How to get free turducken

The largest recorded nested bird roast is 17 birds, attributed to a royal feast in France in the 19th century: a bustergophechiduckneaealcockidgeoverwingailusharkolanbler (originally called a Rôti Sans Pareil, or "Roast without equal") - a bustard stuffed with a turkey, a goose, a pheasant, a chicken, a duck, a guinea fowl, a teal, a woodcock, a partridge, a plover, a lapwing, a quail, a thrush, a lark, an Ortolan Bunting and a Garden Warbler. The final bird is small enough that it can be stuffed with a single olive; it also suggests that, unlike modern multi-bird roasts, there was no stuffing or other packing placed in between the birds. This dish probably could not be recreated in the modern era as many of the listed birds are now protected species.

Wkipedia says ZOMG!

In a 2007 episode of Bizarre Foods with Andrew Zimmern, Andrew Zimmern tried the Turducken at "Hebert's Specialty Meats" and enjoyed it!

He liked three commonly eaten fowls!

Some kinda Cronenbird, they are...

Nevermind I guess that is a cake.

this thread title totally got my hopes up :(

No, soorrryy. I mean 'how do (I) (get a way) to get free turducken'

I am terrible

Look, it is like eating the entire fucking earth and its core.

http://www.cajunspecialtymeats.com/prodimg/217.jpg

In this simile, we are living on turkey skin.

A point from a turducken forum that I am pretty sure I can agree with...?

i want deep fried turkey!

Deep-fried turkey: not as good as you'd think.

http://www.lasternet.com/turducken/open.jpg

"Workin' on the Tur here..."

Fudge that, G00bles, the deep fried turkey is a fatty-juicy-crispy yumsplosion!

The closest I have come to getting free turducken:

Outside the co-op near a former home, I discovered an eight-pack of what looked like the most delicious, fancy canned soups I had ever seen. Venison, roast beef, and most exciting, turducken! This was highly serendipitous because I was starving and broke!

When I got it home and examined it under the light, look what the fucking fin print at the bottom said:

http://www.arcatapet.com/fullsize/9286.jpg

wow that picture.

I had deep-fried turkey and it was fine, but it was still, you know, turkey.

Now smoked turkey, that is a preparation I can get behind. I would eat smoked turkey all the time if I had the means to procure it.

xpost hahaha

Where does the turducken live?

Our friends brought a turducken from New Orleans, where they live, to a New Years dinner at our home a couple of years back, and it was really BLAH -- not evenly cooked, not even nice looking on the plate.

not even nice looking on the plate.

come on, is this really a consideration? It's a duck, stuffed inside a chicken, stuffed inside a turkey.

I know, the lady doesn't appreciate the native animals of New Orleans, where they live.

She should have got her relatives to bring spring rolls, the ingrate.

I am thinking I'd rather have a turduckduck, with two ducks and no chicken. I eat too damn much chicken.

i had a dream last night that i shot and killed a duck, but then i was at a loss about how to defeather/butcher it.

We're having two ducks for Thanksgiving, for three people! stuffed with wild rice tho

wildriduck

Wine pairings?

Post-Gazette wine columnist Dave DeSimone chose the wines. "I dug deep for this one," he says. "There are wines that go with all three birds."

He talked about acidity, fruitiness, tannins and other fancy oenological terms. Everybody was relieved when he said, "Begging off, we'll open four wines and decide what we like."

i think i want get into duck hunting. seriously!

pinot noir xpost

side dishes = parsnips, pear salad and another two bottles of wine

Brownie I will buy you a custom trophy if you come do this

This is really the only challenging part. We had a difficult time finding a cooking needle so far before Thanksgiving, so we resorted to a carpet needle, which worked very well. The greasy nature of the bird made it necessary to grip the needle with a paper towel to guide it in and out of the meat. You'll need one person to squeeze the edges of the turkey together like a suitcase or a backpack, and you might end up taking out a few fistfuls of the stuffing at this point -- you won't miss it. Don't worry about what the other birds are doing as long as they're in there.

When you're done sewing, it looks like a giant well-dressed frog in a smart sweater, or a big, relaxed, compliant baby.

done and done

Don't worry about what the other birds are doing as long as they're in there.

Words to live by, these.

OMG that was the whole point of starting this thread, to con someone into giving me turducken.

xp

If you're inexperienced at boning fowl, start with the turkey. After boning the turkey, the duck and the chicken will go much faster.

HAHAHAHA

http://cajunmeats.com/images1/TurkeyKnockout2.jpg

http://cajunmeats.com/images1/TurkeyKnockout2.jpg

It is a cornucopia woven from FOWL MEATS.

The online store is including Conversation Guidelines with each Turducken ordered. Their signature product, the Turducken is a regional specialty of a deboned turkey, stuffed with a duck, that is stuffed with a chicken.

"Presidential candidates are famous for 'duck(ing)' the questions, and on any given day, they can certainly act like 'turkeys.' They even might get 'chicken' enough to avoid any situation that draws criticism," explains Charlie Hohorst who developed the company's "Who's a Chicken, Who's a Duck, Who's a Turkey Conversation Guidelines" to add a funny, tongue-in-cheek aspect to the product line. "Of course, the cook can destroy the guidelines in hope of avoiding the possibility of political arguments at the dinner table — good luck!"

I think the point of reading this would be to make the audience so sick you get all 24 lbs of turducken for yourself.

Ha! If Wikipedia is to be believed, I grew up about ten minutes away from the birthplace of the turducken: Hebert's Specialty Meats in Maurice, LA. I love it when Cajun insanity enters the cultural zeitgeist.

after eating so much fatty fowl it should be called the cultural zitgeist amirite

Does it have to be foul? You could conceivably stuff a squirrel in a rabbit in a pig or something. Squirrabbipig.

Or just like a dozen squirrels in a shark. Mix it up a little.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0514083/quotes

trout in a duck in a badger in a boar in a man in GRENDEL

"Hebert's Specialty Meats"

PHWOAR shit yeah, that's blood, yo; the heberts have a long history of stuffing big things inside of things that are slightly larger, with delicious results!

FOR X'S SAKE HOOK ME UP KENAN

wish I could. Besides, it's the shipping that costs you and arm and a wing.

But it really is worth it... you know how after thanksgiving you get sick of turkey sandwiches? You never get sick of turkey/duck/chicken sandwiches.

GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH WANT WITH THE FURY OF 1K SUNS

BUT HAVE $0.00

FUCK I AM A PRISS

SORRY Y'ALL

http://www.ibiblio.org/Dave/Dr-Fun/df200312/df20031210.jpg

how is the meat of three birds supposed to be a miracle weight-loss recipe

tofurkurkeyfurky !?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Turducken#In_popular_culture

(the next one in that article is really inspired too)

I had no idea it was supposed to be a miracle weight loss thing, esp. since they weigh like 24 lbs. an I know if I had one I'd eat all 24 lbs of it within 3-4 days.

"I would eat smoked turkey all the time if I had the means to procure it."

60 bucks:

http://brinkmann.net/images/products/OutdoorCooking/810-5301-C-L.jpg

Yeah esp. around thxgiving you can get 'fry daddys' or other turkey fryin' machines for pretty damn cheap. Oh god want meat now.

it's all about heritage birds these days

http://www.forkandbottle.com/shopping/internetshop/images/gdshepturk.jpg

if you aren't paying 200+ for your turkey than you ain't hip

http://www.bbqblog.net/images/turkey/thanksgiving/2006/heritage_turkey.jpg

show me the money!

http://www.thenibble.com/reviews/main/draft/images/turkeyheadcopy.jpg

http://i.imgur.com/jYmYf7b.jpg

bacon??

just another of those really smart octopus doing its regular shape-shifting camouflage things

cthulducken