ROGER EBERT HATES ROLLERBALL!

god i saw leaving las vegas again on tv recently, what a turd.

-Russ Meyer

Yeah, I've noticed that he refuses to give anything with Angelina Jolie or Jennifer Lopez a bad review.

Yes, I have seen both "Tomb Raider" films.

Have you seen that new one with Ethan Hawke in it? Maybe that should be the test, because it looks horrid.

x-post

yuck

That's fair enough, I guess. There's no point in hoping that there's many truly overlooked films in that format, either. (Introducing Jaccov Jaccovi's The Chaperone... in 70mm!!!)

He probably hates all sports!!!!

OH SNAP!

sports that involve physical activity.

because he's chubby, see?

It's kinda funny.

Well, DUH! It's just that we all want an excuse to mock Roger Ebert.

I watched The Shadow the other day and was kind of shocked at just how cheap and campy it is, way more than I even remembered. Ebert probably defended it in the same way he did with Beowulf.

Kevin Smith should stop making movies and just replace Ebert on the show. They're both fat sci-fi geeks who can make a half-decent barb and are prone to overpraising mawkish crap.

uh

what we hate is what we hate about ourselves

ebert would probably (in a written review) praise baby's day out by saying something like "This is a story about parenting--about how the most painful thing about it can be learning when to let go. To let Baby have his day out."

ha!

what we hate is what we hate about ourselves

i am not nor have ever been a sci-fi geek, though I once did share their kinship for the ouvre of Cameron Crowe.

'I would love to have been a fly on the wall during the production of Baby's Day Out...'

"Do you remember your first Day Out? Mine was in Paris, studying there in 1972. I would spend my days at tiny Left Bank cinemas--admiring the French appreciation for the Golden Age of American cinema, and, of course, the women, who seemed as foreign to me as an exotic alien species. My first Day Out was on a rainy January afternoon in St-Germain-des-Près, after a screening of Howard Hawks' great 'Red River.'"

"It's not what entails this Baby's Day Out that makes it so enticing -- it's how it's about it. "Slow down, kid, before you hurt yourself!" says one of the crooks in this film, and it's advice even grown-ups like us could stand to appreciate."

"And so I've come to the end of this review without talking much about the movie. That's just as well. To really appreciate A Baby's Day Out, one must go beyond the margins of a newspaper or the frame of a computer."

"If the action is inspired by cartoons, the three kidnappers are inspired by the Three Stooges. They're not really evil, of course, simply stupid and incompetent, as they allow the kid to crawl out of captivity and then somehow can't recapture him even though he's usually in sight."

is that the movie about babies that are geniuses?

no, that's Brilliant Babies

it's the post-home alone john hughes movie, right?

His actual review of Baby's Day Out in full (slocki just quoted it)

http://rogerebert.suntimes.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/19940701/REVIEWS/407010301/1023

One of the worst sequences in "Baby's Day Out" involves Mantegna hiding the kid under a coat on his lap, while two cops question him. Baby Bink finds Mantegna's lighter, snaps it on, and sets his crotch on fire. The hidden fire lasts forever, it seems, while Mantegna's face tries to mask the pain. Then the cops leave, Mantegna leaps up, his pants burst into flame, and one of his pals saves him by stamping out the fire - grinding his heel into the burning crotch, of course. The sequence was agonizing, but I didn't think it was funny.

one of the few scenes in the film I even remember

i wanted to see if anyone would notice

Baby's Day Out stars a remarkable infant who keeps his composure in the center of chaos. Other child actors might mug to get a point across, but this Baby remains safe, observant and collected. To see him on screen, surrounded by such a glorious mess, is the essence of filmgoing.

I'll pretty much watch any shitty comedy where a successful character actor has their crotch pulverized, Chazz P in Little Man is a similar example.

Donal Logue has said that the closest he ever came to quitting acting was when he did a 3 Ninjas movie and the director's translator said his reaction to a kick to the groin wasn't belabored enough. "Not OW! Go OWOWOWOWOWOWOW!"

the idea of a world without the tao of steve is just... i dont want to think about it.

he was good in your precious zodiac

Juno is a film of such transcendent miracles that I half-expected the title character's child to pop out and perform the sort of majestic feats witnessed in Baby's Day Out.

I vaguely remember Siskel and Ebert's bitter internecine war over the merits of Cop and a Half.

What was it about kids' movies that got them going? I remember that one of the biggest fights I've ever seen them get into was over Alaska.

Kevin Smith should stop making movies and just replace Ebert on the show. They're both fat sci-fi geeks who can make a half-decent barb and are prone to overpraising mawkish crap.

he was good in your precious zodiac

-- da croupier, Friday, December 28, 2007 4:01 PM (5 hours ago) Bookmark Link

are you trying to sound like dr morbius?

kinda

Da. Morbier

i kind of like how the grumpy old man-ness has increased in ebert's reviews

The two meet at a club, when Norah needs Nick to pose as her boyfriend to make her ex-boyfriend jealous. He is named Tal (Jay Baruchel). My first Chicago girlfriend was named Tal, which is Hebrew for "the morning dew." I don't think he knows that.

Nick and Norah’s Infinite Playlist is a comedy about two people thrust together for one hilarious, sleepless night of adventure in a world of mix tapes, late-night living, and, live, loud music. Nick (Michael Cera) frequents New York's indie rock scene nursing a broken heart and a vague ability to play the bass. Norah (Kat Dennings) is questioning pretty much all of her assumptions about the world. Though they have nothing in common except for their taste in music, their chance encounter leads to an all-night quest to find a legendary band's secret show and ends up becoming the first date in a romance that could change both their lives.

(not Ebert, Sony Pictures synopsis)

I'm kind of irritated they stole the names from the Thin Man for this stupid looking movie.

technically they stole the name for the book

I'm sorta hoping that Cera will develop Powell-esque gravitas and wit, though.

(xpost)

"technically they stole the name for the book"

I don't understand what you are saying here.

names, not name

Nick and Norah's was a teen novel before it was a movie.

the movie is based on a novel

x-post

Oh I get it (I thought you were saying Hammett stole the names and I was wondering from where?)

i always wanna call it nick and nolte's infinite playlist

I'd totally see Nick Nolte's Infinite Playlist.

it is a one minute loop of painful deep-toned caterwauling

I fear that when the poor man kicks the bucket, this will be the thread that ILX announces it on.

http://blogs.suntimes.com/ebert/2008/12/win_ben_steins_mind.html

absolutely unrelentingly brutal, verging on cruel in its asymmetry! nonetheless deserved.

Roger Ebert
I submit to you that when it comes to smiles, Joey Lauren Adams is right up there with Kerry Washington and Marisa Tomei.

I'm aving a lot of health troubles that are keeping me from doing work and functioning online. Best person to contact is Chaz. Not in best of shape.

:(

"In the film the world of 2018 (referred to in the tagline as 'the not too distant future') is a global corporate state, containing entities such as the Energy Corporation, a global energy monopoly based in Houston, which deals with nominally peer corporations controlling access to all transport, luxury, housing, communication, and food on a global basis."

oh

soylent green is set in 2022 just fyi