007: LICENCE TO POLL

Still torn.

But I can categorically state that my shortlist features no Roger Moore movies.

From Russia With Love - great Cold War atmospherics, twisty plot, ridiculously tense Orient Express showdown, gypsy women knife fighting over Bond, KILLER SHOE.

Also Daniela Bianchi = top 3 hottest Bond girls ever, Robert Shaw = awesome, Lotte Lenya = Lotte Lenya

be apprised: there will be hottest girl/baddest bad guy, etc., later.

I think we've done a Theme Song poll. I seem to recall getting mad arsey cos "You Only Live Twice" didn't win.

The only one i like all the way through is Goldfinger. Most of them are a bunch of action sequences without any effort put into connecting them.

http://i10.glitter-graphics.org/pub/1/1140r4teg1tiai.gif

Sorry chap, but the gypsy women are fighting over who gets to marry the chief's son, not over Bond. Excellent scene though, particularly as it's followed by the even more excellent-er gunfight/brawl/battle between the gypsies and the Bulgars.

"Never Say Never Again" beats the shite out of "Octopussy" - they were released the same year and it's amazing how they stack up against each other.

"Die Another Day" has to come somewhere near the bottom, it's really more like one of those "quiz" DVDs - "which Bond movie is referenced by this scene/prop/character name?"

i have a soft spot for 'octopussy', just from seeing it a lot as a kid, one of those things. it's kind of racist, iirc.

the bits in germany are deece though.

Sorry chap, but the gypsy women are fighting over who gets to marry the chief's son, not over Bond.

My mistake. The music in that scene is phenomenal.

we did this 3 or 4 months ago for sure

yeah, well.

pierce brosnan was so rubbish

You think his acting's bad? Just have a look at his painting skills!

http://i48.photobucket.com/albums/f223/joegood/main-painting-26.jpg

nice portrait of ron perlman there

This was hard - 'You Only Live Twice' for me...

goldeneye had everything... hot chicks with awesome accents, a corrupt russian general, high tech helicopters, sean bean, technobabble that ages terribly ('we need 25 computers with pentium processors and 14.4 modems!'), exploding trains, joe don baker, a gigantic satellite dish falling on top of a guy, etc etc

I'm torn between On Her Majesty's Secret Service, From Russia with Love, and the latest Casino Royale.

I just spent 5 minutes trying to find an image of Goldeneye N64 with the DK cheat turned on, so I could try to make a funny. I give up.

It's all about the song, people. Therefore: Shirley Bassey sings Goldfinger wins in a walk.

we will poll theme songs. we will poll soundtracks. all will be polled.

(xxpost) searching on YouTube for "goldeneye dk" brings up a couple of example videos - basically, everybody's head is big.

license to kill was an excellent spectrum game. a view to a kill however was terrible :(

http://www.worldofspectrum.org/showscreen.cgi?screen=screens/load/v/gif/ViewToAKillA.gif
http://ftp.worldofspectrum.org/pub/sinclair/screens/in-game/v/ViewToAKillA.gif

That last Moore one was really bad,

GOLDEN GUN GOLDEN GUN GOLDFINGER GOLDEN GUN GOLDEN GUN GOLDEN GUN FOR YOUR EYES ONLY GOLDEN GUN GOLDEN GUN GOLDEN GUN

from russia

so good.

Now I imagine you singing that as the theme song.

"From Ruuuusssssia, so goooooood..."

I'd probably have to vote for From Russia as well for having the best ensemble cast, easy. I don't think any other Bond film actually balances the unavoidable predominance of Bond himself with the others around him. Pedro Armendariz alone, what a performance -- especially since he knew he was dying of cancer, was in terrible pain throughout the film and killed himself after his work was completed. But you'd never know it at all from his work on the screen.

especially since he knew he was dying of cancer, was in terrible pain throughout the film and killed himself after his work was completed. But you'd never know it at all from his work on the screen.

!

It's really impossible for me to choose between From Russia With Love and On Her Majesty's Secret Service, but the goggles sealed it.

http://download.videoegg.com/gid344/cid1112/XT/58/1187443232xgzw5kCmBtUKPSX3ccQT_thumbnail.jpg

Gonna have to go with James Blonde, tho I hope You Only Live Twice and The Living Daylights get repped here. This poll might prompt an overhaul of my netflix queue.

The Living Daylights

An underrated fave of mine, along with For Your Eyes Only, both of which confirm that John Glen was a perfectly sufficient Bond director (pity the other three he handled were saddled with their own problems).

say Live and Let DIIIIIIE

but barbara bach's breasts at the end of The Spy Who Loved Me are vote-worthy in their own right.

From Russia with Love. Love Shaw's character, and the fight scene in the train cabin between him and Connery.

conventional wisdom says 'from russia' is best because it wasn't all about bloated set-pieces then. i may vote 'thunderball' in protest (plus the girl in that -- domino -- be like damn).

DIE ANOTHER DAY (CRAP)

If it didn't have a lair made of ice it even would have been worse.

Totally From Russia With Love. Robert Shaw might be my favorite Bond bad guy - its either him or Odd Job.

http://www.bondmovies.com/henchmen/oddjob.jpg

v.

http://www.bondmovies.com/henchmen/grant.jpg

Necros is pretty great what with listening to The Pretenders all the time and being Gary Numan

Goddamn, you're right about that last part.

If history had been different and Timothy Dalton made A View to a Kill opposite Grace Jones and Christopher Walken...

stop it, Ned.

http://www.bondmovies.com/henchmen/nicknack.jpg

Nick Nack!

is die another day really even more awful than tomorrow never dies? because jesus christ

I always thought that Tomorrow Never Dies was the best of the Brosnan Bonds, next to GoldenEye, though I haven't seen either in several years.

Die Another Day is probably the nadir of the franchise.

DAD is the postmodern bond that had to happen eventually. I just watched it, I think they managed to make a scene quote from each of the previous 19 in it. Honestly though I'm not sure if it's the worst IMO.

After this poll is done we're taking everything that gets 0 votes and holding 007: DIE ANOTHER DUD.

oh and I finally made my vote and my vote was YOLT

the worst bond is the one with Denise Richards

To the 4 people who voted for "Moonraker": you just voted for a better sendup of Bond than (Casino Royale). congrats, i guess.
To the person who voted for "Spy": I owe you drinks, dude.
To the person who voted for "Diamonds": I'm sorry the poll wasn't explained more carefully oh and here come check out my shark tank for a minute.

octopussy should come top of the bottoms.

Unfortunately The Spy Who Loved Me doesn't hold up as well as it should; nothing HAPPENS for 15 minutes. I really can't stand Roger Moore and his habit of smirking a line to telegraph that he understands IT'S A DOUBLE ENTENDRE.

Still classic: Jaws vs Jaws. The most ludicrously awesome Bond moment?

most ludicrously awesome Bond moment

needs its own poll. more nominees plz!

Someone needs to remind me of what happens in FYEO. Worth renting?

crossbow babe. bond turns down a slutty bimbo ice skater because she's like 16 years old and gives her a line implying she is more of a whore than even he is. bond fights guys on motorbikes in the snow. bond skis down a bobsled track being chased by a motorcycle. excellent moogy italo disco score by bill conti - the first 007 score I ever bought

worth OWNING. if the villains weren't so mediocre it would probably be moore's best bar none IMO

i'd say it's a solid second tier bond flick, but IMO most bonds worth renting. FYEO includes adventures in the Alps and some Greek shenanigans. It culminates with a basket being lifted to a cliff-top monestary.

and The Dove, avid pistachio chomper

bond skis down a bobsled track being chased by a motorcycle

def the most ludicrously awesome scene from fyeo, but for my money doesn't compete with jaws on jaws.

yeah but jaws on jaws was not backed by conti's amazing "runaway" tune

but it WAS backed by disco strings playing a Morodor-esque theme!

there's a moment in Moonraker when Drax's space people exit the station and all of a sudden like 50 armed astronauts pop out of a shuttle and for one moment when the two armies are suspended in space you're like awwwshiiitttt this will be the most L.A. event EVER. it is not.

what happens in FYEO

and yellow citroen cv crashing downhill through orchard, and young ice skater chick harassing bond for sex whilst scary mentor woman scolds. This was the episode with the amazing Spectrograph!

The laser battle in Moonraker is probably the most ludicrously awful Bond moment. I guess it came out more or less the same time as Star Wars and they felt obliged to get a bit zappy.

(xpost) Ste, I think you mean Identograph, that computer based Fotofit thingy that Q has to load a Winchester HD into.

for one moment when the two armies are suspended in space

...then it looks like Star Wars remade using Star Wars figures.

"You Only Live Twice" is on ITV1 now.

lookin' at my gucci it's about that time

fylingdales = actually a top-secret conference room.

LOL at British guy telling Americans and Russias what to do...

that is a quality opening though.

DoP is freddie young -- not exactly a lightweight.

"take this officer aft"

lol he doesn't really mean buttsex.

damn, son.

those japanese walls are made for running through.

The actor who plays Tanaka usually played the "Bond" role in Japanese spy movies.

"you are three and a half minutes early"? is this kind of anality a japanese stereotype i'm unaware of?

I think it's supposed to imply Japanese efficiency.

Why is Marc Almond flying that helicopter?

compared with 'tunderball' it's way cool that you don't know what the big scheme is until so late on.

woah $100m is a hell of a lot more than blofeld was demanding only two years previously.

OK, that Snickers commercial featuring Mr. T in a tank is weird...

it's suckage how many ninjas die

I think Kissy Suzuki is my favourite Bond Girl name.

dd

LTK is much better than I remembered it. I think I may have last seen it over ten years ago - I either did not notice at the time or had just forgotten that flygirl is completely smoking hot. in my top three now anyway. apparently she's now married to richard gere.

"married"

FYEO is worse than I rememberd. Mooore acts like he's rolling a Mandrax around in his mouth. Tombot OTM about how dull the villains. Carole Bouquet thoroughly adequate.

OMIGOD I forgot about the Margaret Thatcher moment.

That's one of the best bits!

I stand by the 'climb up the cliffside to the headquarters' sequence. Not an easy stunt. And Bond kicking the car off the cliff obv.

and Julian Glover was equally boring in Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade.

the Thatcher bit wasn't bad.

I'm watching the short documentary; they make a big deal out of the car scene and how Moore, Glenn, et al were concerned that it "would alter perceptions of James Bond for years to come." Guess I'm not as steeped in the 007 mythos.

YEAH YOU.

It's easily the closest Moore got to Fleming's Bond, but it did go against the style of how the film Bond had evolved. (There's a bit in The Spy Who Loved Me in the rooftop fight that comes close but the car scene here is far colder.)

but I remember Connery embracing the character's thuggishness.

I guess I don't understand the difference between "cold-bloodedly" dispatching the guy in the car and dropping Blofield in his wheelchair through a smokestack.

he's a sociopath first and the flair is optional. but so rarely is he allowed an opportunity to take his time and dispatch a significant villain in an extremely straighforward manner that we begin to imagine the flair is mandatory. then he kicks a car off a cliff. "oh, shit. I forgot I was rooting for a terrible person."

they fucked it all up in TMWTGG when he let nick nack survive.

he's a sociopath first and the flair is optional. but so rarely is he allowed an opportunity to take his time and dispatch a significant villain in an extremely straighforward manner that we begin to imagine the flair is mandatory. then he kicks a car off a cliff. "oh, shit. I forgot I was rooting for a terrible person."

I suppose there's some mixed messages going on, since earlier Bond is friendly enough to nod at one of the pursuit cars in the Citroen chase. Still, Bond racks up a pretty impressive body count in this. Have those lilies sent to the funeral indeed.

Moore does look tired, but it doesn't help when there's "OOFs" looped in whenever Bond takes a blow in the ski chase.

the ludicrous italoscore makes up for a lot. the hockey is either hilarious camp or awful heresy depending on which other entry you watched last.

the ludicrous italoscore makes up for a lot. the hockey is either hilarious camp or awful heresy depending on which other entry you watched last.

It's camp, but not in an irritating way. If you're on board for the indestructible Citroen 2CV and underwater chases through sunken Greek temples, then what the hell. Rock climbing action piece is pretty great too. Carole Bouquet way underrated: handy with a crossbow, owns a submarine, and apparently hasn't aged at all since 1981.

"That's detente comrade. You don't have it. I don't have it."

If I DJ'ed at all, I would totally use the insane italoscore ALL THE TIME