Van Damme on the subject of air

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From wikipedia:

"I am fascinated by air. If you remove the air from the sky, all the birds would fall to the ground. And all the planes, too."
"When I walk across my living room from my chiminey to my window, it takes me ten seconds, but for a bird it takes one second, and for oxygen zero seconds!"
"Air is beautiful, yet you cannot see it. It's soft, yet you cannot touch it. Air is a little like my brain."

Also:
"If you work with a jackhammer during an earthquake, stop, otherwise you are working for nothing."
"According to statistics, one person out of five is disturbed. If there are four people around you who seem normal, that's not good."
"If you phone a psychic and she doesn't answer the phone before it rings, hang up."
"In the year 3,000, people are going to speak with sound waves. Don't think I'm crazy, the whales do it. Dolphins too."
"A cow eats three acres. With three acres I could make two thousand kilos of rice. With three acres I could feed Avignon!"
"A cookie has no soul, it's just a cookie. But before it was milk and eggs. And in eggs there's the potential for life."
"I'm fast, why? Because I eat vegetables."
"Obviously I've taken drugs."

paizuri-san (davidcorp), Friday, 9 February 2007 15:49 (eighteen years ago)

Hsi wikipedia page is pretty great actually.

"Van Damme was first seen on screen in the French-made Rue Barbare, released in 1984, followed in the same year with Monaco Forever, where he was credited as 'Gay Karate Man'[6]."

paizuri-san (davidcorp), Friday, 9 February 2007 15:51 (eighteen years ago)

http://growabrain.typepad.com/photos/uncategorized/steven_wright_jokes.gif

senator second p. newcastle (a_p), Friday, 9 February 2007 15:51 (eighteen years ago)

van damme otm

whatever i do, it's right (teenagequiet), Friday, 9 February 2007 15:51 (eighteen years ago)

he banged kylie during streetfighter filming

vita susicivus (blueski), Friday, 9 February 2007 15:51 (eighteen years ago)

Brilliant. This is even better than Segal.

speak with sound waves

Are we not doing this already?!

Kv_nol (Kv_nol), Friday, 9 February 2007 15:52 (eighteen years ago)

From Chuck Zito's page:

Just before filming for Oz started, Zito received additional publicity when he knocked out Jean Claude Van Damme with one punch at the New York City strip club Scores, after the actor and martial artist stated that "Chuck Zito has no heart."

paizuri-san (davidcorp), Friday, 9 February 2007 15:52 (eighteen years ago)

http://youtube.com/watch?v=NHJ0v4RPfEs

jhoshea (scoopsnoodle), Friday, 9 February 2007 15:53 (eighteen years ago)

Air is a little like my brain

this is the best thing anyone has ever said anywhere

vita susicivus (blueski), Friday, 9 February 2007 15:55 (eighteen years ago)

"A cookie has no soul, it's just a cookie. But before it was milk and eggs. And in eggs there's the potential for life."

ok wow wtf

Allyzay doesnt get into the monkeys or vindications (allyzay), Friday, 9 February 2007 15:55 (eighteen years ago)

Bloodsport 4ever

A cookie has no soul, it's just a cookie (Jordan), Friday, 9 February 2007 15:57 (eighteen years ago)

Brilliant. This is even better than Segal.

Exactly my thought! The true Zen master.

Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 9 February 2007 15:59 (eighteen years ago)

everyone has their favourite

"According to statistics, one person out of five is disturbed. If there are four people around you who seem normal, that's not good."

RJG (RJG), Friday, 9 February 2007 16:03 (eighteen years ago)

Haha - Van Damme's philosophical musings have been sacred in French speakinhg countries for a while. There have also been some classy euro-dance remixes with choice quotes.

is anyone anticipating the new Baaderonixx? (baaderonixx), Friday, 9 February 2007 16:06 (eighteen years ago)

http://www.islandvideo.net/martial_arts/Martial%20Arts%20Resources/VanDamme_6.jpg
"A cow eats three acres. With three acres I could make two thousand kilos of rice. With three acres I could feed Avignon!"

blotter Budweiser Hackeysadk (nickalicious), Friday, 9 February 2007 16:08 (eighteen years ago)

French speaking ILXorz can have a cosy little Friday evening going through this website (mp3s included): http://www4.tz-technologie.com/

is anyone anticipating the new Baaderonixx? (baaderonixx), Friday, 9 February 2007 16:09 (eighteen years ago)

"L'eau c'est quelque chose de concret mais pas concret. Parce que l'eau... peut me nourrir, mais aussi l'eau...peut me porter. Parce que l'eau...a des lois magiques. L'eau peut tenir des cargos dans la mer, des milliers de tonnes d'acier... C'est quelque chose qui a beaucoup de dimensions l'eau".

is anyone anticipating the new Baaderonixx? (baaderonixx), Friday, 9 February 2007 16:10 (eighteen years ago)

This might also be my fave:
A cookie has no soul, it's just a cookie. But before it was milk and eggs. And in eggs there's the potential for life


Thanks for the links Baaderonix!

paizuri-san (davidcorp), Friday, 9 February 2007 16:10 (eighteen years ago)

"... With three acres I could feed Avignon!"

If you say so J-C!

Tom D. (Dada), Friday, 9 February 2007 16:11 (eighteen years ago)

There have also been some classy euro-dance remixes with choice quotes.

YSI!!!!!!

jhoshea (scoopsnoodle), Friday, 9 February 2007 16:11 (eighteen years ago)

check the mp3 section of that site

is anyone anticipating the new Baaderonixx? (baaderonixx), Friday, 9 February 2007 16:14 (eighteen years ago)

My favorite but I can't find them in English:

Jean-Claude et l'intérieur de lui-même aware : "Tu regardes à l'intérieur de toi et tu deviens aware of your own body !"

***

Jean-Claude et les plantes aware : "Les plantes par exemple, qui n'ont pas de mains, et pas d'oreilles, elles sentent les choses, les vibrations, elles sont plus aware que les autres species."

***

Jean-Claude et les femmes aware : "Une femme qui est enceinte, par exemple, elle est aware dès qu'elle attend un enfant..."

***

Jean-Claude et les replicants aware : "Un replicant quand il naît, il est physically formé comme un gars de 40 ans, mais son brain... comment on dit ? son computer brain ? son cerveau, il faut qu'il absorbe tout ce qu'il y a autour, qu'il voie les couleurs, qu'il touche comment sont les choses, il est aware..."

is anyone anticipating the new Baaderonixx? (baaderonixx), Friday, 9 February 2007 16:14 (eighteen years ago)

Please translate!

Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 9 February 2007 16:15 (eighteen years ago)

Jean-Claude et les cacahuètes : "J'adore les cacahuètes. Tu bois une bière et tu en as marre du goût. Alors, tu manges des cacahuètes. Les cacahuètes c'est doux et salé, fort et tendre, comme une femme. Manger des cacahuètes, it's a really strong feeling. Et après, tu as de nouveau envie de boire de la bière. Les cacahuètes, c'est le mouvement perpétuel à la portée de l'homme"

is anyone anticipating the new Baaderonixx? (baaderonixx), Friday, 9 February 2007 16:19 (eighteen years ago)

"replicant", starring JCVD (twice (to some degree)), was on, the other night

RJG (RJG), Friday, 9 February 2007 16:20 (eighteen years ago)

That last one:

JC and peanuts: "I love peanuts. You drink a beer and get fed up with its taste. Then, you eat peanuts. Peanuts are soft and salty, strong and tender, just like a woman. Eating peanuts, "it's a really strong feeling". And then, you want another beer. Peanuts are the perpetual movement at man's reach."

is anyone anticipating the new Baaderonixx? (baaderonixx), Friday, 9 February 2007 16:21 (eighteen years ago)

The man's a genius

Tom D. (Dada), Friday, 9 February 2007 16:22 (eighteen years ago)

*astounded*

Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 9 February 2007 16:22 (eighteen years ago)

Machine translation of the previous three:

Jean-Claude and the interior of itself aware: "You look at inside you
and you become aware of your own body!"

***

Jean-Claude and plants aware: "The plants for example, which do not
have hands, and not ears, they smell of the things, the vibrations,
they are more aware than the others species."

***

Jean-Claude and women aware: "Woman who is pregnant, for example, she
is aware as soon as she awaits a child…"

***

Jean-Claude and replicants aware: "Replicant when it is born, it
physically is formed as a 40-year-old boy, but a his BRAIN… how one
said? its BRAIN computer? its brain, it must absorb all there is
around, that it sees the colours, that it affects how things are, it
is aware… "

is anyone anticipating the new Baaderonixx? (baaderonixx), Friday, 9 February 2007 16:22 (eighteen years ago)

Jean-Claude plus machine translation = a wonderful new world.

Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 9 February 2007 16:23 (eighteen years ago)

A lot of this is in English in the original French text.

is anyone anticipating the new Baaderonixx? (baaderonixx), Friday, 9 February 2007 16:24 (eighteen years ago)

Merveilleux Jean-Claude.
There's also a great one :
JC : 1+1= ?
intervieuwer : 2 ?
JC : no, 1...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XfTBD3xL6zs


AleXTC (AleXTC), Friday, 9 February 2007 16:34 (eighteen years ago)

after reading this i'm positive in 25 years all american school children will know jean claude van damme either because he was one of the greatest minds of his time or because he's the posterchild for what drug abuse can do to you.

chicago kevin (chicago kevin), Friday, 9 February 2007 16:37 (eighteen years ago)

How can the same man who said "Peanuts are the perpetual movement at man's reach, " then go on to say that cookies have no soul? What about peanut-butter cookies? Huh? Huh?

Beth Parker (Beth Parker), Friday, 9 February 2007 16:40 (eighteen years ago)

ok that vid is mindblowing without sound

geoff (gcannon), Friday, 9 February 2007 16:41 (eighteen years ago)

ok that last vid is mindblowing without sound

geoff (gcannon), Friday, 9 February 2007 16:41 (eighteen years ago)

quelle horreur

geoff (gcannon), Friday, 9 February 2007 16:41 (eighteen years ago)

It's funny because as Baaderonix said, there was a huge buzz around his "statements" a few years ago in France. Some people (including me) even thought it was all done on purpose by JCVD as a media plan...
now, most of these quotes are classics !

AleXTC (AleXTC), Friday, 9 February 2007 16:42 (eighteen years ago)

I think it's time for a revival!

is anyone anticipating the new Baaderonixx? (baaderonixx), Friday, 9 February 2007 16:43 (eighteen years ago)

I heard JCVD insists on his friends calling him JCVD

RJG (RJG), Friday, 9 February 2007 16:44 (eighteen years ago)

A little French documentary on the JCVD "phenomenon": http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IvCMqhtIlUg&mode=related&search=

is anyone anticipating the new Baaderonixx? (baaderonixx), Friday, 9 February 2007 16:45 (eighteen years ago)

WHERE IS THE DANCING GIF

geoff (gcannon), Friday, 9 February 2007 16:46 (eighteen years ago)

this one is here:

http://www.themovieblog.com/archives/dammedancing01.gif

RJG (RJG), Friday, 9 February 2007 16:47 (eighteen years ago)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6WrNErNxX1M&mode=related&search=

beware : that might break your brainz...

AleXTC (AleXTC), Friday, 9 February 2007 16:47 (eighteen years ago)

no, i absolutely refuse to watch van damme boner video again. you should put a better warning than "brain will break" on that.

Allyzay doesnt get into the monkeys or vindications (allyzay), Friday, 9 February 2007 16:48 (eighteen years ago)

that's not even the vandammedance gif i was thinking of

!

geoff (gcannon), Friday, 9 February 2007 16:49 (eighteen years ago)

still not as amazing as the cruiser

RJG (RJG), Friday, 9 February 2007 16:51 (eighteen years ago)

you can't deny he's got style...

AleXTC (AleXTC), Friday, 9 February 2007 16:52 (eighteen years ago)

http://vdridesagain.ytmnd.com/

geoff (gcannon), Friday, 9 February 2007 16:53 (eighteen years ago)

http://www.planetdan.net/pics/misc/dammedance.jpg

geoff (gcannon), Friday, 9 February 2007 16:55 (eighteen years ago)

that is my favorite gif on all of the internets

Allyzay rankin u boobage...!! (allyzay), Friday, 9 February 2007 16:56 (eighteen years ago)

That is so the way a man fascinated by air dances!!!!

blotter Budweiser Hackeysadk (nickalicious), Friday, 9 February 2007 16:59 (eighteen years ago)

BUH?

“Inside oneself, DEEP INSIDE, really inside, something of invincible which are called the SPIRIT, the spirit. One was built like that, one was made with the SPIRIT. Ca, it is the straight line of the body, one thinks us horizontal, 1h, 2h, 3h, 4 H, one is INSECURE, people are afraid of time. How old you are, 40 years? Then when I say that I will die in 45 years, ouai, I insane of the mouth of people, me! They did not include/understand, because time, the seconds between you and I are seconds but for the oxygen which is a matter less compressed than your human body; 1 sconde, they is 100 seconds and stone and the brick and wine storehouses not what, it is done of enormous compression. One needs Black & Decker. But you remove this pressure and you become vertical like the spirit. Does all fall, what remains in life? Made molecules of electricity because that moves. Then it y' has the molecules which is made arrows (one said that I spoke about film, I exuse!) and then the electricity which is made with finest of its layer of FEELING which is called COILS and my FEELING is: I know that you me listenings with attention. But it is hard to hear things as that when it speaks about apple and of the snake and ADAM and EVE but that they is pausibles beuacoup questions. BIG-BANG THEORY Of EINSTEIN, I MEAN, you put a mollécule that you create, that it does not have him, hein, it does not have the molecule, but us one has it, one wants to keep it, you see and him it has this energy which made the Big-bang and the universe grew and it is that the world, it is not complicated the life!” JC VanDamme

Lukewarm Watery G. Tornado; Less sick than before (The GZeus), Friday, 9 February 2007 17:00 (eighteen years ago)

I live pretty close to the gym where he became the man who he is now and which he subsequently bought.

is anyone anticipating the new Baaderonixx? (baaderonixx), Friday, 9 February 2007 17:03 (eighteen years ago)

OLHAAAAA!!!!

tokyo nursery school: afternoon session (rosemary), Friday, 9 February 2007 17:06 (eighteen years ago)

XPOST
Maybe you could hit the gym every now and then and become the next JCVD, hum ?

AleXTC (AleXTC), Friday, 9 February 2007 17:14 (eighteen years ago)

“Doesn't coke coke have merdique there than coke ok? does that stop the head, that you fout all in the air, hein, one does not know what one says, one does not know what one makes, ok? [...] Coke is not necessary to touch it is shit. I have to try me to beat it. One cannot beat it. Then it becomes, when it is known, it becomes a companion whom one does not touch. I am allergic to coke, it is very simple, and it is for that that I can speak now, I am in form, I am afraid of anybody, I am strong in the eyes, because I do not have coke you see? Good I speak a little quickly. It is not a problem not if I am fast. Chuis a guy who is fast, I am speed, why? I eat that vegetables. “JC Van Damme.

geoff (gcannon), Friday, 9 February 2007 17:20 (eighteen years ago)

“Water it is something of concrete but not concrete. Because water… can nourish me, but also water… can carry me. Because water… has magic laws. Water can hold of the cargo liners in the sea, of the thousands of tons of steel… It is something which has many dimensions water.” JC Vandamme

Lukewarm Watery G. Tornado; Less sick than before (The GZeus), Friday, 9 February 2007 17:21 (eighteen years ago)

ok ok one more and then i'll stop

“One is all homos. I will explain why. One is all homos. Y has the homesexuel, and y has the homo, has the homo there because one adores oneself. Me I always look at myself in the ice, why? To have a beautiful body. OK? Then me a body was given, and I try to respect it best than I can. Then I like my body; am I a homo?” JC Vandamme

geoff (gcannon), Friday, 9 February 2007 17:21 (eighteen years ago)

wow

latebloomer (latebloomer), Friday, 9 February 2007 19:24 (eighteen years ago)

"I like my body; am I a homo?" is my new favourite.

Johnney B English (stigoftdump), Friday, 9 February 2007 19:50 (eighteen years ago)

one year passes...

so great!

Jena, Wednesday, 6 August 2008 06:29 (seventeen years ago)

So true.

Ned Raggett, Thursday, 7 August 2008 15:58 (seventeen years ago)

three months pass...

So I admit to being curious about this film.

Ned Raggett, Monday, 10 November 2008 16:07 (seventeen years ago)

On being engaged with his movies: “I want to be involved in that nine-month process. It’s like making a baby. You make love, and it’s the full way to delivery. How can I be mentally pregnant with the film all the way?”

Ned Raggett, Monday, 10 November 2008 16:09 (seventeen years ago)

seeing it opening night! so amped.

national oracle BIG HOOS (BIG HOOS aka the steendriver), Monday, 10 November 2008 16:11 (seventeen years ago)

he banged kylie during streetfighter filming

― vita susicivus (blueski), Friday, 9 February 2007 15:51 (1 year ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

citation needed

Glans Christian Christian christian Christian Andersen (MPx4A), Monday, 10 November 2008 16:28 (seventeen years ago)

His next film, which bears the most un-Van Damme-ian title “Full Love,” would seem to offer full-on mental pregnancy: he serves as actor, writer, director and producer. He will only say that it is set in 1960s Louisiana and present-day Southeast Asia and that it will have “a controversial message.”

goole, Monday, 10 November 2008 16:42 (seventeen years ago)

The message: air is made of love

I wonder if birds - even dinosaur birds - were created in mid-air, (latebloomer), Monday, 10 November 2008 16:43 (seventeen years ago)

Rather unlovely.

Ned Raggett, Friday, 21 November 2008 23:48 (seventeen years ago)

I just read that in Newsweek last night! It was very creepy to come across unexpectedly.

jon /via/ chi 2.0, Friday, 21 November 2008 23:51 (seventeen years ago)

:( i was all set to see this and come away thinking he was cool

BIG HOOS enjoys a cold mindbeer (BIG HOOS aka the steendriver), Saturday, 22 November 2008 00:19 (seventeen years ago)

Hey Ned -- the search function is your friend.

:D

David R., Saturday, 22 November 2008 00:46 (seventeen years ago)

Hooray!

Ned Raggett, Saturday, 22 November 2008 01:43 (seventeen years ago)

speaking as a woman i'm not sure i really understand the reaction here.

the schef (adam schefter ha ha), Saturday, 22 November 2008 21:08 (seventeen years ago)

I'm 22.
Oh, f---. That is very young.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^ creepiest part

BIG HOOS enjoys a cold mindbeer (BIG HOOS aka the steendriver), Saturday, 22 November 2008 23:10 (seventeen years ago)

I really opened myself up in "JCVD." I peeled back the skin of the fruit, cut the pulp and then took that very hard seed. In this film I cut that hard seed, and inside that seed was a kind of liquid cream substance of the man I am, or the woman you are.

Matt #2, Sunday, 23 November 2008 00:49 (seventeen years ago)

^^if that don't make you mentally pregnant I don't know what will

sonderangerbot, Sunday, 23 November 2008 01:02 (seventeen years ago)

eight months pass...

http://i43.photobucket.com/albums/e377/paulatraides/Damme.gif

omar little, Friday, 7 August 2009 23:48 (sixteen years ago)

The best 7 minutes of JCVD:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p0k61WJXizw

Derelict, Saturday, 8 August 2009 00:17 (sixteen years ago)

"It's so stupid to kill people. They're so beautiful."

Milton Parker, Saturday, 8 August 2009 00:27 (sixteen years ago)

I am and forever will be a Cyborg man.

Nate Carson, Saturday, 8 August 2009 02:53 (sixteen years ago)

I am having a fucking heart attack over that gif

°⌉ 3⊥∀N (╓abies), Sunday, 9 August 2009 11:32 (sixteen years ago)

hahaha that gif

Great Scott! It's Molecular Man. (Ste), Sunday, 9 August 2009 18:48 (sixteen years ago)

one month passes...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AO2gBezgKrE

abanana, Wednesday, 9 September 2009 10:49 (sixteen years ago)

xD

wilter, Wednesday, 9 September 2009 11:02 (sixteen years ago)

http://i27.tinypic.com/332uir6.jpg

^^^^^^^

wilter, Wednesday, 9 September 2009 11:03 (sixteen years ago)

http://new.imagebay.com/mediaobjects/shirty/1.jpg

wilter, Wednesday, 9 September 2009 11:20 (sixteen years ago)

three months pass...

RIP, greatest gif on the internet.

retrovaporized nebulizer (╓abies), Wednesday, 6 January 2010 16:56 (fifteen years ago)

Nevermind, that was the easiest GIS ever
http://media.photobucket.com/image/bloodsport%20gif/TildaWildabub777/bloodsport.gif

retrovaporized nebulizer (╓abies), Wednesday, 6 January 2010 17:08 (fifteen years ago)

Hold on that didn't...
http://www.ncplus.net/~eli/images/bloodsport.gif

retrovaporized nebulizer (╓abies), Wednesday, 6 January 2010 17:09 (fifteen years ago)

seven years pass...

http://www.hln.be/hln/nl/957/Binnenland/article/detail/3180789/2017/06/12/Sp-a-er-volledig-door-het-lint-Zwijg-gij-bruine-rakker-Zwijg.dhtml

Van Damme, leader of the Socialist Party in the Brussels Parliament, last Friday in the Council of the Flemish Community severely failed against Vlaams Belanger Dominiek Lootens-Stael.
During a heated discussion about problems with education in Brussels he called Lootens-Stael commented: "Shut up, you black rascal Shut up, you rascal brown Shut up!" The images on YouTube.

The VB'er Van Damme would have interrupted several times. Van Damme was "fed up" and flipped while shocked the rest of the politicians present, but also stoically responded to the cries and screams. "If you do not stop you, dear friend, find another craft," sneered Lootens-Stael.

Dean of the University (Latham Green), Monday, 12 June 2017 19:19 (eight years ago)


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