On Fire!

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During a recent ecumenical gathering, a secretary rushed in shouting, "The building is on fire!"

The Methodists gathered in the corner and prayed.

The Baptists cried, "Where is the water?"

The Quakers quietly praised God for the blessings that fire brings.

The Lutherans posted a notice on the door declaring the fire was evil.

The Roman Catholics passed the plate to cover the damage.

The Congregationalists shouted, "Every man for himself!"

The Fundamentalists proclaimed, "It's the vengeance of God!"

The Episcopalians formed a procession and marched out.

The Christian Scientists concluded that there was no fire.

The Presbyterians appointed a chairperson who was to appoint a committee to look into the matter and submit a written report.

The Jews posted symbols on the door hoping the fire would pass.

The Muslims started the fire.

― and what (ooo), Friday, 2 February 2007 20:46 (eighteen years ago)

where the atheists at?

― milo z (mlp), Friday, 2 February 2007 20:48 (eighteen years ago)

Do these come from one or two coworkers in particular, or just random relatives w/ a 50+ cc: count?

― kingfishy (kingfish 2.0), Friday, 2 February 2007 20:48 (eighteen years ago)

Your search - "the muslims started the fire" - did not match any documents.
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however:

During a recent ecumenical gathering, a secretary rushed in shouting, "The building is on fire!"

What would your denomination do if a fire came? Perhaps...

The Methodists gathered in the corner and prayed - or at least the ones who still believed in prayer.

The Baptists cried, "Where is the water?"

The Quakers quietly sat and praised God for the blessings that fire brings.

The Lutherans posted a notice on the door declaring the fire was evil.

The Roman Catholics passed the plate to help cover the damages.

The Jews posted symbols on the door and hoped that this fire would pass.

The Congregationalists shouted, "Every man for himself!"

The Fundamentalists proclaimed, "It's the vengeance of God! We told you it was coming."

The Anglicans formed a procession and marched out.

The Christian Scientists concluded that there was ultimately no real fire.

The Presbyterians appointed a chairperson who was to appoint a committee to look into the matter and submit a written report.

The Pentecostals all lifted their hands, spoke in tongues and rebuked the devil.

The secretary grabbed the fire extinguisher and put the fire out.

― Curt1s St3ph3ns, Friday, 2 February 2007 20:53 (eighteen years ago)

ironic all muslims jews are grouped and eastern orthodox traditions are written off

― UART variations (ex machina), Friday, 2 February 2007 20:54 (eighteen years ago)

for some real fun, google "nominal christians"

― kingfishy (kingfish 2.0), Friday, 2 February 2007 20:55 (eighteen years ago)

http://images.starpulse.com/AMGPhotos/pic200/drp100/p138/p13886t171a.jpg
The Muslims started the fire, srsly.

― jhoshea (scoopsnoodle), Friday, 2 February 2007 21:02 (eighteen years ago)

you should do a puppet show about that

― Haikunym (Haikunym), Friday, 2 February 2007 21:03 (eighteen years ago)

I wanted this to be a Galaxie 500 thread.

― honey with ice pants (kenan), Friday, 2 February 2007 21:04 (eighteen years ago)

curtis i thought the original version had too much of a pre-9/11 mentality

― and what (ooo), Friday, 2 February 2007 21:07 (eighteen years ago)

What would your denomination do if a fire came?

(...)

The Jews posted symbols on the door and hoped that this fire would pass

lmao @ judaism as a denomination of christianity

― and what (ooo), Friday, 2 February 2007 21:11 (eighteen years ago)

haha

xpost

― Curt1s St3ph3ns, Friday, 2 February 2007 21:12 (eighteen years ago)

The Greek Orthodox made a numerous statuettes of the fire, then dipped them in gold paint.
The Russian Orthodox painted a picture of the fire, then covered the picture with a gold inlay, then set it in a frame with twice the surface area of the picture itself.

The Coptic Orthodox were all like, "Eh, fire, what, I've never seen a fire before? Please."

― nabisco (nabisco), Friday, 2 February 2007 21:20 (eighteen years ago)

The Secular humanists prayed to evolution.
The athiests summoned SATAN and had an orgy with the corpses of the children.
The media blamed the christians.
The professors started the fire.

― Fleischhutliebe! like a warm, furry meatloaf (Fluffy Bear Hearts Rainbows), Friday, 2 February 2007 21:22 (eighteen years ago)

The Catholics used the distraction caused by the fire to rape a five year old boy.

― Dom Passantino (Dom Passantino), Friday, 2 February 2007 21:24 (eighteen years ago)

wtf with all the religion threads today!

― Shakey Mo Collier (Shakey Mo Collier), Friday, 2 February 2007 21:24 (eighteen years ago)

Rock and Roller cola wars, I can't take it anymore.

― N.i.c.o.l.e (Ex Leon), Friday, 2 February 2007 21:41 (eighteen years ago)

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