If you're gonna sue, SUE BIG!

The link doesn't work. This had better not be that Michael Vick story, because if it is then dude you've just wasted five of my precious minutes trying to get fucking Adobe Acrobat up.

It's working fine for me, and no - not Michael Vick.

plz 2 copy and paste article into thread?

Works great here. LOL @ "defendant: jessica alba", "defendant: "the vatican", "defendant: 'meals on wheels'", "defendand: saddam hussein"

Worked fine for me too, but yeh: what??

can't copy and paste--.pdf

Works fine for me. Can you actually sue a dictionary???

Well, if it's the same dude who sued Vick then his other exploits were thoroughly discussed elsewhere as well.

oh, just fucking TRANSCRIBE it then

defendant: Tsunami Victims

haha, that's marvellous.

(Louis, some dude is suing everyone who has ever pissed him off ever. It's alright, you're not on his list)

it's that RICHES guy. There was a link on a different thread. It was pretty awesome.

FRUIT OF A-LOOM

hahaha it was linked, in fact, on that Michael Vick thread.

Some dude who's in jail, and representing himself. And who, apparently, thinks he's going to get a big payoff from Mt. Rushmore, "Various Buddhist Monks" and "Jeopardy Champion."

This is indeed the Michael Vick story. Riches' many lawsuits were all discussed in great detail on the Michael Vick thread. Hence, those five minutes were wasted.

Right, Oilyrags, you, me, Adobe, and a couple of lawyers, outside, NOW.

I went in the front yard but didn't see anyone.

Louis, i really don't think you of all people want to start a precedent of suing ILXors for wasting yr time.

Zing!

I'll fucking have those 5 minutes too. Saturday, 18 August 2007 14:16-14:21, YOUR ASS IS MINE

Right, Oilyrags, you, me, Adobe, and a couple of lawyers, outside, NOW.

Outside? Youtube more likely!

what's the complaint statement? That's only the list of defendants.

I was wondering that myself. All I can see in that doc is that it's apparently a prisoner's civil rights case, and the defendants are claimed to have violated the rights of Mr. Riches. I think.

OMG:
"Defendant:James Hoffa, president, int'l brotherhood of teamsters"

Good luck getting him to show up in court.

I misread that as brothelhood of teamsters.

http://www.citypaper.net/articles/2006-04-13/fineprint2.shtml

Trial of the Century

Brian Howard

We don't know much about Jonathan Lee Riches. According to a 2004 Houston Chronicle article, the current resident of the Federal Correctional Institution Williamsburg in Salters, S.C., pleaded guilty to his involvement in an identity theft/credit card fraud ring.

But we do know this: The guy's a comic genius. Dude penned perhaps the most engrossing and amusing legal document ever. Faint praise? You be the judge (download full PDF).

On March 9, Riches filed a prisoner civil rights suit (2:06-cv-01055-LP) in Philadelphia's U.S. District Court complete with a 57-page defendant list crammed with luminaries both living (President Bush, Grace Jones) and dead (George Orwell, Malcolm X), as well as nonentities like the Magna Carta, www.accuweather.com and Skittles candy (see list below). It's a magnificent, flowing piece of free-association blame-core.

A source at the court tells us that this sort of filing comes along every once in a while and that it's likely it will be thrown out long before it goes to trial.

Which is a shame. We'd really like to see these people in town pleading their cases.

Selected defendants in the case of Riches v. Bush et al.

George W. Bush, Hillary Rodham Clinton, James Hoffa, www.google.com, Pope Benedict XVI, Kingdom of Saudi Arabia, John Deere, www.accuweather.com, Adolf Hitler's National Socialist Party, Roc-A-Fella Records, Shawn Carter (doing business at Jay-Z), Japan's Nikkei Stock Exchange, Gambino (crime family), Three Mile Island, Tony Danza, Islamic Republic of Iran, University of Miami, GEICO Insurance, Jewish State of Israel, Soledad O'Brien, Tsunami victims, The American Red Cross, Jessica Alba, Charles Moose, al-Qaida Islamic Arm,Fruit of A-Loom (sic), Outback Steakhouse, Donald J. Trump, Chris Berman, Shawn John Combs (doing business as Puff Daddy, doing business as Mr. Ditty (sic)), Vincent K. McMahon, Meals on Wheels, Saddam Hussein, Jewish workers at NBC/Universal, Elizabeth Smart, The Panama Canal Commission, Kelly Clarkston (sic), 13 tribes of Israel, Plato, Lincoln Memorial, Boris Becker, Various Buddhist monks, Christina Applegate, Jewish Mossad, National Vanguard Books, Mein Kampf, Venus Williams, Medieval Times, Denny's, Brotherhood of the Snake, Larry King, Larry King Live 9 p.m., Rastafarian natives, National Association for Stock Car Auto Racing, Ulluminati (sic), Wu-Tang Clan, Wu Wear Inc., Nordic gods, The Da Vinci Code, Sears Tower, Mike Tyson, Native American Fish Society, Green Bay's Lambeau Field, Pizza Hut, Ming Dynasty, Barry Bonds, Gangs in Hong Kong, Grand Wizard of the Ku Klux Klan, National Hockey League Players' Association, Philadelphia Eagles (2005 roster, including Donovan McNabb), The Waffle House …

It just goes on like this. We're working around the clock to bring you the entire defendant list which you can read at www.citypaper.net.

Oh that Vick thread, right.

"Gambino (crime family)" -- just to be clear there