PHYS!CaL PH!TNeSS TH2 PHaY WaY (WaRNiNG THiZ WiLL BoRe U RiGiD FuX0Rz)

Well, I got sick ov being a lard ass, so this year I decided to get a little less sedentary, lifestyle-wise. Influenced by a fellow on a mail list i'm subbed to's sage dietary advice to us all ("do some more exercise and quit eating like a motherf*cking pig" was how he put it IIRC. Unarguably true.) I have started to cycle home from work twice a week as often as I can. This is not quite the simple thing it may appear - I live 20 miles away from work, which isn't too bad, but going home, a lot of it is uphill. The last 3 miles or so are especially steep. So, I've eased myself in by using the Brompton folding bike (disclaimer - I run a bike shop & sell these things. They rule). I cycle to thee local grim shopping mall "Gateshead Metro Centre", which is a local transport hub, fold up the bike, and get the bus from there. Work to the metrocentre is abt 13 miles, so that's 26 miles a week I've been doing. I need to get used to getting my lazy ass out ov bed early enough to do thee return journey as well. That's mainly downhill, of course, so it should be quix0r & much easier. I can get to Newcastle Central Station in abt 1hr, or do the whole journey in abt 2 1/2. Last week, I pedalled an extra 3 miles homewards before I got the bus, so I'm building the distance up.

So far it's been pretty good - the route is mostly along the south bank of the river Tyne, so there are lots of interesting things to see (charvers, syringes, puddles ov vom!t etc), and a lot of it is on cycle paths (NE England is very good w/these - you can get almost anywhere w/o going on major roads). Some ov the route is through industrial estates, which are very quiet & mainly traffic-free by the time I get there. Pedalling thru an empty industrial estate at 6.30 PM can be quite thee experience ov Ballard-ism, I can tell you ;) Generally (if it's not too windy) it's taking me just under 1 1/2 hrs to get to thee mall. A couple of weeks ago, there was a really bad windy day (lots of gable ends blown down, traffic signs blown over, a ship blew free of its moorings and so on) and it took me 3 hours then, nevertheless it was really enjoyable - the best bits being pedalling past a huge 3-4 mile Q of stationary traffick because of many of the tyne bridges being closed, and coming across this enormous tree that had blown over across the path. The couple ov times I've been unable to do it (either really bad rain or once rescheduled band practice) it's pissed me off mightily, so I'm feeling pretty keen & pleased w/progress. I am noticing slight some improvement as far as phitness goes as well. There appears to be a muscle wall forming under my gut, which is good, I think, and it's getting easier and less stressful generally. Also, my breathing is getting better. I don't seem to be getting much smaller yet though. Oh well, (sigh) we'll see how I get on with that by summertime. Ideally I could do with dropping 2-3 stones. My long term plan is to get used to doing the whole distance regularly, there and back (total distance abt 84 miles a week, prob abt 10 hrs per week travelling/exercise time in total) and then get a 2-wheel recumbent (I really like "tadpole" recumbent tricycles like the Greenspeed or the Trice, but I haven't room to store one, and they're a bit low on the road, thus not too visible to some drivers. It would be just my luck to get squashed by the CuSToMeR FRoM HeLL [who ! w!ll tell U all abt another time] in his big fancy silver Benz). I'm keen on the Pashley PDQ:

http://www.pashley.co.uk

or one of Optima's range:

http://optima-cycles.nl

@ the moment (their "lynx" model looks rather nice I think) - another advantage here of course is that I can use the thing as a demonstrator in the shop, and maybe sell a couple. It's a lot easier & better to sell things if U use & like them yourself. If I do get on with this thing, I might save up and fit a Rohloff Speedhub to it - this is a Geman 14-speed internal gear hub, which covers the whole range of a big derailleur gear set, but w/o any duplicate gears, and much more reliable and long lasting as well. We fitted a speedhub to a customers tandem last year, and it proved itself really well. So far the experience of cycling this distance has actually been very enjoyable. In recent years, I've found myself in a generally stressful situation, with little/no peace of mind. Quite often, when I do find myself in a peaceful place, I find that I have this roaring white noise in my head, and I can neither think straight or deeply/analytically. It = k-sux0r. Now, when I'm out on the bike the exercise seems to clear my thoughts and I get into a state of total peace of mind for a while. Obviously, this is really good, and is probably the main reason why I've kept doing it. Anyway, this has been my "big thing" so far this year, who gives a fux0r. If anyone fancies doing this themselves, I can recommend it quite highly. I would say s.th. about wishing I'd done it earlier, but it's only now that I feel the need to do this. Up to now, I've really been an occasional cyclist, and my big interest has been in fixing them. I love fixing bikes. Oh, of course it saves money as well - my combined public transport fare for a day is UKP3.80 - multiply that by 2 for twice a week and then by 52 and you get just over 395 uk pounds in a year, which is about 1/2 the price ov the bike. Not bad, eh?

PH34_R |\/|Y |\/|!GHTY S!|\|3\/\/Y |\/|USKUL/-\R L3GZ |=UX0RZ!@#!@#!@~!@##~