This is the thread where those of us who wish there was a Glastonbury this year can fantasise about what we'd be doing if it were on

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It's fucking hot on this coach and I've read the Guardian sports section four times. Still, only a couple of hours to that first sip of perry.

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Thursday, 22 June 2006 12:29 (nineteen years ago)

i'm driving on the motorway in my nissan micra and i just had a wank into a beercan at 80mph!

― teh_kit has 21 friends (g-kit), Thursday, 22 June 2006 12:35 (nineteen years ago)

"FOOLS!!! HA HA HA HA HA, IT LOOKS LIKE IT'S GOING TO RAIN!!!"

Actually, wait, is this reality or fantasy? Because really I'd like to be saying "Blimey, AMPy, the backstage here is NICE!!! Yana, stop hogging the outlet, I know you need to curl your hair but I've got to charge my laptop. Oooh, Anna, pass the pink wine!"

― How does a ferret get invisible, then? (kate), Thursday, 22 June 2006 12:35 (nineteen years ago)

anyone fancy a sip of my beer?

― teh_kit has 21 friends (g-kit), Thursday, 22 June 2006 12:36 (nineteen years ago)

Wow, the campsite is really full. I pity those people who only come down on the Thursdays.

― DV (dirtyvicar), Thursday, 22 June 2006 12:37 (nineteen years ago)

oh shit, yeah, i'm already here. i had that wank yesterday, then. beer offer still available, though (for a limited time).

― teh_kit has 21 friends (g-kit), Thursday, 22 June 2006 12:38 (nineteen years ago)

(haha, should have started a "this is the thread for those of us that didn't get tix for the secret glastonbury 2006 festival")

― Britain's Obtusest Shepherd (Alan), Thursday, 22 June 2006 12:39 (nineteen years ago)

i feel so fresh and so clean

― Britain's Obtusest Shepherd (Alan), Thursday, 22 June 2006 12:39 (nineteen years ago)

help us get these amp racks and cabs through this tunnel before security turns up.

― Ed (dali), Thursday, 22 June 2006 12:40 (nineteen years ago)

Omigod, our gigant0r tourbus is surrounded on all sounds by Secret Machines, Death From Above 1979, Tiga and errr... Take That! (Just to, you know, keep us all happy with the view.)

― How does a ferret get invisible, then? (kate), Thursday, 22 June 2006 12:41 (nineteen years ago)

Text from the Vicar says it's all rammed. New Bands field it is again then...

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Thursday, 22 June 2006 12:44 (nineteen years ago)

I win the putting up the tent race AGANE and now am itching to skip down the hill to the perry. Though this year I have turned over a new leaf and am going to be nice to Sarah and help her put her tent up.

― Pete (Pete), Thursday, 22 June 2006 12:44 (nineteen years ago)

i can see teh_Vicar! he's pretending he hasn't seen me though! omfg, he's running away! THIS MAKES ME SAD!
why have you forsaken me, vicar?

― teh_kit has 21 friends (g-kit), Thursday, 22 June 2006 12:46 (nineteen years ago)

Ha ha, when you all wave your hands like that, you look just like wheat!

― How does a ferret get invisible, then? (kate), Thursday, 22 June 2006 12:47 (nineteen years ago)

I knew it was a mistake to crack into my box of wine before putting my tent up. I don't know where this long bit goes and all the pegs are bent double from last year.

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Thursday, 22 June 2006 12:48 (nineteen years ago)

S'ok, Matt. We've got some extra backstage wristbands. You can sleep on the bus if you like. But you gotta bring the wine.

― How does a ferret get invisible, then? (kate), Thursday, 22 June 2006 12:51 (nineteen years ago)

Sorry, none of us can get on the bus! Emsk has fallen asleep on the steps!

― How does a ferret get invisible, then? (kate), Thursday, 22 June 2006 12:52 (nineteen years ago)

Backstage passes are for the pampered ponces. I'm camping out with the real people. Anyway, there's a scally with a machine knocking them out for a fiver each out in one of the car parks.

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Thursday, 22 June 2006 12:58 (nineteen years ago)

SOME HIPPY JUST TRIED TO SWAP HIS DOG FOR MY WEED, WTF.

― teh_kit has 21 friends (g-kit), Thursday, 22 June 2006 12:59 (nineteen years ago)

who's got magnus?

― Britain's Obtusest Shepherd (Alan), Thursday, 22 June 2006 13:07 (nineteen years ago)

I sold him for weed. And I don't even smoke.

― How does a ferret get invisible, then? (kate), Thursday, 22 June 2006 13:09 (nineteen years ago)

right then, LETS HAVE SOME PERRY!!!

― CarsmileSteve (CarsmileSteve), Thursday, 22 June 2006 15:05 (nineteen years ago)

(i might have to get a babycham on the way home or something actually. NEED PEARY GOODNESS!!!)

― CarsmileSteve (CarsmileSteve), Thursday, 22 June 2006 15:26 (nineteen years ago)

The queue for the Brothers Bar was so long I gave up on a pint and bought an entire two-litre bottle. Where are we meeting the mentalists?

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Thursday, 22 June 2006 15:27 (nineteen years ago)

oooooooooooooooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO000000000000000oooooooo

i think i've got a contact buzzzzzzz from spending too long on a dirrrty dronerock bus. what were those pills wot AMPy gave me?

who are you people? ooooooh, lookit the pretty lites. who wants to run off and look for leylines with these hippies wot i met drumming in mine head? who cares wot our stage time issss, time has nooooo meeeaaaaaaning...

::locks self in van and refuses to come out until the persons covered in mud leave mine head::

― How does a ferret get invisible, then? (kate), Thursday, 22 June 2006 15:37 (nineteen years ago)

It's okay, you're not on til Sunday.

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Thursday, 22 June 2006 15:46 (nineteen years ago)

WHO ARE YOU PEOPLE?!?!? I DON'T KNOW ANY OF YOU!!! GET OUT OF MINE HEAD!!!

DON'T COME NEAR THE VAN, I AM ARMED WITH A SPACE WUBBULATOR (made from several of my pedals wired together) AND I AM NOT AFRAID TO USE IT!!!! AAAAAAHHHHH MINE HEAD!¬!!!

― How does a ferret get invisible, then? (kate), Thursday, 22 June 2006 15:50 (nineteen years ago)

i can see teh_Vicar! he's pretending he hasn't seen me though! omfg, he's running away! THIS MAKES ME SAD!
why have you forsaken me, vicar?

OMG, there is some fucking weirdo following me, who in the name of christ is it? they look vaguely familiar.

OH LOOK AT THE TIME! Better head to the Brothers Bar to see Farrell roll around drunkenly.

― DV (dirtyvicar), Thursday, 22 June 2006 16:01 (nineteen years ago)

WHO ARE YOU PEOPLE?!?!? I DON'T KNOW ANY OF YOU!!! GET OUT OF MINE HEAD!!!

wrong festival dude. This is Glastonbury, not the Christmas ATP.

― DV (dirtyvicar), Thursday, 22 June 2006 16:05 (nineteen years ago)

I warned you not to come any closer!!!

http://www.shergold.co.uk/images/scans/jc_braindonor.jpg

― How does a ferret get invisible, then? (kate), Thursday, 22 June 2006 16:07 (nineteen years ago)

Yeah, I can foresee the "aargh, mine head" joke being used. A lot.

(xpost to DV)

― ailsa (ailsa), Thursday, 22 June 2006 16:08 (nineteen years ago)

My friends are bickering with each other!

― DV (dirtyvicar), Thursday, 22 June 2006 16:10 (nineteen years ago)

serves you right for hanging around with them lifestyle people ;)

― CarsmileSteve (CarsmileSteve), Thursday, 22 June 2006 18:24 (nineteen years ago)

I've just vomited on the Jazz World mixing desk and now I can't find my tent. It's just past those big stone things, isn't it?

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Thursday, 22 June 2006 20:59 (nineteen years ago)

Also the sent folder in my phone is full of texts to Emma containing lies about what her fiancee is doing while he's away. One of them simply read 'efoijwfeoijnsossidge'. The battery is now 3/4 gone.

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Thursday, 22 June 2006 21:00 (nineteen years ago)

Oh fuck, where's my tent?

― DV (dirtyvicar), Thursday, 22 June 2006 21:41 (nineteen years ago)

TARTIFLETTE

― Ronan (Ronan), Thursday, 22 June 2006 22:09 (nineteen years ago)

This isn't my tent. I'm pretty certain this is a field.

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Friday, 23 June 2006 06:31 (nineteen years ago)

Oh dear, those thunderclouds are looking awful ominous . . .

― Johnny B Was Quizzical (Johnney B), Friday, 23 June 2006 06:44 (nineteen years ago)

Oh god. My head. I smell strange. There's grass on my toothbrush. Tom, TOM, are you going to get some banana milk? Will you get me some strawberry milk? And a mars bar? No, ten mars bars. I'm going to get some tea. NEED TEA. Anyone, tea? Coffee for Carsmile, OK.

― Bhumibol Adulyadej (Lucretia My Reflection), Friday, 23 June 2006 08:19 (nineteen years ago)

going to wireless tonite :)))

― ken c (ken c), Friday, 23 June 2006 08:28 (nineteen years ago)

THIS YEAR SPONSORED BY BROTHERS!!!!!!

― ken c (ken c), Friday, 23 June 2006 08:30 (nineteen years ago)

oh shit wrong thread!!!

― ken c (ken c), Friday, 23 June 2006 08:30 (nineteen years ago)

erm.. back to contents. i'm whistling that carling football song along with loads of people

― ken c (ken c), Friday, 23 June 2006 08:31 (nineteen years ago)

Weather's not too bad. Tent did not turn into sauna too early. Now it's time for breakfast. Anyone for the Buddhafield place?

― DV (dirtyvicar), Friday, 23 June 2006 08:32 (nineteen years ago)

GAYBAR!

― DV (dirtyvicar), Friday, 23 June 2006 08:32 (nineteen years ago)

Uuurrrgggggghhhhh.

I woke up in a ditch, being gazed at by cows.

Where are my knickers?

The DDB just told me that the best cure for hangovers is mushrooms. Should I believe him? Oh well, here goes. Maybe I can fry them in an omelette for breakfast.

― How does a ferret get invisible, then? (kate), Friday, 23 June 2006 08:32 (nineteen years ago)

WINEBAR!

Bhuddafield too far, getting a breakfast bap. Hooray it's DEAD FISH!! Gotta catch 'em all gotta catch 'em all! See you next year on the Pyramid Stage!

― Bhumibol Adulyadej (Lucretia My Reflection), Friday, 23 June 2006 08:38 (nineteen years ago)

... where the hell did i get these knickers from?

― teh_kit has 21 friends (g-kit), Friday, 23 June 2006 08:39 (nineteen years ago)

ARGH WHAT IS THIS GODAWFUL INDIE SHIT THAT'S JUST WOKEN ME UP. I desperately need a bottle of water, where is it? Oh, here it is in a sock.

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Friday, 23 June 2006 08:42 (nineteen years ago)

Skipping 27 messages at this point... Click here if you want to load them all.

it might be the beer, but to whoever made this mix tape: THIS IS THE BEST MUSIC IN THE WORLD!!!!! OMG!!!1 eleven ect

― Britain's Obtusest Shepherd (Alan), Friday, 23 June 2006 13:50 (nineteen years ago)

ok, folk versions of 90s chart rave - this is a thread, right?

― Britain's Obtusest Shepherd (Alan), Friday, 23 June 2006 13:53 (nineteen years ago)

i think you should write it down on the back of a jaffa cakes box so we can start a thread when we get back.

― CarsmileSteve (CarsmileSteve), Friday, 23 June 2006 14:14 (nineteen years ago)

nobody @ Reading, then? SAD FACE.

― teh_kit has 21 friends (g-kit), Friday, 23 June 2006 14:16 (nineteen years ago)

NEDS ATOMIC DUSTBIN ARE CHI-CHI MEN

― A Certain Interweb Journalist (Lucretia My Reflection), Friday, 23 June 2006 14:17 (nineteen years ago)

LET'S MAKE FRIENDS WITH ALL THESE STRANGE PEOPLE!

HELLO MAN WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

― Britain's Obtusest Shepherd (Alan), Friday, 23 June 2006 14:18 (nineteen years ago)

Hey, have you heard? Bob Hoskins is dead.

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Friday, 23 June 2006 14:23 (nineteen years ago)

GOOD

― teh_kit has 21 friends (g-kit), Friday, 23 June 2006 14:23 (nineteen years ago)

i think you should write it down on the back of a jaffa cakes box so we can start a thread when we get back.

That's okay, Stevem can draw the internet on the back of the Q Daily. Or at least, he would if he wasn't sulking about not being able to find a tent showing Ukraine v Tunisia.

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Friday, 23 June 2006 14:26 (nineteen years ago)

i heard CLIFFS RICHARD was dead.

(reading smells, literally)

― CarsmileSteve (CarsmileSteve), Friday, 23 June 2006 14:27 (nineteen years ago)

Fall Out Boy win this year's 'accidentally booked way too far down the bill on the Other Stage' award. I'm trying to get from the dance tent to the Glade but there's 10,000 people in the way and I keep spilling my beer.

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Friday, 23 June 2006 14:54 (nineteen years ago)

There's a guy in the theatre field trying to park a car.

OMG THIS IS AMAZING.

― DV (dirtyvicar), Friday, 23 June 2006 15:51 (nineteen years ago)

OMG one of the fields has an actual robot v dinosaur fite! Someone text Mark S quick!

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Friday, 23 June 2006 15:55 (nineteen years ago)

I'm starting to feel a bit normal.

― DV (dirtyvicar), Friday, 23 June 2006 16:40 (nineteen years ago)

What's the weather actually like on site right now, just out of interest!

― Ronan (Ronan), Friday, 23 June 2006 16:49 (nineteen years ago)

IT'S STILL NOT RAINING!

Also, I can't believe that was the Chemical Brothers DJing in the dance tent AGAIN. They were AMAZING! Where's the Lock Tavern?

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Friday, 23 June 2006 22:39 (nineteen years ago)

Umm, also, where are all my friends? They were right behind me a second ago.

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Friday, 23 June 2006 22:41 (nineteen years ago)

FUCK, JUSTICE HEADLINING LOCK TAVERN.

Fuck this mdma is good, now time to go to the BRAIN MACHINE!

― Ronan (Ronan), Friday, 23 June 2006 22:41 (nineteen years ago)

ICE CREAM VAN PLAYING 'SWEET HARMONY!'

RAVE RAVE RAVE!

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Friday, 23 June 2006 22:43 (nineteen years ago)

apparently there is something good on in the john peel tent.

― DV (dirtyvicar), Friday, 23 June 2006 22:49 (nineteen years ago)

Last time I looked it was Pete Baran singing The Only Living Boy In New Cross. Very loudly indeed.

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Friday, 23 June 2006 22:50 (nineteen years ago)

Hi everyone, I'm at the Groovey Movie, drinking a lovely hot chocolate with brandy while watching film about skaters.

― DV (dirtyvicar), Friday, 23 June 2006 23:38 (nineteen years ago)

OOh, the Teepee field is very nice. Oh look here is a nice man selling chai.

― DV (dirtyvicar), Friday, 23 June 2006 23:46 (nineteen years ago)

Back in my tent now, very puppy tired. I hope the banging techno from the other side of the field doesn't stop me from ZZZZZ ZZZZZZ ZZZZZZ

― DV (dirtyvicar), Friday, 23 June 2006 23:55 (nineteen years ago)

I appear to be dancing with a tranny on a cocktail bar. I'm sure this happened last year.

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Saturday, 24 June 2006 00:01 (nineteen years ago)

I need truffles.

― DV (dirtyvicar), Saturday, 24 June 2006 07:20 (nineteen years ago)

I'm relaxing up in the vicinity of the stone circle. Maybe I could take up poi. Or get myself a bongo drum! That would be a great idea.

― DV (dirtyvicar), Saturday, 24 June 2006 10:30 (nineteen years ago)

Jesus guys... did anyone see those elves wandering around earlier?

― DV (dirtyvicar), Saturday, 24 June 2006 19:12 (nineteen years ago)

I love the way my brain feels the morning after taking loads of drugs.

Somone bring me tea!

― Johnny B Was Quizzical (Johnney B), Sunday, 25 June 2006 07:37 (nineteen years ago)

JAYZUZ, OI CAN SEE THROUGH TOIME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

― CarsmileSteve (CarsmileSteve), Sunday, 25 June 2006 08:12 (nineteen years ago)

Talking of which, when are Hawkwind on?

― DV (dirtyvicar), Sunday, 25 June 2006 09:50 (nineteen years ago)

Ugh. So tired. Need coffee + vodka to sort me out. Or I might curl up and sleep in the sunshine.

I made it back at 8.30 this morning. That Motown rave tent at 6am was amazing.

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Sunday, 25 June 2006 10:54 (nineteen years ago)

Jesus Christ, these Moonburgers with hummus are the nicest thing in the world ever.

― DV (dirtyvicar), Sunday, 25 June 2006 12:05 (nineteen years ago)

These headliners are rubbish. I'm off to find some chai and cake.

― DV (dirtyvicar), Sunday, 25 June 2006 21:24 (nineteen years ago)

The screen in the cinema field fucked up and we missed the whole first half of the England match. Did we miss much?

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Sunday, 25 June 2006 21:37 (nineteen years ago)

Also, RickyT's tape player is out, and so is Tom's Glasto tape. And so is the entire box of wine I have yet to open.

Hooray! It's Billie! BECAUSE WE WANT TO! BECAUSE WE WANT TO!

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Sunday, 25 June 2006 21:38 (nineteen years ago)

HEYYYY MR TAMBOURINE MAN PLAY A SONG FOR ME! BOSH BOSH BOSH BOSH BOSH SNARE ROLL BOSH!

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Sunday, 25 June 2006 21:50 (nineteen years ago)

'I Like To Move It Move It' in German. Tom, you are a very bad man.

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Sunday, 25 June 2006 21:57 (nineteen years ago)

Christ, I hope I find Farrell in the bus queue or I'll be here forever.

― DV (dirtyvicar), Monday, 26 June 2006 08:54 (nineteen years ago)

Were we OK? I have no memory of the entire weekend. Also, there's this weird hippie boy following me around claiming we got married in a Wiccan ceremony.

What happenned?

― Custard Subsidence (kate), Monday, 26 June 2006 09:12 (nineteen years ago)

wow where did everybody go?

― Ste (Fuzzy), Monday, 26 June 2006 09:21 (nineteen years ago)

having a poo at an M3 service station just now

― ken c (ken c), Monday, 26 June 2006 10:03 (nineteen years ago)

it's soooo clean.

― ken c (ken c), Monday, 26 June 2006 10:03 (nineteen years ago)

I'm still in the bus queue after oversleeping and having to put my tent away in the pissing rain. Fuck this corporate shit. I'm going to quit my job and go and live in a teepee somewhere outside Shepton Mallett. Well, maybe.

I can't wait to get home and read the thread all about this!

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Monday, 26 June 2006 10:12 (nineteen years ago)

I'm never getting out of here.

― DV (dirtyvicar), Monday, 26 June 2006 10:23 (nineteen years ago)

I hope I get to Bristol in time to see Henman thrown out of Wimbledon.

― DV (dirtyvicar), Monday, 26 June 2006 10:46 (nineteen years ago)

I am disgusted by all of you.

― Konal Doddz (blueski), Monday, 26 June 2006 14:08 (nineteen years ago)

Well, I have at least had a shower by now, in the Bristol B&B I always stay in. And now I am quaffing hearty ales in the Clifton pub with the nice dog after eating a tasty curry. I think I will crash soon, and then Glastonbury 2006 will be OVER.

― DV (dirtyvicar), Monday, 26 June 2006 20:49 (nineteen years ago)

Wasn't as good as the 2001 Glastonbury.

― Pete (Pete), Monday, 26 June 2006 21:02 (nineteen years ago)

there should've been a 'this is the thread where those of us who would be going to Glastonbury fantasise about the agony and ectasy of the online ticket purchasing endeavour were there one'.

― Konal Doddz (blueski), Monday, 26 June 2006 21:36 (nineteen years ago)

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