How do you treat someone who has herpes?

My doctor said he estimates that number being too conservative and would place it more around 80%. Nevertheless, he said that basically a regular, frequent sexual relationship in which one partner has herpes is bound to eventually transmit, even with all precautions taken (never having sex during an outbreak, taking medication, using condoms, etc).

Hstencil, if you're trying to say that you think I'm Nate Patrin, guess again.

Also true for hepatitis.

my ex wife had genital herpes and i never got it fromher despite being together three years. of course, the reason we broke up is we weren't sexually compatible so we didn't really have a TON of sex or anything. i've been tested half a dozen times since --and we're broken up like 8 years now-- so it's possible to avoid imho!

OTM. Given the way you feel about this girl, and the way she feels about you, you need to pursue this. Turning your back on someone like that will fuck you up, and her up, far worse than herpes ever could.

Also, yes with medication and rubbers yr supposed to be fine... but why ask here? Theres no doctorbs here. Go see a GP for advice! Thats what they're there for dammit!

Like a human being? holy shit. . . This is the least worrisome STD ever. Yes having it can be embarrassing and a pain the ass, but it doesn't kill you. Be ressponsible, both of you take precautions (anti-viral meds, condoms, abstiencence during sex) and it will probably be a-okay. If you love her, these are minor things.

Get a grip.

god . .I always post rushed and horribly here but especially so when not finished with my first coffee.

I trust everyone on ILx is smart enough to figure out what I'm trying to say.

cobdoms? I so wanna know what that is.

I thought the danger was possible blindness. Doctors are on top of this and will usually prescribe heavy anti-virals near time of birth to ward off an outbreak. and c-sections are options as well.

If I was to get herpes, and we were to break up one day, then what?

I imagine herpes killing your sex life. Can a person have sex with someone without telling them they are herpes positive and remain morally sound? I don't think so. Judging from what my friends have said that I've spoken with about this, if someone did that to them, they would be furious. So there goes any sort of casual sex! All you can do is hope to build a good enough relationship with someone so that they'd be okay when you break the news. I don't think this is as easy as you guys make it sound.

Do any of you have herpes? I don't feel as confident about this as you guys.

If anything, maybe it would force you to be more responsible in your sex life. Yes you would absolutely need to tell people in order not to be a flaming fucking asshole. So perhaps you would only enter into intimate relationships with people you were interested enough in, and confident enough with, to be comfortably honest. Unless they were flaming fucking assholes they would appreciate your honesty and courage and probably think more of you for it.

xpost laurel, yes mostly. viruses never go away completely but definitely can go into remission.
The world would over all, be a better place I'm sure.

i need to stop my broken posting and focus on designing some logos rather than anything WORD-ORIENTED obv.

!!!

sudden flashbacks of past girlfriends and saran wrap "dental dams". argh. MsMisery,off thread, NOW!

Q: Could anyone provide information on herpes and vaginal birth vs. c-section? A client is considering opting for a c-section rather than risk the possibility of transmitting it to her newborn (She is currently at 27 weeks). Any suggestions or information/resources would be appreciated.
-Anon.

My first experience with the issue of vaginal herpes outbreak (subsequent, not primary) just prior to delivery was my own birth. I was attended by an OB/GYN and had a hospital birth. I was afraid to tell him that I thought I was starting to get an outbreak, but with all the risks I'd heard about, I knew I had to. The day before I went into labor, I showed him the blister during an exam and he told me it was small enough and far enough away from the birth canal, that he could just cover the area with a 4x4 pad during the delivery. The blister was inside the labia majora near the clitoris. I was very relieved! I had a vaginal birth the next day.

The second time I encountered the situation was with a client who had contracted herpes many years previous. She had one outbreak around 22 weeks and she too was very worried. She was aware of what foods and stressors triggered her outbreak and avoided them, but ended up having another at 39 weeks. I called a family physician (who delivered babies) at the clinic in the woman's town to ask if the woman could have an internal culture done to rule out an internal lesion. He told me that internal lesions nearly always ONLY occur with INITIAL outbreaks, and the risk of internal lesions with subsequent outbreaks (especially if she's had herpes for several years) is miniscule. He told me that if the lesion is not on the perineum, she could deliver vaginally virtually without risk. I was a little surprised, as this contradicted a lot of the information I had read about the seriousness and fear of herpes and vaginal birth.

Finally, just recently, I had a client who (as she had done with her last pregnancy with a CNM) decided to take a viral suppressant beginning at 38 weeks.
-Paula Bernini
====

While I can't recall the source of the information, I remember reading a while back of midwives administering superglue during labor over the herpes lesions to prevent transmission from mother to baby. It's worth looking into.
~Amy Jones
====

My question is how often is this woman having outbreaks? Also, did she have her first outbreak during this pregnancy or is she just having secondary outbreaks? If she is having secondary outbreaks, then perhaps a change in stress levels, diet, exercise could help her have less outbreaks. If all else fails and she is having frequent outbreaks I would offer to put her on Acyclovir, oral, for her last trimester, thus avoiding an outbreak at term.
-Annette Manant CNM
====

Order the Midwifery Today conference tape "Herpes" (Item No. 941T79). Andrea Dixon discusses symptoms, how to help infected women avoid outbreaks, and what conditions may activate the virus. Regular price $9; E-News special $7.50 (plus shipping & handling) when you mention Code 940.
Call 1-800-743-0974 to order. Offer good through March 17.
o=o=o=o=o=o

If you're not mature enough to accept that sex sometimes has consequences that aren't entirely pleasant, and deal with them in the appropriate way, then you're not really mature enough to be having sex, are you?

Dear ex-gf,

Guess what! We can totally have that baby. Nothing to be afraid of! Let's get to spawning.

Yr pal,

ex-bf

This is the most troubling part of the story. Why is she not concerned about whether she gave it to you or not?

My 2 year old nephew was just diagnosed with herpes yesterday. Supposedly there are several strains, and the doctor told his parents 60% of kids have some form of herpes by the time they reach high school??? Is there some huge hidden world of herpes going on under my nose I have no idea about?

Kate, ok then, how do I deal with these consequences in the appropriate way? If it's so easy to say that I'm not dealing with this appropriately, can you tell me what the appropriate path would be?

From what my doctor said before, if I am to have regular sex with her, it's pretty certain that sooner or later I would contract herpes. Contracting herpes, I believe, would be a big deal. I haven't said much about myself here, other than what can be implied. Here's something: I am young. I do enjoy casual sex. I understand there are risks involved. But there's a difference between risk with someone who you don't know their disease-status, and someone who you know is absolutely, positively positive.

You've got it backwards there, Ramzi.

Yeah, who cares about herpes. In most people the outbreaks taper off after a time anyway.

-- Chris H. (chrisherbert), Thursday, 25 January 2007 15:25 (10 months ago) Link

Is herpes like HPV, in that after a while the immune system fights it off and suppresses it far enough that you only have outbreaks if otherwise sick or very stressed? In fact some people apparently fight off HPV so effectively that it's GONE gone. Like, not just lurking around. Dunno if the same is true in this case.

-- Laurel (Laurel), Thursday, 25 January 2007 15:52 (10 months ago) Link

not to downplay its seriousness, but a bit of anecdotal evidence: my ex's friend (no, really!) contracted Teh Herps back in the mid-80's when she was a jet-setting, coke-snorting 20 y.o. model. FReaked her out something fierce. But after moving back home and cleaning up etc, her outbreaks (which were fairly infrequent to begin with) pretty much disappeared. In fact, she's been nearly 20 years now without an outbreak. Obviously she could still likely transmit it if not careful, but there you go.

wait what do i have backwards? u mean i'm taking it kind of hard? i guess... i wasn't sure what to say to her.

thats good to hear will

First she took it hard, then the herpes.

baaaad!

terrible

In ref to Laurel's q - yeah, certain people's bodies can suppress HPV enough so that it is considered gone.

Will's story above, that's pretty typical. My best friend has herpes and the first couple years after she contracted it it was vicious. She had horrible horrible outbreaks almost monthly. Now she can't remember the last time she had one. Viruses are just so weird like that. It could just lay dormant forever or she could have an outbreak 20 years from now. You just never know.

Also, people who only ever get one outbreak might be more common than we think since one in five adults has herpes but up to 80% don't know it. A lot of women, for instance, expect to see blisters but if it presents atypically then they write it off as a yeast infection or something else equally benign.

okay i don't want to look it up at work, but i am a very sheltered young man, and what the fuck is a herpes outbreak like anyway? no pictures please. just gory texts.

ya gory texts.

A friend of mine got a Prince Albert and then very soon thereafter, herpes. His first outbreak he thought was a PA infection.

I'm not one to infer cause from effect here, but y'might suspect that genital piercings could render one more vulnerable to STDs, especially when no "protection" is used, eh?

Jesus christ. That is a hellacious thing to have happen to a peen.

what does herpes look like:
bloodu open wounds on your dick n balls

When the piercing is new and the skin hasn't reformed all along the...incision, then yes I imagine it would increase yr risk. Eventually though it should all be sealed through with regular skin like any other body part.

I could be mis-quoting, but I feel like I've heard that if you catch the very first outbreak early on and go full-tilt with the Valtrex there's a good chance you may never see an outbreak again.

why isn't there a herpes vaccine or something? i'd get that. in fact i may get the hpv one, if grownups are allowed.

i think the hpv vaccine is for women?

oh ha that makes sense.

yes, open wounds way increases your risk of getting a virus. and herpes increases your risk of getting aids (because of cases where there are open sores [i.e. not many, actually]).

Yeah, it is. Gardasil. And it's for women of all ages, natch. They are working on one for men.

I am in a forever-type relationship but I still want to get it out of listless, unjustified paranoia, but mainly to "be one more" like the ad says just to show there is support for this kind of vaccine in our weird country that in some circles pretends it is a sluttening vaccine. Maybe if they had stats showing a v large number of people got it, that unjustified stigma would wane somewhat.

Also I just absolutely adore vaccines; Dr. Jenner, Dr. Koch & Dr. Pasteur are some of my biggest heroes ever so it's like "Yes! I want all of these vaccines bcz vaccines improve life for all."

couple of xps

If there were a sluttening vaccine, I am sure I would have gotten it.

the stigma about the hpv vaccine makes me want to stab people.

i was unaware of this stigma, seriously

"If we give it to young women they will have sex," like solely bcz they have reduced risk of cancer and not bcz, you know, there are 800 million billion reasons people eventually have sex.

i'm not surprised

cos only whores get cervical cancer, obvs. xp

just cos you're in a forever-type relationship doesn't mean you shouldn't get it anyway, because, well, i won't be a weirdo/downer but things happen and being vaccinated is never a bad call anyway! i wouldn't call it paranoia, because there's nothing irrational about being vaccinated for things that are rampant in our culture (malaria, on the other hand, if you are not travelling... that'd be a littel kooky). but i agree re: the support thing. it's like wearing one of those little yellow wrist bands without the idiocy of actually wearing one

couple of xposts... yeah, the stigma is ridiculous. they were trying to give it to kids in schools, kinda like how now 12-y-olds get Hep B shots in Ontario... and people were like "WHAT THAT ENCOURAGES UNPROTECTED GAY ANAL SEX WITH DOGS IN OUR YOUTH!" and it was almost unanimously blocked which is just befuddling and shocking. "IF MY KID HAS SEX UNPROTECTED, IT SHOULD BE A LEARNING EXPERIENCE. A CERVICAL CANCER LEARNING EXPERIENCE."

more xposts.

No I srsly want all the vaccines bcz if for no other reasons I love the vaccines so much! Like I am jealous of military buds who got the smallpox shot, bcz I have loved Dr. Jenner bcz I was nine and how am I going to do an appropriate tribute to him otherwise? (Aside from the comic I did back then of a milkmaid thinking "I know Dr. Jenner loves me for who I am, and not because I don't get smallpox.")

that is the greatest comic i have ever heard, you should either find it and scan it and post it, or recreate it in paint!

Yeah, it is. Gardasil. And it's for women of all ages, natch. They are working on one for men.

Right now it's only available for girls and women between the ages of 9-26.

missed the boat

Oh fudge. I am sorry I did not do my homework.

Heh panty crickets.

i suddenly became real health conscious after realizing how contagious herpes can be

"most people have been infected by at least 1 herpes subtype before adulthood."

I'm frightened.. I met a girl with herpes, she didn't say what kind, and I thought she was cool and stuff, but herpes..
For some reason I think that my mouth is stinging mildly (but I smoked a lot last night). Oral herpes is very contagious and I worry I drank from this girl's beer. I'm over reacting. The odds are I didn't drink from her beer or kiss her but there was that one beer I stole from a table at a titty bar last week... shit man, STDs scare me.

lol at cold sores being STDs.

STDs scare everyone, and most everyone has had some sort of something, whether it be something as harmless as crabs, or something as ambiguous as herpes of the mouth. don't worry about it.

I think the reason my tongue is tingling today is the nicotine gum I tried yesterday. I still should screen myself one of these days. I remember thinking I had HIV once because I had sex with a stranger. Well I'm a healthy person apart from smoking and eating junk food so I'm pretty sure I don't have any STDS (at least any that flare up).

I'm still frightened of stds because of my lack of knowledge. I never really talked to anyone about their STD - as I have never asked anyone whether they have stds - and no one has ever brought it up before. I mean, some girl said she would get a rash and itch sometimes but other than that I have no idea how bad the common ones really are.

http://www.whiteninjacomics.com/images/comics/nosebleed.gif

well, you should go to a doctor and get the works done. it feels good to get it done.

the reason herpes scares ppl is cuz there's no cure. the symptoms can be nonexistent but you can't just like have sex without talking about it first. gonorrhea, chlamydia, crabs, syphilis can all be treated and cured (i think). the symptoms can be very mild or not so.

watch out for that nicotine gum.

Is having lots of NSA sex worth possibly getting Herpes in your opinions? I mean, I haven't been laid in a year.

uhoh I sense a truth bomb in my last post

jesus christ no

god damnit my chances always suck and when I finally get a chance its with someone who has herpes
just my luck

hang on did i misunderstand your post? NSA?

no strings attached

u should know that

oh. i read the NS bit as not safe for some reason. sure go ahead

soz

My id likes that opinion a lot, thx
can I get a 2nd and 3rd opinion from anyone else though?

thought this revive would be about cb.

the whole herpes phear thing seems to be a really american concern. no-one in the uk gives a toss...go for it.

lorax's tingling tongue is fucking killing me here. i trust you ended up okay youngblood?