Heathers

not more than once, anyway

Michael Lehmann, Daniel Waters, Winona Ryder, Christian Slater. They all went to shit.

Without "Heathers," one could argue that there would be no "Jawbreaker," no "Mean Girls" and certainly no "Juno."

Why do people continue to write sentences like this? Do they actually believe them?

LICK. IT. UP.

There he wrote, directed and starred in a local sketch comedy series called "Beyond Our Control" with Larry Karaszewski -- one half of the team (with Scott Alexander) that wrote "Ed Wood," "The People vs. Larry Flynt" and "Man on the Moon."

they dont mention he also wrote problem child, problem child 2, problem child 3, and episodes of the problem child tv series

problem child tv series

?!?!

Was that horrible red headed kid in that too?

So there might have been a Mean Girls, but there *certainly* wouldn't have been a Juno.

Juno isn't as good as people said it was.

fuck me with a chainsaw.

fuck me gently with a chainsaw.

real life sucks losers dry, if you want to fuck with the eagles better learn how to fly.

i was obsessed with this for a year, saw it too many times to count. don't know if I could watch it now. it's nice to know that you can write one seminal movie and live comfortably in orson welles' home though, without doing anything good again!

Everyone in Hollywood seems to live in Orson Welles old home.

Problem Child >>>>>> The People vs. Larry Flynt

ESKIMO

I love my dead gay son.

Swash Dogs and Diet Coke Heads: the 2008 rolling Guardian zing thread

this was 12-year-old me's favorite movie

swatch dogs, i thought?

It's a pun for the use of the thread, just showing that Heathers has been the source of naming for at least one classic ILM thread

oop, got it.

i love the whole chainsaw line: "fuck me gently with a chainsaw, do i look like mother teresa?"

Without "Heathers," one could argue that there would be no "Jawbreaker," no "Mean Girls" and certainly no "Juno."

"nothing is any good unless it inspired a bunch of lame imitations."

Heathers! ;-)

Hahah

Christian Slater was never hotter.

I was cursed with having two high school friends who did the Winona Ryder-Winona's dad routine ("You two!") every chance they got.

Sara R-C and I didn't know you in high school!

Movie doesn't hold up

Sara R-C and I didn't know you in high school!

I always wondered why you guys loved croquet so much.

Can anybody tell me why I smoke these damn things?

Because you're an idiot.

Oh right...

http://z.about.com/d/top40/1/5/5/A/yourbeautifuljb.jpg

Kim Walker, the actress who play Heather Chandler and said "Did you have a brain tumor for breakfast?" actually died of a brain tumor!

o_O

O_o

"heathers" i think holds up pretty well. the way it's filmed is interesting - it has this weird, artificial, sort of semi-nightmarish feel to it that works a lot better for me than the candy-colored aura of most of those other teen movies.

I don't really like my friends, they're like people I work with and our job is being popular and shit.

Oddly IRL my friend J was the Veronica in our school and that's kind of what she says now about the clique girls.

The film holds up amazingly well.

Sort of how I felt circa 1996.

Heathers.

Lick. It. Up.

“I bought the house because I wanted to get that ‘Citizen Kane’ mojo,” says Waters. “Instead I’m getting the end of [Welles’] career, the hanging out with Henry Jaglom, doing wine commercials and magic tricks part of his life.

anybody who can deliver an off-hand dis of Henry Jaglom in an interview is cool w/me

http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/513SZG6C13L._SL500_AA280_.jpg

i really don't think I could watch this movie now, not because the movie isn't good, but because I just feel too old for it.

Though, strangely, Waters seems confused about the fact that the Orson Wells wine commercial outtakes clip is the single most satisfying piece of entertainment in the history of the filmic medium.

...inspired by that same French excellence...

(x-post)

you're such a pillowcase.

fuck i loves this film.

ich luge bullets! aw.

"Whether or not to kill yourself is one of the most important decisions a teenager can make."

"Dear Diary: I want to kill, and you have to believe that it's for more than just selfish reasons!"

God, this movie's heart is black. Total classic.

"all they had to offer the school was another year of date rapes and aids jokes".

truly black.

i remember some lame rolling stone movie list where they gushed that this movie was like "blue velvet for teenagers." which is crap because heathers is darker than blue velvet.

I don't really like my friends, they're like people I work with and our job is being popular and shit.

The response to this is the best part, with Slater deadpanning in that weird Nicholson impersonation, "I don't really like your friends, either."

Ok so... hmm. Instead of dancing in the dark walking through the park and reminiscing, I just watched the movie. A few things jump out at me.

First and foremost, the abusive sexual politics of the Slater and Ryder relationship. The movie means to be as much a parable about abusive men as anything else -- arguably moreso -- but it came out when I was 14, and that went right over my head. Watching it now, the first time he grabs her and forces a kiss on her to try to end an argument (and he does it several times), I got a cold chill. Holy shit, this guy is way scarier than I remembered. Scarier than the date-rape cow-tipping jocks, because at least they're stupid, and a smart girl like Winona can easily avoid them. But what to do with the sharp and silver-of-tongue who turn out to be icy cold? It's not like that's just a high school-specific problem. And sure there are Lifetime movies about it, but... no.

The other thing I didn't remember is that there's some lazy writing in places, and you can feel the script straining at the seams when someone goes into a speech that amounts to "this is the moral of this scene." And a lot of jokes could be delivered more dryly than they are and be better for it. But for every one of those there's something totally perfect, like the class overachiever remembering one of the dearly departed Heathers: "We used to go out. She said I was boring. But now I realize I really wasn't boring. It's just that she was dissatisfied with her life." Ah, comfort.

idk if its mentioned above anywhere but the commentary on the dvd is a really interesting conversation! one of my fav commentaries...awz details abt alternate ending riffing on dr. strangelove w/ martha dumptruck standing up from the wheelchair...what i wouldnt give to see that

On a kind of a primal-soup level of the screenplay, the movie does something that no screenwriting class would ever advise: it gives the audience no proxy. We sympathize with Veronica only because she's the only conscience in the movie, and without her the movie wouldn't just be a black comedy, it'd be fucking Sartre. But she's not awfully sympathetic, and she's miles from noble. On a strictly class-based reading of her character, she's totally unrelatable, because she's every ounce as rich as the other Heathers, which is confusing if you're looking for Frank Capra morals in the story. Why doesn't she just act like a bitch like the other rich girls? What exactly is her damage?

And even on a plot level she's not easy to cheer for. She's complicit with the Heathers, then with JD, but oh she feels guilty. How grand. She doesn't take any action at all, really, right up to the point where her own life is in danger. On the plus side, that is pretty much the moral compass that teenagers have, so that much is realistic. On the minus side (again, arguing from the traditional screenplay standard)... if self-preservation is the noblest thing that is to be expected of us, the implications of that are blacker than I really care to ponder.

Sarah, you have not read this thread yet. I address your very question somewhere way up there, a year or two ago.

geez - what am i doing with my life - getting drunk and trolling the Heathers thread .... yay me!

At least your bullshit doesn't have a body count. :)

don't worry, it's diet.

[^ said of a soda stain]

...sexually perverse photography exhibits involving tennis rackets.

some people need different kinds of convincing than others.

i don't patronize bunny rabbits.

dude ... pictures of aliens. REAL FUCKING ALIENS!!!

i love my dead gay son.

John Wayne was a fag.

kind of toss-up there, tbh. repo man's my favorite movie, tho, so this isn't a fair fite. what's a good dbl feature for repo man? metalstorm?

whether to kill yourself or not is one of the most important decisions a teenager can make.

when teenagers complain that they want to be treated like human beings, it's usually because they are being treated like human being.

^ these both work better if you sub person/people for teenager

Them!

or Penelope Spheeris' Suburbia

class of 1984

Escape from New York

I love the bunny rabbit exchange.

Veronica: "All we want is to be treated like human beings, not to be experimented on like guinea pigs or patronized like bunny rabbits."
Veronica's Dad: "I don't patronize bunny rabbits!"

I love that it's a joke about how badly she structured her sentence.

Heathers would be a good double bill with the Cheerleader Murdering Mom movie

so great:

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_C9PT1ikCFQ0/Rf3PhFqpX_I/AAAAAAAAAAM/JC2YO5mJEZg/s320/Class_of_1984_WB15004.jpg

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mHkcqpVtjvc&feature=related

serial mom? or the torn from the headlines one?

The VHS case says: The Positively True Adventures of the Alleged Texas Cheerleader Murdering Mom

starring Holly Hunter and Beau Bridges - it's actually pretty awesome

saw once upon a fuck of a long time ago, but can't now remember anything about it. was undoubtedly drunk. looks like the director also made fletch and the bad news bears, so he's okay in my book.

http://softskull.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/06/Heathers-Catalog-218x300.jpg

Very softly spitballed something to Winona where she would be a Senate page to a Senator Heather Something played by Meryl Streep. Intrigue ensues...Don't remember much else, except that Christian returns in Obi Wan Kenobi ghost capacity and Winona ends up having to save then assassinate the President, which is a good thing. It was all very cwazy [sic], but the punchline is that I ran into Winona a couple months later and she said, "I talked to Meryl at a party...and she's totally in!"

Heathers and Repo Man would be an Olympian double feature.

― I am Woolen Man. The scarf and I are one. (kenan), Thursday, January 20, 2011 1:54 AM (1 year ago) Bookmark

feel like you could learn a lot about a person by which of these two they preferred

So.... (Daniel Waters wrote it; his brother Mark is directing.)

http://io9.com/vampire-academy-is-actually-a-lot-funnier-than-we-expec-1443944986

http://www.theatlantic.com/entertainment/archive/2014/03/still-very-25-years-later-the-bleak-genius-of-em-heathers-em/359828/

EW oral history

http://insidemovies.ew.com/2014/04/04/heathers-oral-history/

WATERS The ending I should’ve fought harder for is where Martha Dumptruck pulls out a knife, stabs Veronica, and says, “F— you, Heather.” And Veronica’s on the ground laughing, with a knife in her stomach, saying, “My name’s not Heather. My name’s not Heather.”

haha omg

That was an outstanding read.

http://www.avclub.com/article/tv-land-makes-its-damage-known-announces-heathers--233866

sexually perverse photography exhibits involving tennis racquets

call me when the shuttle lands

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ct_lrDNvxoA

oh wow the marilyn manson cover of "tainted love" finally gets a new life

Nervous to watch that

Nope.

Well that was 100% depressing and vaguely alt-rightish

hooooooooooooly shit

ahahahahahahhahahaaha

this is either gonna be a total trainwreck or completely amazing

*me seeing this on sna* oh no did someone reboot heathers what an awful idea
*me watching this trailer* absolutely what the fuck no

So, this remake attempts "diversity" by giving us plus-size and queer Heathers, but makes the heroes two attractive hetero white kids? At best, this will be the very definition of the word pointless, and at worst...well, DJP already said it.

Wait yeah isnt the point of the movie the exact opposite of that??

watched a bit out of curiosity. ummm... nope.

nope as in 'not for me'.

Did You Eat A Hot Take For Breakfast?

i decided to check out at "i knew winona ryder from stranger things"

Uh, Christian Slater is the baddy in this film, my dude

People need to stop giving obvious clickbait the time of day. That said, the cafeteria shooting probably would be done differently if it was made now or even about twenty years back, I watched it for the first time a few years after Columbine and yeah...it felt off even then.

True friend’s work is never done.

Heatherspeak is like some kind of Nadsat.