Boris Johnson hasn't been to Fratton Park this season

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http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/hampshire/6521603.stm

LOL.

― Matt DC, Wednesday, 4 April 2007 08:19 (nineteen years ago)

"Here we are, in one of the most depressed towns in Southern England, a place that is arguably too full of drugs, obesity, underachievement and Labour MPs."

He forgot squaddies, paedophiles and bad footballers.

― Matt DC, Wednesday, 4 April 2007 08:20 (nineteen years ago)

i've just realised that i've never had a single passing thought about portsmouth in my life so far.

― lex pretend, Wednesday, 4 April 2007 08:24 (nineteen years ago)

http://www.springfieldwesley.org/2005-2006/Pictures/soccer/2006-04-03-053.jpg

― Frogman Henry, Wednesday, 4 April 2007 08:34 (nineteen years ago)

I love Boris. He's one of the few politicians left in England who seems to have no engagement between brain and spin filter before he speaks. Which makes him just so endlessly entertaining.

― Masonic Boom, Wednesday, 4 April 2007 09:32 (nineteen years ago)

His roman empire progs showed him to be a fascist fuckwad of the first order, rather than merely an entertaining wodehousian bufoon.

― Frogman Henry, Wednesday, 4 April 2007 09:35 (nineteen years ago)

shouldn't be in politics

― blueski, Wednesday, 4 April 2007 09:36 (nineteen years ago)

I love Boris. He's one of the few politicians left in England who seems to have no engagement between brain and spin filter before he speaks. Which makes him just so endlessly entertaining.

Nick Griffin, too.

― Dom Passantino, Wednesday, 4 April 2007 09:36 (nineteen years ago)

Boris is exactly the sort of people who *should* be in politics. Keep them out of trouble.

― Masonic Boom, Wednesday, 4 April 2007 09:37 (nineteen years ago)

Isn't Primus a good footballer?

Portsmouth: the Mary Rose and HMS Victory, cannons, yachts, frigates, the ferry that goes to the Isle of Wight.

I sometimes forget there's an actual town around those things.

― Grandpont Genie, Wednesday, 4 April 2007 09:39 (nineteen years ago)

no engagement between brain... before (s)he speaks

― Frogman Henry, Wednesday, 4 April 2007 09:40 (nineteen years ago)

Boris is exactly the sort of people who *should* be in politics. Keep them out of trouble.

not really working

― blueski, Wednesday, 4 April 2007 09:40 (nineteen years ago)

After reading about the kebab wars in Portsmouth in 'Crap Towns' I am resolved more than ever that indie chicken is the way to go.

― Sarah, Wednesday, 4 April 2007 09:41 (nineteen years ago)

I can only think that if Barry George had have gotten into politics, Jill Dando would still be with us today. RIP The Crimewatch Presenter of Hearts.

― Dom Passantino, Wednesday, 4 April 2007 09:47 (nineteen years ago)

Boris is an entertaining celebrity. The thought that anyone might think that he is any way a good person or would put any kind of gravitas behind his opinions scares me. The fact that he may may end up running something important within the next 12 months scares me even more.

― The Wayward Johnny B, Wednesday, 4 April 2007 09:58 (nineteen years ago)

Look, better a Tory that you can actually *see* and *hear* his reactionary opinions, rather one of those whitewashed (greenwashed?) spin-doctored and spin-dried David Cameron types.

― Masonic Boom, Wednesday, 4 April 2007 10:00 (nineteen years ago)

better no devil at all

― blueski, Wednesday, 4 April 2007 10:05 (nineteen years ago)

he did say 'arguably'. i don't see what the fuss is about.

― That one guy that quit, Wednesday, 4 April 2007 10:31 (nineteen years ago)

why single out portsmouth for obesity and underachievement and drugs problems though?

― That one guy that quit, Wednesday, 4 April 2007 10:32 (nineteen years ago)

not sure. it feels like the profile of portsmouth as a slum and a bad place to live* has definitely increased over the last few years

*ive never been there, so i dont know, im just talking media profile

why this is, im not sure. perhaps related to the 'renaissance' of the northern cities (which basically means leeds, and maybe newcastle). but you are much more likely to read about portsmouth being terrible than you are sheffield (a northern city that hasnt boomed)

― 600, Wednesday, 4 April 2007 10:43 (nineteen years ago)

it's odd because portsmouth has surely become a lot more cosmopolitan and 'trendified' with expansion and cultural enrichment (in line with many other cities across the country - tho it's easy to project and sell this as illusion) in this same time it's meant to have deteriorated.

― blueski, Wednesday, 4 April 2007 10:51 (nineteen years ago)

"Here we are, in one of the most depressed towns in Southern England, a place that is arguably too full of drugs, obesity, underachievement and Labour MPs."

Is he not just getting Portsmouth confused with Westminster again?

― NickB, Wednesday, 4 April 2007 10:52 (nineteen years ago)

maybe it has blueski. perhaps dj martian will be along to tell us how the prices have changed in certain establishments.

it is perception though, not reality. and perception often lags behind reality

― 600, Wednesday, 4 April 2007 10:58 (nineteen years ago)

I didn't click here for ages. I thought it was a football thread!

― Mark G, Wednesday, 4 April 2007 11:10 (nineteen years ago)

The only thing that could possibly overcome the evil power of f**tb*ll is Boris Johnson.

― Masonic Boom, Wednesday, 4 April 2007 11:13 (nineteen years ago)

didnt he used to play in goal for nonleague Harlow Town in his youth?

― 600, Wednesday, 4 April 2007 11:14 (nineteen years ago)

if footballers challenges were as evil as Johnson's then they'd all be banned for life.

― blueski, Wednesday, 4 April 2007 11:15 (nineteen years ago)

navy towns often have a rough reputation.

― That one guy that quit, Wednesday, 4 April 2007 11:19 (nineteen years ago)

didnt he used to play in goal for nonleague Harlow Town in his youth?

Oddly enough I spent (some of) my youth watching non-league Harlow Town, and much as it would be amusing to confirm his goalkeeping skills, I'd say I'm 99% certain this didn't happen.

― Nasty, Brutish & Short, Wednesday, 4 April 2007 11:29 (nineteen years ago)

I have a friend who lives in Portsmouth. He says it's pretty rough there. He's had people attack him randomly outside clubs for being a student (he's not a student any more, this was a few years ago). But then he's 6'4", and not the skinny 6'4" I am, he's a big bloke, so he battered them.

― Colonel Poo, Wednesday, 4 April 2007 11:31 (nineteen years ago)

6ft4 people hang out together?

― Mark G, Wednesday, 4 April 2007 11:34 (nineteen years ago)

All my schoolfriends were over 6ft. Not deliberately or anything, just seemed to be a lot of tall people in my year.

― Colonel Poo, Wednesday, 4 April 2007 11:36 (nineteen years ago)

There used to be one club on the seafront (Joanna's - now shut down I think) that was only ever frequented by Navy personnel. The university handbook warned you avoid it if "you look even vaguely like a student".

Bozzer's assessment was way off the mark: he forgot to mention the LibDems. Probably spent all his time in North End and Stamshaw.

― robster, Wednesday, 4 April 2007 11:48 (nineteen years ago)

Portsmouth has either the cheapest or the most expensive drugs in the country, I forget which.

― Dom Passantino, Wednesday, 4 April 2007 11:50 (nineteen years ago)

Joanna's - "The Naval Academy of Dancing".

― aldo, Wednesday, 4 April 2007 12:02 (nineteen years ago)

http://www.nme.com/news/babyshambles/27533

― stevie, Wednesday, 4 April 2007 13:51 (nineteen years ago)

OK, that's a step too far. Boris should now apologise to the city of Henley for letting Doherty in.

― Masonic Boom, Wednesday, 4 April 2007 13:52 (nineteen years ago)

ach, Pete's always knocking around Henley.

fair sends me back, it does!

― Mark G, Wednesday, 4 April 2007 14:04 (nineteen years ago)

Send him back to Hackney! I am going to write a letter in protest.

Dear Mr. Echo...

No, wait. I'm not an anarchist!

― Masonic Boom, Wednesday, 4 April 2007 14:06 (nineteen years ago)

Doherty finally morphing into Tracey Thorn in that nme pic.

― Frogman Henry, Wednesday, 4 April 2007 14:19 (nineteen years ago)

also, "effort".

― Grandpont Genie, Wednesday, 4 April 2007 14:22 (nineteen years ago)

Still Hilarious

― Uptoeleven, Wednesday, 4 April 2007 15:04 (nineteen years ago)

"It confirms once and again that the town is one of the most cool, jiving, happening places in the south of England."

har

― That one guy that quit, Wednesday, 4 April 2007 16:12 (nineteen years ago)

push out the jive

― blueski, Wednesday, 4 April 2007 16:29 (nineteen years ago)

http://i20.photobucket.com/albums/b231/JB1215/backgrounds/buttcrack.jpg

DJ Martian listening to darkwave earlier while enjoying the Portsmouth sunshine.

― Billy Dods, Wednesday, 4 April 2007 16:40 (nineteen years ago)

He's fully conscious of that old-fashioned language/tics/bearing thing, it's an act, he's not some endearing forgetful fish-out-of-water like Kate says he is. His brain is fully plugged in. This is what his auld acquaintances say about him: he found an image derived fromm books and films which made people/(girls) laugh back in school, refined it as a young man, and has stuck to it, calculatingly. That use of 'jiving' is an ultimate example - "oh boris, using a word at least 30 years out of date! how delightfully naive and ingenuous" No. He selected it deliberately. He's a shrewd jive cat. I don't find him funny.

― Frogman Henry, Wednesday, 4 April 2007 16:42 (nineteen years ago)

He's also a completely phoney provacateur, i'm sure of it. He wants to be liked by everybody, really. That's why he often gives the game away.
Going splendidly with "drugs, obesity (waitaminnit is this fat guy for real? how does obesity make a place depressed?), underachievement (woah! is he aware that the inhabitants are going to be insulted by this?), and Labour MPs(oh. punchline. you're just a shit stand-up comic, aren't you you prick)"
He wants to be talked about, celebrated over dinnertables and viral emails, guffawed over in the pub. That's his raison-d'etre.

― Frogman Henry, Wednesday, 4 April 2007 16:59 (nineteen years ago)

he's not some endearing forgetful fish-out-of-water like Kate says he is.

Oi! No putting words in my mouth, please.

I know it's an act. But it's a refreshing act. (And an endearing one.)

― Masonic Boom, Wednesday, 4 April 2007 17:01 (nineteen years ago)

frogman i don't think anyone is going to disagree with you.

"That use of 'jiving' is an ultimate example - "oh boris, using a word at least 30 years out of date! how delightfully naive and ingenuous" No. He selected it deliberately."

yet another louis jagger parallel.

― That one guy that quit, Wednesday, 4 April 2007 17:12 (nineteen years ago)

I think Boris Johnson gets away with being a lot more truthful about what he (and/or Tories) actually think *because* he couches that in this fluffy, what ho old boy personna.

I would *much* rather that than the smiling faking pseudo-Blair Tories who make noises about being green while having their staff drive behind their bicycles with a limo to carry their shoes and shirt.

And it's freaking naive to toss around things like "oh, conservatives shouldn't exist" - well, naive at best, and downright scary if you actually think you're going to somehow make politics better by doing away with the Opposition party alltogether. I mean, yay, no Tories, no conservatives, hurrah - hello to monolithic single party politics, yeah THAT'S a great idea.

Wishing Tories away is not going to make them, or the people they appeal to, disappear. I'd much rather they were honest about their aims and beliefs - like Boris's personna allows him to be.

And I find that personna immensely entertaining, to boot.

― Masonic Boom, Wednesday, 4 April 2007 17:21 (nineteen years ago)

frogman makes sense. i don't think anyone was saying "oh, conservatives shouldn't exist" as such? although you could make a stronger argument for it given the similarity between both main parties on many issues combined with actual divide within both parties on certain other issues.

― blueski, Wednesday, 4 April 2007 19:43 (nineteen years ago)

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