Women: would you be in a relationship with someone who revealed that he had sex with a prostitute?

I have done that.

I'm of both minds, a bit.

1. Someone having paid for sex before our relationship is no more my business than whomever he dated before our relationship is. It's history. Or at least it better be.

2. It's a little..."meh", eh? Yeah, it's irrational, but I find it a little squicky.

He was in the army at the time. Of course it was one of many red flags I should have paid attention to.

The other being "he was in the army" presumably.

Watch it.

no, absolutely not

Hmm, I think it would depend on the circumstances. In general though, I would think this act shows a lack of regard for safety, women, and his own self-integrity. While I wouldn't find him "unclean" (assuming he did have a clear bill of health) I would be concerned that the poor personal qualities which led him to a hooker could seep into our relationship.

.. or out of it, right?

poor personal qualities which led him to a hooker
Bingo.

As opposed to those stellar (and more parsimonious) qualities which led him to a slut?

doesnt kenan's girlfriend post to ilx?

At least a slut involves some sort of communication and attempt to connect with another human beyond exchanging cash. Also real mean just learn to use their hand instead of using other people.

I might think differently if prostitution were legal and legit. But as it is most women are forced into it by addiction or other bad situations. Men who employ them are truly taking advantage of them.

Ethan, shut the fuck up.

Ethan, go be a fucking old lady somewhere else, god, you're like a bitter mother-in-law in perpetuity.

http://goddamn.lardpirates.com/archive/pictures/umad.gif

And you're an asshole. At least after I eat my delicious lunch I'll be in a good mood again.

As opposed to those stellar (and more parsimonious) qualities which led him to a slut?
You mean ME?

"Men who employ them are truly taking advantage of them."

I disagree, but this topic was bandied about ad nauseum on another thread. There's some advantage being taken by the prostitute as well in a lot of these situations.

Someone having paid for sex before our relationship is no more my business than whomever he dated before our relationship is. It's history. Or at least it better be.

seems a bit unrealistic to thing *everything that happened in someone's life* is somehow moot now you're in it?

I used to live downstairs from a prostitute in Paris (where it is legal) who had a very regular clientele of mostly middle-aged men. The arrangement seemed more respectful and mutually beneficial than some sordid one-night stands.

You mean ME?

Of course not Beth. I would never refer to you as a slut without appending the words feral-haired!

xpost

So you would rather pay a desperate, crack-addled woman for a blowjob rather than downloading some porn and taking care of yourself.

Yes Michael what you're describing is pretty different than what happens in the states.

ahh yes the undesperate non-crack-addled women of internet porn

That's a different argument and while I don't deny that porn isn't a problematic industry I'd much rather date a man who watched porn than one who used illegal prostitutes.

I suppose there are degrees of 'doing this', i.e paying a fair bit fr sex w/ someone attractive, as opposed to cheap sex etc...

If only Paul Brickman had made a sequel to Risky Business in which Tom Cruise's character and chums all fail to be attracted to or indeed attract girls at college after it's revealed they all spent their trust funds on super attractive call girls the previous Summer.

Uh, well, unless there are issues borne out in everyday behavior, obv, everything that happened in someone's life before me IS moot. First of all, it's done and over and not undo-able, and second it's none of my business any more than criticizing (or being jealous of) MY choices is HIS business. I mean, you can disapprove if you want, but it won't gain you anything.

the desperate crack-addled women of the world thank you

xxp

gah not dating men who watched pr0n would realllly narrow the dating pool, wouldn't it

xxxpost

What if they had murdered someone or had previously liked to visit Thailand for child sex? I mean I think I would at least like to know about this. Along with any other felony convictions.

bell labs OTM

I'd have thought it was more unattractive to be in a relationship w/ someone who'd slept around loads. as opposed to slept w/ a pro (we're talking once, I guess, right?)

But then, I'm not a w.

men who want to visit thailand for child sex should just download some child porn and take care of themselves at home

What are the chances, do you think, that you're going to end up in a relationship, all unknowing, with a pedophile? I mean, really. Out of the overall population. It seems a little hysterical to make that some kind of standard.

it's kind of part of someone's character and shit? i dunno, i'm not saying you can pre-judge necessarily, but maybe decisions people have made will tell you things about them. or is that crazy?

haha!

xxpost

Hi, the middle ground is calling, you're missing your coffee date right now.

Obv. it's an extreme example valid. People in relationships should be open with each other. If the other person is judgemental or unable to accept you past and all, they are not someone you should be in a relationship.

And there are lots of people out there who abuse and exploit others (sexually and otherwise). I think the chances of the average single adult encountering them is not unlikely. Or hysterical to think so.

"but valid" rather and "should not" duh.

It's a little nuts to think that, at the point of intimacy at which a person is likely to DIVULGE this info in the first place, you wouldn't have formed any stronger impression of yr partner's character and values than could be destroyed by one past indiscretion.

On the other hand, if the guy says over dinner on yr first date that he's partial to working girls and hopes you don't mind, then you're right, probably not a good bet.

I know you're always ready to call me nuts Laurel so we should just agree to disagree on this matter.

I know you're always ready to call me nuts Laurel so we should just agree to disagree on this matter.

-- Ms Misery, Tuesday, September 11, 2007 3:57 PM (11 seconds ago) Bookmark Link

leprechaunonthephone.gif

I rather like the idea of a prostitute in theory, but a combination of squeamishness and sentimentality precludes me from ever going there. I'm the kind of guy who would end up just talking for my allotted time, making us both feel even worse about the whole thing.

Ms Misery, in most major cities, even in the States, there are expensive 'escorts' or what have you who are not all crack-addled.

I think the fact that I'm 51 yrs old and the only woman thus far who has copped to consorting with a protitute-user is not just coincidental. We got together in 1981, before anything was known about AIDS. There was a lot of sexual-outlaw behavior going on. Since then people have learned the hard way to be more cautious.

OK ladies:
a) for 1-10 times slept with a prostitute in a place where it is legal (Amsterdam, Vegas)
vs.
b) for 1-10 times slept with someone who worked for him (let's say he's a manager)
vs.
c) for 1-10 times slept with his close friend's girlfriend/wife

I think my feeling is coming from the fac that some people I love have very checkered pasts, and their partners know about that and have accepted/married/loved them anyway. I would be v angry with someone who couldn't see that the past was past and wd be willing to throw away yr possib future together.

xpost

travisbickle.jpg

xxpost

Beth, I think it's a better guess that you're the only who knows for sure. Of all my exes I can only think of one who might have done this but he had so many other bad qualities this one would just get lost in the wash

That looks like some weird SAT word problem upthread.

I'm the kind of guy who would end up just talking for my allotted time, making us both feel even worse about the whole thing.

i've heard that this happens quite often though, with prostitutes and with strippers, that some men actually do just want to talk! esp if they are older

it happens a lot in coming-of-age films.

lost in the wash
Which circles back to gray water.

where is Beth Parker now? Only she could possibly help me.

I'm here! I brought my barbeque tongs and I'll have those balls out in no time!

Words, Beth, I hope never to hear or read again.

OUT! thanks to, and I'm not kidding, some crazy oil from thailand left behind by a former resident of the house.

uh/

Ker-Bangers, jacksy, never....

Emily, should that ever happen again, a very nice lady at a sex toy party I attended this weekend (bachelorette party I had no choice) said the key to getting those out is just to squat.

mental notes from ilx edu:

make sure buttplug has flared base

only use ben-wa balls if crazy oil from thailand is onhand (or one is able to squat comfortably)

I'm sure some frying oil in a turkey baster would do as well. Inject, stand on head to really get it in there, and then squat.

i have no idea what this thread is about anymore.

too bad rumpie left 'balls' off her british bbq poll

I'm curious as to what exactly makes Thai oil 'crazy'?

The thread has mutated from philosophical to useful. You never know when you or a loved one will get a foriegn object stuck in her giney.
Which is sort of like being in a relationship with a ho-client.

foreign. God.

xxxxpost

Yeah, sorry. I started posting about my Rachael Ray sexual fantasies, and then the whole thread imploded into some Food Network meets hardcore porn thing.

I was in a green card marriage when I was 20. Talkin' foreign objects up there.

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/7/72/Balls.jpg/469px-Balls.jpghttp://img.photobucket.com/albums/v201/sevenxviii/parenthesis7.gif

'Tongs, Ben-Wa balls, crazy oil' also sounds like the title of the memoirs of a sex tourist.

nice one, BP

I want to know where they got to. There's only a limited amount of space in there, right?

http://www.barbados.gov.bb/images/HarCave.jpg

You gotta watch the childbirthing.

So, are there a lot of OB/GYN's who also have training in dentistry?

HI-YO!!

http://i9.tinypic.com/5ykgk9k.jpg

Look, asking the guard would entail describing how this entire company whores itself out to the sales department so in interests of everyone's sanity, how bout I just eat across the street.

too bad rumpie left 'balls' off her british bbq poll

-- blueski, Wednesday, 12 September 2007 14:46 (1 hour ago) Link

lol grocery groin

I'm curious as to what exactly makes Thai oil 'crazy'?

-- Michael White, Wednesday, September 12, 2007 2:46 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Link

umm, it was really oily oil?

omg

lol "men: would you have sex with a woman who was once a protitutr"

HAHAHA this thread went from lame to awesome

alls it takes is someone to admit to sticking things in their vagina. Instant funzone.

Is that what you call it?

http://www.straightdope.com/columns/011221.html

That is instant funkillzone. Come on, there were rapes and infants in that link ≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠≠ fun.

Who gives a shit what these people think?

The solution is to squat and bear down and push it out, just as if one were straining with a bowel movement. One can also use a finger or two to help direct the object out

looooooool Eyeball Kicks

Results 1 - 100 of about 256,000 for "ben wa balls". (0.20 seconds)
Results 1 - 100 of about 1,200 for "benoit balls". (0.12 seconds)

lol

I had this dream last night that Nerds candy came out with a fruit-roll-up style candy scrotal sac, and that you could buy (separately) individual candy testicles to put in it.

Ohhhhhhh....kayyyyyyyy....

You need to copyright that shit, Abbott.

Abbot's brain can't be copyrighted. Patented, maybe.

Additional Question...

What if their dad had tried to procure said prostitute?

Fucking hell all I got for my 14th was a lousy ZX81.

My father had a breakdown around mine - he was probably worrying about approaching prostitutes.

If you see a prostitute approaching you can always cross the road.

I just cannot imagine taking your son out (even if he was 20 let mind 14!) to look for prostitutes. "How about that one, son?"

I can't imagine repeatedly sexually assaulting your kids either but you know that stuff goes on :(

In this case his dad was probly trying to make sure he didn't grow up to be one of them gays or something.

I saw a father/son (who happened to have Down Syndrome)at a strip club once. I couldn't decide whether it was completely wrong and freaky or sort of sweet.

This thing with the hooker and the 14 yr old = definitely wrong and freaky.