Help me figure out who this author is!

Smart-mouthed, no-tipping douchebag.

He's not a big shot and you haven't heard of, far less enjoyed any of his books.

No tipping at a nice restaraunt? I think that the "vague respect for his privacy" is out the window. Piss in his drinks.

well, crap tipping. $4 on $42 last time he was in.

Rushdie

fuck that shit. as for his privacy I say invade away

http://i.a.cnn.net/si/2007/writers/richard_deitsch/01/25/qa.mandel/mandel1.jpg

$4 on $42 is 10%, which means, "I think yr service kinda sux", but isn't out of the realm of acceptability. I tip 15% if it's average, 20% if it's good service, and never under 10% unless they spill something on me. (That's happened, actually, and I got $300 from the restaraunt for my ruined jacket.)

Based on the Haley comparison, my first thoughts were Jonathan Ames or Donald Antrim -- but Ames is too young, and Antrim usually has both head-hair and facial hair.

Oh good another tipping thread.

HEY GUYS LET'S HAVE ANOTHER TIPPING THREAD

haha xpost

Uh oh.

XPOSTY

I can't quite bring myself to do this work for you, but if you're just DYING to know, you might try checking Amazon for the acknowledgements in Hempel's books -- or reading some interviews to see whose circles she runs in -- and image-searching likely candidates.

-Bald
-Mid- to Late 40s.
-Glasses

Now, importantly, were the glasses ad-agency hip and rectangular or college-prof nebbish?

If it was Rooshdie, wouldn't poortheatre have recognized the lady with him?

http://www.econoculture.com/images/leavitt_250x338.jpg

Was it David Leavitt?

I'm trying to think of other novelists who were in their 20s in the mid/late 1980s, Paris Review and/or Gordon Lish circles.

If it was Rooshdie, wouldn't poortheatre have recognized the lady with him?

they broke up

but he usually has facial hair anyway

This is actually kinda bugging ME now. The best answer I can come up with is "Rick Moody with cancer."

Haha also someone's blog claims that Moody is "hot in an arrogant-Michael Stipe kind of way," and at least STIPE looks like Jackie Earle Haley!

"Rick Moody with cancer."

Haha, or "Sickly Junot Diaz"

http://www.mehrzweckbeutel.de/staubsauger/images/beutelbilder/TC_Boyle_03_420.jpg

Maybe TC Boyle has shaved his head?

Chuck Palahnuik? Perhaps too hairy though...

Mark Leyner?

http://msnbcmedia4.msn.com/j/msnbc/Sections/Health/_Health%20Columns/BodyOdd/060731_goldberg_leyner_bcol.hmedium.jpg

On the left.

My first thought was Palahniuk but he's totally not bald or vegan.

mark leyner lives in CA, doesn't he?

Or from New York, or a glasses-wearer, or yogic in demeanor, or looking like Jackie Earle Haley!

clearly the answer is "Ben Kingsley pretending to be a novelist"

that guy sure can act

Indeed. His best moment was his NSFW line from Sexy Beast.

they broke up
So they did. Where was the thread on that?

Mark Leyner is a great tipper. I thought he still lived in 'Boken though.

Can you upload us some footage from the restaurant's security camera, or just surreptitiously photograph the guy?

rick moody!

http://www.thirdcoastfestival.org/images/moody.jpg

Some douche that none of us have heard of

Don't see it (xpost)

This article makes me think it's Moody:

Today Moody radiates healthfulness. A vegetarian, he appears fit and lean in his plain brown sweater, tight black jeans and high-top sneakers. He has shed his turbulent locks and his black-framed glasses, and as a result seems open and vulnerable where once he looked guarded and abstract.

i so so so so so so so so want it to be Moody

Although I skimmed that and didn't notice that it says he no longer wears glasses.

does mystery guy drink? you should card him. "sorry but the liquor board is being really strict now ..."

Rick Moody, in another interview:

RM: It’s a hassle. I don’t want to be told to fix things at that point and yet I need to be told. There are a couple of people I really like. The short story writer Any Hempel is a good friend of mine and I always show her stuff because she has got a perfect ear. So if there is a sentence that’s awkward, you are going to know about it.

That's why I suggested Moody-with-cancer in the first place -- he and Hempel are totally tight. He prefaced her collected stories, too.

yeah it was the Hempel connection that sealed the deal for me.

although i would be less excited if it was Antrim after all

moody was not nice to me when we met

details, remy!

I think I met Antrim and talked to him on the phone once, he seemed perfectly nice.

he was not nearly as much of a flagrant dick as coetzee though

j.m. goatse

lolz

former jbr screen name (credit where it's due)

coetzee seems like he'd be a dick, though.

<literary gossip queen>

Are you the guy who took all the rejected jbr screennames and put them over here?

I thought rick moody was all over radio these days for some reason.

he does radio stuff, plays and that sort of thing i think.

I think he helped write a pop song as well for the third coast festival.

yeah he's in a band, too. if it ends up being him, i'm throwing everyone on ilx a party at my house.

he was not nearly as much of a flagrant dick as coetzee though

Coetzee is the flagrantest dick. At the same time, some of it must just be South African formal manners. Derek Walcott's the same way, and I forgave it a bit as a cultural thing. (Both spent a day or two at my college, so I ended up at some meals with them.)

Derek Walcott=not from South Africa

I know, I know -- I just meant that they both have an ultraformal and blunt style that I think of as British Colonial.

http://subdivided_we_stand.typepad.com/photos/uncategorized/shirl_1.jpg

http://nobelprize.org/nobel_prizes/literature/laureates/2003/coetzee.jpg
http://3quarksdaily.blogs.com/photos/uncategorized/walcott2.jpg

That was fun. When can we do it again?

(Also, I really enjoyed the late arrival of the Shirley Hemphill pic)

man that's really disappointing to hear that moody only tips 10%. motherfucker is wealthy.

moody was a dick to me when i met him too. gave a little lecture to a class once, was pompous as all hell. and to boot, he's not as good a writer as my prof is (imho), so that sealed the deal.

btw prof is Dan Chaon. also my advisor. he sends me mp3s of songs he likes once in a while great guy.

Moody was not a dick to me when I met him, but it was at a poetry reading and whatever he read was totally boring. Which is SORTA like being a dick to me.

Ha, table is rapidly becoming the official name-dropper of NYC lit.

I WANTED THAT SPOT

I don't remember Moody being dickish when I had drinks with him.

Although we were all drinking in a pub in London, so tipping was a non-issue, haha.

nabisco, did you ever finish reading all those Dalkey Archive books?

Wait, do we have Moody confirmation?

that he's a dick? ever read one of his books?

btw prof is Dan Chaon.

He is a really good writer.

I went up to Northwestern a few years ago to hear him give a reading. He read a story about killing a dog, if I remember right.

Wait, which Dalkey books? The list of Dalkey books I have read is short and plagued by abadonment:

At Swim-Two-Birds - Flann O'Brien
Cigarettes - Harry Mathews
Lucy Church Amiably - Gertrude Stein (INCOMPLETE)
Pierrot Mon Ami - Raymond Queneau
Sabbatical: A Romance - John Barth
The Age of Wire and String - Ben Marcus
The Barnum Museum - Steven Millhauser
The Conversions - Harry Mathews
The Great Fire of London: A Story With Interpolations and Bifurcations - Jacques Roubaud (INCOMPLETE)
The Last Days - Raymond Queneau
The Sinking of the Odradek Stadium - Harry Mathews (*)
The Third Policeman - Flann O'Brien
Wittgenstein's Mistress - David Markson

(* = this totally would have been an incomplete if it weren't the second-to-last book left unread during a 15-hour flight back from east Africa, or if Vanity Fair sucked even slightly less)

Some similar footnote should go for The Conversions too, actually, but for some reason Mathews is one of few writers I will keep soldiering on with even when I'm totally mystified and not getting much out of it.

http://domainamerica.net/Winget/Photos2006/pictures/maroon-squat.jpg

bump

Wait, do we have Moody confirmation?
Wait, do we have Moody confirmation?
Wait, do we have Moody confirmation?

inquiring minds want to know