The thread for posting violent fantasies in revenge for tiny slights.

Dear (redacted)

I already don't like you. Coming into my room while I'm gone, and installing "Apple Update" on my (Windows) computer without my knowledge or permission when you have a goddamn apple computer of your own is really unacceptable. With this little antic are rapidly getting to the point where the best medical advice you will ever receive is 'steer clear of Austin.' Come in here again and I'll cut your eyes out and feed them to the dogs.

Keep that in mind, shithead, if you're capable of such an astonishing feat of common courtesy.

This idea that they are impossible to predict is rubbish. Most people who do this have an orchestrated plan it has taken them months or usually years to set up and do. It’s not done on impulse at all. It’s based on long standing fantasies which they usually divulge to those close to them. I know because I have seen people divulge aberrant plans and act on them years later.

The actual plan is just to move out into a place of my own as soon as possible, but thanks for the advice.

PS: Love your show: "Shit was unseemly!" hahahahah!

I have frequently wished for the super-strength to grab a street harasser by the neck and pin him to a brick wall until his eyes bug out, unconsciousness possibly resulting. Ahhhhhh.....

Nice one. Watching the fear, panic and helplessness on their face fade away into nothing as you feel their muscles go limp...

Good stuff!

That's it exactly.

Dear workmate, I know I am way too easily irritated with your apelike apeparance and ice-crunching all day long, but boy howdy am I going knobble your knees with a nail-covered 2by4 and smash both your kneecaps.

"Hi, I'm on a train, I'm trying to log onto my laptop but it's not accepting my windows password. Can you reset it? No? Why not? You've done it for me before! Yes you have! Are you calling me a liar? So you're saying I can't use my laptop until I'm back in the office? But I'm in Bonn for the next four days! This is ridiculous, who is your manager? Helpdesk? Why are you called the helpdesk when you don't help?"

I wish for a bolt of electricity to fire out of their phone and zap them in the head leaving their hair black and frazzled and their noses smoking.

http://www.forbiddenplanet.co.uk/bmz_cache/1/10f2448e646d5f7a66957203940952e0.image.184x200.jpg

was this the guy?