A thread for asking "What Would You Rather Do?"

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WWYRD?

Either...

A/ Sip on big mugs of coffee all the time, constantly so when you finish one you have to start enjoying the next one like chain coffee 24/7 (instant Maxwell House) for 12 years.

or....

B// Dip your arm in one of those bloody frier things that them man has at the fish and apple-of -the -earth shop so you arm gets all batter-up. Then whack some salt and vinegar on that fool and munch a bit of that yummy batter off of that sucker/prick.

― the next grozart, Thursday, 5 April 2007 14:22 (nineteen years ago)

ok it's obviously a since that doesn't involve mutilating part of my body? this question is terrible.

― the schef (adam schefter ha ha), Thursday, 5 April 2007 14:23 (nineteen years ago)

Yeah but you wouldn't sleep for ages. Plus, yuck instant coffee! I think I'd go for B if I was allowed to inject myself with drug first.

― the next grozart, Thursday, 5 April 2007 14:27 (nineteen years ago)

inject myself with drug? those bloody frier things that them man has?

― ghost rider, Thursday, 5 April 2007 14:28 (nineteen years ago)

http://farm1.static.flickr.com/170/436639945_01066904e5.jpg

― ghost rider, Thursday, 5 April 2007 14:28 (nineteen years ago)

ghost rider 8080. this question is even worse than pete's usual "moth in someone else's broth versus eat a disgusting moth" one.

― the schef (adam schefter ha ha), Thursday, 5 April 2007 14:31 (nineteen years ago)

also seriously instant coffee v burning ALL OF THE SKIN OFF MY ARM? are you really asking this question? think about it.

― the schef (adam schefter ha ha), Thursday, 5 April 2007 14:31 (nineteen years ago)

aww pete hasn't asked the moth question in a while

― ghost rider, Thursday, 5 April 2007 14:32 (nineteen years ago)

Haha yeah this is up there with CAKE OR DEATH? really.

― Matt DC, Thursday, 5 April 2007 14:32 (nineteen years ago)

FOR 12 YEARS THOUGH? EVEN WHEN YOU'RE TRYING TO SLEEP?

― the next grozart, Thursday, 5 April 2007 14:33 (nineteen years ago)

i pick A

no-one said anything about actually swallowing the coffee. 'finishing' it just means emptying the mug by sipping - you can just sip and spit, sip and spit...

― blueski, Thursday, 5 April 2007 14:34 (nineteen years ago)

what the hell?

― That one guy that quit, Thursday, 5 April 2007 14:34 (nineteen years ago)

no, man up and drink it dude, i mean grozart is going to amputate his own arm and eat it just so you can have the freedom to drink that coffee.

― the schef (adam schefter ha ha), Thursday, 5 April 2007 14:35 (nineteen years ago)

Okay, you didn't like that one how about:

A) Get really into the IRA including some tattoos on your forearms and paint one of those terrorists on the outside of your house, and speak in a fake Irish accent. For a year. (Tattoos must be permanent but you can have them removed afterwards with surgery)

B) Grow a beard and get heavily into Islam, wearing a burka etc (even if you are a man), and hint to people that you'd like to see the infidels crushed. For a year. (The full facer must be kept for a year afterwards) (If you can't grow a beard you must get hair implants)

― the next grozart, Thursday, 5 April 2007 14:35 (nineteen years ago)

perhaps you should help write 'saw 4', grozart.

― That one guy that quit, Thursday, 5 April 2007 14:35 (nineteen years ago)

I'D LIKE TO POINT ONE THING OUT.

Aaaaahhhh...

That's better. Thank you.

― Frogman Henry, Thursday, 5 April 2007 14:36 (nineteen years ago)

TS - a blowjob that lasts for 12 years vs burning your face of with a blowtorch.

― Matt DC, Thursday, 5 April 2007 14:37 (nineteen years ago)

would you rather eat cheesecake until you feel kinda sick or get stung to death by bees

― ghost rider, Thursday, 5 April 2007 14:37 (nineteen years ago)

Matt, you have the wrong end of the stick with this thread, hoo boy!

― the next grozart, Thursday, 5 April 2007 14:38 (nineteen years ago)

I guess Americ's drink a lot of coffee anyway. Somehow I'd rather have a few quick burns than no sleep and terible halitosis and a general feeling of sweaty nerves for twelve full years.

― the next grozart, Thursday, 5 April 2007 14:39 (nineteen years ago)

'terrible halitosis' vs eating own arm, hmmmmm.

― That one guy that quit, Thursday, 5 April 2007 14:40 (nineteen years ago)

not the WHOLE ARM! just a bit of it.

― the next grozart, Thursday, 5 April 2007 14:40 (nineteen years ago)

― That one guy that quit, Thursday, 5 April 2007 14:41 (nineteen years ago)

next grozart have you seen that South Park episode where they're trying to decide between a giant douche or a turd sandwich for President? PREPARE TO HAVE MIND BLOWN!

― blueski, Thursday, 5 April 2007 14:41 (nineteen years ago)

Matt DC you didn't specify who would be providing the blowjob?

― blueski, Thursday, 5 April 2007 14:42 (nineteen years ago)

Plus instant coffee is super disgusto. The skin on your arm would grow back before 12 years. And who knows, it might taste just great/good.

― the next grozart, Thursday, 5 April 2007 14:42 (nineteen years ago)

xpost - John Bolton.

― the next grozart, Thursday, 5 April 2007 14:42 (nineteen years ago)

the thing is every morning i have to choose between terrible pain/permanent injury and being me for another couple years

― ghost rider, Thursday, 5 April 2007 14:43 (nineteen years ago)

i mean, i guess it doesn't really matter as that's clearly the best option but still i think it would be nice to know.

― blueski, Thursday, 5 April 2007 14:43 (nineteen years ago)

if it is john bolton i think i'd prefer the blowtorch.

― the next grozart, Thursday, 5 April 2007 14:43 (nineteen years ago)

who is john bolton?

― blueski, Thursday, 5 April 2007 14:44 (nineteen years ago)

WHAT WOULD LEMMY DO?!?!?

http://www.motorhead.ru/gigs/stefano/cr-lemmy.jpg

SLEEP?!?!? SLEEP IS FOR MUTHAFUCKING PUSSIES!!! I BEEN UP FOR FOUR DECADES ON METHAMPHETAMINES, NEVER DID ME NO HARM HA HA HA HA COFFEE AIN'T NUTTIN' KEEP MOVIN' LIKE A PARALLELOGRAM!!!

― Masonic Boom, Thursday, 5 April 2007 14:45 (nineteen years ago)

i think the 12-year blowjob sounds kind of rubbish.

― That one guy that quit, Thursday, 5 April 2007 14:45 (nineteen years ago)

It's from the Dalai Lama.

― Matt DC, Thursday, 5 April 2007 14:45 (nineteen years ago)

well he must not be very good at it

― ghost rider, Thursday, 5 April 2007 14:46 (nineteen years ago)

Lemmy is from the Bronx now I see.

― the next grozart, Thursday, 5 April 2007 14:46 (nineteen years ago)

Lemmy is from SPACE.

― Masonic Boom, Thursday, 5 April 2007 14:47 (nineteen years ago)

Which bit?

― the next grozart, Thursday, 5 April 2007 14:48 (nineteen years ago)

the bronx

― the schef (adam schefter ha ha), Thursday, 5 April 2007 14:48 (nineteen years ago)

Ha ha I can totally imagine Lemmy saying something like that!

― kv_nol, Thursday, 5 April 2007 14:48 (nineteen years ago)

I prefer What Would Lee Perry Do?

― blueski, Thursday, 5 April 2007 14:48 (nineteen years ago)

HE IS A VENUSIAN SPACE BASSIST, SAYS SO RIGHT HERE IN THE HAWKWIND LINER NOTES.

― Masonic Boom, Thursday, 5 April 2007 14:48 (nineteen years ago)

I hear that sleep is the cousin of death. Confirm/deny?

― Dom Passantino, Thursday, 5 April 2007 14:49 (nineteen years ago)

Anyway, Lemmy went, like, three tours without changing his shoes or socks to the point where he got trenchfoot so bad he had to get his boots surgically removed. Do you think a little batter fryer is gonna intimidate him? I don't think he's felt his arms since 1972 anyway.

― Masonic Boom, Thursday, 5 April 2007 14:52 (nineteen years ago)

ok shut up

― the schef (adam schefter ha ha), Thursday, 5 April 2007 14:54 (nineteen years ago)

Fuck off, this thread is about Lemmy now.

― Masonic Boom, Thursday, 5 April 2007 14:55 (nineteen years ago)

ISN'T THERE A CRUSH THREAD NOT FILLED WITH PICTURES OF UNKEMPT ARYAN JAILBAIT YOU SHOULD BE ON RIGHT NOW

― ghost rider, Thursday, 5 April 2007 14:58 (nineteen years ago)

no, it was a lot funnier before you showed up, please leave. i'd like to hear some more of grozart's questions.

― the schef (adam schefter ha ha), Thursday, 5 April 2007 14:58 (nineteen years ago)

hi ghost rider, would you rather eat a disgusting moth, or put a moth in kate's broth?

― the schef (adam schefter ha ha), Thursday, 5 April 2007 14:58 (nineteen years ago)

No it's not.

What Would You Rather Do?

A. poke yourself (quite hard) in the eye with a toy plane

or

B. lick a live wasp.

― the next grozart, Thursday, 5 April 2007 14:58 (nineteen years ago)

Skipping 17 messages at this point... Click here if you want to load them all.

i make that choice every day.

― That one guy that quit, Thursday, 5 April 2007 15:36 (nineteen years ago)

my best friend in junior high used to eat onions just like that, btw. it was very disturbing.

― the schef (adam schefter ha ha), Thursday, 5 April 2007 15:36 (nineteen years ago)

i will take the onion.

― kenan, Thursday, 5 April 2007 15:39 (nineteen years ago)

after smoking a bunch of unfiltered cigs, an onion might actually improve my breath

― kenan, Thursday, 5 April 2007 15:40 (nineteen years ago)

i will take the onion.

to Mordor?

― blueski, Thursday, 5 April 2007 15:42 (nineteen years ago)

it's burden is too great to bear alone.

― blueski, Thursday, 5 April 2007 15:42 (nineteen years ago)

hi ghost rider, would you rather eat a disgusting moth, or put a moth in kate's broth?

-- the schef (adam schefter ha ha), Thursday, April 5, 2007 10:58 AM (50 minutes ago)

DAMMIT I JUST NOTICED THIS THREAD AND WAS GONNA ASK THIS BUT I CTRL+F'ED FOR "MOTH"

― 69, Thursday, 5 April 2007 15:50 (nineteen years ago)

http://images.nfl.com/images/2005/sbmilk.jpg

― Fluffy Bear Hearts Rainbows, Thursday, 5 April 2007 16:02 (nineteen years ago)

well that's stupid, you can still drink your gross milk even if you lose a football game.

― ghost rider, Thursday, 5 April 2007 16:04 (nineteen years ago)

the jake delhomme and ty law one was much gayer.

― the schef (adam schefter ha ha), Thursday, 5 April 2007 16:07 (nineteen years ago)

"i want the ball"
"well come and get it"

― the schef (adam schefter ha ha), Thursday, 5 April 2007 16:07 (nineteen years ago)

That's a jar of Dick Butkus cum from the hall of fame.

― Fluffy Bear Hearts Rainbows, Thursday, 5 April 2007 16:08 (nineteen years ago)

yeah i remember that from jackass 2 as well

― the schef (adam schefter ha ha), Thursday, 5 April 2007 16:09 (nineteen years ago)

Dick Butkus is a funny name.

― Fluffy Bear Hearts Rainbows, Thursday, 5 April 2007 16:15 (nineteen years ago)

...for so many reasons.

― Sara R-C, Thursday, 5 April 2007 16:15 (nineteen years ago)

If you google translate "dick butkus" into French and back into English, it's "butkus of Dick".

― Fluffy Bear Hearts Rainbows, Thursday, 5 April 2007 16:23 (nineteen years ago)

http://www.host800.de/imgServer/tumb-Judd-Nelson-als-John-Bender.jpg
new topic time

― the schef (adam schefter ha ha), Thursday, 5 April 2007 16:25 (nineteen years ago)

The one thing I think of when I think of Fred West (aside from, y'know, all that business) is that he used to eat onions like apples

― DJ Mencap, Thursday, 5 April 2007 16:31 (nineteen years ago)

i am not sure how it could be done, really. wouldn't the fumes get to you eventually? you'd be a mess of tears by the time you were half done.

― the schef (adam schefter ha ha), Thursday, 5 April 2007 16:34 (nineteen years ago)

story of my etc etc

― ghost rider, Thursday, 5 April 2007 16:35 (nineteen years ago)

this thread has proposed scenarios with two of my most hated things: stinging insects and raw onions.

fuck you thread.

― Ms Misery, Thursday, 5 April 2007 16:36 (nineteen years ago)

http://farm1.static.flickr.com/248/447358732_9e49fef22f.jpg?v=0

― Fluffy Bear Hearts Rainbows, Thursday, 5 April 2007 16:57 (nineteen years ago)

wow

― the schef (adam schefter ha ha), Thursday, 5 April 2007 16:58 (nineteen years ago)

i am not sure how it could be done, really. wouldn't the fumes get to you eventually? you'd be a mess of tears by the time you were half done.

Yeah thinking about it, it's strange how Fred West never had that problem

― DJ Mencap, Thursday, 5 April 2007 18:05 (nineteen years ago)

i am still unsatisfied (i.e. angry!!!) with the answers to these questions. FUCK !

― the next grozart, Friday, 6 April 2007 02:47 (nineteen years ago)

you should ought to be ashamed of your parents./

― the next grozart, Friday, 6 April 2007 02:48 (nineteen years ago)

TS:

Buying me all the booze I want for the rest of my life vs. buying me a nice house to live in (paid off, insurance, neccesary repairs included.)

― Oilyrags, Friday, 6 April 2007 12:31 (nineteen years ago)

Go for the house. Then as you add the booze gradually = totally handy liquor cabinet and wine cellar.

― Ned Raggett, Friday, 6 April 2007 12:32 (nineteen years ago)

I wonder how much a lifetime's worth of booze would add up to.

― Maria, Friday, 6 April 2007 14:32 (nineteen years ago)

Initially I thought booze bcz it's cheaper over the long run more likely (esp. since it would make you die sooner and there's always relatively cheap booze). Then I realize you (or anyone) deserves a happy & secure life rather than drinking you to death on my tab for selfish purposes. Also IMO everyone is an asshole today and too touchy today and I am crabby so then we could both sit in house and like count our blessings.

Assuming I'm reading right and the booze or house would be outta my theoretical pocket.

― Abbott, Friday, 6 April 2007 23:29 (nineteen years ago)

Hmmm...

let me reframe the question

What would you rather have: free booze for all your days, or a free house?

― Oilyrags, Friday, 6 April 2007 23:33 (nineteen years ago)

To answer MARIA: I know my monthly tab for just buying booze is $65 on avg. including mixers (abt. a fifth a week). A quick "back of the envelope" calculation, figuring this rate & adding 5% for inflation per year + 1% a year to maybe avg. out increases in 'sin tax' over time, I estimate I will spend $36,043.20 in 50 years. This is assuming I don't much go to bars, which I don't.

― Abbott, Friday, 6 April 2007 23:33 (nineteen years ago)

So based on that DEFINITELY a free house!

― Abbott, Friday, 6 April 2007 23:34 (nineteen years ago)

Free booze. Then I'd pick the really expensive wine and whiskies, sell them, buy house, get more booze.

― V, Friday, 6 April 2007 23:43 (nineteen years ago)

Or melt the bottles and cans and make a house. It might not work, but I'd be too drunk to care, and if the people who own the land complained I could just bribe them with free booze. Actually, the social benefits of being the woman who gets all the free booze could be pretty great, I could just live in a hotel in exchange for filling up their bar.

― V, Friday, 6 April 2007 23:51 (nineteen years ago)

Open a liquor store, obv. Make money on booze, have booze yourself, also buy house.

― Sara R-C, Saturday, 7 April 2007 00:06 (nineteen years ago)

Booze you have to drink - thought that was understood.

― Oilyrags, Saturday, 7 April 2007 00:07 (nineteen years ago)

Totally understood; just saying, if you sell it, you're getting it yourself at a lower cost, plus you have to drink a good variety to be knowledgeable for your customers. (I am the daughter of liquor store owners, so am somewhat familiar with this.)

― Sara R-C, Saturday, 7 April 2007 01:26 (nineteen years ago)

> I am the daughter of liquor store owners

I'll be right over.

― Oilyrags, Saturday, 7 April 2007 01:31 (nineteen years ago)

I'd wait until it gets warmer in Minnesota myself.

(Also must warn of potential confusion resulting from you sharing my husband's first name, but whatev.)

My final thought: you need a house to house your booze.

― Sara R-C, Saturday, 7 April 2007 01:41 (nineteen years ago)

Nah - I'm thinking of a system where you get a UPC barcode tattoo and can go into any bar or package store and get it scanned and they just let you treat yourself with whatever strikes your fancy, to be paid for by - I dunno - the Emperor of Cambodia or someone. Then you can take it back to your comfortable little nook by the underpass and enjoy it in splendid, if somewhat carbon-monoixide intensive privacy...

― Oilyrags, Saturday, 7 April 2007 01:46 (nineteen years ago)

Yeah, I'm a romantic.

― Oilyrags, Saturday, 7 April 2007 01:48 (nineteen years ago)

Lord Byron had nothing on you.

― Sara R-C, Saturday, 7 April 2007 03:17 (nineteen years ago)

im sad my fuck, marry, thread never took off :(

― chaki, Saturday, 7 April 2007 03:25 (nineteen years ago)

the blowjob/blowtorch question has been bugging me all weekend.

― the next grozart, Tuesday, 10 April 2007 00:09 (nineteen years ago)

the one i've always heard... would you rather:

a) shit out of your mouth

or

b) sweat mayonaise

?
m.

― msp, Tuesday, 10 April 2007 00:53 (nineteen years ago)

if I shat out of my mouth, at least my ass would be clean

― bernard snowy, Tuesday, 10 April 2007 02:34 (nineteen years ago)

Only Lemmy was saving this thread... and now he's gone.

― Andi Mags, Tuesday, 10 April 2007 03:12 (nineteen years ago)

you've ALWAYS heard that? what the hell kind of friends do you have?

― the schef (adam schefter ha ha), Tuesday, 10 April 2007 03:16 (nineteen years ago)

five years pass...

WWYR:

1. Eat a small, tough-skinned tomato that doesn't taste quite right.
2. Go and see Just Jack in concert.
3. Bang your hand on a hard surface on a cold winter's day.

― Scary Move 4 (dog latin), Wednesday, 11 April 2012 14:44 (fourteen years ago)

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