Taking sides: footie vs. footsie

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I think footsie is a good game. Actually I think it's the most exciting one I've ever played, though one has always got to beware of getting the wrong person's foot.

Footie is also quite good, but girls tend to not be so interested. Also, money has ruined it etc.

Which is best?

N.B No FTSE nonsense.

― N., Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Footsie without a doubt. Beacuse of all the build up that surrounds it. I like flirting and I also like sexual tension, fun.

Football leads to conversations I don't understand or care about.

― Anna, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I don't know which is worse. Being kicked in the ankle by some would- be Romeo's steel toe capped Docs or sweaty trainers or being bored to tears by someone drivelling on about the beautiful game.

― Emma, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

i once received unsightly bruises from an overeunthusiastic footsie player. eversince, in the game of footsie, fear of injury has made me a defensive player.

with footie you can wear shinpads and be on the attack.

solution: introduce shinpads into footsie. under the table nobody can tell that you're kicking the shins off the light of your life, maybe even not them if their pads are of a good quality.

― nickie, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I am including all the carefully shifting your knee along so it's touching stuff as well. Footsie in the broadest terms, but only if done well.

― Anna, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I would rather kick a football around than have some mentalist bird thrust her Doc Marten clad hoof into my crotch as happened to me once, I may have told this story before.

― chris, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

What's with all this DM nonsense? What about with a nicer shoe or SOCKS?

― N., Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

then Nick, it's very classic!

But this horrible experience was one of my first, and it kinda put me off a bit.

― chris, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Why would I want some sweaty old sock probing around? This is reminding me of some awful British Upstairs Downstairs style sex romp film we once saw when the servants were canoodling under the dining table and kept bumping into the feet of the dining toffs and the dining toffs thought it was each other. Oh the hilarity. The climax of the scene involved the table cloth being whipped away to reveal the buxom maid and the footman and various blushing aristos. Classy.

― Emma, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

who says that money hasn't ruined footsie too?

― Alan Trewartha, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

You'd have to ask Chris that one.

― Anna, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

ooh it's a specialist service that, you'll probably have to pay extra if you want it kinky.

― chris, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I'm sorry, I couldn't resist that comment.

― Anna, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

you're a very cheeky young lady.

― chris, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

It is my perception that footsie has gone out of style a bit. No one seems to talk about it much, less still practice it. Is it a teenage thing or am I just not getting any?

― N., Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Ha! Yes! We are all sat at our desks right now engaging in frenetic footsie with our colleagues and only Nick is not getting any.

― Emma, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Knee-nudging is the funnest thing allowed in polite company. Otherwise, footsie wins for participation, footie wins for viewing from the sidelines. Whoo, way to take a stand.

― Pyth, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I wouldn't dare. Everyone thinks I'm creepy enough already.

― Graham, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Ah how I love whiling away Friday afternoons smiling coyly at my co-workers whilst stroking their legs gently with my feet.

(Footsie may be a dying art in these days of clubs and diner dates where you are either sitting too far apart or standing.)

― Anna, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Dinner dates, not diner which is too Happy Days for words.

― Anna, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Footsie has the huge advantage of not taking place on a cold Friday evening in the pissy rain.

― Jonnie, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Enjoy your game Jonnie!

I'm on my own in the office at the moment, but I'm not playing solo footsie.

― chris, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Footie and footsie pale besides ELBOWSIE - esp in cinemas, along the intervening arm rest, on first dates.

― Edna Welthorpe, Mrs, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Given the general thumbs-up given to footsie on this thread, perhaps we should change the rules of the forthcoming Primrose Hill Sinister v. ILE showdown. Or at least introduce a programme of alternative events. Stevie can sit in a corner playing elbowsy on his own.

― N., Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I think you all need to take a cold shower. Not together though.

― Emma, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I prefer footsie with barefeet...a well pedicured-pumice-stone- exfoliated silken naked foot sneaking under a blanket while you're on the couch watching a film.

― Evangeline, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I've never done aggresive footsie though. You know the scene, uptight family has invited the sexually wild girlfriend over and the boy is trying so hard to focus on his mashed potatoes but the girl's foot is in his lap and he is blushing! Or, when it's really crowded no-one knows who's footsie-ing who and it's grandma smiling wickedly, not the pretty girl.

― Evangeline, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Evangeline, where do you find such perfectly pedicured men?

― Emma, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

You can get away with playing footsie for longer before you get kicked out of class.

― Ronan, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Er....perhaps though not for too long in an all boys school.

― Ronan, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Sigh, Emma I have sadly not found any pedicured men such as that yet. I am living in a dream world and have to make do feelin' sexy with my own pumice-scrubbed feet. Men usually have odd toenail shape.

― Evangeline, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I like my feet.

― N., Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

No, elbowsie is good, a close cousin of the knee thing I mentioned.

― Anna, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I know. It's all good.

― N., Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

My old flatmate had the most horrendous feet ever, they were kind of prehensile claws and he used to play Tekken with his feet and beat most people playing with their hands (if you see what I mean). I hope he does not play footsie with his girlfriend.

― Emma, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Like in that advert?

― N., Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

This doesn't have a name but did anyone else get steel rulers and hold a lighter under them during class and then tap some fool on the shoulder and say "hey pass this to dastoor" or whatever and the minute they touch it it burns them and they throw it into the air and get in trouble????

― Ronan, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

The Lynx one? That's not really footsie is it? But his feet were worse than that. Coming down to the front room with a hangover and seeing his feet and Pete in a dressing gown has scarred me for life.

― Emma, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

My feet are long and skinny like my toes, but it's ok, I like them. They are good at picking things up, brushing my hair, etc. Although my friend said I was abnormal because my big toe is BIGGER than the second toe. I always thought that is how it's supposed to be, hence the 'Big Toe' title.

― Evangeline, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Ronan I never played that game. We normally played the game where you say Penis louder and louder when the teacher said a certain word.

― Evangeline, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

That was fun too. One of our teachers had a bizarre philosophy of ignore them and they'll stop which resulted in you screaming the word at insane decibel levels.

Also I remember sometime when I was 13 or 14 we decided to start humming. Like the whole class humming softly till it got to a huge buzz. er.....it was really funny back then.

― Ronan, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Evangeline. Yes. Second toe being longer means you're sensual/great in bed or whatever.

Ronan, I never played that game either but it does sound good. Did it cool down quickly enough for the victim not to be able to show the teacher what had happened?

― N., Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Oddly it never got to that stage, the teacher would usually just snap "pick that up" and not bother trying to sort out what had happened. I remember one day the ruler was dripping metal onto the ground and the guys hand was kind of injured. We felt a bit guilty but he was a friend of ours.

it also was fun to do with coins, because that way you could get teachers. though obviously it was harder cos the victim had to see the coin and pick it up, so it often took several attempts.

― Ronan, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I'm not getting any either, N.

― the pinefox, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Oh, the another one was when one person would 'accidently' drop their books on the floor followed by almost everyone. So normal people DO have bigger second toes? Back to the mutant den for me then...

― Evangeline, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Evangeline, I don't know what the stats are. All I know is that you're no good in the sack.

― N., Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Apparently men who bite their nails are more sensual too.

― Evangeline, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

We just coughed and sneezed en masse, leading the whimp-ass teacher to call us his Allergy Class. He never *could* keep order.

― Pyth, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I don't bite my nails but my second toes are longer than my big toes and my earlobes are big and my starsign is Taurus so overall on spurious sensuality pointers I am a winner.

― N., Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

And I am a Leo with an elbow that bends the wrong way, so ha!

― Evangeline, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

You are confusing sensuality with freakery.

― N., Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

One of my elbows bends the wrong way too, but that's because I broke it when I was 7 and they put it back wrong.

― Anna, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

you are confusing sensuality with freakery

A la George Micheal?

― Ronan, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Stevie is correct about elbowie. See also: train journeys.

Who is going to give the Pinefox some?

― Ally C, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

More importantly, who will reassemble Anna correctly?

― N., Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

elbowie = David in Spain?

― Dan Perry, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Leave the room.

― N., Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

GROAN

― Ronan, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

(hee hee hee hee hee)

― Dan Perry, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Dan Perry: Thread Killa.

― N., Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Fear my Ham-Fisted Pun Technique! KII-YAH!

― Dan Perry, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I have never done Elbowsie on a first date at the cinema. Maybe the hands meet when reaching for the popcorn, but what is that? Elbowsie occurs when you're in the backseat with your brother, painfully jabbing each other for pride's sake in getting the last jab and Father threatens to turn the car around

― Evangeline, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Anna, I have no excuse as I never broke mine. As Adina Howard once said "I got a lil' freakiness inside".

― Evangeline, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

My favorite way to create sexual tension is to start a fist fight. Nothing says loving like a punch in the mug.

― Mandee, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

You're crazee.

― the pinefox, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

You really said that, didn't you Dan? My head hurts.

― Ned Raggett, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Aren't I nutty? I have a busted lip today--someone was trying to prove their love.

― Mandee, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Mandy needs a roughneck nigga that can satisfy her!

― Tracer Hand, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

You really said that, didn't you Dan? My head hurts.

If I had refrained from saying it, I wouldn't be me.

― Dan Perry, Friday, 15 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

footie suX0r. i hate sport. footsie is fun.

― di, Saturday, 16 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Hey, I resemble that statement.

― Mandee, Sunday, 17 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

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