Buying and sharing scones with clotted cream and strawberry jam is the easiest way to ingratiate yourself among workmates

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We've all just pigged out and I am now held up as some kind of god for bringing in the tastiest thing ever. WHy do I not eat cream teas more? They're amazing!

I can also feel my arteries closing up after throwing clotted cream at them for the last hour . . .

― Johnny B Was Quizzical (Johnney B), Friday, 4 August 2006 12:08 (eighteen years ago)

Ooh yes, cream teas are lovely. They remind me of holidays, or sunday afternoon drives in the country when I was a kid.

― C J (C J), Friday, 4 August 2006 12:12 (eighteen years ago)

yeah, it's all fun and games till some cunt starts the 'scOne' vs 'scon' shit and someone loses an eye.

― teh_kit haev been evicted, oh noes! (g-kit), Friday, 4 August 2006 12:13 (eighteen years ago)

i've seen it happen TOO MANY TIMES

― teh_kit haev been evicted, oh noes! (g-kit), Friday, 4 August 2006 12:13 (eighteen years ago)

what is clotted cream? it sounds disgusting. like a cervical aneurysm or something. kind of makes the strawberry jam redundant.

― sunny successor (katharine), Friday, 4 August 2006 12:14 (eighteen years ago)

It's "scon".

― C J (C J), Friday, 4 August 2006 12:15 (eighteen years ago)

yeah, and people in glass houses shouldn't throw stons.

p.s clotted cream IS indeed disgusting.

― teh_kit haev been evicted, oh noes! (g-kit), Friday, 4 August 2006 12:16 (eighteen years ago)

today, i am that cunt :(

― teh_kit haev been evicted, oh noes! (g-kit), Friday, 4 August 2006 12:16 (eighteen years ago)

"today"

― teh_kit haev been evicted, oh noes! (g-kit), Friday, 4 August 2006 12:16 (eighteen years ago)

'skon'

― Bashment Jakes (Enrique), Friday, 4 August 2006 12:17 (eighteen years ago)

It's mild compared with the 'Jaffa Cake - cake or biscuit?' debate. That actually split the former Yugoslavia.

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Friday, 4 August 2006 12:18 (eighteen years ago)

are they called Jaffa Biscuits? no.

― teh_kit haev been evicted, oh noes! (g-kit), Friday, 4 August 2006 12:19 (eighteen years ago)

I laugh every time I hear someone refer to the former Yugoslavian town of Porec. PORRIDGE!
What a great name.

― C J (C J), Friday, 4 August 2006 12:21 (eighteen years ago)

Cream teas are undeniably classic. Best ever at Basil Street Hotel for me, haven't been in years. Weirdest ever was about a week ago in Helmsdale at this restaurant: http://www.lamirage.org/index.html

btw clotted cream is the whole point. If you don't have it, you're just eating a scone.

― beanz (beanz), Friday, 4 August 2006 12:21 (eighteen years ago)

what are 'cream teas'?

― teh_kit haev been evicted, oh noes! (g-kit), Friday, 4 August 2006 12:22 (eighteen years ago)

i'm assuming that they're the foodstuff of the title, but it's a dumber name than Jaffa Cakes, if it's so.

― teh_kit haev been evicted, oh noes! (g-kit), Friday, 4 August 2006 12:24 (eighteen years ago)

I had a cream tea in Devon t'other week. Seemed to be the done thing.

― Onimo (GerryNemo), Friday, 4 August 2006 12:25 (eighteen years ago)

i almost just barfed at your post, sunny.

― A Giant Mechanical Ant (The Giant Mechanical Ant), Friday, 4 August 2006 12:25 (eighteen years ago)

http://www.whitsandbayhotel.co.uk/images/creamtea755.jpg

― C J (C J), Friday, 4 August 2006 12:25 (eighteen years ago)

so wrong.

― teh_kit haev been evicted, oh noes! (g-kit), Friday, 4 August 2006 12:27 (eighteen years ago)

what are 'cream teas'?

Scone
Jam
Clotted cream
Pot of tea
Sandwiches (esp cucumber) - optional
Minimum of 2 hours

― beanz (beanz), Friday, 4 August 2006 12:27 (eighteen years ago)

What do you mean by 'wrong'?

― beanz (beanz), Friday, 4 August 2006 12:28 (eighteen years ago)

clotted-unhealthy-cervix-cream

― A Giant Mechanical Ant (The Giant Mechanical Ant), Friday, 4 August 2006 12:30 (eighteen years ago)

that cream looks like cheese, and it's on a scone.

cream that looks like cheese = wrong
scones = wrong

jam is good, though.

― teh_kit haev been evicted, oh noes! (g-kit), Friday, 4 August 2006 12:30 (eighteen years ago)

ITS OFFENDING OUR DELICATE AMERICAN SENSIBILITIES

― sunny successor (katharine), Friday, 4 August 2006 12:31 (eighteen years ago)

scones with clotted cream and strawberry jam

*dies*

― rudy huxtable can't fail (Jody Beth Rosen), Friday, 4 August 2006 12:32 (eighteen years ago)

You have no idea what you're missing. Clotted cream teas are sublime.

― C J (C J), Friday, 4 August 2006 12:32 (eighteen years ago)

They are nice. Clotted cream tastes so much better than it sounds/looks.

― Onimo (GerryNemo), Friday, 4 August 2006 12:33 (eighteen years ago)

i'm not american, but i'd rather eat a cervical aneurysm than that stuff.

― teh_kit haev been evicted, oh noes! (g-kit), Friday, 4 August 2006 12:33 (eighteen years ago)

clotted cream is awesome. you are all nutzor.

― rudy huxtable can't fail (Jody Beth Rosen), Friday, 4 August 2006 12:33 (eighteen years ago)

Ah get one backbone, sunny, a coronary never killed anybody

― beanz (beanz), Friday, 4 August 2006 12:34 (eighteen years ago)

Oh my lord, I started salivating even as I was reading the thread title. You would be SOOO popular if you did that around here, JB.

I almost bought strawberries for my daily berries today but I got raspberries instead. If only I had some clotted cream...

― I'm On The Radio So I Don't Care!!!1! (kate), Friday, 4 August 2006 12:35 (eighteen years ago)

congealed devil-spunk

― A Giant Mechanical Ant (The Giant Mechanical Ant), Friday, 4 August 2006 12:36 (eighteen years ago)

mmmm devil spunk
http://static.flickr.com/35/95538666_2c2d558495_m.jpg

― Onimo (GerryNemo), Friday, 4 August 2006 12:39 (eighteen years ago)

That Chinese cocktail bar in Soho with the name I can never remember does the best cream tea ever. Plain scones, currant scones, and chocolate brownies split in half, with a pot of clotted cream, a pot of strawberry jam, a pot of marscapone, and a pot of honeycomb.

― Dom Passantino (Dom Passantino), Friday, 4 August 2006 12:39 (eighteen years ago)

sounds like a beard disaster waiting to happen.

― teh_kit haev been evicted, oh noes! (g-kit), Friday, 4 August 2006 12:43 (eighteen years ago)

Now that is an image. I want to take Beardy Information Man from Foyles and feed him cream tea. ~~then lick strawberry jam out of his beard.~~

― I'm On The Radio So I Don't Care!!!1! (kate), Friday, 4 August 2006 12:44 (eighteen years ago)

Oh go on, it wasn't that much of a threadkillah.

Or are you all out getting cream teas?

― I'm On The Radio So I Don't Care!!!1! (kate), Friday, 4 August 2006 13:48 (eighteen years ago)

i just had the best lemon scone ever.

― Amateur(ist) (Amateur(ist)), Friday, 4 August 2006 17:55 (eighteen years ago)

the hotel bel air has a champagne cream tea on weekends. expensive, but people love it.

― rudy huxtable can't fail (Jody Beth Rosen), Friday, 4 August 2006 18:16 (eighteen years ago)

I would kill for some good scones right about now. Oh yeah, and bring on the clotted cream and jams while you're at it. It's way too hot for hot tea so iced tea will have to do, but you could do up a lovely iced herbal tea I'm sure. Cucumber sandwiches?? MMM, love them. You know, suddenly I feel very strongly toward having a "cream tea" right about now. Could one have "cream teas" for dinner?

― Phoenix Dancing (krushsister), Friday, 4 August 2006 21:41 (eighteen years ago)

I should definitely try this!

Although, Johnney B, with your culinary prowess, I am surprised that you didn't make the scones.

― MarkH (MarkH), Saturday, 5 August 2006 10:52 (eighteen years ago)

I had to make do with strawberry jamtart at the weekend, as I could not find scones. :-(

it was still very good, though.

― In Search Of The Infinite Freckle (kate), Monday, 7 August 2006 10:43 (eighteen years ago)

I was going to make scones (I usually DO) but my recipe required double cream, so I didn't make them in the end cos I forgot.

We ate the remaining scones/cream/jam after the Sunday Curry. Then drank wine.

I didn't know clotted cream was reviled so much by so many. Although wiki does make it sound disgusting: Clotted cream is a thick yellow cream made by heating and then leaving unpasteurized cow's milk in shallow pans for several hours

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Clotted_cream

― Johnny B Was Quizzical (Johnney B), Monday, 7 August 2006 11:08 (eighteen years ago)

Fuck, that means I'm not allowed it for a while then :(

Pasteurised dairy products are so boring.

― Archel (Archel), Monday, 7 August 2006 11:13 (eighteen years ago)

But I am eating strawberries right now.

― Archel (Archel), Monday, 7 August 2006 11:14 (eighteen years ago)

Oh, should pregnanters not have clotted cream then? My wife is a bad womang.

― Onimo (GerryNemo), Monday, 7 August 2006 11:18 (eighteen years ago)

Well you're supposed to avoid unpasteurised products, I think because of listeria risk which is a bit higher for pregnanters and can harm the baby. But if she hasn't got ill from the clotted cream she won't have done any damage.

― Archel (Archel), Monday, 7 August 2006 11:23 (eighteen years ago)

But surely heating it would kill any bad bacteria?

― In Search Of The Infinite Freckle (kate), Monday, 7 August 2006 11:29 (eighteen years ago)

Probably yes. Not sure about the 'then leaving in shallow pans for several hours' bit though, but is that how it's really made these days anyway???

― Archel (Archel), Monday, 7 August 2006 11:32 (eighteen years ago)

It usually has a yellow crust on it, which I presume comes from being cooled. Hence it must cool in the tub, I suppose. I can't imagine they'd let nastiness in it these days, H&S would be on them like a shot.

― Johnny B Was Quizzical (Johnney B), Monday, 7 August 2006 11:37 (eighteen years ago)

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