An all-new version of the ILX code is being developed. You can test and comment at sandbox.ilxor.com.

Cows with windows drilled into their sides

Message Bookmarked
Bookmark Removed

My university is the inventor of FISTULATED COWS. (According to an academic advisor – I can't seem find confirmation or info to the contrary).

http://spike-washburn.vpscenter.com/research/FistulatedCows/75u33gr5.jpg

Fistula corked up with a lovely plastic cannula.

http://spike-washburn.vpscenter.com/research/FistulatedCows/Cows%20with%20Windows_files/cownmsu2.jpg

OH YOU SHOULDA CHOSE TRUTH, NOT DARE, SILLY GIRL.

― Abbott, Friday, 24 August 2007 02:27 (nineteen years ago)

My univ. also patented the world's hottest chile and developed the grass used in most football fields.

I get to see these cows every time I walk to my math building!

― Abbott, Friday, 24 August 2007 02:30 (nineteen years ago)

http://www.geocities.com/CollegePark/Union/2867/alexis.JPG
these guys are in my thesis
but i wld not stick my arm in a cow's stomach

― rrrobyn, Friday, 24 August 2007 02:36 (nineteen years ago)

OMGZ does your thesis involve fistulation?

― Abbott, Friday, 24 August 2007 02:37 (nineteen years ago)

uh the other these guys
http://www.geocities.com/CollegePark/Union/2867/willbo.JPG

― rrrobyn, Friday, 24 August 2007 02:37 (nineteen years ago)

it involves digestive systems! and digestive system anatomical knowledges

― rrrobyn, Friday, 24 August 2007 02:37 (nineteen years ago)

i will now promise you that i will incorporate the word fistula or even maybe fistulation though 4 sure

― rrrobyn, Friday, 24 August 2007 02:38 (nineteen years ago)

I can't tell how sexy that portrait of Alexis St. Martin is intended to be.

― Abbott, Friday, 24 August 2007 02:38 (nineteen years ago)

Oh man rrrrobynz you're my hero up north.

― Abbott, Friday, 24 August 2007 02:38 (nineteen years ago)

haha yaay
yeah Alexis St. Martin lived a full fistulated life so i guess he deserves a shirtless portrait of his sexy self? they should've included the Wound - it's like they're teasing us

― rrrobyn, Friday, 24 August 2007 02:43 (nineteen years ago)

i think i have also seen a windowed cow before in real life at a university argriculture research facility - creepy

― rrrobyn, Friday, 24 August 2007 02:45 (nineteen years ago)

I want to see a naked portrait of Phineas Gage, pipe through head, looking all come hither.

― Abbott, Friday, 24 August 2007 02:49 (nineteen years ago)

Is this Idaho Abbott? Seen them there.

― humansuit, Friday, 24 August 2007 05:08 (nineteen years ago)

im sure there's some underground hipster farms drilling linux into their cows

― the sir weeze, Friday, 24 August 2007 05:14 (nineteen years ago)

omg, I've come across the term "fistulated cattle" at work, but didn't realise exactly what it was. Note to self: investigate unfamiliar terminology.

― Hard like armour, Friday, 24 August 2007 05:33 (nineteen years ago)

Why do they have to make it sound like a porn thing? Silly agro-researchers!

― humansuit, Friday, 24 August 2007 05:50 (nineteen years ago)

http://thirdroar.com/paintings/2003-04-Fist/FIST-websmall.jpg

― libcrypt, Friday, 24 August 2007 05:58 (nineteen years ago)

That is one of the most disturbing things I have ever seen.

― S-, Friday, 24 August 2007 06:00 (nineteen years ago)

Wow, the purse in that nose-holding shot.

― Eric H., Friday, 24 August 2007 06:00 (nineteen years ago)

Naw, this is from New Mexico State University's experimental agruictulture station. I got one of the pics from the NMSU student vegetarian site, which asks you to pay a monthly membership fee to "get all their secrets," just like a porn site, except with more blink tags.

― Abbott, Friday, 24 August 2007 06:16 (nineteen years ago)

Whenever I see them, I think of the cow in the Douglas Adams' book that was bred to come to your restaurant table and ask how it would like to be prepared/

― Abbott, Friday, 24 August 2007 06:18 (nineteen years ago)

I love how the text emphasises that these fistualated cows are benefiting their OWN SPECIES, because cows were always panicking about how to make themselves live longer.

― accentmonkey, Friday, 24 August 2007 06:25 (nineteen years ago)

My work has banned your fistulated cows site and I am actually quite happy about that.

In a previous life I used to have to do the sick returns for the staff in my department. One of the descriptive options was 'fistula in ano'. Sadly, I never got to use the term officially but it was a handy threat when someone annoyed me.

― Guilty_Boksen, Friday, 24 August 2007 08:13 (nineteen years ago)

Heh. "Send your questions or comments to: DavisBovine"

I like the idea that a cow at UC Davis answers all the emails sent in from angry PETA types. "No really, it doesnt hurt at all. Check it out dude, I HAS A WINDOW :D"

― Trayce, Friday, 24 August 2007 08:22 (nineteen years ago)

Whenever I see them, I think of the cow in the Douglas Adams' book that was bred to come to your restaurant table and ask how it would like to be prepared

that sounds like a Schmoo!

"Shmoos are delicious, and are so eager to be eaten that if they are looked at by someone who is hungry they will gladly jump into a frying pan, after which they taste like chicken, or into a roasting pan, after which they taste like beef (Raw, they taste like Oysters on the Half-Shell)."

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/7/7b/Twoshmoos.jpg

― Eisbaer, Friday, 24 August 2007 09:00 (nineteen years ago)

seven years pass...

Do you approve of this hole?

http://www.tsemrinpoche.com/tsem-tulku-rinpoche/animals-vegetarianism/a-hole-in-a-cow.html

― goole, Friday, 29 August 2014 16:01 (twelve years ago)

Um I went on a field trip to a farm with my elementary school class in 1988, and there were some of these cows there and I volunteered to put on a long plastic glove and stick my hand in the hole. And pull out some of the half-digested grass. There is a photo of me doing this.

― franny glasshole (franny glass), Friday, 29 August 2014 16:25 (twelve years ago)

this is a real thing what the hell.

i also recently learned that in holland there are places you can go to relieve stress by cuddling special therapeutic cows. cows are full of surprises.

― Merdeyeux, Friday, 29 August 2014 17:25 (twelve years ago)

When I was in college I lived north of campus near one of the agricultural/animal science research areas and I'd walk past fistulated horses on the way to class sometimes.

― mh, Friday, 29 August 2014 17:29 (twelve years ago)

When I talked to some people who worked at a facility where they did cow digestion research, they said that the original procedure involve putting a deflated football (american style) in the hole and then slowly inflating it bit by bit over a week or so

― mh, Friday, 29 August 2014 17:30 (twelve years ago)


You must be logged in to post. Please either login here, or if you are not registered, you may register here.