take Your Mama - honestly, I'm not. This has to be 10 doesn't it?

15. errr.. John Holt - The tide is high, again...
15. Ann Peebles again
15. Outkast - Hey Ya 5

16. The fieldmice god, this thing isn't very random. Oh, that's better Ivor Cutler - Yellow Fly... errr.. 3

17. Esther Williams -You Gotta let Me Show You 4 I think that's undervaluing it a bit

18. The Jacksons - I Want You Back 8

19. Camera Obscura - I Love My Jean. foppish 4

20. Sarah Mclachlan - Sweet Surrender. File under "guilty pleasures". Its the Tiesto mix 6

― hobart paving (hobart paving), Friday, 9 June 2006 21:52 (nineteen years ago)

1 Rolling Stones - Red Rooster 0 *
2 Stina Nordenstam - When Debbie's Back From Texas. 3
3 Teh Knife Band - From Off To On 4
4 Portishead - Biscuit 0 *
5 Boo Radleys - I've Lost The Reason 1
6 Helen Love - Debbie's Joey 5
7 Pet Shop Boys - Indefinite Leave to Remain 8
8 Second Phase - MEntasm 2
9 MBV - Soon 0
10 PSBs - To Speak is a sin 8
11 Enrique Iglesias ft KElis - Not in Love 4 *
12 Beastie Boys - Get It Together 3
13 Wannadies - Hit 2
14 Art of Noise - Crusoe (some weird mix) 0 *
15 Georgie Fame - The Ballad Of Bonnie & Clyde 8 *
16 Eminem - The Way I Am 6
17 Army of Lovers - The Particle Song 10
18 Beach Boys - Let's Go Away For A While 3 *
19 Bollywood Brass Band - Gur Nalon Ishk Mitha 5 *
20 Emma Bunton - Lay Your Love On Me 4

total: 80

* are songs i haven't consciously remembered listening to on iTunes (or even adding to the library). also if weighted to songs i actually listen to it (ie the PSBs) it would be even higher, and those are some of the least camp PSB songs i reckon

― Britain's Obtusest Shepherd (Alan), Friday, 9 June 2006 22:10 (nineteen years ago)

76. i can't add up fo shit, eh?

― Britain's Obtusest Shepherd (Alan), Friday, 9 June 2006 22:12 (nineteen years ago)

I think I'm at 102, but this self-rating system is real sketchy.

― sinful caesar sipped his snifter (kenan), Friday, 9 June 2006 22:27 (nineteen years ago)

1. Anarchy in the UK - Sex Pistols. Any camp points at all? 1 for the look maybe.
2. And the Band Played Waltzing Matilda - The Pogues. Dear me, so uncamp. 0.
3. Return to Hot Chicken - Yo La Tengo. Excellent but pretty much camp-free indie pop. 1.
4. Streets of London - Ralph McTell. Oh gawd. 0.
5. Lookaround - Dressy Bessy - now this has some potential. 5.
6. Wednesday Morning 3am - Simon and Garfunkel. Meh. 1?
7. Pick me up and put me in your pocket - Patti Bravo. Not a clue how camp Motown is. Not very in this case - 3.
8. Cantaloupe Island - The Third Wave - now Philipino siblings in mini-dresses - yeah, campness. 8.
9. Lo Boob Oscillator - Stereolab. 2 points for the word "boob".
10. Geno - Dexy's Midnight Runners. Um, no. 0.

Pathetic.

― Crimea River (Mark C), Friday, 9 June 2006 22:36 (nineteen years ago)

1. Seize The Rainbow - Sonny Sharrock Band (2; Sharrock would normally be 0 on the camp scale, but this album is a little too slick)
2. Suegliatti & Uccidi - John Zorn (1)
3. Virtually Part 1 - Soft Machine (4)
4. Mere Pseud Mag. Ed. - The Fall (0)
5. I'm In The Mood To Move - Ween (0)
6. Sweet Jane - The Velvet Underground (5)
7. The Sinker Ball - Kramer (0)
8. Kick the Can - The Fall (0)
9. Zen - John Cale (5)
10. Maggot Death - Brighton - Throbbing Gristle (6; averaging a 0 for the music and a 10 for G.P.-O.)
11. All I Need - Air (10; off the scale, actually)
12. Ëmëhntëht-Rë (Extrait n° Deux) - Magma (3)
13. Peace - Ornette Coleman (0)
14. Like It Feels - Henry Threadgill (0)
15. Barnyard - Brian Wilson (8)
16. Death Kit Train - Cul de Sac (0)
17. Concrete Jungle - The Specials (7)
18. The Big Lounge Scene - Minutemen (0)
19. Death Of The Clayton Peacock - Fruit Bats (2)
20. Envoy - Mike Pathos (9)

Total 62

― The Jazz Guide to Penguins on Compact Disc (Rock Hardy), Friday, 9 June 2006 22:48 (nineteen years ago)

I would give any Sex Pistols track a 9 for the McLaren/Westwood influence.

― The Jazz Guide to Penguins on Compact Disc (Rock Hardy), Friday, 9 June 2006 22:50 (nineteen years ago)

Dexy's Midnight Runners in "not camp" shocka??

― hobart paving (hobart paving), Friday, 9 June 2006 22:51 (nineteen years ago)

I'm gonna dock that Chameleons track down to 0 for me - looking back I can't think of any camp value it may hold. So 122 points now instead of 124.

― Curt1s St3ph3ns, Friday, 9 June 2006 22:55 (nineteen years ago)

Yeah, I think the Robert Wyatt track gets a 2 or a 3. He is doing a Dylan imression, which is a bit camp, but he's not kidding and not bad at it.

― sinful caesar sipped his snifter (kenan), Friday, 9 June 2006 22:59 (nineteen years ago)

1. Edith Frost - Easy to Love (this isn't her best, but I guess it has a little camp, 2)
2. REM - Fretless (pretty mopey, lyrics suggest oral sex, but really depressing oral sex, 3)
3. Homosexuals - Neutron Lover (NEUTRON! LOVAH!, 9)
4. Clipse - Ego (the "semi-automatic has been known to jam" bit is kinda campy, 4)
5. Rachid Taha - Ho Cherie Cherie (not really at all, 0)
6. Mekons - Sleepless Nights (2)
7. Sadies - Pretty Polly (3)
8. The Fall - Garden (while it is the best song ever, there is very little camp in it. Maybe others could find some. 0.)
9. McLusky - The World Loves Us And Is Our Bitch (hmm, 6)
10. Soft Machine - Hulloder (3)

― clotpoll (Clotpoll), Friday, 9 June 2006 23:02 (nineteen years ago)

xpost - that's the only Wyatt song I can say I hate.

― The Jazz Guide to Penguins on Compact Disc (Rock Hardy), Friday, 9 June 2006 23:05 (nineteen years ago)

Hmmm.

― sinful caesar sipped his snifter (kenan), Friday, 9 June 2006 23:10 (nineteen years ago)

Marc Aryan - Bête À Manger Du Foin
Brigitte Bardot - À la fin de l'été
Bill Boyce - Hooters Galore
The Temptations & Diana Ross & The Supremes -The Weight
The Smiths - Still Ill
INXS - Just Keep Walking
The Supremes - There's No Stopping Us Now
Robert Preston - Seventy-Six Trombones
The GoodfellasI - Soul Heaven - Dae Clarke Remix 4:46
Electric Six - Lost Control (Of My Rock & Roll)
Praline - C'est Comme'je Vous I'dis
All Saints - If You Want To Party (I Found Lovin')
Romeo & Juliet soundtrack - What is a Youth
Jackie DeShannon - Don't turn your back on me
Ingénues - L'amour C'est Un Jeu
Lyn & The Invaders - Boy Is Gone
Brigitte Bardot - Ne me laisse pas l'aimer
Pulp - I Spy
Pet Shop Boys - DJ Culture
Modern Romance - Band of Gold

oh gosh, I don't know

― tokyo nursery school: afternoon session (rosemary), Saturday, 10 June 2006 01:46 (nineteen years ago)

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