Don't You SEE??

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Yesterday I saw a shop called NIN COM SOUP!!! How I larffed! What a funny pun!! Don't you SEE??

Things that I don't see include SIGHT - are we watching FREQUENCIES and not actual things? Because light bounces off stuff at a certain hue red yellow whatever - so we are not seeing the THING we are seeing the LIGHT BOUNCING - are we in fact watching TIME?!?!?!? I don't see!

What don't you see? (Anna you should not ask to start threads when I am in a starvation based spaz chariot).

― Sarah, Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Ha Ha yes 'the sense in this question'! I supose you could say we are not seeing the stars as they actually are as the light takes so long to travel towards us and in fact we are not seeing what is there but a TIME REPRESENTATION OF IT!

I would make a GRATE medieval mystic I reckon. It's all FAERIE.

― Sarah, Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

I don't see what all the fuss is about.

― Emma, Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Emma it is about PERCEPTIONS OF REALITY!

― Sarah, Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Austin Flowers! (On the number 10 bus route. It is a florist o'course).

I only realised a couple of weeks ago that Sandie Shaw was not her real name. Duh! But yes Sarah, we are seeing time...Which is one of the key arguments in my proof that the Universe is not infinite.

― Pete, Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Ah but have you tried their soups. Bangers and mash soup, oh my god, also lovely bread to mop it up with.

― Ed, Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Restaurant in Edinburgh: Beef Encounter

― mms, Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

starvation based spaz chariot

Favourite phrase of the day!

― mms, Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

where is this nin com soup you speak of, that sells this fabulous bangers and mash liquid dinner?

― chris, Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

I only realised a couple of weeks ago that Sandie Shaw was not her real name.

There seems to have been a spate of this lately - someone on Robert Elms was saying the same thing. Or was that when you realised too?

Did the starvation based spaz chariot not get Emma's joke?

I can't see the wood for the trees. And the overpopuloused concrete hell of inner London.

― N., Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

I thought it would be bad etiquette to point out my own joke. Also it was a pretty shite joke.

― Emma, Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

This isn't strictly within the rules of the game, but I heart it so much anyway: last year on the bus back from ATP we saw THE COCK PHARMACY.

― Edna Welthorpe, Mrs, Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

I have no idea if there is more than one but there is one in Old Street tube station.

― Ed, Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Oi! Stars! This time based representation thing = on crack. What you are seeing is the light emitted/reflected/refracted through stuff. Light != time.

― RickyT, Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Yeah, well that figures.

― N., Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

That was a response to Ed, not RickyT's physic.

― N., Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

laundry in Turnham Green: Turn 'Em Clean. I shit you not

― Alan Trewartha, Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

All hairdressers' ever must, by law, have bad puns in their names if they are not named after chief cutter(s). See: Cutting Crew, A Cut Above, Hair Today Gone Tomorrow etc.

― RickyT, Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Ricky, that's not true. There is a hairdressers at Newington Green called 'Off To The Woods' and one in Dalston called 'It Will Grow Back', neither of which are puns.

― N., Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Hmmm, yes. Bad jokes rather than puns then.

― RickyT, Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

My favourite shop names aren't puns, but those generic names like "Curtains Express", "World of Vases", "Log Rack". I genuinely laughed my entire ass off when I saw the very real "Mr Trousers"

― Alan Trewartha, Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

In one area of Sheffield alone:

Whichcraft: craft and haberdashery On a Roll: sandwiches Paws for Thought: Pet shop Laying the Foundations: women's underwear

― Anna, Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

My best-beloved shop name is WOW - World Of Wigs And Weaves, on my walk into Headington. It's never open.

― Tom, Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

I don't get the 'Off to the Woods' joke. Can someone explain it to me?

― N., Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

I still can't see past Schindlers Lifts, as amusing company names go.

There's an odd shop that sells potatoes (filled and stuff, yes that's odd too I know) called Spud-U-Like. What does it mean? I don't know. Is it a pun? Would you like maybe? It's just fuckin bizarre.

― Ronan, Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

I don't get it either.

― Jonnie, Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

hairdressers also sometimes have names like, well for inst there 's one in oamaru called "Salon (something)" with an accent grave over the O.

― , Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Oh, so it's not just me then? It seemed like such an odd name that it must be a joke of some sort.

― RickyT, Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Spud-U-LIke was a big thing in the 80s over here. Don't know if there are any left. It's not supposed to be a 'joke' as such, Ronan - just a snappy, American-style name that everyone liked to take the piss out of. Like I Can't Believe It's Not x and x-'r'-us.

― N., Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Spud U Like in Manchester too! Also I love the crap takeaway ABRA- KEBAB- RA which is not quite a DON'T YOU SEE but I like mentioning it.

This time based representation thing = on crack. What you are seeing is the light emitted/reflected/refracted through stuff. Light != time.

THEN WHAT IS TIME??? And can we eat it? The thing is I am seeing the PAST - when do I get to see the future and the present as TIME ALWAYS HAPPENS?!

― Sarah, Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

my mum pronounced spud-u-like as twere french viz: sp'doolickay

― mark s, Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Then there is the Sherwood florist in the oh so funny ne Lloyds advert, which I kind of like as Joely Richardson says "Cabbage" quite nicely and it makes me look up and see her.

― chris, Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

You are seeing events in the past, not time itself!

― RickyT, Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

How do you KNOW though? What really IS time?!

― Sarah, Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Ah I see it is just a concept! The thing is that I reckon we have potential to see forever but we can't because SOMETHING ALWAYS STOPS. For example I can see my computer screen - how far does my sight REALLY go that I cannot see? And when I look up into the sky and see a star I am seeing something - we can never see NOTHING! Arrgh!!

― Sarah, Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

No it more than a concept, according to physics. Whatever that means. Or so I am told.

― N., Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

My dad also did the sp'doolickay thing. He also wanted to buy a franchise for one in the mid-eighties. Fortunately (for him and his hypothetical customers) he didn't. I learned recently that I DON'T SEE punning album titles, viz. 'Another Side of Bob Dylan' (d'you see???), although I still don't agree that 'Rubber Soul' counts as a proper pun (yes, yes, soul/sole, but how is a rubber sole (shoe-type) a funny pun w/ soul???.

― Ellie, Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

hadn't mccartney heard someone describe something — possibly that band he wuz in before wings — as PLASTIC SOUL? ("plastic" being a diss-word in the 60s)

― mark s, Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

You cannot see forever, because light has not been coming forever.

― Pete, Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Yes but still - d'you see? - how's the SHOE part funny? Still, probly my deluded bf is the only person in the world who thinks it's a hilarious pun, so it seems kind of pointless trying to have this argument with anyone else. Carry on.

― Ellie, Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

I think it was coined by black musicians when talking about whiteys like the Stones trying to do R'n'B. McCartney obviously liked the phrase and can be heard muttering it at the end of the Anthology version of 'I'm Down'.

― N., Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Rubber chicken = Fake Chicken
Rubber lips = fake lips
Rubber soul = fake soul
Rubber Sole = Shoe.
Ha Ha.

― Pete, Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

In Bristol there is a furniture shop called Sofa So Good. Re: Sandie Shaw, I missed Perry Farrell and Manda Rin.

― MarkH, Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

I thought SELL FRIDGES would be the best name for a white goods store ever, then I saw a white goods store called SELL FRIDGES and thought it looked a bit corny.

There is a hair stylist in sunny Bermondsey called "Spendloads - Please". It's a continuing source of bewilderment.

― , Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

I'm confused. Is it lunchtime?

― Calumn, Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

On Primrose Hill last summer I saw a khaki skip with that funny template style writing where the letters don't join up which the army uses. The skip hire firm was called BATTLESKIPS.

― MarkH, Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

In Greenwich, there used to be a second hand furniture shop called NO IKEA - admittedly a lamoid pun. But it sent shockwaves through the world of Scandinavian self-assembly to such an extent the multinational took the little man to court and made him change the name back to NO IDEA.

― Edna Welthorpe, Mrs, Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

There was an even more ridiculous example in the early eighties when a garden gnome shop somewhere in London was taken to court by BHS because it was called British Gnome Stores. Presumably now it wouldn't be an issue because BHS themselves are only known by the abbreviation (as they always have been in Eire, for obvious reasons).

― MarkH, Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

I think NO IKEA is just up the road from a truly mentalist off- licence - Unwins, which last time I was in there 6 months back, was like a trip back to 1974. It had a very strange carpet, a little fountain and the assistant was an ancient bloke who wore a tank top and national health specs. When he came out from behind the counter i noticed that he had carpet slippers on. Do you know this place, Edna?

― Dr. C, Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

does the little fountain have water in it, or something somewhat stronger?

― MarkH, Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

There is a childrens clothes shop in Glasgow called Weans World. Everything we see is in the past. It's something to think about.

― Ally C, Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Presented for your approval, some contenders from the Toronto area - A pub/cafe called 'C'est What', another called 'Fred's Not Here' (like they answer the phone "Hello, Fred's not..." Geddit? Geddit?) a pizzeria named 'The Pizzabilities are Endless' and last but not least, a dog groomers called 'The Laundro Mutt'. Uh huh.

― Kim, Wednesday, 13 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Why isn't Oi Bagel called Oy Bagel?

― rosemary, Thursday, 14 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

you are on drugs okay

― Dan I., Thursday, 14 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

There is a launderette on the Fulham Road called 'Go Gay'. Isn't it a terrible shame when perfectly good names for launderettes are appropriated by the blah blah blah....

― Andrew L, Thursday, 14 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Ah well that's Fulham for you. I am well acquainted with Go Gay, also GAY STREET in Putney which certainly not the Arsemonkey and I made a special trip to go and photograph and ur... ahem... we certainly didn't jump off the bus to photograph Go Gay either.

― Sarah, Thursday, 14 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

not far from 'wean's world': 'the tot spot'. must be the children's fashion district.

on the high street in edinburgh, a souvenir shop: 'thistle do nicely'.

― richard john gillanders, Thursday, 14 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Oh dear. Gaylord Indian Restaurant on the Isle of Dogs. AND THERES TONS OF THEM! I have to keep referring to the menu to see if that can possibly be right. And it can. And now I want curry. !!!!

― Sarah, Thursday, 14 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Butcher on Queen's Crescent a few years back: Mr Meat.

King's Road cowboy boot shop: R Soles

― suzy, Thursday, 14 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Ah, that's reminded me. A halal butcher's on Walthamstow High Street used to be called Pak Butchers. It's not any more though.

― Jonnie, Thursday, 14 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

cool Hiardressers in Leyton = Lunatic Fringe

― chris, Thursday, 14 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

hairdressers even, goddammit

― chris, Thursday, 14 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

gallery for yrs in theobald's road called GALERIE SINGLETON ahaha

in shrewsbury when i was young (on wyle cop) there were two shops next to each other BLUES STEEL FELL THIS MORNING (= specialist rekkid shop) and UNISEX HAIRBENDERS (= yes you guessed)

UH wuz i think the shop in which the man polishing his glasses under the thing they put over you when cutting yr hair = bopped on the head by girl hairdresser who assumed THE WORST!!

― mark s, Thursday, 14 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

I think things get a bit easier to understand when you remember that none of this exists. I don't exist, you don't, Afro Ken certainly doesn't. It's all in your mind. If we all see things differently then none of these things are real in an objective sense..and that's all that matters*. However, you don't need to believe this, as I am just a figment of your imagination. Also, I needn't give a shit whether you believe me, because I am similarly non existent. The hairdresser in Kidlington is called Snips, but that is neither a pun, nor amusing.

― alix, Thursday, 14 February 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

eight months pass...

There's a shop in Manchester (and maybe other places, I'm ignorant) called U^th. AAAARG.

― Graham (graham), Wednesday, 30 October 2002 13:11 (twenty-two years ago)

Roland Butter, sandwich shop. Shudder.

― Madchen (Madchen), Wednesday, 30 October 2002 13:18 (twenty-two years ago)

they're everywhere Graham, it's a range of another clothes shop which I can't for the life of me remember right now. Is it Jigsaw?

― chris (chris), Wednesday, 30 October 2002 13:19 (twenty-two years ago)

There used to be a haidressers on Cheetham Hill Road in Manchester called 'P and B Dunn'. It never ceased to make me chuckle, and still doesn't, even though it has sadly closed...

― Dave B (daveb), Wednesday, 30 October 2002 13:20 (twenty-two years ago)

i've seen a baker's called 'barmageddon' which is spectacularly incongruous.

― michael wells (michael w.), Wednesday, 30 October 2002 13:24 (twenty-two years ago)

There's a funeral director's down the road called "B. Littler and Sons". I can provide photographic evidence.

― Graham (graham), Wednesday, 30 October 2002 13:28 (twenty-two years ago)

michael i don't SEE

― mark s (mark s), Wednesday, 30 October 2002 13:29 (twenty-two years ago)

you're from the wrong part of the country mr S, it is actually quite funny. Barm = bread roll = bread cob etc etc etc

― chris (chris), Wednesday, 30 October 2002 13:32 (twenty-two years ago)

There was a greengrocer in Sidmouth called Effie Tuckers which used to make me all Spoonerish. Also there's a greasy spoon in Surrey Quays called Al-Quays, which I suppose must be a pun of sorts.

― Tim (Tim), Wednesday, 30 October 2002 13:35 (twenty-two years ago)

Dave B, I don't SEE??

― Graham (graham), Wednesday, 30 October 2002 13:36 (twenty-two years ago)

That's barmy.

(sorry)

― Miss Laura, Wednesday, 30 October 2002 13:36 (twenty-two years ago)

I think Jigsaw sold off their Menswear division and Uth was the name the new owners chose.

― N. (nickdastoor), Wednesday, 30 October 2002 13:48 (twenty-two years ago)

I only realised yesterday that the airline BMI's (mooted) low-cost division, BMI Baby is a terrific pun.

― N. (nickdastoor), Wednesday, 30 October 2002 13:50 (twenty-two years ago)

N, even Jeremy Bowen got that pun the day the name was announced.

― Tim (Tim), Wednesday, 30 October 2002 13:52 (twenty-two years ago)

On a visit to Sheffield I saw a restaurant called Kumquat Mae.

There was also a hairdresser called British Hairways. What is it with hairdressers?

― Alfie (Alfie), Wednesday, 30 October 2002 14:01 (twenty-two years ago)

I've seen a sunbed salon called Tanarife somewhere, just can't remember where though....

― Plinky (Plinky), Wednesday, 30 October 2002 14:10 (twenty-two years ago)

V gd: Chip shop in Box, Somerset - The Fat Friar. Inherently amusing village names in the West Country! See also Curry Mallet, up the road from Beer Crocombe. DYS?

Also, down Stroud Green Road in my 'manor' we have a selection of hair-relaxing product shops including Pak Hair and World of Wigs & Weaves. WOWW. Not punny ha-ha, just punny peculiar.

My mother bought her current house through an estate agents called Crook & Blight. If that's not going to encourage you, what will?

― Liz :x (Liz :x), Wednesday, 30 October 2002 14:13 (twenty-two years ago)

oh yeah, my mates dad runs a kebab shop called 'abrakebabra'.

― michael wells (michael w.), Wednesday, 30 October 2002 14:14 (twenty-two years ago)

causes!

― Josh (Josh), Wednesday, 30 October 2002 14:35 (twenty-two years ago)

michael: is that true? i thort this was just mary whitehouse experience legend. (it was on the kilburn high road acc to them, but not by the time i lived near there)

― Alan (Alan), Wednesday, 30 October 2002 14:39 (twenty-two years ago)

Graham - bit rub of me really. Not so much a witticism but puerile sub-Benny Hill gag. But the shop did exist.

― Dave B (daveb), Wednesday, 30 October 2002 14:45 (twenty-two years ago)

yes, it's true. this one's in greater manchester, though. unless my mate's lying to me in which case he's kept up the pretence for five or six years...hang on...why you little...

― michael wells (michael w.), Wednesday, 30 October 2002 14:46 (twenty-two years ago)

Abrakebabra is all over Ireland.

― Ronan (Ronan), Wednesday, 30 October 2002 14:54 (twenty-two years ago)

Er, Abrakebabra (inf. Abra) are a fairly massive Dublin chain of kebab shops.

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Wednesday, 30 October 2002 14:56 (twenty-two years ago)

There are shedloads of Abra Kebabra's in Dublin. Its a franchise donchaknow.

― Pete (Pete), Wednesday, 30 October 2002 14:57 (twenty-two years ago)

you have franchised kebab chains over there?

― michael wells (michael w.), Wednesday, 30 October 2002 15:00 (twenty-two years ago)

I used to pass a salon called Hair Apocalypse. I think maybe they were millenarian Christians? I don't SEE but I never got off the bus to check it out.

Also, a pet groomer called Doggy Styles. At a party I was actually recounting how funny that was to a stranger who turned out to be the sister of the owner, and the sister didn't SEE! I didn't explain.

Also, a frame shop called The Framing Dragon.

― Paul Eater (eater), Wednesday, 30 October 2002 15:55 (twenty-two years ago)

I was always pleased that I'd seen a shop called "Mr Trousers", but someone else (I forget who) trumped that by saying that they had seen a "Mr Central Heating". oh so clever.

― Alan (Alan), Wednesday, 30 October 2002 15:58 (twenty-two years ago)

It was me! Mr Central Heating is visible from the train to Southend if you leave from Liverpool St.

At least Mr. CD is a pun of sorts. But whoever missed a central heating?

― Tim (Tim), Wednesday, 30 October 2002 16:22 (twenty-two years ago)

on the way to disneyland is HOSE MAN

― chaki (chaki), Wednesday, 30 October 2002 16:29 (twenty-two years ago)

hung phat nyc chinatown
companion in london: poons

― mary b. (mary b.), Wednesday, 30 October 2002 16:46 (twenty-two years ago)

Sweet Cheeses

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Wednesday, 30 October 2002 17:49 (twenty-two years ago)

Melon-cauli - greengrocers in Swindon.

― Tag, Wednesday, 30 October 2002 18:02 (twenty-two years ago)

There used to be a hairdressers by the Tate Modern called Teté Moderne.

As this thread is kebab laden, it seems fair to ask if anyone has heard of the mythical Kebab Vending Machine in Sheperds Bush (or is it Hammersmith?)
It's a Machine That Vends Kebabs. Unless someone is having me on, this is the greatest invention evah!

― Simeon (Simeon), Wednesday, 30 October 2002 18:11 (twenty-two years ago)

There's a photo developing place in Acton called "Ginger Snaps" I hope it is named after the film.

― jel -- (jel), Wednesday, 30 October 2002 18:34 (twenty-two years ago)

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