What's the habit/trait that YOU have that most drives your partner/boyfriend/girlfriend/husband/wife/ totally NUTS!

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Here's the thing : ASK them first just to check, before posting. Don't assume that you know what it is!

― Dr.C, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 12:56 (eighteen years ago)

I'm not going to open up that can o'worms! What if he secretly hates me, and has been waiting for JUST THIS OPPORTUNITY to let it all come spilling out? eh? eh?

― C J, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 12:59 (eighteen years ago)

I'm purrfeekt! How dare you suggest there's something that might piss him off! ;-)

― nathalie, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 13:03 (eighteen years ago)

Oh go on!

― Dr.C, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 13:03 (eighteen years ago)

That was a x-post to CJ.

Nath - yes, of course you're perfect. Or are you?

― Dr.C, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 13:04 (eighteen years ago)

I keep forgetting stuff.

― Pashmina, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 13:08 (eighteen years ago)

xpost Hardly. Unless you call my gazillion flaws as perfections. ;-)

― nathalie, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 13:09 (eighteen years ago)

oh I know what it is, see other thread about last night's fight. I'm messy! I try, I really do. And when things are pointed out to me that I've overlooked I will do them and make an effort to stay on top of it the future. But I'm comfortable with a certain level of slovenliness that my partner isn't. I keep telling him this is never going to change. I'm never going to notice and be bothered by the same things he is. He just has to point them out to me and I'll try to keep up.

― Ms Misery, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 13:29 (eighteen years ago)

There is no way he would ever tell me. He is too much of a gentleman.

― accentmonkey, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 13:38 (eighteen years ago)

I will post what I THINK it is and then check with him later, Mr & Mrs style: leaving clothes on the bathroom floor.

― Archel, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 13:42 (eighteen years ago)

Just my general spacey-ness. Like forgetting to put the cap or lid back on things after I've used them, or losing my atm card.

― Nicole, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 13:51 (eighteen years ago)

Ooh that's a good idea - post what you think it is and then check.

She'll say one of these about me :

1) Tuning out of conversations, or making the minimum effort to keep them going, when I am busy or have something on my mind.
2) Getting attached to certain items of clothing that are clearly worn out and beyond scruffy.
3) Not bothering to ring people back - 'oh they'll ring again if it's important'.

We'll see.

― Dr.C, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 13:53 (eighteen years ago)

yeah also I'm a packrat and a bit of a know-it-all

― Ms Misery, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 13:54 (eighteen years ago)

She will be back shortly (unless she's lost track of time!) so I will check.

― Dr.C, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 13:56 (eighteen years ago)

I think he would say that he's most irritated by the way I casually suggest I'd like him to do some bit of DIY around the house, but that I don't realise how much work is involved. He's very good at practical stuff, but does tend to lose his temper while doing it if he has an audience (I learned long ago to get out of the house and leave him to it, he seems to behave much more calmly that way). If I stay while he does whatever task I have requested, I am subjected to a tirade of YOU HAVE NO IDEA, DO YOU? YOU JUST THINK EVERYTHING IS SO SIMPLE!!! It was like that when I wanted some carpeting replaced with wooden flooring, which he did admirably, except the wooden flooring was thicker than the original carpet so now the door had to be taken off the hinges and planed a bit. This was apparently All My Fault.

Secretly I think he quite enjoys these performances though. It's like he's a caveman beating his chest or something.

― C J, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 14:01 (eighteen years ago)

My wooden floor (as featured in the what does yr house look like thread, wherever that's gone) was a total world of pain and anguish to put down, so I sympathise with Mr. Unruly.

― Dr.C, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 14:17 (eighteen years ago)

I lived through that world of pain and anguish when Mr Unruly did our floor. Every snarling, tool-throwing minute of it.

It's lucky I've got a sense of humour.

― C J, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 14:19 (eighteen years ago)

Staying up too late.

― Tracer Hand, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 14:54 (eighteen years ago)

yeah, totally staying up tp late, or particularly getting up after i've gone to bed and waking her.

i work evening shifts, what am i gonna do?

― darraghmac, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 15:06 (eighteen years ago)

Indeciveness. Totally. Or perhaps hairs in the sink. No, indeciveness.

― rumpie, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 15:10 (eighteen years ago)

ha, fuck, I do loads of these (annoying-partner) things. I'm like the worst wife in the world!

― ailsa, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 15:10 (eighteen years ago)

Scott says, "I don't want to go on there and say stuff I don't like about you. You're fine, I love you." but I know there are more than a couple of things: clothes on the bathroom floor, leaving lids loose on the peanut butter, general messiness...

― Maria :D, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 15:26 (eighteen years ago)

argh, why do neat freaks hate on the messy so much?? It's not a statement about our ethics. . .

― Ms Misery, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 15:28 (eighteen years ago)

Don't tell the women of my family, I swear to god they all think clutter is at least sightly immoral and dirt is a venal sin.

― Laurel, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 15:29 (eighteen years ago)

if you were to ask my most recent exes i would probably guess their biggest problem with me is that i'm still drawing breath.

― chicago kevin, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 15:31 (eighteen years ago)

xpost, I think all neat freaks think that! hatin' bastards.

― Ms Misery, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 15:33 (eighteen years ago)

Scott is no neat freak, but I beat him in the Slob Awards.

― Maria :D, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 15:39 (eighteen years ago)

argh, why do neat freaks hate on the messy so much??

cause you're messing up our clean little universe. that said, i've turned *slobbier* as well due to my husband. :-)

― nathalie, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 15:40 (eighteen years ago)

It's lucky I've got a sense of humour.

He, surely, is a better way of referring to him, no?

― Michael White, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 15:41 (eighteen years ago)

1) hatin' bastard neat freak
2) I-sit-in-judgement know-it-all-ness
3) passenger panic (sharp intakes of breath to anguished screams of SLOWDOWN!!!) when he drives

I don't know which he'd say is worst. Probably 2.

― Jaq, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 15:43 (eighteen years ago)

I talk with the I-am-completely-knowledgable-on-this-subject voice even when there's a good chance I-am-completely-making-it-up

― .stet., Tuesday, 27 February 2007 15:50 (eighteen years ago)

I often imagine worst-case scenarios and expect him to play the imagine doom and gloom game with me - like what if I had a brain tumor or what if the house burned down. He likes to live in the here and now, not some imagined scary future.

― Maria :D, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 15:53 (eighteen years ago)

reading the last four or five posts, i think we are getting a clear view of ILX if it was a real person.

― darraghmac, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 15:54 (eighteen years ago)

reading the last four or five posts, i think we are getting a clear view of ILX if it was a real person.

What kind of hairdo do we have?

― Maria :D, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 15:55 (eighteen years ago)

male- short, receding. i'm not gonna lie, there's a good possibility of lice

female- lank and indie unwashed. not natural colour. any natural colour.

― darraghmac, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 15:58 (eighteen years ago)

Oh my god, Maria! I too have those WCScenarios but only in my head. I sit there, knitting, thinking about the future going all black. He asks me what's up and I let him know:"Having a little panic attack here. Nevermind!"

I think one of my bad traits is having others (read parents) change my mind. I don't see this as a bad trait, but he sees this as not being able to stand up to parents/people, I think. I don't know, I think we're both a little right?

― nathalie, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 15:58 (eighteen years ago)

Man, that's harsh.

― C J, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 15:58 (eighteen years ago)

I am cheap. And I can never get to the point in a story.

― teeny, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 16:11 (eighteen years ago)

[i]female- lank and indie unwashed. not natural colour. any natural colour.[/]

hey! I'll have you know I have very full, clean hair and recoil from anything "indie".

― Ms Misery, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 16:13 (eighteen years ago)

Apart from your specs.

― Mark C, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 16:16 (eighteen years ago)

:(

actually G. said they look like they belong on "a crazy, old, black woman" so I think definition of indie varies.

― Ms Misery, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 16:16 (eighteen years ago)

I like yr specs btw! I suspect, though, that suicide girls do too.

― Mark C, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 16:17 (eighteen years ago)

She's back, we have spoken.

Apparently my worst habit is that when we're watching TV or a film, I keep saying things like 'oh look that's [insert name of actor] wasn't he/she in [insert name of film/programme]'? I do this even at crucial moments in the plot.

It's a fair cop - I do this ALL the time.

― Dr.C, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 16:19 (eighteen years ago)

It's not too bad though is it? I'm quite surprised she didn't pick anything worse.

― Dr.C, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 16:20 (eighteen years ago)

haha, one of my worst habits, for any poor soul who's around me, is I talk incessantly while watching tv. I comment, I talk to the characters, I ask questions (that I don't expect to be answered.) I'm sure I'm totally annoying. Once an old friend said "I bet when S. goes to see Spike Lee films black people tell her to be quiet." It was the best put-down ever.

(wow, people around me sound kind of racist don't they? neither G or my friend are at all racist, just I don't know, Southern? cultural thing. . .)

― Ms Misery, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 16:24 (eighteen years ago)

Yeah, but this thread isn't for the deal-breaker stuff, is it. It's for the things you love to hate but have secretly resolved will never actually come between you. If she had a problem with your shooting heroin in front of the children, for instance, she prob wouldn't be like "since you mention it, Dr C, it drives me fucking batty when you cook up with Tommy's friends over; isn't that why we had to clean out the garage, so you could have a workshop?"

― Laurel, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 16:24 (eighteen years ago)

Yeah, you're right. I wait till the kids are in bed before I shoot up anyway.

― Dr.C, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 16:26 (eighteen years ago)

You mean you don't buy the stuff from them, like any other self-respecting parent does?

― C J, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 16:27 (eighteen years ago)

I talk incessantly while watching tv

oh ouch, I do this a lot, which is probably why we don't go out to many movies (especially scary ones where I'm all "oh, don't go in THERE! Can't you HEAR the MUSIC!!!")

― Jaq, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 16:32 (eighteen years ago)

x-post - only when they bring me the GOOD stuff.

― Dr.C, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 16:34 (eighteen years ago)

I love having a DVR. We can pause at any given moment to ascertain where we know actor X from or comment on how stupid the latest plot twist is or replay lines that we missed or that we found funny (I think we first did this with 'Arrested Development's throwaway lines), or comment on the hair/costumes/make-up/lighting/delusions of thespian adequacy, etc, at will.

― Michael White, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 16:36 (eighteen years ago)

The inability to initiate anything without being asked, apparently.

― Noodle Vague, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 16:41 (eighteen years ago)

I imagine my complete inability to let go of things can be pretty annoying--if I get really into something, I have a hard time dropping back into the real world (mixing comes to mind).

― tissp, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 16:44 (eighteen years ago)

Oh, and what Ailsa said from the other thread:

Oh God, shopping!

Also, going out for a meal.

Me: "right, it's Friday, I've just been paid, shall we go out, my treat, where do you fancy?"
Him: "oh, I don't know, what do you fancy?"
Me: "you choose. X restaurant? Y restaurant? The pub? A Chinese? A curry?"
Him: "yeah, any of them, whatever you fancy"
Me: "no, it's up to you"

I am very bad at doing this

― tissp, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 16:47 (eighteen years ago)

(note to self: do not marry ailsa)

― tissp, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 16:47 (eighteen years ago)

As per the other thread, my driving habits piss off the girl more than anything else.

Also, stet OTM on the completely-knowledgable-about-the-subject voice. When I use it she disagrees with me even when she knows I'm right just because she hates it so much.

― max, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 16:48 (eighteen years ago)

haha tissp, decisiveness is a strong trait in neither myself nor the girl and yet it's somehow something that gets us into fights every time we want to go out to dinner.

― max, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 16:51 (eighteen years ago)

Yes, the situation is probably exacerbated somewhat by the fact neither me nor her are the most decisive people!

― tissp, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 16:52 (eighteen years ago)

keep a jar with all the names of places you frequent on slips of paper and then when it's time to go, draw one out. No worries if it's a bad choice, it was the jar's fault!

― Ms Misery, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 16:55 (eighteen years ago)

I too hate that voice.

I honestly have so many things wrong with me that I think Mister M would have a hard time picking one to be top of the list. There are at least ten things listed here that I do, including nagging him about his intake of beer/sweets (when I'm fatter and unhealthier than him!), talking during a telly programme I'm not interested in but growling at anyone who talks during a programme I am interested in, and so on and so on.

(Off-topic, I had the most annoying telly experience while trying to watch that David Tennant thing the other night. My housemate, right at the very start when DT was walking around in his dressing gown, said "what's wrong with him?" and when other housemate suggested she watch the programme and find out, she sulked the whole rest of the night. Gah)

― accentmonkey, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 16:56 (eighteen years ago)

Indecisive people shouldn't be allowed to mate, or the human race will surely trail off sort of aimlessly into an evolutionary standstill.

― Laurel, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 16:57 (eighteen years ago)

No, the indecisive families will starve to death after never being able to choose a restaurant.

― max, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 17:05 (eighteen years ago)

Oh! So basically they're taking themselves out of the gene pool, that's not so bad.

― Laurel, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 17:05 (eighteen years ago)

Natural selection, innit.

― G00blar, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 17:06 (eighteen years ago)

talking during a telly programme I'm not interested in but growling at anyone who talks during a programme I am interested in

Oh, I was trying to find the thread where we were all ranting about people who do that, but I couldn't. I can't even remember if it was here or the sandbox.

― ailsa, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 17:08 (eighteen years ago)

It's just, there are certain programmes it's okay to talk over. Live Big Brother, for one thing, or the mid-week Coronation Street, or any of EastEnders. But talking during a Tony Marchant film starring David Tennant or an episode of Lost is NOT ACCEPTABLE.

― accentmonkey, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 17:10 (eighteen years ago)

i am a terrible car passenger with a big tendency to mouth off about "oh what about that parking spot, how did you miss that? oh good we missed our turn AGAIN great!!" and a whole lot of "watch the road already" and basically just a lot of freaking out to where i'll get to the point of being like, "let's just go home, ok? i'm sorry for my shitty idea to leave the house! i don't want to go out anymore!" in fact, getting into the car together basically guarantees a row and a big "ok i promise i won't freak out on the drive home" which of course is a promise that i rarely keep.

i didn't ask him but i'm sure he'd agree it's tremendously irritating.

― the schef (adam schefter ha ha), Tuesday, 27 February 2007 17:10 (eighteen years ago)

talking during a telly programme I'm not interested in but growling at anyone who talks during a programme I am interested in

Oh, I was trying to find the thread where we were all ranting about people who do that, but I couldn't. I can't even remember if it was here or the sandbox.

It was the LOST thread, I believe. Either here or the sandbox.

I honestly have so many things wrong with me that I think Mister M would have a hard time picking one to be top of the list.
Me too. I have a million annoying traits, and Donald, more times than not, is merely amused by them. I do not deserve him. Sometimes when I wake up in the middle of the night I look over at him and am struck with disbelief that I snagged him. Me, the wallflower of all time. And a bitch, besides.

― Beth Parker, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 17:24 (eighteen years ago)

accentmonkey, talking over L O S T (or anything else from Big Brother to Life on Mars and all inbetween) is acceptable in my house when I do it and not at all when he does it because, and this is the crucial difference between me and him, I know when it's OK to talk over something and he doesn't.

― ailsa, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 17:25 (eighteen years ago)

I talk with the I-am-completely-knowledgable-on-this-subject voice even when there's a good chance I-am-completely-making-it-up

OH LOLZ this is one of my biggest problems, in or out of a relationship

― kenan, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 17:28 (eighteen years ago)

That's not a problem, it's an essential skill for middle management

― Tracer Hand, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 17:30 (eighteen years ago)

Me: "right, it's Friday, I've just been paid, shall we go out, my treat, where do you fancy?"
Him: "oh, I don't know, what do you fancy?"
Me: "you choose. X restaurant? Y restaurant? The pub? A Chinese? A curry?"
Him: "yeah, any of them, whatever you fancy"
Me: "no, it's up to you"

I'm pretty sure exchanges like these account for at least 50% of the conversation time I have with my girlfriend

― peter in montreal, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 17:31 (eighteen years ago)

yeah, it does go over much better at work than elsewhere

― kenan, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 17:31 (eighteen years ago)

I know when it's OK to talk over something and he doesn't.

Exactly. God, if only more people could see this.

― accentmonkey, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 18:20 (eighteen years ago)

Years ago (perhaps when high) I was convinced that I was going to somehow get the rights to create a Magic 8 Ball (tm) that says what to eat for dinner (Get Chinese Take-Out, Pizza, Heat Up Leftovers, etc.). This was years before other novelty eightballs made their appearance in urban outfitters.

― Maria :D, Wednesday, 28 February 2007 03:08 (eighteen years ago)

two years pass...

misread the thread title as "what's the habitrail that YOU have" ... sigh

― I ♠ my display name (sarahel), Monday, 28 September 2009 00:54 (sixteen years ago)

When my wife and I are discussing some or other subject of importance, where it is important that we understand one another, I am in the habit of repeating what my wife has just said and explaining what part of it I do not understand and why it does not make sense to me.

This drives her nuts, since I am always supposed to understand everything she says, no matter if her words or syntax are confusing. Rather, I am supposed to supplement my imperfect understanding through observing her tone of voice and body language, which she deems more than enough to make up for any deficiency in her precise use of English.

This, in turn, drives me nuts. Because she will refuse to clarify what she means, asserting that I am just playing semantic games and, once again, I should already know what she meant and so why should she repeat herself?

― Aimless, Monday, 28 September 2009 01:40 (sixteen years ago)

I interrupt TV or yardwork or podcast-listening to ask inane questions. Because things pop into my head that seem important to ask but then once I've actually asked, and he gives me that expectant/bored/fake interested expression then I realize I'm in the spotlight and then I get embarrassed and I say, 'oh don't worry'...but of course by then he's stopped whatever he's doing so now he wants to know...and then when he gets me to say it, it's a total nonevent and I know that it's maddening.

also I get really really OCD about certain bands, and then like a 5 year old who's really into ZOMG DINOSAURS that's all I can talk about for days and weeks on end.... and that's the only thing I listen to in the car.... and at home... I've seen times where he's on the verge of screaming GAH SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP! But he doesn't. Which is why I love him :)

― VegemiteGrrrl, Monday, 28 September 2009 01:58 (sixteen years ago)

I talk to myself all the time :(

― Dearth Disco (Trayce), Monday, 28 September 2009 02:01 (sixteen years ago)

Oh and, smoking, probably.

― Dearth Disco (Trayce), Monday, 28 September 2009 02:01 (sixteen years ago)

also this (on the same Sharon talks about inane things kick): We were driving home from work, and just apropos of nothing I started telling him about a hotdog I had for lunch that had coleslaw on it. He's silent. So I say gaily 'That's nice Sharon, sounds good.' Passive-aggressively of course. And then in his hilarious Homer Simpson-high-pitched-sarcastic-voice he says, quite loudly, "REEEEEEEALLLLY? COOOOOOOLESLAW? ON A HOOOOOT-DOG? THAT'S AAAAA-MAAAAAAZING!!! I CAN'T BEEELIEEEEEVE ANYONE WOULD PUT COLESLAW ON A HOT DOG!!!" And I laughed hysterically, and then told him I think I liked it better before when he didn't say anything.

― VegemiteGrrrl, Monday, 28 September 2009 02:03 (sixteen years ago)

besides my inability to consistently read his mind, probably the way I will say, "I need to do (blank)" and then not do it immediately, or even at the next available opportunity.

argument we had last night involving my inability to read his mind, he was trying to come up with the name of a movie to recommend to a friend:

him: you know, the one with the eyeball lady?
me: huh?
him: the eyeball lady, where they wall off Ireland?
me: wall off Ireland?
him: c'mon work with me, here. You know the one I'm talking about.
me: Doomsday? They wall off Northern England and Scotland. Ireland is a separate island.
him: (walks off in a huff)

― I ♠ my display name (sarahel), Monday, 28 September 2009 02:10 (sixteen years ago)

-let my hair grow too long
-tune out of convos/interrupt convos
-enthusiastically talk shit about 60s&70s music that she does not care baout
-swearing in public.

― wilter, Monday, 28 September 2009 02:20 (sixteen years ago)

"Oh come on, we were just talking about that a couple of days ago!"

― Niles Caulder, Monday, 28 September 2009 03:38 (sixteen years ago)

Batman

― Niles Caulder, Monday, 28 September 2009 03:38 (sixteen years ago)

consistently ask her what's wrong with ther when there's nothing wrong with her, until there's something wrong with her, and it's me.

― What are the benefits of dating a younger guy, better erections? (darraghmac), Monday, 28 September 2009 08:50 (sixteen years ago)

^^^oh, yes.

― Ned Trifle II, Monday, 28 September 2009 09:55 (sixteen years ago)

Also my constant demands for head.

― Ned Trifle II, Monday, 28 September 2009 09:56 (sixteen years ago)

cum 2 quik.

― denim nutsack (Whitey on the Moon), Tuesday, 29 September 2009 00:36 (sixteen years ago)

Bravehart? The Dark Crystal?

― Mr. Que, Tuesday, 29 September 2009 00:37 (sixteen years ago)

It was Doomsday. I was being a bit condescending with the gratuitous geography lesson.

― I ♠ my display name (sarahel), Tuesday, 29 September 2009 00:39 (sixteen years ago)

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