which characteristic you really can't stand in other people?

sense of entitlement

chaki 100% OTM

though everyone does it

Sense of entitlement covers it, I think - small things like getting up from a restaurant table and not pushing your chair in, or making a huge mess and leaving it, or driving down a closed/merging lane until the very last possible second and cutting someone off, etc..

hypocrisy and thinking the world revolves around them.

selflessness

squeamishness abouut cinematic violence.

and the inability to spell the word "about."

also, fondness for Garrison Keillor.

I could go on and on. There are so many things I can't stand about other people.

People who don't like dogs are no good.

adamrl, she's looking at you.

people who don't like cats. actually, no, i don't mind if people "don't like" cats. people who actively hate cats and feel the need to mention that every five minutes, fuck them.

No! Don't fuck them! They must be BRED OUT of the population.

People (alway guys) who frisbee their credit cards across the counter at the cashier, or snap it loudly onto the counter with their thumbs.
Also, old ladies who take a really long time counting out exact change should be euthanised.
And women who leave their grocery carts parked slantwise in the middle of the aisle, blocking all traffic.
Kill them all.

people HATE entitlement - i totally understand but it's weird it's not something i think about, or notice right away.

for me it's definitely DELUSIONAL SELF-WORTH. u know, the ppl who clearly think they're the cream of the crop, but really they're the crap of creation. b/c i can deal with cockiness, as long as u have something to be cocky about. it's those ppl who think they're just SO COOOOOOOOOOOL and just aren't, that drive me crazy.

sorry i think the caps kick in after a cocktail.

Give us some specifics of these coolmeisters.

you must direct your hate like a laser.

As Holden Caulfield would say, Phoniness.

Is this where we start naming ILXors by name? I thought about it, but maybe I better not. (xpost)

hypersensitive p.c. types. which is just the long way to say hypocrites.

when people dont stop freaking talking, especially about themselves
there are too many people that do not understand the value of shutting the fuck up

people that enjoy the band 'the mars volta'

people who lack any degree of introspection (although i also dislike introspection when it's taken to the level of narcissism).

i love their first album, suck my dick.

xpost

people who get defensive about the music they like

juuuuuuuuuuuuuust kidding

mostly

people that judge others based on a band they like.

Overabundant self-importance.

willful stupidity

People who lie because they're too wussy to face anything difficult. Give me painful honesty over "nice" deception any day, thanks. Least then you know where you stand.

overabundant self importance seconded

coolmeisters: the gay boyz at the trendy bar, the bouncers there and the imagemonster in general.

Image - i hate when ppl are so vain they can barely see anything else. Cuz at the end of it the image is probably the least intriguing part.

shallowness. But I define that in so many different ways, it's not really helpful. But I know it when I see it. Lack of character, lack of intellect, lack of trying. Those all bug me a whole lot. Sometimes I meet people who have all three problems, which make overlooking any one of them so much harder.

Otherwise, you know... it's easy to see some of myself in any of those characteristics.

The way you can see some of yourself in George Costanza or Homer Simpson.

People who go out of their way to find something objectionable about others.

complainers!

hearing john say "overabundant self-importance" makes me think of the soul asylum guy

"uhh, do you need some strings or something?"

Hate in folks who have no concept of their own flaws.

complainers otm

also people who are extremely picky about things that matter very little

also people who aren't picky at all about things that matter a lot

folks who have no concept of their own flaws.

an adjunct to that: people who will never ever take a hint. And have such a disposition that you can tell they never WILL take a hint. Or change. Or try to.

hearing john say "overabundant self-importance" makes me think of the soul asylum guy

"uhh, do you need some strings or something?"

-- the sir weeze, Tuesday, August 7, 2007 2:18 AM (15 minutes ago)

GREAT MOMENTS IN SURLY CUSTOMER SERVICE - GUITAR SHOP EDITION.

people who aren't picky at all about things that matter a lot

I dunno... music matters a lot to me, and movies, but to deal with most people, you have to throw that out the window. That can't bug you A LOT or you'll be bothered by pretty much everyone.

If I were perfect, in my own estimation, the flaws of others would never bother me. I mean, in the end, that annoyance hurts only the annoyee, not the thistle in the panties. I'm not, of course, so plenty of things others do bug me.

xpost Unless you mean life-or-death matters, which I just don't talk about with coworkers or casual acquaintances.

those people that give you the runaround when you ask your opinion, and then when you give yours are all "OMG TOTALLY, me too!!!!" and who just agree with you about everything

Me too!

groan

(plz notice I also excelsiored that exchange.)

i don't like it when people take pride in never regretting anything; some things in life are regrettable. also, claiming that it is better to regret something you have done, than something you haven't, doesn't recognise that some things are best not done because the cost (to self and/or others) is too high.

-- estela, Tuesday, August 7, 2007 11:59 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Link

Agreed. Regret is part of being human. So are foresight and hindsight.

conformity, i don't like.

it bugs me when people (usually youngish girls, by which I mean under 30) feign a carefree, uninhibited manner and do things like start to do the hoky-poky when they know a boy is watching -- or just that anybody is watching. Acting in a way that says, "look at me; i'm cute" and you can tell that the person is watching themselves and wanting to be watched. Like many things that bug me, I think I used to do this.

I am bugged by those who talk and act as if they care the most about "tolerance" but think that primetime TV-watchers are brainwashed idiots and that basically everybody who doesn't mirror their habits are idiots. They have clearly defined ideas about high and low art/culture but would never confess to being snobs. Whatever they read or watch has to have a social message or lesson. These are the people who talk about how bad racism and inequality are and then make comments like, "you should just hire a Brazilian and pay them nothing to do that paintwork for you."

I am bugged by those who resent everyone else for what they have.

People who think that things are the most important, well, things, bug me. You know those people who have to have the very best set of knives even though they don't really cook or who care very very much about watches or sunglasses, who seem to fill their lives with a pursuit for products.

I don't hate any of the above, they just bug me.

I really dislike anyone in the service industry, be they a builder, plumber, waiter, taxi driver, delivery person, or anyone else who tells me outright lies about a) how much the thing they're serving me with is going to cost or b) how long it's going to take. I'm not a moron. I'd much rather somebody said "it will cost €8000 and take a month, because one of my guys is on holidays and I've got another job on at the moment, so I can't start till I finish that" than say "it'll cost €2000 and be done in a week", but then actually cost €8000 and take a month. Just like if someone loses my order or just fucks it up, I'd rather they just apologised and put it right than made up some fake kitchen fire or something.

accentmonkey v v otm!

i don't like it when people take pride in never regretting anything; some things in life are regrettable. also, claiming that it is better to regret something you have done, than something you haven't, doesn't recognise that some things are best not done because the cost (to self and/or others) is too high.

-- estela, Tuesday, August 7, 2007 11:59 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Link

Agreed. Regret is part of being human. So are foresight and hindsight.

-- Tantrum The Cat, Wednesday, August 8, 2007 4:35 AM (7 hours ago) Bookmark Link

I don't like this either. I actually have a sort of distrust for people who are cocksure of their own goodness or rightness in general.

This may be because I know I spend time feeling guilty or feeling as though I could be a better person or regretting things, but nonetheless it bugs me when others never seem to do this.

I also really don't like people who are really cock sure of weird personal prejudices. I have a friend who, if you're relating an anecdote about somebody, would say "where (in Dublin) are they from" and when you said he'd be like "ah right" and nod to himself as if that explained it.

With people like this I sort of think "what box do I go into?" since presumably some sort of prefab exists for everybody's behaviour.

It's a little like psycho-analysing people or something, like "he's from this background therefore he behaves this way" but it seems really narrow and shitty to me. I don't know if others do this but it's a trait that bugs me hugely!

i spend a lot of time feeling guilty as well, what is that about?

doesn't recognise that some things are best not done because the cost (to self and/or others) is too high.

Is this the same as regret though?

Regret: 1. to feel sorrow or remorse for (an act, fault, disappointment, etc.): He no sooner spoke than he regretted it.
2. to think of with a sense of loss

I've done plenty of things in hindsight I wish I wouldn't have. But I think regret's a useless emotion. It's like worrying about something out of your control. I look at past mistakes as lessons to be learned and move on, hopefully not to repeat them.

(when those mistakes truly hurt others, then that would be a different story)

Men who seem to think they're onstage at a comedy club and think that every single comment, question, or observation that occurs within earshot needs a comeback, remark, or putdown.

Ack, so OTM. Worse when they actually cut you off (even if you're talking to someone else) just so they can make their stupid comments.

regret is one thing, guilt and shame are another
xpost

i mean, i regret but in a 'how can i learn from that and not do something similarly ugh', as sam's said above

People who try to elicit sympathy/praise at every possible opportunity.

Overly critical people who feel like it is somehow their moral right or even duty to constantly offer unsolicited "advice" to people they may or may not even know. (And usually this advice says a great deal more about their own experiences, state of mind and faults that it ever does the person being criticised.)

But I think regret's a useless emotion. It's like worrying about something out of your control.

I think I disagree with this, but I'm not sure we're talking about the same thing. I agree that it's a waste to worry about things that are completely out of one's control, but what if it's something that would have been in my control if I'd been paying better attention? It's my experience that there are very few things that affect me personally that are completely out of my control. This makes me a control freak and a nitpicker, but I generally don't have to worry about regret, cause, at least, I took care of my end of things.

I guess that leads me to another answer to the thread question: holy fools who wander blindly through life and leave it to the anal-retentives like me to take care of the details.

For "blindly," read "blithely" if you prefer.

what if it's something that would have been in my control if I'd been paying better attention?

But again, this is in the past and you're worrying cannot change those outcomes. The best you can do is figure how you could have handled the situation better and try to apply that to the future rather than use your mental energy revisiting past mistakes.

But you have to revisit the past mistakes, at least a little bit, to understand how you could have handled the situation better! I'm not talking about wailing and hair shirts, just a pragmatic assessment as a route to improvement.

Ronan I remember you starting a thread about people who justify/explain shitty behavior by saying "well that's just how I am, I really am sorry if it ruffles any feathers".. I couldn't find it though.

I'm not talking about wailing and hair shirts, just a pragmatic assessment as a route to improvement.

I agree. It's the wailing and hairshirts I'm objecting to. ;)

people who justify/explain shitty behavior by saying "well that's just how I am, I really am sorry if it ruffles any feathers"

When I'm God, it'll be the bottom of the ocean for them.

(I'm not a hardcore comics fan but Spiderman sucked.)

"it'll cost €2000 and be done in a week", but then actually cost €8000 and take a month

Thing is, the "builders rip you off" thing is so prevalent that he has to tell you the first bit to get the job. If he told you it would cost €8000 and take a month he'd figure that you'd think he meant it would cost €32000 and take 4 months and would give the job to the lying €2000/week bastard.

My shortlist:

- lack of consideration for others, in anything
- people who don't listen and/or talk all over the top of what I'm saying
- people who think they're making arguments by repeating some shite they read in a newspaper editorial
- snobbery
- deviousness (though I'm kind of in awe of how some people pull it off - like actually being proper Bad Guys With Plans instead of muddling along)
- disingenuousness (sp?)

xpost over the top of Onimo's head: I did have a great builder once who, when I rang him, asked me who had recommended him, what job he had done for them, and how much they told me he had charged, so he could remember what their circumstances were and let me know if mine would be in any way different.

He also gave me the list of all the materials he would need and told me to order them myself, using his supplier (it wasn't that big a job) so that I wouldn't complain when I got the final bill, and so he wouldn't have to spend his time on the phone chasing supplies when he could be finishing off another job somewhere else. All I had to do was call him when the supplies arrived and he came and did the job. Bish bosh.

it bugs me when people (usually youngish girls, by which I mean under 30) feign a carefree, uninhibited manner and do things like start to do the hoky-poky when they know a boy is watching -- or just that anybody is watching. Acting in a way that says, "look at me; i'm cute" and you can tell that the person is watching themselves and wanting to be watched. Like many things that bug me, I think I used to do this.

Agh, agh, so OTM. It makes me grind my teeth now.

The main characteristic I hate in other people is lack of self-awareness, either physically e.g. they are always walking into me/knocking something over, or just saying something that is actually complete rubbish - people saying words for the sake of saying them, rather than to convey a specific meaning (see also: any commercial ever).

And people that don't pay attention. Like they're driving past a big sign that tells them where to park, and you can SEE that they haven't seen it and then they start a big conversation about where to park and it's just a big predictable waste of time.

ok i just thought of one:
people who carry giant golf umbrellas on city streets need to be rounded up and shot. no excuse for this!

Overeagerness

HI DOES PARK AND 45TH LOOK LIKE A GOLF COURSE TO YOU, U FUCK? NO? HEY ME NEITHER. xp

I've thought of another one. People who think and talk really slooooooowly, so you constantly have to slow down to their pace and you can't say anything too sharp or quick-witted because they won't pick up on it - this is esp. irritating to me as my brain is constanly racing along @ 900 mph thinking of inter-connections, puns, funnies etc. This isn't the same as being stupid. It's often found in people who smoke too much dope, in my experience. I met two people like this last night... Jesus, it's irritating.

OTM. I have a friend like this, he is a smart and funny guy but conversation with him is like pulling teeth.

You'll appreciate this Ailsa, I met the two guys in question last night at a pub quiz - you can imagine - this one guy was still talking about what size Mada-friggin-gascar is when the rest of us are ten questions further on...

"OK, so it's uh.... say 500... no... yeah 500 miles... is it square miles or uh... kilomotres... it's ummmmmm... say, 500 miles long... and uhhhhhhhhhh, what shape is it again it's ummmmmmmmm, sort of, ummmmmmmm.... sort of uhhhhhh... tear shaped isn't it... so it's 500 by..."

"OK, teams, hand your answer sheets in now..."

"...say, 200... 200 miles... so that's ummmmmmmmmm..."

OMG SYMPATHY!

humorlessness

People who like showing off how smart they are. A second relaed thing is when they think the measure of intelligence of having (or being in the process of attempting to get) a PhD, and have just never questioned this, and look down on people who have other plans.

oh yes - someone just claiming matter-of-factly they're good at this one thing ALL the time. how about actually demonstrating it instead of just celebrating it?

emotion.

pettiness, stubborness, general mean-ness of spirit.

jadedness, constant negativity. it's perfectly human to have dislikes and bad moods, but i know some people who have trouble seeing the bright side of ANYTHING. i guess i just don't understand people who have this hollow gaping maw where their sense of optimism and gratitude for the good things should be.

rolling complaints thread 2007 =)

this hollow gaping maw where their sense of optimism and gratitude for the good things should be.

It's often been stamped out, beaten out, set on fire, trampled and generally destroyed for most of their lifetime.

mine has nine lives, i think.

i also get frustrated with people who make excuses for their own inertia w/r/t giving a shit about the environment -- global warming is a real thing, and we're all contributing to it, so take some initiative and do your damn part. and stop being glib and condescending about people who actually do make the effort (even if it's relatively superficial).

A sense that life "isn't fair" and that's why you can't achieve anything in life.

nosiness. tightwad behaviour. laziness in an office context. lack of self awareness.

kneejerk dismissal of (potentially awesome) things one isn't familiar with, usually due to insecurity

You know it's not even a trait I dislike, but I am going to admit here that the very cool make me nervous, nervous in a way where I do something stupid like talk about an earlier shart accident, something debasing.

i stand by what i said in 2007.

A sense that life "isn't fair" and that's why you can't achieve anything in life.

this this this. nothing less appealing in a person than a tight & bitter focus on the things that have screwed them over (health problems, bad parenting, evildoers, relationship woes, whatever).

tends to go hand-in-hand with get bent's "jadedness, constant negativity."