Pick a better species than humans

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Human beings, as a whole, tend to suck. Who's better?

Poll Results

Option	Votes
Otters	17
Cats	8
Bucket-coveting large sea mammals	7
None of the Above (please write in your own answer in #2 pencil)	5
Robots	5
Rabbits who nick your cookies	4
All of the Above	4
Whatever the fuck ALF was	4
Giant Squid	4
Wookies	3
Dogs	3
Twi-lek strippers	2
Black widow spiders (comedy Alice Cooper option)	0

― kingfish, Monday, 23 April 2007 19:36 (eighteen years ago)

(please note that giant, city-destroying robots and giant, city-saving robots created by rogue scientists right before they die in tragic accidents fall into the robots category)

― kingfish, Monday, 23 April 2007 19:39 (eighteen years ago)

Glad to see otters getting repped on this thread.

― Will M., Monday, 23 April 2007 19:40 (eighteen years ago)

I much prefer non-bucket-coveting sea mammals to the bucket-coveting ones, but I picked giant squid because I don't have a #2 pencil

― Hurting 2, Monday, 23 April 2007 19:42 (eighteen years ago)

We only animals?

I choose lichens. Wait, except those are basically two species mushed into one synthetic organism, aren't they. Well, that's why, then!

― Oilyrags, Monday, 23 April 2007 19:55 (eighteen years ago)

i picked giant squid because one day they will rule us all

― get bent, Monday, 23 April 2007 19:57 (eighteen years ago)

Otters for sure.

― Rock Hardy, Monday, 23 April 2007 19:58 (eighteen years ago)

Banana Dogz

{image][Removed Illegal Link]

― Mr. Que, Monday, 23 April 2007 19:59 (eighteen years ago)

http://icanhascheezburger.files.wordpress.com/2007/04/uprgaded_ur_banazaz.jpg

― Mr. Que, Monday, 23 April 2007 19:59 (eighteen years ago)

Correction: bananZa dogz

― nabisco, Monday, 23 April 2007 20:02 (eighteen years ago)

(Ha, I only just noticed that, and now I'm curious whether it's deliberately implying a ChiquitaPup BONANAZA or what.)

― nabisco, Monday, 23 April 2007 20:02 (eighteen years ago)

oh right. i was so busy fucking up the image in my first post, i forgot to name the pups correctly. still, they rule my world.

― Mr. Que, Monday, 23 April 2007 20:04 (eighteen years ago)

im extraordinarily embarrassed to know what a twi-lek is but im glad my mind had never previously been able to conceive of one stripping

― deeznuts, Monday, 23 April 2007 20:08 (eighteen years ago)

Play one of the KotOR games, they show up frequently

― kingfish, Monday, 23 April 2007 20:13 (eighteen years ago)

Giraffes

― franny glass, Monday, 23 April 2007 20:21 (eighteen years ago)

oh wait i change my vote to giraffes!

― Mr. Que, Monday, 23 April 2007 20:23 (eighteen years ago)

Is "robot" technically a species?

― nickalicious, Monday, 23 April 2007 20:27 (eighteen years ago)

haha ive actually wanted to for awhile kf but i gave up gaming, cept for like madden + nascar (note that i despise nascar as a 'sport', or even for existing, but the entire purpose of videogames is to make horrible things fun) when i am forced into being sociable

btw im seriously not a star wars nerd ok

― deeznuts, Monday, 23 April 2007 20:27 (eighteen years ago)

Bonobos

― Michael White, Monday, 23 April 2007 20:31 (eighteen years ago)

ALF was from planet Melmac, don't know what his species was called though.

― Tuomas, Monday, 23 April 2007 20:42 (eighteen years ago)

DAMMIT, i forgot to add "Orangutans" and "Chimps wearing top hats" to the poll!

I knew I was missing something.

― kingfish, Monday, 23 April 2007 20:54 (eighteen years ago)

Orangutans. No contest.

― ENBB, Monday, 23 April 2007 20:57 (eighteen years ago)

I would've voted for orangutans, they're my favorite species.

― Tuomas, Monday, 23 April 2007 21:00 (eighteen years ago)

Polar bears or nothing!

― Jibe, Monday, 23 April 2007 21:01 (eighteen years ago)

My vote is for octopi, but I picked giant squid because they're closest.

Seriously until humans can do this the only opinions on this issue that I care about are being typed with eight arms.

― 31g, Monday, 23 April 2007 21:40 (eighteen years ago)

Suffice it to say, doing a GIS for chimps in top hats gives you some real wtf results

― kingfish, Monday, 23 April 2007 21:56 (eighteen years ago)

LA CUCARACHA

― nickalicious, Monday, 23 April 2007 21:56 (eighteen years ago)

One day it will be the only species.

― nickalicious, Monday, 23 April 2007 21:56 (eighteen years ago)

NO ZERG NO CREDIBILITY

― max, Monday, 23 April 2007 22:36 (eighteen years ago)

do cosplaying night elves fit into that category, too?

― kingfish, Monday, 23 April 2007 22:38 (eighteen years ago)

If dogs ran ILX, you wouldn't have to log in every 30 minutes.

― M.V., Monday, 23 April 2007 22:47 (eighteen years ago)

Yeah, but the "It's April, 2007. What do you smell like?" thread would be a little hard to get used to, methinks.

― Michael White, Monday, 23 April 2007 22:50 (eighteen years ago)

PENGUINS

― lex pretend, Monday, 23 April 2007 23:10 (eighteen years ago)

Humans are easily my favourite species.
Others seem not very intelligent.
Plus, I'm sympathetic to humans having to try and deal with morality.

― peepee, Tuesday, 24 April 2007 01:20 (eighteen years ago)

The ONLY primates that MIGHT be considered are pro-simians. The bushbaby and lemurs pwn the man; chimps, mandrills, baboons, orangutans, gibbons & ALL OTHERS are stupid dickx.

I think RACCOONS have the advantage for mammalian king if humans go away.

However, I think almost all birds (non-ratite) are superior to the human---evolutionarily, at any rate. Their 3-chambered hearts are part of a superior circulatory system. They have completely STREAMLINED all the useless viscera---one ovary, one teste. Think, guys, GRACKLES have it more together than we do.

― Abbott, Tuesday, 24 April 2007 04:00 (eighteen years ago)

http://wat.midco.net/jvipond/images/TiffBrissette.gif

― dice in my pockets, Tuesday, 24 April 2007 05:32 (eighteen years ago)

NOT alf

― negotiable, Tuesday, 24 April 2007 06:02 (eighteen years ago)

Bucket! Bucket!

― accentmonkey, Tuesday, 24 April 2007 07:05 (eighteen years ago)

bees

― emsk, Tuesday, 24 April 2007 07:53 (eighteen years ago)

Any species that doesn't have religion > humanz.

― StanM, Tuesday, 24 April 2007 07:54 (eighteen years ago)

poopeaters > poop

― tremendoid, Tuesday, 24 April 2007 08:04 (eighteen years ago)

Dumbo Octopus will rule us all

http://img01.picoodle.com/img/img01/8/4/23/f_dumbom_4ce5e25.jpg

― Ed, Tuesday, 24 April 2007 08:18 (eighteen years ago)

Lex OTM

― braveclub, Tuesday, 24 April 2007 09:21 (eighteen years ago)

Pikachu octopus scares me, but I voted squid anyway. Cthulhu is master of us all.

― Masonic Boom, Tuesday, 24 April 2007 11:40 (eighteen years ago)

i chose cats

― g-kit, Tuesday, 24 April 2007 12:05 (eighteen years ago)

polar bears not on list ;_;

― g-kit, Tuesday, 24 April 2007 12:05 (eighteen years ago)

vote owl - they're a hoot

― Alan, Tuesday, 24 April 2007 12:08 (eighteen years ago)

Moderators.

― StanM, Tuesday, 24 April 2007 12:15 (eighteen years ago)

it says "better"

― g-kit, Tuesday, 24 April 2007 12:18 (eighteen years ago)

Shhh!

― StanM, Tuesday, 24 April 2007 12:27 (eighteen years ago)

PENGUINS YO...

and Alf

plus...shout out to dolphins

― Colin_C., Wednesday, 25 April 2007 02:51 (eighteen years ago)

Surely Otters will survive us all!

― mercurialblonde, Wednesday, 25 April 2007 05:18 (eighteen years ago)

Does it have to be a species? Because I think arthropods have the totally right idea.

― kenan, Wednesday, 25 April 2007 05:31 (eighteen years ago)

abbott, such a geek! why does i only like girls who are on the internet or wearing mcdonalds visors

― deeznuts, Wednesday, 25 April 2007 05:33 (eighteen years ago)

you know i know i said zerg but after playing for the zerg campaign im thinking maybe 'toss are actually better than humans?

― max, Wednesday, 25 April 2007 05:35 (eighteen years ago)

Barnacles have the longest penis in the animal kingdom, in proportion to their body length.

Cymothoa exigua is a parasitic crustacean of the family Cymothoidae. This parasite attaches itself at the base of the spotted rosesnapper fish's tongue with the claws on its front three pairs of legs, and extracts blood from the tongue of its host fish. As the parasite grows, less and less blood is able to reach the tongue, and eventually the organ atrophies from lack of blood. The parasite then replaces the fish's tongue with its own body, by attaching to the muscles of the tongue stub. The fish is able to use the parasite just like a normal tongue, except that it has to share its food with the parasite.

― Leee, Wednesday, 25 April 2007 18:54 (eighteen years ago)

Parasites don't count.

― kingfish, Wednesday, 25 April 2007 20:03 (eighteen years ago)

WTF was ALF then?

― Leee, Wednesday, 25 April 2007 20:06 (eighteen years ago)

puppet

― Mr. Que, Wednesday, 25 April 2007 20:07 (eighteen years ago)

Lovable salesman of long-distance-services and late night talk show host, of course.

xp

― kingfish, Wednesday, 25 April 2007 20:07 (eighteen years ago)

furry midget

xxp

― StanM, Wednesday, 25 April 2007 20:09 (eighteen years ago)

ALF lived off of the Tanners and their ~~cats~~ food; dare I ask what benefit ALF provided his hosts? I assert: naught!

― Leee, Wednesday, 25 April 2007 20:28 (eighteen years ago)

And the results are in!

Otters by a 2-to-1 margin! Cats have defeated the bucket-havers, giant squid, AND the cookie-nicking bunny rabbits!

http://otter.covblogs.com/archives/images/Otter%20with%20beer.jpg

http://www.ilmot.co.uk/Otter.jpg

http://www.sacbrew.com/images/beers/bottles/river_otter_ale.jpg

― kingfish, Monday, 30 April 2007 20:50 (eighteen years ago)

typical

― Mr. Que, Monday, 30 April 2007 20:51 (eighteen years ago)

awes

― ghost rider, Monday, 30 April 2007 20:52 (eighteen years ago)

Leeeeeee is RIGHT, Alf didn't even ATTEMPT to be a symbiote, bastardly cat-eating bastard.

― Abbott, Monday, 30 April 2007 21:10 (eighteen years ago)

who the hell voted for rabbits that nick your cookies? are you four all on diets or something? cos fuck that rabbit seriously.

― the schef (adam schefter ha ha), Monday, 30 April 2007 21:20 (eighteen years ago)

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