The aftermath of Nedtopia 2002

And as proven BY SCIENCE, the ultimate cliched ILx statement would be something like: "It's this mentalist cockfarmer thing that rOxOr, do you SEE? FITE!"

I surprisingly have no complaints. Tracdr hugged me about 50 trilliont imes, it was nice of him. Other females = da bomb. i hope you cn all make it for my mesican fiesta.

Wow Ned that was qwick of you. See the orig Nedtopia thread for a comment from little ol jess...

Aww Ally how sweet. I'm confident we can hold down the womanly fort for as long as necessary. In other news, everyone was lovely & welcoming, thanks all. See some of you tomorrow for TexMex & tequila.

That smoke machine crap gave me a headache, whine whine.

Jesus, that was FAST.

I had a faboo time, and wish I didn't have to leave so early to get back to humdrum old CT. Pleasure meeting all y'all, of course. (I think I swore a fuck of a lot, though - very unbecoming.)

When, praytell, is Ally's mescalin party?

Oh, tomorrow. Well, funk that, then.

I'm still in awe of how NICE everything was today. Gorgeous weather, the walk from the subway stop to the Blind Tiger was quaint and charming, everyone was super nice and generous (and I forgot to buy a round, damn it) - it was marvelous.

I'd go on, but it's getting late(r).

MY STRUGGLE:

(by little Jess Harvell, aged 8.)

So, I got up at 9 am yesterday, hungover but ready to roll. I left the house at 10:30, planning a loverly day in NYC. Somewhere on the highway I decided, "hey, instead of doing the smart thing and driving to the PA train station that I know how to get to and where I know there'll be a parking spot, lets drive all the way into NEW JERSEY the topography of which I know nothing of to save TIME and MONEY." So I did, and for the first 1.5 it was fine. Nice drive, windows down, "banging tunes" as the kids say on the radio. So, I get to Trenton. No spaces available at the NJT station. Okay, okay...no big deal. I'm not gonna pay for parking, so let's just drive on to Princeton where I know there's a big lot and it's Saturday and all... After driving around (in the most horrendous traffic I've ever encountered outside of a major city, I might add) for close to an hour in Princeton trying to find the station, I give up. Well, the sign says only 30 miles to New Brunswick. I know there's a station there. Little did I know it was 30 MILES OF SINGLE LANE 35 MPH SUBURBAN BACKROAD. SO, another hour or so later, after a few missteps with exits, I get to New Brunswick. And there's not even a parking lot. FUCK. It's around 3-ish, so I know if I can still make it if I hurry. Reisgned to the fact that my dumb ass is going to be paying for parking, I scramble around New Brunswick looking vainly for a lot. And then, the car stops. Well, that's funny. And this sure is a bad neighborhood. Suffice to say, my cracka ass found a mechanic (for I - who do not own a car - am mechanicaly disinclined), who told me that the car was just out of gas. Even though the gas gauge was still reading at least a half a tank? Oh, it's probably just stuck. You should have that checked out, it happens a lot in these cars. So, I pay him. I pay $20 for a full tank of gas to get home. I prepare to murder my parents for lending me their lemon. It is now close to 5. The dream is dead. I head home. Oh, and my stomach starts hurting on the way home because I haven't eaten anything all day. So I stop off at the first thing I see (in the middle of nowhere Jersey.) A Kentucky Fried Chicken. At which I buy the number 3 combo meal. Which I then proceed to vomit (for reasons unknown) all over rt. 95 about an hour later. (I -could- have gone to the take out Indian place next door, but I was afraid it might be "bad.")

And who do I blame in all this? NED.

I don't blame Ned at all of course, but it is standard proceedure to blame a scapegoat or sacrificial lamb.

Moral of story: don't get the #3

Jess it's obvious that you're just coyly teasing us so that we become further beguiled by you.

hilarious addendum: my stomachs been doing the hurdy gurdy man all day now.

also, i had a dream last night where popshots came back from the meet up and shared someones snarky comment: "well, it's obvious why jess prefers a long distance relationship, because he can't be seen in public." so go to hell, tracer. ;)

Wow, it's like he was actually there!

Oi! And what about thee BRUNCH!?

you cockfarmer.

And what about thee BRUNCH!?

Do you want the chivalric account, the show all working account, or the wooden horse account?

Ally was surprisingly shy and quiet, possibly hung over from last night, or shellshocked by Ned's intensity.

There was a black girl who'd never heard of ILE, but seemed happy to join in our 'CB radio convention'.

Mike Daddino was bright and blushed a lot when speaking.

I decided that Tracer Hand was very cool.

I hid up at the end of the table with a phalanx of beautiful Asian women (Taiwanese art student Yuh-Shioh and my ex-wife Shazna).

Nitsuh called to cancel because he had a flight at 3 o'clock, which was a shame.

To outsiders we probably looked somewhat ill-assorted, rather nerdy and smiley. There was a total absence of bad vibes. A bit of a love-in, I'd say. I wanted to hug Ally at the end, but I was too shy.

Not hung over, shellshocked from personal issues going on resulting in me having to stay up ALL NIGHT TONIGHT waiting for someone and then dragging him to Peter's so as to not wake up my travelling friend who has to wake up veddy veddy early in the morning...but I am surprisingly quiet, I am not a confrontational person in real life unless necessary, I am a very sweet and lovely girl as Momus is now vouching for, and if he is willing to vouch that then you know it's all true. I had a lovely time at brunch. Momus is a very personable individual in real life, the girls who showed up with him - whose names I've unfortunately forgotten - both seemed like lovely individuals as well. Me and Tracer just held up the half drunk, dramatic personal lives bitching end of the table, not eating our food and just blathering on about mutual friends. After you departed, Momus, we headed over to the Elizabeth center to buy Sanrio toys. Everyone was lovely, Good World was MUCh better this time than last, and it was a nice day all around. Next time I have a Mexican fiesta you should come, Momus (even if my house is above Grand) because we had quite an interesting evening, where a very old friend of mine who I thought was still in Michigan showed up randomly, followed by my crazy ex roommate showing up unannounced. Such is life.

And if you had come to hug me, I would've hugged you. I'm too shy for hugs myself.

Shyness and good vibes over belligerence and bad vibes any day of the year, sez I! And it was a good experience all around -- the food at Good World is mighty tasty, they make a good eggs benedict (get the salmon) -- and a fun day. I will always remember the inadvertant way that Momus got Elisha to wake up thanks to a reference to a certain MC. ;-) Nichole (with an h!) was the non-ILE person there out of my friends, but she's interested and will likely descend on these boards with intensity soon enough. :-) A pleasure to meet Shazna, who was most friendly, and Yuh-Shioh, who seemed terribly bemused by us. Don't blame her. :-)

I'm about out of here -- finishing this post up, calling Super Shuttle to confirm, then sleep, morning shower and shave and I'm off to JFK and home. To everyone on the boards who I met for the first time -- Mike Daddino, David R., Ben, Nitsuh, Michelangelo (you are the most intense friendly person I've ever met -- a compliment, I assure you!), BNW, Laurel/Pyth, Elisha/Tracer Hand -- and to Momus again and especially Ally for being a very gracious host indeed, my thanks and much more! Jess, I'll catch you when I visit Brian next. :-) Everyone else -- dunno exactly when I'll be out to NYC next, but Terrastock in Boston is definite in October, and I'd love to see as many of you folks there as I can. If you're not up for the music, come for the hell of it! :-) Remember, I'll have plenty of Dunedin stories by that time. ;-)

The scary part is I felt more comfortable around the nice ILE people then I did with my "friends" later that night. And Ned doesn't look like a hippy or howard stern.

Dude hey, I should've told you about my Mexican fiesta, that was totally my bad, I even thought to invite you then got on that huge ass situation via cell phone like 30 times and forgot. EVERYONE IS DA BOMB - oh and especially Pyth, cheers to holding up the women's front here, you gotta give me a ring sometime to hang again, I'll round up Tracer and the crew and we can go to...what the hell was that place, Franks? Whatever, we'll do something. You gotta meet the infamous Comedy Team (TM) (aka my posse) anyhow.

Ah, love is all around.

But (the burning question in my mind) did anyone refer to Mr. Currie as "Mo"?

Burning Question:

Was Nick wearing some type of eyewear at brunch? I called to leave a message for a Nick Currie; I was asked for a description; I said: "He's a tall Scottish guy who may very well be wearing an eyepatch or a monocle." Before I even finish the monocle part, I hear the guy say, "Hey, are you Nick?"

My girlperson laughed and said: "He must be wearing the eyepatch."

And of course, thanks to everyone; you were all great and I'm still pissed off about having to miss brunch, as I didn't get out of Manhattan until 1:30 and thus probably could have made it. My only complaints are that (a) Laurel and Ally were so cruelly uninterested in my thoughts on makeup, and (b) no one else noticed Rufus Wainwright (although to be fair Elisha was the only one who had a chance, and he was right in the middle of a sentence that I seem to remember being as great as everything else he had to say).

My girlperson laughed

Don't you mean 'my personfriend'? Or has 'friend' now become an unacceptably charged term? What about, in that case, 'my personperson'?

Momus = unreconstructed Acquaintancist, oppressing all with his disgusting preference for those he knows and likes

I do remember that in the thread wars centring on the question of 'Persons Who Exclusively Date Other Persons', a certain person seemed to be suggesting that any kind of personal preference made one unpersonable and persona non grata.

Personally I like what elderly art critic and all-round elegant person Robert Hughes said in his book about Political Correctness: 'Once you could say 'girl' but you couldn't say 'fuck'. Now you can say 'fuck' but you can't say 'girl'.

"Girlperson" = I am still pretty sure that she is female (whence "girl") but not entirely sure of the state of the interpersonal relationship (whence "person") = apparently no longer "girlfriend" but now simply a person who is a girl who was around at the time and laughed about the eyepatch = girl ... person?

Answer the damned question, though!

Arrr, you won't be let off the (Cap'n) Hook that easy, m'lad!

Yes, I was wearing the eye patch. Without it I am google-eyed. That's why I come across so often as an enraged Googler.

Rufus Wainwright was at our meet?

Supposedly, Rufus (or a facsimile thereof) was @ the 2nd bar (the one after the Blind Tiger, but before dinner). Nitsuh noticed him, pointed him out to Ned, and Ned had a mild flounce. I was gonna go check it out, but I was too comfy in my chair.

Of course, mentioning this will only allow Ned another opportunity to rail on Rufus, which is wrong in sooooo many ways.

2nd bar = Kettle of Fish. Where was Rufus? In the front room? Or was he one of the group settled under the dartboards?

Sorry I missed the second half of the Saturday meet-up and the Sunday brunch. Getting out of bed was inconceivable, but it was a pleasure to meet those of you I hadn't met already.

No no no no, Rufus wasn't in the bar. He walked by on the corner. The rest of you were already at the bar door, and Elisha and I were bringing up the rear. He crossed right in front of us, and I was like, "So sorry to interrupt, Elisha, but I didn't hear anything you just said because Rufus Wainwright just walked by." Then he said something like "Don't tell Ned, or else Ned will go punch him." So we went inside, and then I told Ned.

And Ned, unprompted, punched that section of the air where he wanted Rufus's emotional mug to be. "Aaaand... SCENE."

Momus, it's my height that will allow me to defeat MC PB in a to-me-already-much-anticipated catwalk FITE. He can rap, yes, but I can strut.

You should be on Fashion TV, or Fashion Emergency maybe even. You can teach the slouchy fashion losers how to STRUT THEIR SHIT.

The funniest thing was how confused everyone who wasn't me or you at the table was when you did that. I almost lost my shit completely.

And Ned, unprompted, punched that section of the air where he wanted Rufus's emotional mug to be.

You have to start SOMEWHERE. *killhuntslay*

I was sort of startled by how much my mental image of folks matched up with their fleshly reality. We joked about how "now we can never go back" to the ultimo-enlightenment rational space of disembodied texts, but it really wasn't that much of a shock. (Oh EXCEPT for Michelangelo who gloriously shattered all my prior stained-glass imaginings of him as a bookish sort in his early 40s. BZZT wrong, play again.)

One would think that the oodles and oodles of picture threads would have helped, Tracer...

(Sorry, I'm just bitchy because I COULDN'T GO.)

Yes, Ally was bemused by the fact that she's seen you three times and I not the once. AND WHAT DO YOU HAVE AGAINST ME? *sobs* You better not have any damn rehearsals Terrastock weekend, ya punk. ;-)

But if Ned and Dan meet won't all time end or something. Its like meeting yourself from a difference time. Won't they cancel each other out?

::sobs uncontrollably at missed opportunities and cruel cruel fate::

Dan just doesn't like any of you, sorry.

How do you know Ned isn't Dan in makeup? Or that Dan isn't Ned in makeup? Eh? Eh????

Nedan, you didn't tell me you knew Rick Baker! Nice!

*adjusts wig, whiteface foundation and platform shoes* That's the silliest thing I've ever heard, Nicole.

Dan doesn't look like Howard Stern.

DAVER POPSHOTS! "Nedan" is perilously close to "Neden". Are you calling us pussies? 'Cuz I ain't afraid to FITE!

Don't you mean "we", Nedan?

Do not taunt us, Nicole. You wouldn't like us when we're angry.

Actually, you can call Ned Nedan if you call me Daned. I'm perfectly cool with selling myself out.

Did either of you / both of you / YOU see _Suture_? If you have, you'll not be surprised to learn that this conundrum makes me think of said flick. (And I'm sure Daned wouldn't mind being compared to Dennis Haysbert.) (The guy that'd be Nedan, though ... he's kinda weasely, which is quite unlike the Raggett.)

Like I said - Suture.

SCENE: the Thirties, upper Slobomoldova, the usual spooky hilltop castle. From a laboratory, a shambling, horrifying figure with a somewhat curious physical appearance but exquisite taste in music and culture stumbles off into the night with a laptop under its arm. ENTER Dr. Raggettstein.

RAGGETTSTEIN: "DAMN YOU, my creation, my fusion of two essences! Stop going off to chat with unsuspecting people on the Internet. BACK, BACK!"

Hiya all,

I was just looking round, when I popped into this subject. I was the dark chick at the mighty brunch, and yup, twas a total blast. (Hola, Ally, Mike, Tracer, and merry Momus, o'course;>) If you must wonder what Ned looks like, how about this description: "mad doctor with a hidden hatchet"?

Course, I COULD be trying to spare all of you from the truth....;>

Nichole (with the "h")

Astounding! And now that Nichole is here, hurrah! :-)

emoticon for mad doctor with hidden hatchet:

o8)

I hate you all b/c I couldn't meet you. NYC would be nice now.

(bows to Ned) Many thanks...;>

Tracer, I am only left to wonder _where_ our mad doc hid the mighty hatchet....and your dance was a work of art....