A dog is for life, not just for . . .

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1. curries.
2. target practise.
3. a romantic weekend away
4. HUGGLEZ

The Wayward Johnny B, Thursday, 26 April 2007 13:25 (eighteen years ago)

Is this supposed to be a poll?

Ms Misery, Thursday, 26 April 2007 13:27 (eighteen years ago)

No, just a time-wasting list thread. Feel free to flame.

The Wayward Johnny B, Thursday, 26 April 2007 13:28 (eighteen years ago)

Dogs are for companionship, motivation to exercise, and picking up chicks.

Oilyrags, Thursday, 26 April 2007 13:28 (eighteen years ago)

I like dogs. I was just going to tell you you made a poll wrong. :)

5. vacuuming the floor

Ms Misery, Thursday, 26 April 2007 13:29 (eighteen years ago)

6 a position

nathalie, Thursday, 26 April 2007 13:34 (eighteen years ago)

7. keeping beds and sofas well stocked with ticks.

Beth Parker, Thursday, 26 April 2007 13:34 (eighteen years ago)

8. Standing on the sofa looking out the window and barking at people if they spend too long in front of your house.

The Real Dirty Vicar, Thursday, 26 April 2007 14:19 (eighteen years ago)

9. foosball

HI DERE, Thursday, 26 April 2007 14:19 (eighteen years ago)

10. looking stupid at crufts

The Wayward Johnny B, Thursday, 26 April 2007 14:30 (eighteen years ago)

11. chasing cars

Grandpont Genie, Thursday, 26 April 2007 14:30 (eighteen years ago)

12. Today, dogs are for having a reason to mop up piss.

But I saw the future and thought she'd do that last night, so I closed my office and got my wife to close her study, so the dog wouldn't have access to any carpeted areas to piss on.

Rock Hardy, Thursday, 26 April 2007 14:37 (eighteen years ago)

13. pissing on your modem and rendering it usless. :(

Ms Misery, Thursday, 26 April 2007 14:38 (eighteen years ago)

14. stealing toys from children.

braveclub, Thursday, 26 April 2007 17:49 (eighteen years ago)

15. hornking potato chips off your plate when you're not looking

kingfish, Thursday, 26 April 2007 17:50 (eighteen years ago)

16. Barking at bucket-coveting large sea mammals.

Aimless, Thursday, 26 April 2007 17:51 (eighteen years ago)

17. getting dressed up in amusing costumes, then photographed and published in calendars, the internet, motivational posters, etc

kingfish, Thursday, 26 April 2007 17:52 (eighteen years ago)

18. nosing thru the laundry basket until they find your underwear, finding you, then waiting for you to notice and give chase

kingfish, Thursday, 26 April 2007 17:53 (eighteen years ago)

19. forcing lazy people to go out for a walk.

braveclub, Thursday, 26 April 2007 17:53 (eighteen years ago)

20. eating video game controllers and/or wires for video game controllers

21. munching on star wars figures on christmas morning

kingfish, Thursday, 26 April 2007 17:53 (eighteen years ago)

22. Finding out which of your guests and family members are menstruating.

Abbott, Thursday, 26 April 2007 17:59 (eighteen years ago)

23. Coating verything you own with layers of oppositely-colored hairs. Oh you MAMMALS!

Abbott, Thursday, 26 April 2007 18:00 (eighteen years ago)

24. finding where the rabbits/voles is hiding, in the backyard, under the deck, in the couch, etc

kingfish, Thursday, 26 April 2007 18:01 (eighteen years ago)

25. Conducting deeply unsavoury genetic experiments upon in a lab deep beneath Wiltshire.

chap, Thursday, 26 April 2007 18:01 (eighteen years ago)

26. filling your life with drool and/or comedy when their floppy ears are so long that they step on them when running, then tumble over.

then repeat.

kingfish, Thursday, 26 April 2007 18:02 (eighteen years ago)

27. fulfilling any irrational biological need you have for children, but giving you another mouth to feed that is loud, messy, and drools

but you get to overindulge them at your whim

kingfish, Thursday, 26 April 2007 18:04 (eighteen years ago)

Plus most kidds do not have comical foot-long flopears.

Abbott, Thursday, 26 April 2007 18:06 (eighteen years ago)

by foot-long I mean, long enough to reach foot of child.

Abbott, Thursday, 26 April 2007 18:06 (eighteen years ago)

28. identifying which passerby is a zombie, terminator, or replicant(barks uncontrollably, strains against leash) and which is the protagonist(immediately stops barking and wags tail when hand of protagonist reaches out to pet him)

kingfish, Thursday, 26 April 2007 18:07 (eighteen years ago)

29. Sacrificing to an elder god with no vowels in Its name.

chap, Thursday, 26 April 2007 18:08 (eighteen years ago)

30. providing a lovable sidekick/mascot to the rednecky character

kingfish, Thursday, 26 April 2007 18:10 (eighteen years ago)

31) hunting robots.

M.V., Thursday, 26 April 2007 18:11 (eighteen years ago)

32. warning the disposable character in the first reel of the film that the monster is about to eat him, and to get ignored by said disposable character as they walk thru the woods

kingfish, Thursday, 26 April 2007 18:13 (eighteen years ago)

33. breakfast

Roberto Spiralli, Thursday, 26 April 2007 18:14 (eighteen years ago)

34. having over for breakfast, then munching any breakfast accidentally dropped on the floor

kingfish, Thursday, 26 April 2007 18:15 (eighteen years ago)

35. Pitting against rabid monkeys in the back rooms of pubs.

chap, Thursday, 26 April 2007 18:15 (eighteen years ago)

I don't have a sense of smell, but my half-bassett sure does, so I was thinking 'oh he could be my smelling-nose dog', so to speak.' Then i realize this would only be useful if I needed to find out where other dogs had peed or if I needed to find bits of sandwiches and chips under the grass in parks.

Abbott, Thursday, 26 April 2007 18:17 (eighteen years ago)

oh he could be my smelling-nose dog'

my fave term for this is "smell-hound"*, first used on the Simpsons ep where Sideshow Bob meets his brother.

*alternate suggestion: "snout-hound"

kingfish, Thursday, 26 April 2007 18:18 (eighteen years ago)

or just 'service dog." I thought it would be awesome if I could also train him to run roulette tables.

Abbott, Thursday, 26 April 2007 18:19 (eighteen years ago)

36. Providing a relatively harmless masturbatory room-sharing alternative to a baby.

en i see kay, Thursday, 26 April 2007 21:30 (eighteen years ago)

I thought it would be awesome if I could also train him to run roulette tables.

Don't be so sure you can't:

http://img168.imageshack.us/img168/3104/pic49786lgfj0.jpg

kingfish, Thursday, 26 April 2007 21:42 (eighteen years ago)

see also:

http://images.boardgamegeek.com/images/pic49072_md.jpg

kingfish, Thursday, 26 April 2007 21:45 (eighteen years ago)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=QlHBN3RHl4I

g®▲Ðұ, Thursday, 26 April 2007 21:45 (eighteen years ago)


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